by Kade Cook
Once they have their fun swirling around her form, they lose interest and are on their way back to the places between here and there. All except one. It hovers near while Gabrian slips off the amulet and tucks it safely away within the box and the drawer she had found it in.
A wide yawn reminds her that it is late, and that sleep is going to feel really good after the day’s events. So, off to the shower for a quick rinse and then to bed it is. If she knows anything about this world, Gabrian is certain that tomorrow will hold much more of the unexpected so she better get some rest in the hopes of surviving it.
***
The morning light breaking through the window is a soft yellow through her lids, still heavy with sleep, and the need for coffee overrides the desire to remain in bed any longer. The buzzing of her phone on her nightstand jars her sleepy eyes to open. It has been silent as a ghost for weeks. She peeks over at the timekeeper on the wall. 6 AM it mocks.
“Now who in the world would be calling this early?” Gathering the phone, she reads the message. It’s Rachael. She is home and wants her to come over. She has a surprise for her.
“She is home already?” Punching a quick reply to her friend, Gabrian hurries to find her clothes and searches for her keys, then stops, remembering she is not technically allowed to leave the premises. Her eyes rush to the fade in the bedroom wall, and she grins. “Problem solved,” she hums, pulling her clothes on, and strides through the wall. Retrieving the amulet, she pulls it over her neck and wonders if the Shadow Walkers loved their means of instantaneous travel as much as she is starting to love hers.
Appearing just outside Rachael’s apartment door, Gabrian tucks away her Magikal contraption and slides it beneath her shirt. Then, with three light raps on the wooden door, she waits. Light footsteps on the other side grow louder as the click of the lock is undone.
Rachael’s small form pulls open the door, and Gabrian cannot help but shudder at her pale sickly look. Why would they let her out of the hospital in this condition? She looks as if she is half dead.
“Gabrian, you’re here,” she croaks out, pulling the door wide. “Get in here.”
Gabrian forces a smile and walks in, giving her friend a peck on the cheek as she passes. As the door clicks shut, she notices the smell of orange blossoms and the frame of a large man lurking in the frame Rachael’s bedroom doorway. “How are you feeling?” Gabrian asks her, turning back to her friend.
“Wonderful, never been better.” Rachael gives her a wide smile and closes in for a hug, but her face is wrong, smell sickly, like death is hiding under her skin.
Gabrian searches for the shadow in the room again. Orroryn finally steps out into the light. His face is drawn and tired with circles of purple under his eyes but serene just the same. “It is good to see you, Gabrian.”
“You as well, Orroryn.” Gabrian cannot help but feel a tension in the room. Something is off, but she cannot figure out quite what. Orroryn’s eyes leave Gabrian, settling on Rachael, and he disappears from the doorway to appear at her side, an arm draping around her small form. The room is silent. Eerie silent. Gabrian cannot stand the oddness of it. “Okay, so what is this big surprise that you so desperately needed me here for?”
Both Rachael and Orroryn grin, and they point at the space where Orroryn had just been standing. Turning to search the doorway once more, another large form silhouettes the doorframe, only this one makes her pulse stir. The azurite stone lying flush with her skin comes alive with prickles of awareness, and butterflies warm her belly. She knows this shape, this buzz of electricity as the scent of summer fills the room, drowning her heart in its purity. A sea green glow breaches the darkness of the shadows and sets her world to spin.
A boyish grin pulls crookedly at his lip as he steps out into the light. “I missed you,” he breathes out, low and sultry.
Gabrian’s vision blurs, but her body does not wait for her to clear her sight. She bounds across the room and jumps into his open arms. Her muscles burn as she clings to him, refusing to pull away, terrified he will disappear at any moment if she lets go. Burying her head in the crook of his neck, she weeps, missing the song his soul sings to hers, feeling the words of their bond speak their secret language of forever. She wants to live in this space, forever surrounded in what he is, in what they are—two pieces of fate’s puzzle reconnected.
His heartbeat thrums through her ears as her angst slows, the warmth of his flesh against her own coddling her fears, and she finally draws back enough to gaze into the sea of green she has longed to see.
“Gabrian I—” he whispers low and soft, but she covers his words with her full lips, pressing soft with precious sweetness at first until the fire within them both ignites.
Stepping back into the room, Shane closes the door with Gabrian still wrapped tightly around him. Their tongues hunger for more, their hands reach beneath the cloth on their bodies in a fever to search, to explore. Sparks of their passion sting the darkness of the room, and Gabrian growls as her desire for this man grows in it intensity. She cannot see straight, everything shifting in a bounty of colour. Her mouth waters, and her teeth begin to ache. Every inch of her skin buzzes with excitement as the dark room lights with an amber glow. His feverish kisses along her neck cause her to growl again, louder and untamed.
Gabrian pushes hard against Shane’s chest and rolls him over onto his back, perching above him. Her turn to take control. Ripping his shirt off and throwing it to the floor, the curves of his well-maintained muscular torso are bared, and Gabrian’s eyes sharpen, taking in every shadowy bend in his flesh.
