by Erin Trejo
“Yo, Nuts!” Mayhem hollers. Fuck, I’m not in the mood. I turn around and look at him damn near laughing at the sight before me.
“Where did you steal that from?” I ask.
“Looks good on me, yeah?” he says.
That’s it, I do laugh now. Walking over to where he’s standing I look at the tiny baby in his arms sleeping peacefully.
“You stole a kid, huh?” I ask glancing up at him. He laughs a little and looks down at the sweet thing in his arms.
“Nah. Chick had to use the bathroom and asked Tay to hold it. I wanted to try it out,” he says, his face beaming with a happiness I’ve never seen in him.
“You want kids, Mayhem?” I ask a little unsure of what I see in his face. That look sure as hell seems like he wants one.
“Don’t know that I’d be a good dad,” he says sadly, more than likely remembering his own.
“You could do it, brother. That one sure seems to like you.” I grin and nod toward the little person in his arms.
“True enough.”
“Don’t give him any ideas, Nuts.” Taylor walks over with another woman who I assume is the baby’s mother. She beams with pride when she looks at that baby.
“I have to agree, that looks good on him, Taylor.” She shakes her head when I see Brooke out of the corner of my eye, shaking her head and clearly yelling at Dec.
“What happened there?” I ask Mayhem. His eyes follow mine and stop for a second.
“Who the hell knows. Go find out, yeah? I’m busy.” He basically just brushed me to the side for a baby. Ain’t that some shit! Shaking my head with a smile, I walk toward the small war that seems to be brewing between the two of them.
“Hey Dec!” I call out to him. He turns a frustrated head toward me and tips his head back.
“Where the fuck is Mouse and what the hell did he do to Cherry?” His voice his harsh and pissed.
“Don’t know where he is. What do you mean what did he do? They were over there kissin’ and shit earlier.” I cross my arms over my chest as Dec’s gaze falls on me hard.
“You wanted her here, Prospect! You wanted her all to your goddamn self today, and you fucked that up!” His hands clench at his sides as I slide my gaze to Brooke’s. She isn’t much better to look at, at the moment, although she’s still adorable when she’s mad.
“What happened, Brooke?” I ask ignoring the angry words coming from Dec’s mouth.
“She’s down there by the pond.” She grits her teeth which only makes her cuter.
I stalk past them both and head in the general direction. I can still hear Declan yelling about what I did. I don’t even know what the fuck I did. As I stride toward the pond when I see her curled into herself. It doesn’t take a genius to know she’s crying. I can see her shoulders shaking from here. A few steps closer and I almost lose my heart. Those sobs could rip me apart.
“Not sure what the hell is goin’ on but I’m bein’ blamed here,” I say mostly to see what she has to say. If she said I did something I didn’t, I may lose my shit all together. Club whores can be that way, although I don’t believe Cherry is.
“It wasn’t you. I’ll tell them it wasn’t.” She sniffles through each word. I sigh before sitting next to her, my knees bent, elbows resting on them.
“Wanna talk about it?” I ask, not looking over at her. I can feel her gaze on me, and God help me, I want to look over. I want to hold her but I saw her and Mouse.
“I didn’t want him touching me.”
Chapter 16
Cherry
“Motherfucker! This is my fuckin’ fault,” Nuts roars as he shoves himself off the ground. He stalks a few feet away from me his hands clenching at his sides. I can practically feel the anger rolling off him.
“He thinks he’s being used,” I say louder trying to get his attention. Nuts turns slowly watching me intently.
“What do you mean?” he asks. He doesn’t move to come closer and a part of me hates it. I shove off the ground and move toward him slowly, resting my hands on his chest. His eyes close and he sucks in a breath.
“We would never work, Nuts. They all know what I am, and it will never change. They will all always think they can take what they want from me.” I know that’s not what he was asking, but it’s the truth. It’s the same reason Mouse did what he did. Nothing will ever change. Nuts eyes slowly open, peering down at me. I shudder under his intense gaze. Nuts slowly brings his hands to my face, holding it gently in his hands.
