She and Claire come out to the front together. I’m a horrible friend, but I had forgotten she was back there. She probably heard our entire exchange.
“I actually need to get going too. Ryke is at home with Aria and Jax, but he has to leave for the bar soon.”
I tell them both bye before they walk out the door. I love them both dearly, but when it comes to my dating life, or lack thereof, they like to meddle.
“You all seem pretty close,” Caden says once the door closes behind them.
I nod and give him a small smile. “We are. They are the best friends a girl could have.”
“I’ll take a half dozen of the lemon raspberry and half of the strawberry ones.”
I grab a box to fill his order.
“I’m sure they feel the same way about you.”
“Maybe.” The doubt is most likely evident in my voice, but I don’t know what I did to get so lucky. “They both helped me when I was at my lowest. I don’t think it’s possible to ever repay them for something like that.”
I don’t miss when his smile quickly falls from his face, but then he tries to cover it up once he sees that I notice.
“That’s what friends are for. Not just for the good times, but when we feel like we’re drowning and there’s no coming back. That’s when we need them the most.”
I’m not sure if he’s talking about Claire and Avery anymore, or if he’s referring to our newfound friendship, but his words give me a warm fuzzy feeling inside.
“Thank you,” I whisper and then point around to my still new bakery. “Then I came back to Phoenix, and they both surprised me by remodeling this place and bought me all new appliances. I should be the one doing stuff like this for them. I don’t deserve this.”
I’m embarrassed that I just admitted that out loud.
“I don’t think they would have done this for you if they didn’t want you to be happy. I think I like your friends even more than I realized.”
I chuckle. “They’re both married. Back off.” I love giving him a hard time, and he has no problem dishing it right back at me.
He gives me that sexy laugh again. I’ve never been so affected by a damn laugh before.
“In case you forgot, it was you I said I want to be happy.”
He drops a twenty-dollar bill on the counter and then turns from me.
“I’ll see you around, Sierra Greene.”
The door closes behind him, and I grab the money.
“Well, damn.”
14
Sierra
“Mommy!” my sweet boy yells as soon as he sees me enter his pre-k classroom in the high school. I bend down to his level, and he jumps into my arms.
“Hi, baby. How was your first day?” I ask him as I push his hair out of his eyes.
“It was good. We colored pictures and watched Cars!” he says excitedly.
“No way!” I say with mock enthusiasm.
“He had a really great day.” I turn toward the voice, and I’m greeted by a gorgeous teenage girl with blonde, curly hair. She’s wearing straight-legged, black jeans with a low-cut silver sequined top. She’s dressed a lot like how I did at her age.
“I’m so glad.” I smile at her and hold out my hand. “I’m Sierra, Jayce’s mom.”
She takes my hand and gives me a friendly smile. “Nice to meet you.”
“Can she come over to babysit some time, Mommy?” my boy asks, which completely surprises me because it’s rare he warms up to people this fast.
“Oh, um. Well, we’ll see, okay?” I tell him, not wanting him to push this subject anymore.
The girl laughs. “I actually love babysitting if you ever need anyone.”
“Thank you.” I set Jayce back down on the floor. “Go get your backpack, buddy. We need to get your brother.”
We drive across town to Auggie’s school, and my little man talks my ear off about all his new friends. I wish Miles was here so he could hear all about it too. I’ve been trying so hard not to think about him, but I continue to fail.
Seeing Caden again today made me happier than I’ve been in a long time. Don’t get me wrong. My sweet guys put a smile on my face every day, but it’s nice to feel wanted by someone again. Every time I see him, I temporarily forget about the mess my life is right now, and I momentarily let myself feel something besides sadness.
It’s time to move on.
I repeat the words in my head as I pull into the school parking lot. I want the action to be easier than it is, but the truth is, there’s a lot to think about if I consider dating again. First and foremost, I’m a mother now. I have to put my children before any man, and I don’t know if I’ll be able to find someone who is all right with that. Would Caden be all right with that? He was great with Auggie and Jayce both times that he met them. I don’t know him well. Okay, I don’t know him at all, but I have a hard time believing that he wouldn’t understand that they have to be my first priority.
Secondly, is he still interested in me? I’ve never even wanted to think about the possibility until I met him. That must mean something, right? I’ve had plenty of opportunities in the past to date, but I hadn’t wanted to.
“Mommy, are we gonna get Auggie?” Jayce asks from the backseat.
I shake my head, pulling myself out of the haze I was in. It’s easy to lose myself thinking about Officer Caden Harris.
“Yeah. Let’s go get him and pick up a pizza on the way home. How’s that sound?”
I see him in the rearview mirror jumping up and down in his seat. “Cheese please!”
* * *
We pick up a pizza and then settle in front of the TV to watch Despicable Me after the boys fought for ten minutes, not being able to decide on a movie. Everyone always tells me that boys are so much easier than girls, but most days, I doubt that. All I have to say is they’re lucky they’re cute, because I’m exhausted after a long day, and the last thing I want to do is hear them bicker.
For the next hour, I listen to those annoying yellow guys talk gibberish and mentally scold myself for getting annoyed with my kids earlier. I’d much rather listen to them than these Twinkie-shaped things.
