To Heal an Earl

by Aston, Alexa

  Still, she wanted to look her best as she marched into battle with him, for that’s what it would be. He would try to convince her not to leave. Charlotte must stand firm against whatever onslaught came her way. Her heart told her it was what had to be done.

  She arrived and saw that neither Harriet nor Jane was present. Gray was, though. He looked up from the newspaper he was reading and lowered his cup of tea, placing it on the table.

  Joining him, she sat on his right. A footman placed a dish of eggs and ham before her, along with toast points and a jar of marmalade. A second one brought her a cup of tea, already fixed the way she liked it.

  “I must speak to you privately,” she said quietly and took a sip of the tea to fortify herself.

  “Leave us,” Gray said, his voice soft but commanding.

  The moment they did, he reached for her hand and kissed it.

  “No, Gray,” she said, pulling it away.

  “I know. The girls. Isn’t it about time—”

  “I’m leaving,” she said abruptly.

  He stared at her, wordless, his blue eyes darkening in anger.

  “I’ve accepted a new position as a companion to—”

  “No.”

  “No?” she asked, anger rising within her. “It’s my right to seek employment wherever I choose, Lord Crampton.”

  His fingers latched on to her wrist. “You are not going anywhere, Charlotte. Not after what has passed between us.”

  She tugged but he refused to yield. Calmly, she said, “That was a mistake.”

  Hurt filled his eyes, quickly followed by a steely resolve. “You truly think that?” he asked, his voice low and dangerous.

  She bit her lip, trying to think of a response. Being firm wasn’t working with him. She would have to soften her stance.

  “Gray, what we shared was lovely. I will forever treasure the memories of our time together. But you need—”

  “What I need is you,” he said fiercely.

  She strengthened her resolve. “What you need is a wife. You’re already a father to two lost, lonely girls. You are helping them to heal, as they are you. A proper wife will complete the picture. She can provide you with an heir.”

  “What if you are already with child, Charlotte? Have you thought of that? You could be carrying my heir.”

  The nails on her free hand dug into her palm. How foolish she’d been. Smart, practical Charlotte Nott hadn’t even imagined what they’d done would cause her to be with child.

  “If I am, it’s your bastard,” she said coldly. “Not your heir.”

  Gray stood so fast, he knocked his chair over. He jerked her to him, his face so close it almost touched hers.

  “There’ll be no bastards, Charlotte. No other women. You are the one I choose. You are the one I love. You will be the mother of my children, including Harriet and Jane.”

  With that, his mouth came down on hers, hard and angry. She refused to yield to him and he gripped her shoulders painfully. When she cried out, his tongue invaded her mouth.

  She tried not to kiss him back. She stood there, not moving, not thinking.

  And then she gave in.

  Her ferocity matched his, as they fought for domination. He deepened the kiss, one hand cradling the nape of her neck, his arm going about her waist and holding her to him.

  As they kissed, she realized he’d said he loved her.

  Loved her?

  Hope—the hope left from Pandora’s box—called to her.

  Charlotte went limp, letting him have his way with her, kissing her until she was spent.

  Sensing her surrender, he broke the kiss.

  “Did you hear me, Charlotte Nott? I love you,” he said fiercely. “I love you. I want to spend all of my days and nights with you. I thought you understood that. That my body told you though I hadn’t said the words. I wanted to tell you but I was afraid it was too soon after Rodger’s death to discuss our feelings. To plan for our future together.”

  Gray hesitated. “Do you feel the same about me, Charlotte? Do you love me as much as I love you?”

  She burst into tears and buried her face against his chest. He stroked her hair, kissing the top of her head, murmuring soothing words as his hands ran up and down her back.

  Lifting her tear-stained face, she asked, “Is this real? Am I truly hearing the words I dreamed of?”

  He kissed her with such tenderness that more tears spilled down her cheeks.

