by Mark Carver
Mindy frowned, confused. “So what happened? Were you in an accident?”
Cameron’s shoulders heaved once and he sighed silently. There was going to be no easy way to do this. Better get it done all at once.
He turned around.
Mindy gasped and her hands flew to her mouth. Her eyes were so wide, they looked like they might fall out of her head. She took a step backwards, and Cameron felt terrible.
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you earlier,” he said, holding out his hands as if asking for her forgiveness. He instantly became mad at himself. Why did he have to be such a wimp?
Mindy could only stare at him in disbelief. After a few moments, she found her voice and stammered, “Cameron, you...why...why did you do that to your face?”
Cameron shrugged, his irritation deepening. She wasn’t his wife or mother. He didn't need to explain himself to her.
“I wanted to do something different.”
Mindy blinked rapidly as a gust of wind blew smoke in her eyes. “But...but you looked so handsome before...”
Cameron’s face darkened. “Listen, it’s my face, and I can do what I want with it.”
Mindy sensed the bristling tone in his voice and she held up her hands in supplication. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to say you were...I mean, it’s such a big change...”
Her hands fell at her sides. “Cameron, why did you tattoo your face?”
Cameron turned away. His face felt as hot as fire.
“It’s my life,” he said defensively, as if to convince himself more than her. “I was tired of being the same old person.”
Mindy walked towards him slowly and reached out to touch his face. He flinched and turned away, but the softness of her touch quickly melted his wall of ice. She used her hand to turn his face towards her and she looked at him with gentle eyes.
“Don’t be mad,” she said quietly. “I’m sorry I was so rude; I just didn’t know how to react. You have to admit that it’s a pretty big shock to come to your neighbor’s barbecue and find out he has a huge tattoo on his face.”
Cameron tried not to get infected by her smile, but he failed. He wished the tattoo was done healing, and he was sure he looked pretty disgusting. About half of the tattoo scabs had fallen off, and the fresh skin beneath was shiny and taut. He imagined he looked like a burn victim.
Mindy glanced towards the smoking grill. “Meat’s probably done.”
Cameron flinched, then turned and quickly swiped the sizzling steaks from the grill. The savory smells were irresistible, and Mindy’s mouth began to water.
“So where do we set up shop?”
Cameron grimaced slightly, chastising himself for not having any backyard furniture.
“The dining room,” he said, a little bit glumly.
But Mindy didn’t seem to mind at all. With a smile and a nod, she headed towards the house, and Cameron followed her with a plateful of steaks in his hand. He really liked the way the dress fluttered playfully over her legs, like it wanted to fly up...
“Did it hurt?” she asked, looking over her shoulder as she walked.
Cameron nearly dropped the plate. His face flushed and he hoped she hadn’t noticed him staring.
“Yeah,” he said after he cleared his throat. “Pretty bad, actually. But only for a couple hours.”
Mindy winced and sucked in her breath through her teeth. “I went with my cousin to give her moral support for her tattoo. The sound of needles drove me crazy, like demon mosquitoes in your ear or something.”
Cameron chuckled. “Demon mosquitoes? Well, when you put it that way, that’s pretty much how it felt, like demon mosquitoes buzzing underneath my skin.”
She shook her head, still in disbelief. “You’re an interesting man, Cameron. I thought I was starting to figure you out, but here you go and toss another mystery into the mix.”
Her eyes narrowed and she looked at him like he was some kind of foreign language.
Cameron coughed to disguise his discomfort. “We should get inside before the bears get attracted to the smell.”
Mindy’s eyes widened. “What? There are bears around here?”
Cameron stared at her for a moment. “Yeah. California surfer bears.”
“Don’t tease me,” Mindy scolded, giving his arm a firm poke.
Cameron laughed, and they headed inside together.
****
He could still see her beaming sunshine smile and hear her light, airy laugh after he stepped out of the shower, having washed away the charcoal smoke from the barbecue. Even as he wiped the steam from the mirror and leaned forward to peer closely at his tattoo, he remembered how the setting sun reflected over her astonishingly glossy blonde hair. And that body...all those hours of jogging and yoga were certainly worth it.