I set my wine glass on the coffee table in front of me and look down at the floor to see both of them passed out. I smile at them as my chest swells with pride. As hard as being a single mom has been, I’m grateful I had them to help me get through such a loss. I’ve always felt bad for them because they didn’t have a father to help raise them, but had it just been me, it would have been so easy to give up. In a way, they saved me from myself, and I hope they always know how much I love them for that.
I pick up my phone to check the time and mindlessly scroll through Facebook. The next thing I know, I’m searching for a certain police officer who has been on my mind way too much lately. I don’t know what makes me do it. Okay, that’s a lie. I find that I want to know everything about him.
Caden M Harris.
There he is in all his handsome glory. In his profile picture, he’s got a pair of black Oakleys on along with a half-closed-mouth smile. He’s wearing his uniform and his arms are crossed.
I try to look at his other pictures, but he has it set to where I can’t see anything without being his friend. I contemplate adding him, my finger hovering over the button. Before I can decide, my phone starts to ring in my hand.
Glenna Greene calling
What the hell could she possibly want? I haven’t spoken to her since the boys and I visited her. The way she treated Auggie pissed me off, and I refused to get in touch with her again after that. She obviously didn’t care because she hasn’t called until now.
“Hello, Glenna,” I say in way of greeting, with a bite to my words.
“Sierra, darling. It’s so good to talk to you.” Gag. I’m guessing she’s around her friends right now, because she never speaks to me like this.
“Did you need something? I’m headed to bed in a few minutes.” It’s a lie, but I really can’t stand the woman, and
I’m bound to be in a shitty mood for the rest of the night after talking to her.
“Oh, yes. I won’t keep you. I was just wondering if you’d be willing to make some of your lovely cupcakes for our ladies’ tea coming up next month. I’d need five dozen.”
I shouldn’t be shocked, but of course she’s not calling to see how her grandsons are. I’m not sure if I should be pissed or surprised that she wants to give my bakery business.
“Umm …” I scratch at my head. I really could use the money, but I really don’t want to have to see her again anytime soon. I sigh. “Yeah, sure. Is there a certain kind you would like?” I reach for a scratch piece of paper along with a pen to write down her order.
“No, whatever you have will do. I’ll need them for the nineteenth of next month. Just let me know what the cost will be, and I’ll come in that morning to get them.”
“Sounds good. I’ll make sure they’re ready.”
That woman was not the woman I’ve known since I was a teenager. She was never pleasant but has definitely gotten worse.
Anytime Miles and I wanted to spend time together, we had to do it behind Glenna’s back. Thankfully Grandma Rose always liked him and had no problem with us being together as long as we stuck to her rules.
Now in a shitty mood, I cover both boys with a blanket, double-check the lock on the apartment door, and then collapse onto my bed.
As irritated as I am after that call, the last thing I think about before falling asleep is Caden.
15
Caden
I once again can’t get that blonde beauty out of my mind. I’ve missed feeling like this. In the last several years, the only thing I’ve cared about when it came to women was sex. I’m a man and had needs. Okay, I still have needs, but right now I want nothing more than to get to know Sierra Greene better. Don’t get me wrong. I know that sex with her would be the best of my life, but I can’t let myself think about that right now. She’s been to hell and back, so I refuse to push her for something she’s not ready for.
For that very reason, I’m going to let her do this her way. I hate not having control, but I know that she’ll be worth it.
After I visited her bakery the other day, I couldn’t keep the damn smile off my face. All the guys at the station gave me shit about it, but I couldn’t bring myself to care. There’s something different about her. She’s a mystery I want to solve. She often appears to be broken, which I know to be true, but I know that there’s so much more to her than the pain she’s had to endure.
I hated hearing her say she didn’t deserve what her friends had done for her. She has no idea how much I wish that it would have been me to do those things. I feel like I’m getting in way over my head like a damn teenage kid, but this is what she does to me.
I head to my locker in the breakroom after the longest shift of my life. I grab my bag and slam it shut and see Anthony walking toward me.
“Hey, man. You off on Saturday?” he asks as he works the combination on his locker.
“Yeah, what’s up?”
“Did you see the group text from Evan? They’re having a bunch of people over for a cookout and to swim.”
I dig my phone out of my bag, and sure enough I have a missed text from him.
“I just got it. Yeah, I’ll be there.” Fuck yeah, I’ll be there. His wife is best friends with the woman I can’t get out of my mind. I’d be a damn fool if I didn’t go.
I look up from my phone and notice the smirk playing on Anthony’s face.
“What?”
“What is with you?”
“Um… what the hell are you talking about?” Shit. I’ve been busted.
He shakes his head and laughs. “You’re acting like a lovesick bastard.” He pauses and then points at me and this time laughs harder.
I start to walk past him, trying to escape this conversation, but I know that he’s not going to let me off the hook that easily.
“Holy fuck. You screwed her, didn’t you?”
I spin around at lightning speed, and if looks could kill, the guy would be dead on the floor.