  “I love you, Miss Nott. You have changed me for the better. And I refuse to accept your resignation. You are to remain in this family always. Not as a governess—but as my countess.”

  Gray kissed her again with enthusiasm. “It’s such a relief to say the words. To tell you how I feel.” He frowned. “But . . . why would you want to leave, Charlotte? Make me understand.”

  She swallowed, the back of her fingers stroking his beautiful face.

  “I’ve always had feelings for you, Gray, but you ran away to London. I was very angry at you for abandoning the children—and me. Then you became the new earl. I knew you would have to wed in order to get an heir. Why would I think you would entertain the idea of marrying a lowly servant?”

  A slow smile spread across his face. “Oh, but you aren’t just any servant. You’re a governess. The perfect governess. You’re our Miss Nott.”

  He kissed her again.

  “I knew as the Earl of Crampton that you would need to marry a lady of the ton. One who could be a good example to Harriet and Jane. A woman who was your equal.”

  “You’re more than my equal, Charlotte. You are superior to me in every way.”

  “Even the way I dress?” she teased.

  He chuckled. “Well, that does leave something to be desired. I did note your new gown when you came in though it’s as bland and shapeless as all your others are. You have a stunning figure, sweetheart, with beautiful breasts and luscious curves. I cannot wait to get you to a decent modiste so she can let the world see your physical beauty.”

  Gray kissed her sweetly. “But you are more than that. You are beautiful inside, Charlotte. It’s your shining belief in me that has helped me turn a corner. You’ve also worked wonders with the girls. My nieces will be thrilled when they learn you’ll be my wife.” He hesitated. “You will be my wife, won’t you, Charlotte?”

  “Is that your proposal, Gray?”

  He sighed and dropped to one knee. Capturing her hands in his, he proclaimed, “You are the woman I want to be my wife. My countess. My everything. Will you marry me, Charlotte Nott?”

  Without hesitation, she said, “I’d be most honored to, Lord Crampton.”

  He sprang to his feet and kissed her enthusiastically. Then breaking the kiss, he looked around. “Where are my nieces? We must share this good news with them.”

  “They may be sulking,” she said. “I told them of my plans to leave last night.”

  He frowned. “I’m sure they didn’t take that well. Harriet would be angry and defiant, while Jane would have sobbed.”

  “You know them well.”

  He took her hand. “Come. Let’s go upstairs.”

  “Wait.” She reached for her napkin and dabbed at her eyes. “I’ve done quite a bit of crying.”

  “But today’s tears were ones of joy.”

  She cupped his cheek. “They were.” She sighed and then asked, “Do you really think I might be with child?”

  “I hope so,” he said, grinning wolfishly. “I’ve already purchased a special license for us to wed.”

  His words shocked her. “When did you do that?”

  “Yesterday. With the girls. We went to the British Museum. Flew a kite in the park. And stopped by Doctors Commons. They had no idea what papers I requested and paid for. But I have the license. I suggest we wed soon. Just in case you are with child.” He kissed her. “Oh, Charlotte, how could you not think I wouldn’t wish to marry you after what had passed between us?”

  “I suppose my wisdom doesn’t extend to
bedroom matters.”

  He gave her a wicked smile. “Oh, I think you’re learning quite nicely there, my love. You’re even teaching me a few things.”

  “I am?” she asked coyly, batting her lashes at him.

  “Miss Nott is flirting!” he proclaimed. He kissed her hand and added, “I cannot wait for it to be Lady Crampton who flirts with her adoring husband.”

  Charlotte gave him a beautiful smile. “Oh, Lady Crampton will do much more than flirt, my lord.”

  His arm snaked around her waist. “I’ll hold you to that, my lady.”

  “About that, Gray,” she said.

  Before she could tell him about her past, a loud rap sounded at the door. She pulled away from him as he said, “Come,” and Betsy rushed in. The servant’s face was bright red and she looked frazzled. Charlotte worried that Harriet and Jane had gotten into some terrible mischief.

