by PJ Fernor
“Yeah. I was just filling Ben in on everything. We were going to go back there and talk to her again. She knows more than she’s letting on.”
“Well, good luck there,” Johnny said.
“Why?”
“Martha was found dead today,” Johnny said. “Suicide. Overdose.”
I slowly put the phone on my desk and put it on speaker.
Then I reached for my chair.
Johnny had been right.
I should have been sitting down.
Chapter Fifty-Five
Ben opened the door to the small cafe and nodded.
“We both need this,” he said.
The Winnie was a classic staple in Sandemor history. It had been everything from a bakery to a diner back to a bakery, forward to a dessert shop, then shut down for a year until the great-granddaughter of the original owner bought it and opened it back up as a mix of everything. Coffee. A small menu. And a small bakery.
Ben waved to Cheryl - Winnie’s great-granddaughter - and put up two fingers.
Cheryl nodded and went to get coffee.
Ben pulled a chair out for me and we both sat down at the same time.
“We needed to get out of the station,” he said. “It feels like it’s getting smaller in there.”
“No. We’re just getting closer to something bigger.”
“You always go for the big one, huh?”
“I go for the truth, Ben.”
“I’m just messing with you for a second, Allie Down. What’s going on here is intense. We’ve been through a couple cases since you came back to town, but this one… it’s so quiet around town yet it feels so loud. But we’re the only ones who can hear it.”
“I guess in a way that’s a good thing,” I said. “Last thing we need is everyone around town to be getting involved.”
“Just as long as everyone is safe,” Ben said.
“I agree. But it doesn’t seem like much is happening in the heart of the town. It’s on the outskirts. That makes me wonder if there’s something out there. Maybe a cabin. A house. I don’t know… kind of what we dealt with before.”
“Should we go back to that place?” Ben asked.
“Last I heard, it was knocked down,” I said. “Which is good. Don’t need punk teenagers going there to take pictures and brag how they saw the makeshift cabin where girls were kidnapped and killed.”
Ben shook his head. “That makes me shiver. I think about that one every now and again. I think about them all.”
“I still think about Patrick,” I said.
I cringed at admitting that.
“Oh, Allie,” Ben said. “That was…” He stopped himself. “Never mind. No use in saying anything.”
“Thank you.”
Cheryl came to the table with a coffee for each of us.
“Thanks, Cheryl,” Ben said.
“No problem,” she said. “No charge either. Police and detectives always eat and drink for free.”
“No, we can pay,” I said. “You have to support yourself here.”
“Two coffees won’t shut me down,” Cheryl said with a wink.
“What about two lobsters for breakfast?” Ben asked.
“You find the lobsters and I’ll cook them,” Cheryl said. “Don’t let me steal any more of your time.”
She walked away and I reached for the sugar and the small containers of creamers.
I loaded up my coffee and sipped it.
“How’s Lo?” Ben asked.
“I told her stay home from school today,” I said. “Avoid everyone. Miss Kesslier is lingering around. I don’t know what to say to her. She was finally on a good path, Ben. Talking to a therapist. She met a friend. A true friend. And the entire time I thought she met Steph through Dr. Jerry’s office. That’s what Steph told Lo. That’s what Lo told me. Even talking to Steph…” I looked out the window. “You know, if she’s part of this, then she’s one hell of an actress. She put up a good front and really had Lo and I convinced. And that scares me. I wonder how far this goes. How many are involved? How many are just like Steph?” I looked at Ben again. “Fake. You know?”
Ben nodded. “Fake. That’s terrible for Lo. To have that trust with someone and it was for nothing.”
Like us?
“And I know she’s hurting over Trevor,” I said. “I don’t even know what to do there. He didn’t kill anyone. We all know that. Laura has to go with the evidence. She has those above her to keep happy. She has to keep the town happy and safe too. But to put Trevor up on a pedestal and declare him a murderer…”
“It’ll ruin his life,” Ben said.
“Worse than it already is thanks to his mother.”
“That just means we have to find the truth,” Ben said. “Someone put the bracelet up there to throw us on the wrong trail. Who? No clue. But we’re not going down that trail anymore.”
“Until Laura starts breathing down my neck again,” I said. “She’s got me on a leash now, Ben. It’s a long one, but it’s there.”
“She’s got a tough job here,” Ben said. “There’s been talk for years now about merging our department with county. Turning it into one big police department. With that, there would be some let go. County would want their guys to patrol here.”
“Meaning the response time would be horrible,” I said.
“Right. Laura’s fought hard to keep us going. A case like this just adds to the pressure. County would love to send their detectives over.”
“And if they did, they’d have Trevor in jail and the case moving forward.”
“Exactly,” Ben said.
“So, no pressure for us,” I said.
“None at all,” he said with a quick grin.
He sipped his coffee.
“I can’t believe Martha is dead too,” I said. “That’s three people who touched this case in some way who ended up dead.”
“All by an overdose,” Ben said.
“Two with their own medications. And Chelsea…” I sighed. “Martha said Chelsea would never use drugs.”
