by Tiler Peck
“In order to choose the dancers who will be invited to attend the camp,” Madame Alla continued, “they are holding a series of competitions in cities across the world. One, the Youth America Grand Prix, will be right here in New York City next month, and you all have the chance to participate!”
The class exploded into gasps and applause and whoops of excitement. Katarina clasped Sunny’s hand, and across the circle she saw Celeste’s face, which was normally in a perma-frown when she wasn’t dancing, light up.
“You will have to work very hard if you want to win a spot,” Madame Alla told them. “There is another dance academy that will be a part of the competition, and only two dancers in total will be chosen to attend the camp. It will be difficult, but I have great belief in you. If you want to take part in the competition, speak to me after class. Now, time to warm up!”
Katarina’s mind was racing as she went through the now-familiar exercises of Madame Alla’s warm-up. She wanted to go to that camp more than she’d ever wanted anything in the whole world. But she was so new to ballet dancing. She’d been working hard lately, but she still had a long way to go to catch up with her classmates when it came to knowledge and technique, not to mention her pesky pigeon toes. How could she possibly hope to win one of just two spots that dozens of dancers would be competing for? Plus, Celeste was practically a lock for one of the spots, which really meant there was only one up for grabs.
Well, she was just going to have to work as hard as she could to give herself the best chance possible. Katarina concentrated extra hard during class, trying to leap a little higher, hold her back a little straighter, point her toes a little more.
“Pretty cool about the competition, huh?” Sunny said as they were packing up after class was over. “Man, I would love to win a spot in that ballet camp.”
“Me too,” Katarina said. Even thinking about it filled her with longing. “So, you’re going to sign up to compete?”
“Definitely!” Sunny said. Then her eyes widened. “Hey, what if we signed up together? We could dance a pas de deux!”
“Ooh, that’s a good idea!” Katarina said. “Pas de deux,” which meant “step of two” in French, was the ballet term for when two people danced together. Usually it was a man and a woman—like when Tiler Peck as Odette had danced with the man playing the prince in Swan Lake or when Romeo danced with Juliet—but it didn’t have to be. If she and Sunny danced together, it would surely be more fun. The competition would feel more like that day the two of them had danced for people outside of Lincoln Center and less like the anxious disaster that had been her performance at her school’s talent show. And with Sunny dancing there beside her, maybe no one would notice her turned-in toes! “Do you think Madame Alla would let us?”
Sunny shrugged. “No way to be sure except to ask her.”
The two of them joined the group of dancers who had crowded around Madame Alla to sign up for the competition. When it was their turn, they asked if they could dance together and she said they could.
“This is going to be great!” Sunny said as they walked toward the subway. “We have the perfect excuse to hang out every day now.”
“And you can keep helping me with my technique!” Katarina said.
“Absolutely! We’re going to have such a good time.”
“Well, we’re not just going to have a good time, right?” Katarina said. She loved how silly and fun-loving Sunny was, but she was determined to keep taking her ballet seriously after everything that had happened. “We’re also going to have to work really hard if we want any shot at getting into that ballet camp.”
Sunny waved her hand, as though batting away all of Katarina’s concerns. “Oh, yeah, totally.”
Katarina felt a little uneasy with her friend’s response, but she pushed that aside. This was going to be great.
* * *
Sunny came over to Katarina’s apartment the very next afternoon to start working on their pas de deux. They pushed the living room furniture against the walls and even moved her dad’s favorite chair, which Lulu was napping on, into the kitchen so that they’d have a big enough clear space to dance in.
“So, what kind of dance do you want to do?” Sunny asked as they stretched their legs, getting ready to work.
Katarina had been thinking about it all day and had nothing to show for it. “I don’t know. How are we even supposed to start?”
“Good question,” Sunny said. “Well, what’s a dance you love?”
That was one question Katarina didn’t have to think about. One dance immediately popped into her mind.