  “The girls are gone!” Betsy wailed.

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  “What?” Gray roared, fear rippling through him. “What do you mean—gone?”

  Charlotte put a hand on his arm and flashed him a look of warning. He tamped down his emotions and allowed her to speak to the servant.

  “Betsy, come sit a moment,” Charlotte said, her tone soothing as she led the young woman to a chair. “Now, why do you think the girls are gone?” she asked calmly.

  Betsy sniffled. “They aren’t anywhere. Their beds have been slept in. I saw you put them to bed last night, Miss Nott. But when I went in this morning, they weren’t there.”

  “Did the check the schoolroom?”

  The servant nodded. “I’ve gone all over the top floor, Miss. Then searched the other floors. Where could they be?” she asked, beginning to sob again.

  Gray stepped forward. “I’ll gather the servants.”

  He found Roy and said brusquely, “I need every servant in the foyer within five minutes, from scullery maids to grooms and everyone in-between.”

  The butler rushed off, obviously understanding some dire situation had occurred. By now, Charlotte had followed Gray, Betsy trailing behind her, wiping her face with her sleeve.

  He went and laced his fingers through Charlotte’s, needing to feel her warmth.

  “We’ll find them, Gray,” she said quietly.

  “I know,” he said, thinking if he voiced it aloud, it would have to come true.

  Her gaze met his. “This is my fault. I told them last night I had accepted a new post. I had no idea they would react this way.” Her mouth trembled.

  “It’s not your fault,” he said gently. “You’ve told the girls actions have consequences. Encouraged Jane not to blindly follow Harriet’s lead in matters. They are the ones who left. You didn’t push them out the door.”

  He saw pain fill her eyes. “But now, my actions have resulted in these consequences.”

  He tightened his fingers around hers. “It’s not your fault, Charlotte,” though he could see she firmly believed it was. “Let’s go to the foyer.”

  Already, a good dozen servants stood there and within minutes, the remainder of his staff arrived.

  As he stepped forward to address them, he sensed himself going into what he called battle mode. He grew acutely aware of his surroundings. His emotions were pushed far away so that only the rational, unemotional side came forward.

  “My nieces have gone missing. Or I should say, I believe they have run away.”

  Gasps filled the air and he heard the murmuring. His look silenced the voices.

  “Betsy has already searched the house but I’d like her and Mrs. Purcell to do so again, from the top to the bottom. Look in every room. Under every bed. In nooks and crannies. Even in the stables.”

  The housekeeper nodded. She motioned to Betsy and the two women left.

  “As for the rest of you, I’ll be sending you out to search in pairs. Think of the blocks surrounding us as a grid. I want you to walk where I assign you, looking in every alleyway, talking to everyone you pass. We’ll fan out for two miles since we have no idea when they left.”

  He took a deep breath. “When you reach the limit, do the same as you return, looking just as carefully in the same places because you might have missed them before. By now, they will be cold and tired. Hungry. They may be making their way back. They may have become lost. Keep sharp and alert.”

  Gray then broke the entire staff into pairs, male and female, knowing they would think to look different places. He assigned the route each should take and they left, two at a time until all were gone.

  Returning to Charlotte, he cupped her face and said, “They’ll fan out in every direction but I intend to ride beyond those boundaries. I’ll visit everywhere we did yesterday, in case they’ve returned to any of those places.”

  Her fingers tightened around his wrists. “Let me go with you,” she pleaded.

  “No. If they return, they’ll want to see you. Your place is here.”

  Tears streamed down her face and he enfolded her in his arms for a brief moment. Then releasing her, Gray strode from the house.

  *

  Charlotte took a seat in the foyer, wanting to be close to the door in case Harriet and Jane came home. She berated herself for telling them she was leaving.

  Why had they run away?

  It frightened her that they were out in a city which teemed with thousands of people. Though the townhouse sat in Mayfair, it was a short distance to seedier neighborhoods. She feared the girls would disappear and never be seen again. If that happened, she would never forgive herself.

