by Hazel Parker
He plundered. That was the only word I could think of before thought became impossible as my mind grew blank and all that was left were feelings—too many intense feelings that consumed me.
I could feel his body tightening bit by bit, feel the hardness of it grow even harder. Most of all, I could feel something else harden, pulsing against my stomach and making me want to press against him.
I wanted to touch it.
His big hand came up, sliding just below my breast and making it tighten. I realized that this man I was kissing was my biggest weakness—the one who would eventually make me forget about my purpose here, about my goal to provide Kyle a better life. But at this moment, none of that mattered as my body went weak and my blood pounded hotly, and all I wanted was to have him touch me for a long, long time.
His other hand slid down my dress, touching my thigh and making me moan again. An answering rumble came from him, and I reached out and touched his hair to pull him even closer. Hands flew as he unzipped my dress exposing my corset and exposing my heaving cleavage. He pulled my corset down freeing an aching breasts to the air before he slid his kisses down and latched onto the tingling point.
Heat rose, and my body reveled in the pleasure of it. It was too hot, and I was in heaven from that scorching mouth.
He pulled me up, spreading my legs, then ground his clothed erection against my center, and I cried as something inside me went close to exploding. I called out his name, over and over, wanting more. Wanting everything.
Lucas froze.
Then he was pulling away and breaking the kiss, then breaking every other contact between us.
I stood there, opening my eyes when I realized that I’d closed them. He was breathing hard, and so was I. His dress shirt was unbuttoned, and I could see the glimpse of a hard chest, with a few wisps of hair on his navel trailing down inside his pants. His bulge was there, tight and huge: proof of his desire.
But his blue eyes had turned cold again.
“I’m sorry,” he croaked out. “We can’t do this. There’s…there’s too much on the line.”
Then he was walking away, passing by me as he slipped out the door and shut it with a quiet click.
I stared at the table, stared at the chairs, trying to gather my own breath as I tried to put myself back together. My hands shook as I slid my corset and dress back in place, as flashes of his mouth on my breast bombarded me and had me throbbing all over again. The urge to cry was real, but I fought against it, fought against every instinct to slide on the floor and let the tears fall. The ache in my chest tightened again, and I knew it wasn’t going to go away anytime soon.
Maybe Lucas wouldn’t hurt me physically.
But my heart certainly wasn’t safe with him.
* * *
It was all I could do to go back to the hall, where I found Lucas with the queen and acting like nothing had happened at all. He didn’t even look my way. I forced myself to smile and mingle again, but I must not have been doing a very good job because Ana pulled me aside.
“Is everything okay? You’ve been very pale since you got back. Prince Lucas looked shaken, too. Did…did something happen to your father?”
I couldn’t find any other excuse, so I latched on to that. “He’s been very sick. That was my family emergency.”
“Oh. I’m so sorry.”
“Me, too. Can you excuse me, Ana? I think I’m going to turn in for the night.”
“But…you’re not waiting for the crown prince to return?” She seemed scandalized.
“I’m sure he’d understand,” I responded weakly.
Ana made concerned noises, but I mostly ignored her and slipped out of there as fast as I could. When I was a few meters away from the hall entrance, I removed my heels and ran for it, not even caring if any of the staff saw me. I only got to walking when I got to the north wing, where I heard sounds of groaning—familiar sounds.
Quietly, I peeked inside one of the open rooms, wondering if someone was hurt or sick. The room was dim, but my eyes adjust quickly enough for them to widen as I took in the sight.
It was Darla—her eyes closed, her mouth open as tiny moans of pleasure came out of it. Someone was grinding against her—no, not grinding, but fucking her hard as her legs spread out in the air. Said someone had his back to the door, his blond hair gleaming and those arms pushing out against the mattress as he pounded into her.
The official royal colors were visible on his broad back, and I’d recognize that body anywhere.
What was Benjamin doing here with Darla, rather than one of the princesses?
It was so odd. It was also slightly disappointing because I remembered Ana and her sincere desire to get to know him—and here he was, busy getting it on for the sake of getting it on. From the sounds of it, they were both enjoying the moment too much to care.
And it looked like it was going to last for a while.
I backed out as quietly as I could, careful with my footsteps. Then I walked away, knowing I had no right to dictate their choices. But I didn’t want to be a part of it, either, and maybe I’d end up mentioning it to either of them if the time came. Maybe.
For now, it was none of my business.
Since I had a fake identity, I was also given a fake room. I slid inside and locked the door, then squinted through the darkness. I breathed a sigh of relief when I saw Kyle’s brown hair and his sleeping form on the huge bed.
My dress was already starting to itch despite the soft material, and the need to get in more comfortable clothes was strong. But I set it aside and sat beside my brother instead, watching the steady flow of his breathing and feeling it relaxing me. While the events and emotions of the day didn’t entirely vanish, it slid off enough to make the tension coil out of my shoulders and make my heart ease into a steady rhythm.
Kyle turned to the side, mumbling under his breath. Amusement slid through me because I’d never heard him sleep-talk before, and it looked like his mouth was forming coherent words.