“That’s easy! The ‘Dance of the Little Swans,’ ” she said. Ever since the moment she’d seen the dance through the window at Electro-Land, she’d been in love. The way the ballerinas in their tutus and feathers moved in such perfect unison, like they were a single dancer instead of four separate people, was mesmerizing. And then seeing it live at the New York City Ballet had only made her love it even more.
“Okay!” Sunny said, standing. “We’ll start there, then. What do you love about that dance?”
“I love how energetic it is,” Katarina said. “There’s so much intricate footwork, and the dancers are so light on their feet. But at the same time, it’s also very difficult and delicate. Like they’re floating.”
Sunny tapped her fingers against her chin. “Hmm, difficult but delicate. That’s a tough balance, but I bet we can do it! What if we start like this?” Sunny stood beside her and held her hand, linking their fingers together. “Now, let’s do three chassés to the right.”
Together they did the skipping step three times until they ran out of room. It felt just right, full of energy but also light and graceful.
“I like it!” Katarina said. “Now, how about we let go and do a tombé pas de bourrée and then meet up again?”
“Yes!” Sunny said.
They worked this way for hours, suggesting steps to each other and trying them. Sometimes the step felt right and they kept it. Other times the step didn’t quite seem to fit, so they tried something else. Eventually Lulu got up from her nap and ran around between their feet, like she was trying to join in.
“Lu, be careful,” Katarina said when she almost tripped over the dog.
“I think she wants us to make this a pas de trois!” Sunny said, which was the term for a dance with three people in it.
Katarina laughed. “If we danced with a cute dog, we’d win the competition for sure.”
“Lapochka would definitely vote for us,” Sunny said. “There aren’t nearly enough dogs in ballet.”
Lulu barked her agreement, and the girls laughed and continued to work on their dance. The judges weren’t going to know what hit them!
Chapter 9
“KATARINA, TIME TO wake up!” her dad said, poking his head into her room. “Breakfast is almost ready.”
“Coming,” she said, climbing out of bed. Her muscles cried out at the movement. “Ughh…” She groaned.
“Sore?” her dad asked.
She and Sunny had been getting together almost every day to work on their pas de deux, and most mornings she felt like one big ache.
“It feels like someone squeezed me through the pasta roller you use to make linguine,” she said.
He laughed. “Well, just think of it this way: Soreness is your body’s way of letting you know you’re getting stronger and using the correct muscles.”
That did make her feel a little better. She hobbled to the table for oatmeal and fruit, and by the time she left for school, she felt almost normal again.
“How’s ballet going?” Amelie asked during art class as they all worked on their paintings.
“Good,” Katarina said. “I’ve been really working hard, and I think it’s starting to pay off.”
Grant frowned down at his painting, which looked more like a hedgehog than the vase of flowers they were supposed to be painting. “So, when do we get to see you dance?” he asked.
&nb
sp; “Well, we have a competition coming up in a couple of weeks,” she said. “The winners get to go to this really cool international ballet camp this summer. Would you guys want to come and watch?”
“Of course!” Michael replied. Somehow he’d gotten a dot of green paint on the tip of his nose. “We wouldn’t miss it.”
When the final bell rang at the end of the day, Katarina waved goodbye to her friends and rushed out of the school. Lulu was waiting for her by the fence like always, and she started to turn left toward home.
“Not that way, girl,” Katarina said. “We’re going to the subway.”
Lulu looked confused, but she dutifully followed Katarina in the opposite direction of home, toward the subway station. Usually on the days Katarina had ballet class, she went back to her apartment after school to have a snack and do her homework before catching the train to Manhattan with Sunny. But last night she’d emailed Madame Alla to ask if she could come in early to practice in the dance studio. She could dance better with the wide-open space and the mirror so she could see what she was doing, and there was less chance of her almost breaking another lamp if she lost control of a turn.