  And Gray would never forgive her.

  Oh, for those few brief moments when they’d been together. When he’d told her he loved her and wanted to marry her. It would be the happiest memory she would ever have, knowing she had gained the love of such a good man.

  Charlotte realized even if the girls were found unharmed, she wouldn’t be able to stay. How could she, when she’d been the cause of them leaving? Gray would never look at her the same again. She almost wanted to leave now so she wouldn’t have to face him. But she was no coward. She had survived other situations and would this, too. She would stay and pray and see the girls safe again before she exited their lives.

  Mrs. Purcell and Betsy returned after being gone over an hour. Both women shook their heads, no words necessary. Charlotte hadn’t thought the women would find Harriet and Jane but it still caused her heart to ache. Her tears had subsided and she sat numbly, awaiting the return of the search parties. Betsy said she was going out to help and left them.

  “Can I get you anything, Miss Nott?” Mrs. Purcell asked.

  “No. Thank you,” she said dully. “I will wait here.”

  Another hour passed and several pairs returned to check and see if the girls had returned. When Charlotte told them they hadn’t, every servant turned and went out again, promising to scour every street and alley and shop, now that the stores were opening.

  A sharp knock sounded on the door, startling her. She rushed to open it and found a woman of medium height standing there, her dark brown hair starting to show a few streaks of gray.

  “Good morning. I’m Miss Wight. I have an appointment to see Lord Crampton.”

  Charlotte swallowed painfully. She’d forgotten Mr. Hammond was sending the new governess around this morning. And that Charlotte herself should be on the mail coach to Lincolnshire in a few hours.

  After hesitating a moment, she invited the woman in.

  “I am Miss Nott,” she said.

  “Ah, you are the current governess. I wish you well in your new post. Might you have some time to speak to me about my pupils and their academic progress? I believe they are six and eight.”

  “Yes. Lady Harriet is eight and Lady Jane is six.” Charlotte shook her head. “Oh, Miss Wight, I fear you will want to consider a different position after I tell you what’s going on here.”

  Surprisingly, the woman took Charlotte’s hands. It was then she realized her own were colder than ice. />
  With sympathy in her eyes, Miss Wight said, “Please, Miss Nott. Share with me what’s happening. I knew something was amiss the moment you opened the door and not the butler or a footman.”

  She steeled herself. “The young ladies are missing. We fear they’ve run away. Lord Crampton and the entire household is out looking for them now.”

  “I see.”

  “They’re not bad girls,” Charlotte quickly said, not wanting Miss Wight to judge Harriet and Jane harshly. “They are merely high-spirited. Very bright. But they received some . . . upsetting news last night. It affected them more than anyone could have realized.”

  “I know from Mr. Hammond that they’ve recently lost both their parents and their brother. What else has occurred that would cause them to act in such a drastic manner?”

  Tears welled in her eyes. “I told them I had accepted another post and that I would be leaving today,” she said bleakly.

  Miss Wight’s hands tightened on hers. “Then they must love you very much, Miss Nott. It’s not your fault.” The older woman smiled. “I wouldn’t think of going anywhere else. Lady Harriet and Lady Jane sound quite interesting. I look forward to teaching them.”

  Relief swept through her. This competent, pragmatic woman would take care of her girls, for that is what Harriet and Jane were to Charlotte.

  “I think we should see about getting you a cup of tea, Miss Nott. You could certainly use one.”

  She didn’t protest and said, “Let’s go to the kitchen. We may have to fetch it ourselves. Everyone from scullery maids to our head groom is out searching.”

  They found Mrs. Purcell sitting alone, nursing her own cup of tea. Charlotte introduced Miss Wight to her as the new governess and the housekeeper had them sit, bringing cups to them both. She appreciated that neither woman tried to make small talk as they sipped the hot brew.