“It’s no problem. At all. Anytime. Please, tell Lucy I said hi.” She chewed her lip. “Tell her I’m thinking about her, okay?”
“I will.” Monica smiled, and Ashton noticed how much younger she looked. “She misses you a lot. I wish things could be different; I really do. I liked having her here. I trusted you and everybody else, and she was having a lot of fun. She talked about you all the time. She doesn’t so much anymore because…”
“I understand.” Only she didn’t understand, not even a little, and it hurt thinking Lucy couldn’t have what she wanted and needed all because her father was such an angry man.
What problem could he possibly have with Lucy being around other children, with her growing and building her confidence? Was there more to it than that? The better question was, could Ashton do anything more than what she was doing?
No was the resounding answer. It left her feeling defeated and helpless.
Chapter 17
“I’m sorry I’m late.” Carlos sank into the booth, facing Ashton.
She’d been in his thoughts a lot the last few days, and he’d called her on a whim, hoping she could have lunch with him. It was flirting with danger, but he couldn’t stop thinking about her. It had been nice to talk to someone other than Polly or the guys. A woman who piqued his interest and seemed to draw him like no other he’d ever met.
“You’re only five minutes late.” She smiled. “I won’t hold it against you.”
“It’s rude to keep somebody waiting. I don’t want you to think I’m that kind of guy.” He had a good reason, but he was afraid of telling her the real reason why. Would she think he was weird?
On the way to the diner, he’d stopped by the cemetery to visit his parents’ graves. Something he’d done a lot more often when he’d first taken the role of Polly’s guardian. For some unknown reason, it helped to stop by when he was struggling. Of course, he never got answers, but talking aloud about the problems he was facing seemed to clear his mind and give him peace.
Ashton leaned forward with her arms on the table. “You don’t strike me as a rude person, and I’m sure you had a reason.” Her eyebrows knitted together as her gaze roamed over his face. “Is everything okay?”
“Yeah, everything’s okay.” He picked up the menu, scanning the items. “The burgers here are supposed to be excellent.”
“I’ve heard that too.” She tapped the outside of the menu to get his attention. “And your mouth is saying everything’s okay, but that’s not the vibe I’m getting.”
He lifted his gaze to hers. Man, she was gorgeous, even in a simple sweater and jeans. There was no ignoring her observation either. “Really, everything’s okay. Traffic was just a little heavier than I expected.”
“Okay, no big deal.” She chuckled as she laid the menu out on the table. “Don’t be so hard on yourself.”
He laughed with her. “I may have heard that before.” He sobered, wondering if he should just tell her what had held him up. Maybe she did that too and would appreciate knowing she wasn’t alone.
A waiter came to the table, and once their food was ordered, he picked up a fork, twirling it on the table. “I was visiting my parents.”
Her mouth fell slightly open. “Oh. I see.”
What a way to put a damper on their lunch, but he’d already said it. Too late to turn back now. “I stop by whenever I can, though there’s been more and more time between visits lately. I know they’re not really there, but it feels like the right thing to do. I keep the area clear of weeds and debris. You know, little things. I think my mom would appreciate it—she was always a neat freak. Polly inherited that from her.”
“I’ve noticed she’s very precise about how things should be,” Ashton replied. “I wish I had that discipline, honestly.”
“Me too. I’m more like my dad. A mad rush at the last minute to clean up. It drives Polly crazy.” The tension eased as they talked, and he set the fork down.
“I’d say he was a good man based on you.”
Carlos couldn’t help but feel warm all over. Who wouldn’t? “I try to be. It’s not always easy. Lately, which it seems a bit corny, I’ve been visiting more often. Sometimes I wonder if I’m doing a good enough job with Polly.”
“Actually, I get it.” She lowered her gaze to the table. “When my parents first died and all this money was dumped in my lap, I was so overwhelmed. How to be a good steward and make them proud. To keep their memory alive.”
The temptation to kiss her hit him even harder than the night they’d had dinner together. Having someone who understood the grief and wondering what they should do with the responsibility they’d been given drew him to her like a magnet.
“I have to say, though,” she said, stretching her arm out to cover his hand with hers. “I think they’d love who Polly is. She’s terrific. You’ve done a great job.”
It was a simple gesture and more comforting than she would ever know. “It’s sweet of you to say that. I guess I’ve done the best I could, but it never feels like enough.” He took a deep breath. “I just wonder sometimes if I’m doing everything I can. Am I guiding her in the right direction for her, or am I trying to push her into what I think is right for her? I don’t want to keep her from doing the things she wants to do, but is she old enough to understand what those things might be?”
Nodding, Ashton patted his hand. “Like I said before, you’re too hard on yourself.”
“You say that, but I made a promise to my dad when he named me her guardian in their will that I’d take care of her, never thinking I’d ever have to. Now that I am…” His shoulders sagged. “Sometimes, I just don’t know.”
“I’d say you are,” she replied just above a whisper.
He lifted his gaze to hers. “Am I? When she was younger, it was so much easier. Now that she’s older, I worry all the time that I’m falling short.”