When the 7 train pulled into the station, Katarina listened for the sound of music. She heard the bang of Beatz’s drum and made sure she and Lulu got into that car. She might not have Sunny to ride with today, but at least she could see her other friend.
“Hey, Katarina Ballerina!” Beatz said, continuing to strum a melody on his guitar and bang his cymbals and drums. “I wasn’t expecting to see you yet!”
“Lulu and I are going to the studio early so I can get some extra practice in,” Katarina explained, taking a seat on the bench near Beatz.
“Good for you,” he said. “Real artists put the time in. When I was your age, I used to play my guitar for so many hours that my fingers would sometimes start to bleed.”
“Wow, really?”
“Yep, that’s how I got all these calluses,” he said, showing her his hands. The tips of his fingers were rough with thick skin. “All good guitarists have them. It means you’re working hard.”
“I’m starting to get stronger!” Katarina said. “At first my feet were tired after class from being in ballet slippers, but now I feel like I can just keep on going.”
Beatz nodded. “Same thing.”
When the subway reached her stop, Katarina said goodbye to Beatz and headed for the ballet studio. Madame Alla let her in.
“Thanks again for letting me come in early,” Katarina said.
“It is my pleasure,” the teacher said. “I’m happy you’re putting so much effort into your dancing.”
“Is it okay if Lulu comes in too?” Katarina said, gesturing to the dog at her feet. “She’ll be good, I promise.”
Just then Lapochka came running into the room. He strutted up to Lulu and sniffed around her, then touched his nose to hers. The two of them began to romp around the room, chasing each other and pretending to wrestle.
“It looks like she and Lapochka are best friends already,” Madame Alla said. “I will be in my office. Let me know if you need anything.”
“Thank you, Madame Alla.”
Katarina stretched while the two little dogs chased each other. By the time she was warmed up and ready to start dancing, Lulu and Lapochka had worn each other out and were sleeping side by side next to the piano. Katarina worked on her dance moves alone until the other dancers in her class started to arrive. She worked on her turnout so she could get her feet into proper fifth position. Katarina lifted her leg to the back to work on her arabesque with a nice, straight leg and pointed toe. And she tried to perfect her port de bras, moving her arms up and over her head gracefully like the dancers on the TV at Electro-Land—and just like she imagined her mom had done when she’d danced.
Over the last couple of weeks, her technique had really improved and she didn’t stick out like a sore thumb in class anymore. She could do all the steps the other dancers could do and almost as well. Her bun might not be as smooth and her turned-in toes might not look quite right, but she was getting a little better every day. All of her hard work was paying off.
After class, she went up to the ballet teacher. “Madame Alla, would it be okay if I came in to do some extra practice more often?” she asked.
“Of course. Any time, Katarina.” She winked. “Lapochka would appreciate the company.”
“Thank you, madame!” Katarina said. She and Sunny headed for the subway to return home. “Hey, you should come in with me next time. It would be great to rehearse our pas de deux in front of the mirrors so we can see if there’s anything that needs to be fixed.”
“Sure!” Sunny said.
They agreed to meet at the dance studio after school on Thursday, but their meeting time came and went and Sunny wasn’t there. Katarina stretched and began to practice on her own. Eventually, fifteen minutes after they were supposed to start practicing, Sunny came running through the door.
“Sorry!” she said. “I was talking to my friend Alice after school, and I totally lost track of the time.”
Katarina tried to push away her annoyance. It wasn’t like Sunny had been late on purpose, after all. It was an honest mistake. “That’s okay. Let’s get working.”
“Sure, but first I have to show you this hilarious picture I took of Milo this morning,” Sunny said, digging her phone out of her bag. “He fell asleep curled up in my mom’s house planter.”
Katarina sighed but looked at the picture. It was pretty funny, but she was ready to get to work.
“Okay, ready?” Katarina said.
She turned on the piece of music they’d chosen to dance to, and she and Sunny took their opening positions. When the notes began to play, they started to dance. Chassé right, chassé right, chassé right, tombé pas de bourrée, arabesque, and soutenu to the left.