“Mons…Mons…ters…”
Monsters?
He frowned, then opened his mouth in a silent scream. Kyle thrashed twice, startling me before he turned back around and settled into a deep sleep. The word was mumbled once more, then twice, before he fell silent.
I stared for a long time, worrying. But he remained silent, and I wondered if he was just having a nightmare. With a sigh, I kissed his forehead.
Then I went to change, ready to ease into bed and sleep the confusing day away.
Chapter 16
LIZ
I thought the accumulation of events that happened, as well as being on high heels the whole night, would have been enough to knock me out. I expected to be out like a light the moment my head hit my pillow, especially considering how soft it was and how warm the blankets were. This was definitely an upgrade from our previous room—and that was saying something, considering our previous room was already a huge step up.
But no matter what I did, no matter how many tossing and turning I subjected myself to, nothing worked. I even got a glass of warm milk to make myself sleepy, but all it did was make me feel full. I realized that with how muddled my thoughts were, staying in bed was just going to eventually drive me insane.
So I tossed back the sheets. As quietly as I could, I slid out of bed, careful not to wake Kyle up. He was still sound asleep and hadn’t spoken since then, and that was enough assurance for me as I slid out of the room.
The hall was quiet, and I knew for sure the princesses were already in their rooms, fast asleep. My exit had been hours ago, and I couldn’t believe I spent all that time thinking too much in bed when I should be doing something productive. Often, walking made me productive, and I did that now, removing myself from the vicinity right away so no one would spot me. Then I wandered the emptier halls, keeping in the dark and trying to piece together whatever information I gathered from the ball.
I had talked to all the twelve princesses, and everyone’s story sounded
plausible at first glance. Perhaps the only one I would eliminate from my suspect list was Ana because of how kind and open she was—but then again, her obvious interest in Benjamin raised some suspicion in itself, which meant she still wasn’t going to be crossed off.
The Russian princess was high on the alert list, mostly because she was quiet and kept observing me. I still needed to get myself acquainted with her to see why she was here—as far as I knew, Russian princesses were wealthy and liked marrying into bigger royal families, not small ones like this royal family in Osmerol.
I made a list in my mind, deciding to write them down later for further analyzing. I was big on lists and this was something to do, since other than pretending, I wasn’t allowed to do any housekeeping for now.
Rounding the corner towards another hallway, my footsteps halted when I heard another pair—heavier ones, almost like the person didn’t care about being heard. I paused for a bit, almost about to take a step back and turn around. But I took the risk, peeking to see if it was one of the princesses out at night.
The familiar figure had my eyes widening. Lucas was walking unsteadily, a bottle in hand and his eyes partially closed. When he swayed on the spot, I knew I should have just retreated and left him be.
Instead, I found myself walking forward and catching him before he could stumble completely.
I snatched the bottle from his hand and gritted my teeth at his weight, even though only half of it was on me. Lucas blinked, then stared at me blearily.
“Liz?”
“This is really unbecoming of you, Lucas,” I muttered.
“That’s Prince…Lucas…”
“Lucas,” I interrupted. I hoisted his arm on my shoulder and glared up at him, willing him to cooperate. “Now come on. Let’s get you to your room before your mother sees you.”
“Stepmother,” he corrected.
“Stop talking,” I hissed.
“Sassy.”
I almost laughed at that but stifled it and focused on walking with him one step at a time. It was a good thing his room wasn’t that far away because I didn’t think I could carry his weight any longer. Lucas kept mumbling, and I cocked my ears even while I kept hissing at him to be quiet. It didn’t bode well for both of us to be seen like this because it would get us in trouble.
It would definitely get me in trouble.
“You’re really pretty, Liz…”
“I know. Stop talking.”
“And I know you want me…”
“Untrue. Try again.”
“Spoilsport.”
“Jerk.”
The relief was huge when we reached his room, but it was another thing altogether trying to navigate the mess of bottles on the floor. Worry slid in at the thought that he just kept drinking after what happened to us in the meeting room, and that worry was what pushed me to hasten my movements as I brought him to the edge of the bed.
“You need to get in bed, Lucas. Do you hear me?”
“I hear you.”
“I’ll smack you if you fight me.”
“You’re nasty.”
“I am,” I agreed. “Now, on three. One, two—oof!”
My last word came out as a squeak as instead of toppling him over to the bed, I got pulled with him. It happened too fast that I couldn’t have prevented it if I tried—and before I knew it, I was lying on my back and his weight was holding me down.
His very dead weight.
I pushed him off, but only got a nuzzling on my neck as he kept still. My breath caught in my throat at his warm mouth so near, even while I babbled and tried to get him off me.
“Get off me.”
“Only if you…say please…”
I paused, then eyed him balefully. “Please?”
He nuzzled my neck again, and I gasped. “That tickles!”
“Sorry…”
“Work with me, Lucas. Come on now.”
“You want a workout?”
“I didn’t say—oh, my God!” Suddenly his weight was gone, and I was rolled to the top, straddling him. His hands encircled my wrist, and I tried to tug them off. “Lucas, you are so dead—”
“I’ll give you a workout…”
His hold firmed.