It was like a dam breaking. All the things he’d been carrying, the worry and fear. They were pouring out of him with such force that he wasn’t sure he could stop them. And for some reason, the woman sitting across from him seemed like someone who would understand.
Chapter 18
Could Carlos be any more perfect?
“The fact that you worry whether you’re doing your best…” Pulling her hand back, Ashton paused as the waiter stopped at the table with their food. As soon as he was gone, she continued, “You’ve done a great job, and Polly is the proof.”
He ate a fry and quickly pushed his plate back and blew air on his fingers. “Wow. Hot.” He laughed and took a drink of his soda. “I just wish sometimes I had a confirmation from my parents. A little something to know that they’d approve.”
“Carlos, what I’ve learned since starting Brothers and Sisters is that you can only do your best. That’s the same for any parent or guardian. I’m sure your parents felt the same way when they were raising you, and my parents felt the same about me.” She shrugged, picking up the smallest fry and popping it into her mouth.
“Maybe.” The light in his eyes seemed to grow a little brighter.
“Not maybe. Fact. Polly is well-adjusted, responsible, kind, and caring. Right there, that tells me you’ve done an awesome job with her. She could’ve gone another way, become bitter and angry at the world. She didn’t. She has a heart as big as anybody I know.”
“That gives me a bit of peace. That you see that in her.”
“She’s amazing. Like her brother.” Ashton grinned.
Shaking his head, Carlos chuckled. “Now, I wouldn’t go that far.”
Oh, he was. “I would.”
Lowering his gaze, it seemed he was trying to hide the blush creeping up his neck and into his cheeks. He was so cute. Well, he was cute just about all the time, but especially now.
He lifted his gaze a fraction. “Anyway, now you know why I was running late, and why I sometimes annoy Polly to the point where she either yells her head off or refuses to speak to me.”
“I think
that would be the case with any younger sister. Granted, I don’t know from personal experience, but isn’t contention part of just about every sibling relationship at one time or another?”
Another delicious laugh from him. “You make a good point. I knew I was smart to ask you to lunch.” He took a bite of his burger, his eyes sparkling as his gaze finally met hers.
All she could think was that she wanted to be the reason there was a sparkle in his eyes or that she had the power to take the weight off his shoulders…way longer than just a lunch. She wanted to be someone he trusted with his secrets and his concerns.
Like the night she’d had dinner with him and Polly, lunchtime zipped by, leaving her wishing she could slow it down just to spend another minute with him.
“I better get back,” she sighed, checking the time once they’d left the restaurant. “Another day, another opportunity to break up a fight over who stole whose scrunchie.”
He chuckled. “Remember when life’s conflicts were all that simple?”
“Every little thing seemed like the end of the world,” she said, turning to him once they reached her car. “Of course, grownups can overinflate situations too. They can make a big deal out of something that doesn’t have to cause them nearly so much stress.”
He scratched the back of his neck. “Uh, about what you heard on the phone. I—”
“It’s okay.” She touched his arm. “I really understand.”
“Polly…” Grief mixed with anguish twisted his features. He stepped closer, pulling her into a hug. A small groan escaped as he seemed to breathe her in. “Thank you for lunch and for listening,” he whispered.
Wrapping her arms around him, she pressed her cheek to his chest. “Anytime.”
They stood there, wrapped in each other’s arms, innocent and intimate at the same time. In her mind, this is what a relationship was. Watching the tsunami roar closer and, instead of running, holding on to someone.
Dropping his arms, he stepped back, the chill of his absence immediately hitting her. He smiled. “If you need anything, give me a call. Okay? And stay safe.”
“Same goes for you, mister,” she said, poking him in the stomach, which was all the physical contact she’d allow herself at the moment, especially when she was having visions of throwing her arms around his neck and kissing all his worries away.
Carlos half turned, giving her one last smile. “I’ll see you later.”
She nodded and opened the door. “See you later.”
There’d been no change in their status, but she felt lighter than air. Whatever moment they’d had just now was etched into her relationship must-haves. A man who held her like she was the only person in the world he wanted or needed, and the feeling was mutual.
Chapter 19
The sound of a motorcycle engine wasn’t exactly familiar. Yes, people cruised around Baker Beach on them sometimes, but they typically didn’t make a habit of it, and they most definitely didn’t park in front of the firehouse.
Carlos was hosing down the truck Sunday morning when they arrived. Three of them, with a familiar man in the middle.
“What are they doing here?” Bryan asked, turning off the hose.
“Beats me,” Carlos replied.
Only Duke climbed off, with the other two sitting and waiting. Keeping a lookout maybe? Sending a silent message that they had Duke’s back if anything came of this? As if anything would. This was where Carlos worked. He wouldn’t do anything to jeopardize a job he loved.
“You want a little help?” Bryan asked under his breath as Duke walked up the drive, taking off his sunglasses as he did.
“No—you should go inside. For now, I’ll consider it a friendly conversation. If I need help, I’ll call.”
Clearly, Bryan didn’t agree with this approach and hesitated a beat before leaving the bay. Carlos wasn’t sure he agreed with it either, but he didn’t want Bryan pulled into whatever might happen.