“Make no mistake, Cherry. I’m not walkin’ away from you. I made a mistake lettin’ you walk around yourself. I should have known better, but now, you’re mine.” Nuts eyes my lips and my stomach clenches. I can’t let him have that part of me. It’s the last thing I have that hasn’t been tarnished by Justin. Nuts lowers his head but he must be able to see the fear in my eyes. He stops short and gives me a soft smile before he says, “Those lips make it hard for me, darlin’ but I will wait. Not much longer but I will wait.” His head moves, his lips connecting with my neck. I suck in a breath when he keeps those soft lips moving over my skin. His wet tongue glides up my neck stopping so he can nip at my ear lobe. My pussy clenches of its own accord. Nuts is turning my body on in a way no one else has.
“What’s wrong, darlin’?” he asks, and I can feel the smile on his face pressed against my skin.
“You know what you’re doing to me, Nuts,” I whisper softly. He knows. He just wants to hear it, but I won’t give in that easily.
“What am I doin’ to you?” he asks, his warm breath skating over my skin. My body is on fire with a need for him that I don’t want to rush. What if Nuts is different? What if he does want more than just a quick fuck with me? I don’t know that I can be more but I can try, can’t I?
“You’re making me hot, Nuts. You’re making my body hum with desire,” I admit that much to him. Nuts growls against me, pressing his dick into my stomach. I have to fight the urge to grab ahold of it.
“You’re killin’ me here, Cherry. Let’s get the fuck back to the fundraiser before I can’t keep myself in check,” he grumbles against my neck before pulling back. He looks down at me, and I can see the look in his eyes. He’s gorgeous and he wants me. Nuts kisses my cheek before grabbing my hand in his and pulling me along back to the party.
“Are you not worried about Mouse?” I ask him.
He glances over and shrugs before he says, “I’ll talk to Dec about it. Mouse has been off for a while now. He comes anywhere near you again, you get one of us. Preferably me.”
I nod my head when I hear Declan roar. We both look up at the same time to see him eyeing us. Nuts tightens his hand around mine.
“I’ll deal with him. You were my responsibility while we were here and I fucked up,” he says softly.
“It was my fault. I shouldn’t have walked off, but I never thought Mouse would do that to me,” I admit more to myself than to Nuts. I didn’t think Mouse would hurt me. I didn’t think he would act that way, but there is something off with him and I don’t know what it is. Maybe he truly thinks that they are treating him differently. Maybe he does think he’s being used.
“He’s a bastard. Don’t think about him. If Dec doesn’t deal with him, I sure as hell will.”
Chapter 17
Nuts
The fundraiser went well. Declan said we made a ton of money for the community. I’m glad. I know how much he wants to help out around here. I also know it’s personal to Declan. Mouse disappeared, much to my surprise. I wonder where the son of a bitch went. He hasn’t called in and no one has seen him since he walked off from Cherry the other day. It makes me wonder what the hell he’s up to. That was over two months ago. Since then plans have been forming for the best way to handle him.
“You think that run this weekend is gonna go well?” I ask Tic. He shrugs, blowing out a ring of smoke as we watch Jameson run around the yard.
“Can’t say. Southern chapter’s comin’ up. That shit should get good.” H
e chuckles softly. I take a long pull from my beer as I look at that little boy playing out there. He runs around laughing without a care in the world with Kenderly right behind him. That’s what I want. I want a kid and a good woman. I want that whole family thing.
“You okay, brother?” Tic slaps a hand across my chest.
I glance over and nod before I say, “Yeah. Just a little jealous. I want all that, man.” I nod toward Kenderly and J.
“Family has always been important. When it was just me and J, it all felt off. Havin’ Kenderly come into my life was a fuckin’ godsend. She means everything to me.”
I was there. I watched what happened to him when Ashley died, but I also saw the way he lit up when Kenderly was around. Their history and connection were different than what he had with Ashely. I have no doubt that he cared deeply for Ashley, but his love has always been with Kenderly, even if took him a while to figure it out.