“Now that doesn’t matter,” Ben said. “Martha can’t even confirm it to anyone else.”
“This is twisted, Ben. I feel like someone is watching me. Or us. Someone is right there as things happen. Too close… way too close…”
Ben nodded.
We fell into a silence for a good minute before I broke it up with a completely off the topic question.
“How’s your father?” I asked.
“Same. Good and bad.”
“I’m sure Sandra makes it easier. For both of you.”
Ben sucked in a breath. “That has its moments too, Allie Down. If you must know.”
“Oh?” I asked.
“I’m not sure what it is there, okay? A couple dates with her. They were nice. It was nice to talk to someone. And it was convenient that she was there to help with Dad too. Right now, that’s all it feels like to me. Just convenient. Stale. I don’t know…”
“You’re not using her, are you, Ben?” I asked.
“What? No.”
“That would be wrong to do. Unless you both are okay with that kind of arrangement.”
Ben shook his head. “It’s not like that at all, Allie. I’m not that kind of guy.”
“I know you’re not,” I said. “I just had to say it. As a woman. You know?”
“At the same time, can I ask about you?” Ben asked. “You’re dating Lo’s therapist, right?”
“Dating?” I asked. “I’m not dating anyone, Ben.”
“But you’ve seen him. Right?”
“Right,” I said. “Casually. As you said… it was nice to talk to someone.”
Ben reached across the table and put his hand to mine. “I’m glad we can at least be this, Allie Down. I know we have the job smashing us together every day, but it’s good to have this too.”
What? Talking about the people we’re forcing ourselves to date so we try to forget about the feelings we have for each other?
�
��I agree,” I said with a small lump in my throat.
I sipped my coffee, swallowed that small lump, and forced my brain to focus on the case.
Before I could shift the conversation back to the case, my phone beeped with a text.
It was from Lo.
I need you right now!
Chapter Fifty-Six
I texted Lo back that I was on my way home.
I hurried from the cafe to my car and drove as fast as I could back to the apartment.
When I arrived and opened the door, I found Lo at the dining room table and Miss Kesslier standing nearby, rubbing Lo’s back, looking at me with a somber face.
“What?” I asked.
Miss Kesslier came toward me and paused before passing me.
“She’s just feeling it all at once,” she whispered to me. “I tried to calm her but she insisted on seeing you. She’ll be okay, Allie. It’s just a big shock still. I’m going to show myself out for a bit.”
“Thank you,” I whispered to Miss Kesslier.
I walked toward the table and Lo jumped up.
“Lo…”
“No,” she growled at me. Rage filled her eyes. “No. I don’t want to hear a thing from you.”
“From me? You texted me to come home.”
“I shouldn’t have done that,” Lo said. “This is your fault. You ruined my life again.”
“Lo, take a deep breath…”
“Why aren’t they out there?” Lo asked. “Why aren’t the police out there working to find Steph? Huh? What about you? What have you been doing all day? What were you doing when I texted you?”
I took a deep breath.
Lo was panicking.
She was boxing herself in and lashing out to exhaust her worries.
I stood my ground and gave her the space she needed to vent.
She stared at me. “Answer me, Allie.”
“I was talking to Ben,” I said. “We were going over the entire case. Including Steph. Before that, I was in a meeting with two other officers. Giving them orders. Before that, I was in Laura’s office. I thought she was going to fire me.”
“Fire you?”
“I talked to Trevor again. To get him to admit what happened. So I could clear his name.”
“Did you?” Lo asked.
“For the most part.”
“That means no,” she said. “I hate when you talk in circles. You sound like my mother when you do that.”
“Lo, I’m sorry for what you’re going through right now…”
“You don’t know a thing,” she snapped. “Why aren’t you out there looking for Steph? Where is she? Tell me where she is.”
“If I could, I would,” I said. “Steph isn’t who we thought. She’s somehow tied to this. She might end up being…” I swallowed hard. Time for the truth. “Lo, she might end up being heavily involved. You can’t get your hopes up that we’re going to find her and she’s going to be innocent. She lied to us.”
“She was scared,” Lo said. “She told me that before. Her home life… it wasn’t good.”
“She never told you her parents’ names or where she lived. Right?”
Lo’s chin quivered. “Who cares? I trusted her.”
“I know you did,” I said. “I’m so sorry for what she’s done. Right now, I need to keep you here and keep you safe. And as much as you hate for me to say this, I need you to stay calm. I’m working hard, Lo. I’m going to get all the answers.”
“When?” Lo asked.
“Soon.”
“That’s another lie.”
“No, it’s not. I don’t know how soon it will be, but it’s soon.”
Lo moved from around the table.
She took two steps and lowered her head.
When she burst into tears, I sighed with relief.
The angry version of the panic was over now.
I hugged her and let her cry into my chest.
She wept hard enough that I felt my eyes fill with tears.
After a few minutes, I inched Lo back and touched her face. My thumbs wiped tears off her cheeks.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered.