Then he pulled my head down and met it halfway for a hard, searing kiss.
Just like earlier, I didn’t struggle—I couldn’t have, not with the power that kiss held over me. I could taste the alcohol on him, could taste the warmth of his breath that I just felt earlier. I could feel his tongue as it slid inside me, as potent as the hand that was sliding under my shirt now.
And I gave. I kissed him back and I gave, drowning in his taste and wanting more.
The kiss eventually turned slow. Intimate. His mouth explored mine, his tongue teasing softly until I was writhing in desperation. His hand closed over my breast, sliding my bra down and rubbing his thumb over my nipple until it became one distended bud of pleasure. I moaned and rubbed my body against his, a sound he swallowed hungrily as he took me to new heights and brought the kiss deeper, seeking something but not knowing what it was.
It turned even slower—then, even more until Lucas stopped moving altogether. Belatedly, realization came rushing at me that he was sound asleep, and the soft snore that followed only cemented that.
Embarrassment slid in, followed by mortification. I pushed off him and rushed to arrange myself, then jumped when something pulsed against my core. His erection was still there, and the thought that I was shamelessly grinding against it had my cheeks heating up. I scrambled off his lap, trying to compose myself.
Then I glared at his sleeping form.
About to leave, I took the first step towards the door. But his mumbling voice stopped me, and the familiarity of the word he uttered had me stopping.
“Monster…monster…”
Kyle’s own mumbling flashed in mind, and I was abruptly turning around again and climbing beside Lucas. I leaned forward to hear better, waiting as silence filled the room for a while.
“Liz…”
“Yes?”
“I’m…”
“Yes?”
“I’m…a monster…”
The words, said so gravely, sent a chill down my spine. Goosebumps covered my skin as he repeated it, as a tortured sound escaped his lips. Something surged inside me, tightening my chest. I had to consciously stabilize my breathing to fight it. Then I was urging Lucas to move again until he was right in the center of his bed.
“It hurts…monster…”
The words were sincere, the pain in them raw. Realizing I couldn’t leave him even if I tried, I got into action, getting a basin and wet towel and placing it on his bedside table. Then I started stripping him off his clothes, stopping at his trousers. His body was hot all over, but I could feel some shaking underneath.
“Liz…I’m a monster…”
“You’re not,” I whispered. “Shhh. Stay still. I’ll take care of you.”
The words settled him down for a bit, and I took that opportunity to wipe his upper half and his face. He was soon deep in sleep, breathing softly and evenly. I didn’t want to disturb him, but I was already here, and I might as well wash up whatever I could.
Pushing with both hands, I managed to get him positioned sideways, with my towel ready to wipe. It dropped on the bed when I finally got a good look at what I was seeing.
His back was filled with scars—brown welts that inter-crossed in no particular direction, injuries that didn’t heal properly and now protruded over his skin. Without thinking, I gingerly touched them with my fingers, but his sleep remained unbothered, even while I pressed.
Tears started to form in my eyes, but I blinked them back and tried to concentrate on the task. Then I urged him to lie on his back again, watching as he breathed one painful breath before sleeping peacefully.
“What happened to you, Lucas?”
My question went unanswered, of course. It only added further questions, muddling my brain a little more until thi
nking straight was no longer possible.
Knowing I wasn’t going to get any answers tonight, I covered Lucas with blankets and climbed out of bed, even though I was tempted to do the exact opposite. I picked up the bottles and put them all in the trash can.
“Liz…stay…”
His words had me freezing.
I looked up and found his eyes half-open, staring at me. They were unfocused, but his hand reached out, almost a pleading gesture.
“Lucas…”
“Monsters…I’ll protect you…”
His hand went back down, and my heart flipped. Before I could overthink it, I was walking over to him and climbing back in, gingerly lying down on the space he left for me. He pulled me in with strong arms, and the warmth of his chest against my back was perhaps the most comforting thing I felt in the world—and the most sensation-provoking.
My heart quickened, and my belly throbbed with liquid pulls of electricity. But as minutes passed by and he breathed easier, my body relaxed too, and I felt the first stirrings of sleep try to take me.
I didn’t know what was going on, but I did know one thing: my instinct to protect Lucas was all too real, and it was the second scariest feeling in the world.
And the scariest was the thought of how I was falling too deep.
Chapter 17
LUCAS
The days became a blur of responsibilities and priorities and handling them all with ease and calm took a little more energy than usual. Thankfully, Benjamin was back to his usual relaxed and mannered self, keeping my worries at bay.
For now.
It didn't distract me from what I was supposed to do, though, and that thought snapped in my mind over and over from day one until the day I strode over to Liz's bedroom and knocked sharply.
Her soft footsteps padded over the floor before the door was opened, and she greeted me with a demure but pleasant smile. The smile froze when she stared at me, and my heart lurched at the thought that she had that reaction at seeing me.
It was my fault, of course. So I took the first step and opened my mouth before she could speak.