“I heard you were a firefighter.” Duke approached the bay as he stuck his hands in his pockets.
“You heard correctly,” Carlos replied, letting the hose drop to the floor.
A smile lifted one corner of the man’s lips. “I always wanted to be a fireman when I was a kid,” Duke said, his gaze roaming over the truck. “I used to love walking by the firehouse—this firehouse, actually—and looking at the truck when the bay doors were open. So shiny and huge, you know? To a kid, it was just about the biggest and loudest thing in the world.”
“I felt the same way.” Carlos smiled at the memory. He’d known from an early age what he’d wanted to do with his life. “I was obsessed as a kid. The first one in line to come in when they’d have an open house.”
“Huh. Maybe we ran into each other during those.” Duke’s gaze settled on Carlos.
“Maybe we did. Life’s funny that way.” Carlos took a deep breath. “Is there something else you came here for? Or were you in the mood to relive old memories?”
“My old lady doesn’t think I know, but I saw her come out of that Brothers and Sisters place on Wednesday. I thought I’d come by and make sure we had an understanding. My kid is mine, and you got no business telling me how to handle my kid. I just want to make that clear.”
“I don’t remember telling you how to handle your kid,” Carlos muttered. “All I remember was coming by to let Lucy’s parents know she’d hidden to keep from coming home. At the time, we didn’t know she’d been told to stay with a friend.”
“You know how kids are.” Duke shrugged.
“Yeah. I do. I’ve raised my sister since our parents died.”
“Then you know what it’s like!” His eyes lit up. “Sometimes they leave out important details. They make it seem like they’re afraid to go home because things are bad there, when what was the truth? We were having a party and knew it was no good for her to be there. I mean, you saw it.” He chuckled, stroking his beard. “It wasn’t a place for kids.”
Nodding, Carlos had to bite back what he wanted to say. “I get it, but in my defense, she seemed genuinely scared. From the way I saw it, she was a little girl in trouble. You need to see it from my point of view.”
“I don’t need to do anything.” Duke crossed his arms over his chest. “I’m telling you the way it is, and now I’m telling you to mind your own business. You and that mouthy woman of yours.”
Carlos blinked. “I’m sorry, what?”
“You heard me. She’s got a big mouth on her, and she needs to stay away from my place. It’s gonna get her into trouble one of these days if she’s not careful.”
Blinking, Carlos was taken aback for a second. Why was this man coming at him? There was nothing going on between him and Ashton to even suggest that he had a say in her actions. He’d hugged her the day before, but that was it, though it was a lot less than what he’d really wanted to do. Holding her, breathing her in…it helped him more than she’d ever know.
“Okay, for one thing, she’s not my woman, so it’s not my place to tell her what to do. For another, it’s not wise to threaten people when you’re probably still on parole. Or am I wrong?”
Duke took a step back. “Just remember what I said. Keep that woman away from my property.”
Away from his property. From what Carlos knew, Ashton had made a single visit to check on Lucy. He’d thought this guy was bad news, but now the feeling he got was that Duke was dangerous. It made Carlos wonder if there was more than Lucy at the core. He’d just gotten out of prison. Was there a chance he was doing something that could get him sent back?
Duke began walking backward. “Keep her away from me and mine.”
“Why don’t you try riding around without a pair of guys with you if you’re such a tough man?” Carlos called out, grinning. “Or are you afraid to face your problems on your own?”
“That’s the thing.” Duke mounted his bike, sliding his sunglasses into place. “You’re not a problem. You’re about the furthest thing from a problem I can imagine.”
All three men laughed together, shaking their heads and throwing looks of disgust his way as they started up their engines. It was a relief when they rolled away, out of sight.
“That wasn’t exactly promising.”
Carlos whirled around, surprised to find Gregg hovering near the rear of the truck. “I didn’t know you were there.”
“I thought I should be, just in case.” He stepped out of the shadows, staring down the road in the direction the bikers had ridden. “Looks like you’ve earned yourself some interesting acquaintances, my friend.”
Yeah, interesting. Not exactly the word he would have used. What had Ashton done to prompt Duke to show up at the station? Whatever it was, Carlos needed to convince her to stop. If not, Polly would be mourning another person she loved.
Chapter 20
Crisp night air sent a chill down Ashton’s spine as she locked up the Brothers and Sisters building. It was well past when she normally left, but that was no surprise—especially at this time of year, when night fell earlier all the time. The holidays were practically around the corner, and as always, parents were busier, working more.
Maybe they’d do something at the building this year. A Thanksgiving meal with the kids and parents. Maybe have a Santa at the center and a small gift exchange or something. It was something to consider. She could send out a letter asking the community for feedback.
The thought of weeding through the feedback, however, exhausted her before she’d even started. Maybe it would end up being more trouble than it was worth. Just one more thing to add to her list of to-dos or to-don’ts.
“Hey, you.”
Whirling around, she smiled at the sound of Carlos’s voice. She’d thought about him nearly nonstop since their lunch on Saturday. If she was honest, part of her was hoping he’d call and ask her to lunch again, but this was more than okay too.
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