Cameron shook his head once, as if to shake her image loose from his mind. He gazed carefully at the tattoo in the water-streaked mirror, and he was pleased with how it was turning out. No splotchy areas, and the outline was holding together well. He had noticed how Mindy’s eyes would drift almost imperceptibly towards the tattoo during their dinner conversation. He had tried to read her face, looking for disgust, curiosity, contempt. But he couldn’t draw a bead on what she was thinking. She made several remarks about it, and it was pretty clear that she was curious, but it still didn’t explain what she thought about him.
He didn’t even know what he thought about himself.
He raised his fingers and gently touched the bold yet simple design permanently etched onto his face.
What have you done?
****
“Hello?”
“Toby? It’s Cameron.”
“Cam! What’s going on, brother? I’ve been waiting for you to send me those sketches so I can get you compensated by – "
“Listen Toby, forget about that. I don’t want anything from them.”
“What? Why not? You okay, man? You sound a little...different.”
“I...something is different. I want to talk to you about some things. You free anytime soon?”
“Yeah, yeah, I had a client cancel on me for lunch tomorrow. How about one o’clock at the usual place?”
“Sure. Sounds good. See you then.”
“You’re not in trouble or anything, are you?”
“No, Toby. I’m good. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
****
The waitress glanced up as she heard footsteps.
“Table for…”
Her words vanished. She could only stare.
Cameron spoke quietly, his voice steady and a little cold.
“My friend is already here.”
The waitress swallowed roughly and looked behind her. “Um…is he…?”
Cameron moved past her without waiting for her to finish. He marched towards the table where Toby hovered over a plate of pasta.
The chair scraped on the wooden floor as Cameron moved it back, and Toby looked up.
“Cameron! Hey bud…”
Like the waitress, his words died in his throat. His eyes grew wider and wider and didn’t seem to stop.
Cameron sat down heavily. “Come on Toby, this is California. Land of the freaks, home of the bizarre.”
Toby’s fork fell from his fingers. “Cam…what did you do?”
Cameron was starting to get pissed off. It wasn’t just Toby or the waitress; it was everyone. He hadn’t been out in public much since it wasn’t completely healed yet, but everyone who saw him looked at him as if he was an escaped convict or something. And he was right: this was California, not Amish country.
“I wanted to make a change,” he said flatly.
“A change? Dude, dye your hair a different color. Remodel your kitchen. Don’t tattoo your face!”
“And why not?” Cameron snapped. He knew Toby would be surprised, but he expected a bit more of an open mind from a guy who schmoozed with crazy Hollywood types all day and night. “I’m just taking what’s on the inside and putting it out there for eve
ryone to see.”
Toby’s eyes narrowed and he studied Cameron’s face carefully. “Are you trying to get noticed? This is about Sh – "
“No!” Cameron smacked the table, causing Toby’s fork to jump on the plate. “I did this for me. I was tired of living the same old life, being the same old guy, and this is my way of giving me the jump-start I need.”
Toby sat back, steepling his fingers like a sage. “Well, I have to say it’s pretty badass. You’ve definitely got the whole Viking warrior thing down.”
Cameron glanced at the waitress who was trying to hide her curiosity as she pretended to arrange a stack of menus. He looked back at Toby and sighed.
“It was a bit impulsive, and I’m still not sure how I feel about it.”
“Well it’s a little too late for remorse,” Toby said with a mirthless chuckle.
“I know, and that’s what I tell myself.” He leaned forward, a serious look on his face. “And that’s why I wanted to talk to you.”
Toby’s cocked his right eyebrow. “Oh?”
“I didn’t just want to get a tattoo on my face. There are a million pictures on Facebook of people completely covered. But there’s no one with a face like mine in the fantasy weapons business. I want to stand out from the rest of the herd.”
A hungry look spread across Toby’s face. “You mean you want an image makeover?”