“You think it’s worth it in this life?” I ask. I know to some it isn’t, which is why a lot of the guys never take on an old lady. They fuck the club whores and walk away.
“We protect what’s ours, Nuts. When she isn’t just a club whore, you’ll get it. You want to protect her now, but the deeper you get, the more you’ll feel it.” He glances over at me and I can see the understanding in his eyes.
“She deserves to be happy,” I say more to myself.
“She does. She just needs to see it for herself. You didn’t grow up in this, Nuts. You don’t know what it’s like to live everyday of your life in it. I’m not sayin’ that to be an asshole, I’m sayin’ it so that you can understand. Cherry is a strong person, but even the strongest fall.” Tic shoves out of his chair and heads out toward his son. Jameson runs and leaps into his arms.
“You doin’ okay?” Mayhem asks over my shoulder. I turn to glance at him and nod.
“Ready for the weekend,” I tell him. I’ve been amped up for this. Since we’ve found out that the Viral Dead have been running girls, I’ve been on edge. I want that shit handled. It doesn’t matter that I’m a prospect. Declan called me in on this run, and I couldn’t be happier about it. I know I’m the guinea pig. I know I’m the one who will take the ass of what comes at us, and I’m ready for it. Especially if it means that I can help save a poor girl from her ultimate fate if I don’t.
“Yeah, heard that. Ruger is on one. That motherfucker is ready to spill some blood. Crow, Ruger’s boy, ain’t far behind.”
I shove out of my chair and look over at Mayhem. “You think that shit ends it? There’s always another club, another set up. More girls gettin’ ran through that shit. How will it even end?” I flick my cigarette to the ground and walk past him. I know he feels the same. We might be on the wrong side of the law but not even we would run and sell girls for money.
I step inside and my eyes find her. She’s leaning over the counter laughing at something Brooke said. She looks happy in a way. Maybe she is. Maybe this is what makes her happy, but I think I can make her happier. Brooke nods toward me, and Cherry slowly turns to face me. Her smile fades slightly as she stares at me. I can’t pull my eyes away. She holds me hostage as much as I hate to admit it. Cherry shoves off the counter and walks toward me slowly.
“Are you okay?” she asks when she’s close enough. My dick jerks at the sound of her voice. I swallow hard and reach for her hand, holding it in mine.
“Sometimes I want to grab you and run. I want to take you as far as I can from here and show you what you deserve.” Her eyes flicker between mine.
“Sometimes you don’t,” she adds.
I shake my head. “No. This is your family, whether I like it or not. I get it. I get why they are, but I also know that you need more.” She squeezes my hand tighter as if she understands. I lean down and press a kiss to her cheek and whisper in her ear, “One day, Cherry. One day we will both have what we want.”
I kiss her cheek again and pull away. I need to put some space between us. I need her to think about what it is she really wants. I don’t know that chasing her is the best choice. I’ve thought about it too. I know I want her, but the way I go about it has to be something more. It has to prove to her that I want more than just a friendly fuck like the rest of them. I have to prove to her that what I want is different, that I am more than they are.
But right now I need to get my head in the game. I need to keep my head together to handle whatever is going to happen this weekend.
Chapter 18
Cherry
My stomach’s in knots. I debated coming today. I was lucky over the last couple of weeks that Justin hadn’t been there when I went to mom’s. I step out of my car and glance around. The place never changes. It holds so much pain and hate that I wonder why I even care anymore. I should hate her. I should never want to see her again yet I can’t seem to force myself to walk away from her. Could it be that she’s all I really have left of my past? Why should she be my past though? She’s the one that made me into who I am today. She forced this on me. I step inside and bile races up my throat. I swallow it back and glance around the disgusting place I was born into.
“Mom?” I call out when I don’t see her in her usual spot on the couch. When I don’t get an answer, I walk toward her room hoping she’s taking a nap.
“Mom? Are you here?” I push the door open to find her lying on the bed. Reaching down I check to see if she’s still breathing. When I feel her warm breath hit my fingers, I pull back. I stand in silence staring down at her.