So far, so good. Then it was a chaîné turn upstage, clasp hands, chassé to the left. Then Sunny hit a pose as Katarina did a double-pirouette turn and landed in fourth. Then it was Sunny’s turn. Katarina held her tendu back pose while Sunny was supposed to do a grand jeté and arabesque. But Sunny just stood there, wide-eyed.
“Wait, what am I supposed to be doing?” she asked.
How could Sunny not remember? Had she not been practicing? “Jeté and arabesque!” Katarina said, annoyed.
“Oh, right!” Sunny laughed at her forgetfulness and started to perform the steps, but the music had already moved on.
“Just keep going!” Katarina said, giving Sunny a light push toward stage right where they were supposed to be by now. Sunny wasn’t expecting it and almost tripped, which only made her laugh more.
“Easy, Katarina!” she said.
But Katarina could feel her face getting hot. “Stop playing around!” she snapped.
Sunny finally seemed to realize how angry Katarina was, and she stopped dancing. “What’s your problem?”
“You’re goofing off, and I’m trying to work,” Katarina said. “I want to win this competition and I can only do that if we take it seriously!”
“You’re taking it too seriously,” Sunny said. “We’ve been rehearsing almost every day! The world’s not going to end if I laugh or forget a step every once in a while.”
“But we don’t have much time until the competition, so we have to use every minute we get,” Katarina said. “I want to be a great dancer someday, and that means I have to work hard.”
Sunny threw up her hands. “But ballet’s supposed to be fun, remember? Isn’t that why you wanted to do it in the first place?”
“It’s not just supposed to be fun, though!” Katarina said.
Sunny stalked to the wall and grabbed her bag. “Well, right now it’s not any fun, so I don’t want to do this anymore.”
“Fine!” Katarina said. “Maybe I’ll be better off without you!”
“Fine!” Sunny retorted as she stormed out of the studio, leaving Katarina all alone.
Chapter 10
AFTER HER FIGHT with Sunny, Katarina couldn’t concentrate on dancing anymore. Her limbs seemed as heavy as lead, and the idea of trying to do a turn or a leap was suddenly exhausting. She gave up, and packed her things.
“Come on, Lulu,” she said. The little dog trotted up to her and gave her a lick on the cheek. “Let’s get out of here, girl.”
Katarina meant to get on the train home, but instead of riding west toward Queens, she found herself heading uptown. She emerged from the subway station in front of Lincoln Center just as the sun was beginning to go down and the windows of the theater where she and Sunny had watched Swan Lake were glinting orange. She walked to the spot where she and Sunny had danced that afternoon. A bunch of pigeons were milling around, pecking at invisible crumbs, and she swore it felt like they were mocking her with their turned-in toes.
No great ballerinas have turned-in toes, she seemed to hear them say as they cooed. You’ll never be a great dancer no matter how hard you work.
“Shoo!” Katarina said, scattering the birds. The backs of her eyes were stinging with unshed tears as she sat down on the paving stones where she and Sunny had danced together what felt like a lifetime ago. Dancing here that day and seeing her first live ballet had probably been the best day of her life, so how had she ended up here now, miserable and all by herself?
Lulu curled up beside her, pushing her wet nose into Katarina’s hand to be petted.
“Okay,” Katarina said with a small smile, scratching Lulu’s ears. “Not all by myself.”
Maybe Sunny was right. Maybe in her determination to become a better dancer, Katarina had lost sight of why she loved ballet in the first place. She loved the beauty of it. And it was a big connection to her mom.
But Katarina bet that her mom danced because of how it made her feel. Katarina was always worrying so much about her toes and her technique that she hadn’t had fun dancing in a long time, maybe since the day she and Sunny had danced right here in this plaza. If she worked her tail off and became the world’s best ballerina but she didn’t enjoy it anymore, then what was the point?