“Don’t you ever fucking talk about her like that again. Hear me?” I seethe. This is so unlike me. This is one of my best buddies, and I’m threatening him over a woman I hardly even know. But he just pissed me the hell off.
“Jesus, I was kidding. Chill out.”
“Sorry,” I mumble before turning and making my way out of the room. I feel like an ass, but I don’t need him spreading rumors that could get back to her. I’d feel like the biggest dick.
I’m a relaxed guy, and it takes a lot to get my blood boiling, until someone messes with something that’s mine. Jesus. Sierra is the furthest thing from mine. It seems that her husband still has a hold of her, and I don’t know if I can compete with him. She’s obviously not over his death. Not that I can blame her. I’ve never experienced losing someone like that before, so I can’t begin to fathom what she’s been through or how hard it must be for her to move past such heartache.
The smile that can light up an entire room is the one piece of hope that I’m hanging onto. That small gesture tells me that I make her happy, and maybe, just maybe, that happiness could one day be enough to help her move on.
I get into my truck and pull up my daughter’s number.
“Hey, Dad,” she answers after the first ring. I swear sometimes she ignores my calls, so it’s nice when she actually picks up.
“Hey, Kenz. Want to go grab some dinner? I’m off early tonight.”
There’s silence on the other end.
“Kenz, you there?” I hold my phone away from my ear to see if the call dropped, but then I hear her.
“Yeah, uh. I’m at Kyle’s.” Who the hell is Kyle?
“Who?” I try to recall if I’ve ever heard her talking about this kid, but nothing comes to mind.
“He’s my, uh, boyfriend.”
I can’t be an ass or she won’t talk to me about things like this. I always want my daughter to be able to trust me, even if that means being supportive of the dickheads she decides to date.
I clear my throat. “You never mentioned a boyfriend.”
“I thought I had. Sorry. I promise, it’s nothing serious. We only started seeing each other last week.”
It’s just like her to not mention this to me.
“What’s his last name?”
She shrieks in disbelief. “Dad, I am not telling you his last name!”
Of course, she knows what I’m up to.
“Is he from your school?” The damn place has sixteen hundred students, so there’s a good chance there are fifty fucking Kyles.
“Goodbye, Dad.” She laughs, clearly done with the conversation. I, on the other hand, will find out this kid’s name and will be doing a background check on him. Come hell or high water.
“Yeah, okay.” I sigh in frustration and drag my hand through my hair. “Be safe and I want you home by ten, all right?”
“Sounds good, bye.”
She hangs up and a wave of loneliness washes over me. I’ve always known that my baby girl was going to grow up and hanging out with her old dad would become a chore for her, but that doesn’t mean that I’ve accepted it yet. It’s just been the two of us for the last fourteen years. Don’t get me wrong. I love that she’s independent now, but lately I’ve been feeling like she doesn’t need me anymore. Well, she needs me when she wants to go to the damn mall or needs funds to go out with her friends.
16
Sierra
“Damn it.” I sigh in defeat as I lob yet another offending swimsuit onto my bed. I don’t know why I’m stressing out like this. Hell, who am I kidding?
I look at the clock on my dresser and see that we’re supposed to be at Avery’s in twenty minutes, so I grab the navy and white polka-dot tankini and quickly change into it before sliding on a pair of jean shorts and a white tank top.
I’m sure I’m overthinking this whole thing. Chances are, Caden won’t give a damn w
hat I look like. If he’s even there. Yeah, right. If I know my two best friends, and I do, they definitely invited him as soon as I agreed to come.
I walk to my dresser where my jewelry box sits and take a few deep breaths, stealing myself for what I’m about to do. If I ever want to move on, this is a step I need to take. No man wants to be with a woman who’s wearing another man’s ring.
I rest my hand on the wood and look up at my reflection in the mirror that sits on the wall. I can do this. I slide the diamond off my finger and kiss it before placing it safely in the box.
I sit on my bed, waiting for the guilt and regret to hit, but I surprisingly feel free. I’ll love Miles for the rest of my life, but I know that he’d want me to move on. To find someone who can take care of me and our boys. I don’t know if that’s Caden or some other man, but I do know that I’ll never be able to push forward if I’m always holding on to someone who is never coming back.
I smile to myself, proud that I could do this. It may be a small step, but it’s a step in the right direction.
“Mom, are you finally ready?” Auggie asks with irritation in his voice when I walk into the living room.
I stifle a giggle. “Yeah, let’s get going.”
“Yay!” Jayce shouts. “I want to swim like a fish!”
I gather him into my arms and then kiss his little cheek. “I can’t wait to see you swim like a fish, Jayce Miles.”
I look at Auggie who is facing me and see him roll his eyes, which causes me to roll mine in return. I didn’t realize the attitude would start so early. I guess I can’t really blame him. I am his mother, after all.
We drive across town and as soon as I park, both boys jump out of the car and dart into Avery’s house. Leaving me to carry the pies I baked.
“I’d say they become more useful once they’re older, but I’d be lying.”
I startle at the sound of the familiar voice, and the hairs on my arms immediately stand at attention.
Reawakened: The Unexpected Series Page 7