Cameron nodded. “You know people. Publicists, people like that. I’m good at what I do, but I don’t know how to sell it. How to sell myself.”
Toby opened his mouth, but Cameron interrupted.
“No hooker jokes.”
Toby’s mouth snapped shut and he smiled sheepishly. Then his expression changed. “Well, you’re certainly thinking in the right direction. Branding and image is what it takes these days. A good product will only get you so far. I hate to bring it up, but Shane Calhoun’s visibility is what landed him the Ravenblade gig.”
“I know. And I want to do the same thing, only better. Having a tattoo on my face doesn’t make me a better weapons maker, but it certainly makes me stand out.”
Toby nodded slowly. “You have learned well, grasshopper.”
His eyes narrowed until they were almost closed, as he seemed to be looking through Cameron rather than at him. Cameron waited patiently – Toby always did this when he was thinking, and it usually meant something good.
After a few moments, Toby’s face brightened again. He grinned wolfishly. “I know just the guy. Or gal, actually. She knows all the right people.”
He paused, then shook his head slightly as if in a daze. “I can’t believe you went and tattooed your face…”
Cameron sighed with exasperation. He looked over at the waitress again. This time she smiled at him and her eyes sparkled. Cameron frowned, then threw a small smile back. She held his gaze for a moment, then let her eyes fall to her clipboard.
“See?” Toby broke in, a mischievous grin plastered across his face. “It’s starting already.”
“What is?”
Toby laughed heartily and jabbed his fork into the tangle of noodles on his plate.
“You’ll see.”
****
As Cameron guided the Ducati into the driveway, he saw Mindy sprinkling water on her flourishing geraniums, standing over them like a proud mother. He waved at her and she waved back, then set the water can on the ground and walked towards him.
He didn’t know why, but he wished she didn’t.
“Hey stranger,” she called out, wiping her forehead with her gardening gloves.
“Hey,” Cameron replied. He wanted to leave his helmet on, but he knew it would be awkward. He pulled the helmet off of his head and Mindy leaned closer.
“Hmm,” she said with an approving nod. “Looks better than before. Pretty much healed.”
Cameron resisted the urge to cover his cheek with his hand. “Yeah. It feels fine now. A little itchy, but that’s normal.”
Mindy leered at him. “Do people freak out when they see you?”
Cameron closed his eyes for a moment. Seriously…is this how it’s always going to be?
“A little bit,” he answered, “but this is California. There are lots of strange types everywhere, especially the closer you get to LA.”
Mindy looked around and wrinkled her brow. “But South Pasadena is as Mom-and-Pop, true-blue apple pie America as you can get. You’ll stand out like a sore thumb.”
Cameron rubbed his temple, commanding the blossoming headache to get lost.
“Yeah, probably. Mindy, I’ve had a pretty long day, and I need to wash the road off me, so…”
“You need some help?”
Cameron’s eyebrows flew up. “Excuse me?”
“Standing out like a sore thumb.”
“Oh,” Cameron mumbled, letting his shoulders relax. Then he frowned. “What do you mean?”
Mindy cocked her hips and blew a golden strand of hair out of her eyes. “Well it’s pretty obvious that you’re trying to make yourself more visible, and I thought you might be doing it to get more exposure for your work.”
The back of Cameron’s neck felt itchy. “Yeah, well, um, that’s…kind of…”
“I can help you.”
“You can? How?”
“I know some PR people at the gym. They call themselves ‘personal branding experts’ or something like that. Basically everybody’s a brand in their eyes, and they keep pestering everyone to ‘maximize their brand potential.’ It sounds lame but I googled it and it’s a pretty hot thing. If you’re wanting to put yourself more out there, so to speak, you should talk to these guys.”
Cameron turned the helmet over in his hands. “Thanks Mindy, but I’ve already started talking to someone about…that kind of stuff. And all this..." He gestured towards the tattoo. “...isn’t for attention.”
“Oh? Why did you get it?”