“You don’t have to be sorry for anything. I will always protect you, Lo. You may not like what that looks like, and I understand it. Trust me, I do. I had a boyfriend when I was your age and he was the world to me. He wasn’t a good person. I’m not saying Trevor is the same, but right now, you have to stay away. And as far as Steph goes… she lied. She never saw Dr. Jerry.”
“Then why?” Lo asked. “Why me?”
“I have to figure that part out,” I said. “That’s why I wanted you here. With Miss Kesslier. So I can go out there and do everything you want me to do.”
“What if this is really bad, Allie?” Lo asked. “What if something happens to you?”
I shook my head. “I… I can’t promise anything there, Lo. I just have to do my job. I’m smart. I’m tough. The same as you. You’re smart. You’re tough. And when we get hit with pain, we get angry.”
Lo nodded. “Yeah. Exactly. I’m angry.”
“Why don’t you go relax in your room,” I offered. “Put on a movie or some music. Pretend you’re sick. I can bring you something to eat.”
“Okay,” Lo said. “You’re sure this is going to be okay?”
“I’m sure,” I said.
Now that was a lie, but it was one that needed to be told.
I walked Lo to her room and by the time I came back out to the dining room, Miss Kesslier was back.
And she had made tea for us.
“I’m sorry,” she said. “She just wouldn’t stop.”
“You did nothing wrong,” I said. “You’re here. That’s all I could ever ask. This case is getting big. Really big.”
“You can handle it,” Miss Kesslier said. “I know you can handle it.”
My phone beeped with a text.
It wasn’t from Lo this time.
It was from Dr. Jerry.
Or just Jerry.
Any chance I can steal an hour of your time tonight? A drink at my place? Clear your head?
“You’re smiling,” Miss Kesslier said.
“No. I’m… it was Jerry. Dr. Jerry.”
“Ah, right,” Miss Kesslier said.
“He wants me to stop over for a drink.”
“And you want to go?”
“I can’t go,” I said. “Not with Lo upset. Not with this case hanging over my head.”
“Allie,” Miss Kesslier said. “One hour isn’t going to hurt you. Maybe it’s exactly what you need to do. Take an hour. Have a drink with him. Let your mind stop. Ben is working on the case too, right?”
“Yeah,” I said. “Others are also.”
“Okay. Then it’s your turn to take a minute and catch your breath. It’s only fair.”
“I can’t…”
“You can,” Miss Kesslier said. “Lo is calm now. She just wanted to see you.”
“She wanted to attack me.”
“Out of love.”
Jerry sent another text.
Four question marks.
“Just go,” Miss Kesslier said.
“Talk to yourself on the ride there. Then talk to yourself on the ride back. I’m sure something will come to you. Pacing your apartment isn’t going to get much done, is it?”
“You should have been a lawyer,” I said.
Miss Kesslier smiled. “I still like Ben better. But I understand. You do what you have to do.”
“I’m going to work,” I said. “I have to ask Jerry about his building. He said he was going to help…”
“Exactly,” Miss Kesslier said.
I replied to Jerry that I was on my way.
I did a quick check in the mirror in the bathroom to make sure I wasn’t too much of a mess.
It shouldn’t have mattered.
This wasn’t a date.
It was a drink and to talk.
Nothing more.
Either way, I needed a break f
rom the real world for a minute.
Chapter Fifty-Seven
Jerry opened the door to his apartment and he looked like a dream to me.
I didn’t want to admit it but I felt that same rush like the first time I saw Tommy. Only this was the adult version of it.
Tommy had been a bad boy all the way and that made me want him.
With Jerry, it was about his intellect.
And his looks.
There was no shame in admitting that to myself.
He was such a good looking man, and always looked good no matter what.
When he was in his office, he had that professional look.
Now, as he answered his door with his messy hair and dressed down clothes, it was complete comfort.
It was exactly what I needed at the end of a long day.
“I’m sorry to ask to steal some time,” he said right away.
“I’m here,” I said.
“Yes, you are,” he said. “We can talk work for a bit.”
“Mind if I come in first?” I asked.
“Of course,” he said with a laugh. “Sorry. You, uh, you have an effect on me, Allie.”
My cheeks grew warm. “Oh?”
Jerry walked away and I shut the door behind me.
He went to get two glasses of wine.
I lingered near the couch.
His apartment was clean and pristine.
It had a manly smell to it.
Hints of his cologne. Maybe even the soap he used.
I was in detective mode, but for all the wrong reasons.
I stopped looking around the apartment and moved toward the kitchen.
“Did you find anything out about Steph? Leslie?” I asked.
“No,” Jerry said. “I called the landlord. Fred is a good guy. He’s as honest as they come. He said he would look through the footage, but warned me it was just of the parking lot. He admitted he went cheap on anything security since the town is usually so safe. Especially over there. There’s nothing of value.”
“I understand,” I said. “I just can’t believe…”
Jerry handed me a glass of wine.
“I’m sorry,” I said. “I didn’t come here to vent.”
“Yes, you did,” he said. “So vent.”
“I just can’t believe what’s happening,” I said. “I can’t tell you everything… I don’t want to waste your time. But this Steph-slash-Leslie thing is bothering me.”