“It would be so easy to kill her, wouldn’t it? I’ve thought the same thing over and over but then what would bring you back to me?” Justin’s voice sends chills down my spine. Sweat from the warm house begins to bead on my temples.
“What did she take?” I ask changing the subject. I don’t want to do this with him today. I’m actually hoping he leaves me alone.
“A little of everything. You want to try some?” he asks, his hands coming to rest on my shoulders. I shudder under his touch.
“No. I was just dropping off the money,” I tell him, taking a step out of his grasp. I don’t make it far. Justin wraps his hands around my waist and drags me against him. My breathing is sporadic as panic begins to set in.
“Please, leave me alone, Justin,” I beg. He chuckles in my ear before shoving me roughly onto my mom’s bed, next to where she is oblivious in her drug-induced sleep. I roll over and kick my legs trying to keep him back.
“Don’t fight me, Cherry. You know how much I like it,” Justin growls. My heart hammers in my chest. I will never be free of him. I will never get away from him, and as soon as Nuts knows what he does to me, he won’t want me either. I slide against the headboard and watch as Justin fills a needle with some clear substance. Panic begins to shake my body the closer he inches to me.
“Oh, come on, Cherry. You remember how fun it was when we’d do this?” He holds the needle up so I can see it as he walks around the edge of the bed. I shake my head no but he doesn’t stop. He grins that hideous smile of his before wrenching my arm into his. The needle slips into my skin before I feel the warmth of that liquid seep into my veins. My body thrums, my head spins.
“Justin, please,” I beg him. He pulls the needle free and grins at me.
“You love it, Cherry. You know you do.” He chuckles.
I hate him. I hate him so much. The thought of telling Nuts what he has done to me has crossed my mind. I’ve thought about telling Declan too. I know they would protect me. I know they would stop him, but then what would they think of me? What would they say about me? Surely none of them would want me after they knew.
Justin grabs my ankles, pulling my paralyzed body toward him. His pants hit the floor quickly before he makes short work of my clothes. My stomach trembles. If only they knew the way he’s used me for years against my will. If I could tell them, maybe it would ease my mind but I can’t. They wouldn’t understand that what he does to me, I don’t want. At the club, I’m somewhat in control. At least I know I
’m safe there. Guys may hurt me when they fuck me but I am completely safe.
“God, Cherry. Your body gets better and better,” he groans as he slips his finger between my thighs. I want to move. I want to push him away, but I can’t; whatever he pumped into my system is taking control of all my movements. I’m rendered helpless to his attack.
“Please,” I whimper begging him to stop. Justin just laughs and plunges into me. I can’t even feel the pain. I don’t feel anything. His face is inches from mine when he looks me in the eyes.
“You know you were always my favorite.”
What the hell does that mean? His favorite what? I want to ask but I don’t. I know I can’t handle anything else he has to say to me. Justin thrusts into me, but I can’t feel it. I’m almost thankful for that too.
“Don’t worry. I will leave my mark!” As if he knew what I was thinking, his teeth sink into my shoulder. My mind draws a blank.
At some point, Justin was done using me. I don’t know how long I’ve laid here trying to get some sort of feeling back into my body. When I can register I have feet again, I shove off the bed in a daze. I suppose I should be thankful that mom was passed out on the other side of the bed the whole time. I grab my clothes and pull them on as best I can before stumbling out to the car. My head is spinning and my body feels like it’s made of jello. I do the best I can to stay awake as I drive back to the clubhouse. The whole drive there is confusing as hell. I’m not even sure I make the right turns. My head buzzes as I slam into something. That’s it. That’s all the strength I had left in me.
Chapter 19
Nuts
“What the fuck was that?” Declan roars. We’re all on our feet with guns drawn. The sound of glass breaking and what sounded like an explosion vibrated the walls. We all share a glance before Richy ushers the girls toward the back room. Declan gives me a nod as we file out the side door where the sound came from. I don’t see anything.