Cameron’s eyes fell away from hers. “It’s complicated…”
Mindy nodded slowly. “I guess something that serious would have to be. Not like an ‘I’m drunk on Spring Break and I’m going to get a tattoo’ kind of thing.”
“No. Definitely not.”
Mindy inhaled deeply. “Okay, well I’ll let you go so you can grab that shower.”
Cameron nodded and he watched her walk back to her flowers. Then she turned around and he hastily flung his gaze in another direction. Why did she keep doing that?
“If you want to hang out again sometime, I’m free this weekend,” she said.
“Okay. Sure, I’ll let you know.”
She smiled, then scooped up the water can and disappeared into her house.
Cameron sat on his motorcycle in the driveway, looking down at his reflection in the helmet visor. He was starting to get used to the new face he wore, but he didn’t like how he felt around Mindy. Like he was embarrassed or something. And even worse, she didn’t seem to care at all now. She looked at him with the same bright eyes and warm smile as before. It’s like he was still the same person to her.
You are the same person.
A shadow passed over his face.
No, I’m not.
CHAPTER 10
The first thing Cameron noticed about Robyn Chu was that she was wearing a turtleneck sweater and full-length calico skirt in the middle of June. He found himself thinking that was a shame, because she seemed to have a killer body. Her name indicated that she was Chinese but she seemed to have some other ethnicity sprinkled in, though he couldn’t figure out what. Persian, or maybe Arabic. She looked gentle and severe at the same time with her narrow glasses and hair pulled back in a perfect bun. He chuckled to himself, thinking that she looked like the hot schoolteacher that he and his high school buddies used to fantasize about.
Robyn stared at Cameron like a disapproving mother. She tossed a glance at Toby standing by her side and sighed loudly, intending for Cameron to hear. Toby looked at her meekly and shrugged her shoulders.
“This isn’t what I do,” Robyn
said, sounding a bit annoyed.
“Come on,” Toby said, “remember when you worked your magic with that weight-loss guru after she gained a hundred pounds? Anything you touch turns to gold.”
Robyn’s hand flew up in front of Toby’s face. “Spare me the flattery.”
She looked again at Cameron, glaring at him from behind her designer lenses. She huffed again and bared her teeth in what could have been a smile.
“Mr. McConnell is it?”
Cameron nodded.
“Let’s sit down,” Robyn said, motioning towards a cluster of overstuffed furniture. The three of them sat down, and Cameron couldn’t help but be impressed. The lobby of the building looked like an art gallery. A pulsating fiberglass sculpture of a nude woman hovered above them, and an assortment of highly-polished metalworks were scattered among the exotic plants and comfortable modern furniture.
“Cameron,” Robyn began without asking if she could address him by his first name, “Toby tells me that you make weapons.”
“Yes…ma’am,” Cameron said, throwing the formality in there just to be safe, though he noticed from Robyn’s expression that it was pointless. “I make fantasy weapons for collectors.”
“And the movies,” Toby broke in. “You remember the one last summer with – "
Robyn’s hand silenced Toby again and she looked into Cameron’s eyes. He realized that she had never let her gaze linger on his tattoo for more than half a second.
“Cameron, what is it exactly that you would like for me to do for you?”
Her tone made it very apparent that she was doing him a huge favor, but Cameron didn’t back down. “I am very good at what I do," he said, "but I’m not naive. I know that image is a big factor in success or failure, especially in an industry like mine where aesthetics are so important.”
She cocked an immaculate eyebrow and a small, almost mocking smile spread across her lips. “So you got a tattoo on your face so all the nerds and fanboys would think you were cool?”
Cameron stared at her for a moment, unable to speak. He almost got up and left that instant but Toby quickly spoke up.
“Robyn, Cameron’s a player, and the fantasy weapons business is huge. All he needs is a little nudge in the right direction, maybe some help throwing together a website, and that’s it. And come on,” he said as he gestured expansively towards Cameron, “you have to admit that he’s an eye catcher.”
Cameron thought he caught a twinkle in her eye behind her glasses as she said, “Yes he is.”