She lowers and kisses him, biting his bottom lip, and his approval is given in a low moan. Her bite intensifies as the sweet tang of copper dances over her tongue giving her a stir of elation. Releasing his lip, she hovers over his soft shadowy jaw, nipping along the edge as she goes, and inhales the scent of his earthy-salted flesh, licking it with her tongue. She bites again, her jaws aching to clench, teeth gnawing to draw deeper into his flesh just as the warm tang of copper bursts into her mouth.
It is exquisite and exciting. Her pulse quickens with the sudden outcry of noise in her ears. She bites harder, pulling the warm taste deeper into her mouth. Loud rumbling only dances on the edge of her acknowledgement as the body below her squirms and pushes against her, but her fingers grip hard into his flesh. She clings to his neck, letting the savory flow of his life fill her mouth.
This is like nothing else she has ever tasted before. Her tongue urges the flowing ooze of blood to continue on and on until the movement below stills. Her hands reflexively unclench from their impenetrable hold, and she eases back now that the liquid is nothing more than a slow drip. Lost within the euphoria, Gabrian sits up and licks her lips, enjoying this strange elation just as the bedroom door flies open, flooding light into the room.
Rachael’s high pitch screams echo and bounce off the wall of the small space as two bodies rush in. “Oh my—what have you done, Gabrian?” Orroryn cries out.
Gabrian open her eyes and looks over her shoulder, confused by the intrusion and the chaotic display. Her eyes catch on the mirror. The reflection staring back is a charcoal and crimson smeared feral creature, with icy glowing eyes. Her face is stained in streaks of red and her aura flickers in a golden hue. All she can do is grin.
She twists her head, taking it all in with admiration. From a dark corner, a vaporous form claps slowly with his applause, his approval of her performance. “That is my girl,” he jeers. “Since you have no problem killing the Shadow Walkers you love, killing the rest will be easy. Well done, my dear.”
Gabrian pulls her eyes away from the mirror—and the ghost in the mist—and looks down to gaze at the still body, a torn jagged mess of flesh staring back at her from the base of Shane’s neck. His eyes are drawn and blank, life gone from this world. The high of the blood rush leaves her soul bare—another innocent life stolen on her watch by her very hands.
The snide chittering of a familiar v
oice punches her hard from behind as the Eorden Elder steps into the room and stands beside Orroryn and Rachael. “Cimmerian was right to hate you,” Kaleb hisses out at her. “We should have let Caspyous kill you.” He hisses again, pointing to the shadowy corner. “You are nothing like me. You are just like him. Nothing but a monster.”
Chapter Fifty-Three
Nightmares and Fire
A large frantic form bursts out from the corner of Gabrian’s room, rushing to her thrashing body as screams fill the air around them. Draping his hand over her forehead to check her temperature, but finding none, he sets his hands on her shoulders to hold her still. Tynan whispers low, trying to lore her out of the nightmare she is drowning in.
“Gabe, wake up. Please, wake up,” he says, hoping that it is only a nightmare and not something else. He is not sure he can handle seeing her go through another bout of internal damnation to her soul. “Gabe, please wake up.”
The softness of Tynan’s words breaks through her screams. Gabrian’s arms flail widely as she fights her way back to consciousness and clammy sweat dews on her skin. Wide, frantic eyes scan the room, and her chest heaves, desperate for air not filled with copper and the tell of her monstrous actions.
“I killed him,” she whimpers, tears running down her cheeks. “How could I kill him like that?”
Wiping the tearstains from her face, Tynan tries to reason with her. “Who did you kill?”
“Shane,” she can barely say his name. The vividness of the act and of what she is, is so real—too real to her. “I killed Shane.”
“No, Gabe,” he assures her, assuming she is still living the night they were both in Erebus. “You didn’t kill him. You both made it back from Erebus.”
“I don’t mean—” she quiets herself as the lucidness of her mind slowly wakes up and brings her back from the nightmare. “I mean, I killed him…myself. I took his life, I bit him, and—”
A softer tone slips over his lips, knowing how much she misses him even though she barely asks. He can feel the sadness reek from her, and he wants to tell her everything will be okay, but he just does not know himself. It is not his place to discuss Shane’s progress or his decisions, and there is no sense in giving her false hope. It is cruel, he knows, but it is better this way.
“Gabe, it was only a nightmare.” He cups her chin and gently coaxes her to look at him. “You did not kill him. Okay?”
Gabrian sinks into his deep green gaze. The softness they hold gathers her in them and settles the wildness in her mind, slowly reassuring her that Shane is indeed still alive. She looks down at the azurite stone. Although there is no hum, she is still connected to his soul, and she exhales with a nod, trying to let go, and knows Tynan would tell her if anything had happened to him.
He takes her tiny hands in his own, heat warming her fingers. “Better now?”
“Yeah, I guess.”
Leaning in, Tynan kisses her forehead gently and gets up from the bed. “The sun is about to rise. I am going to go put some coffee on. Sound good?”
“That sounds awesome, Uncle Ty.”
“Go have a shower. It will help make you feel better before the Elders get here.”
“Elders?”
“I could only convince them to give you one day, so it is back to training today.”
“Ugh, I was hoping they would forget all about me.” She exhales, falling back into her pillow. “Maybe I will get lucky today and Arramus will set my whole body on fire.”
“I think that is part of his plan.” Tynan chuckles, heading for the door.
“What? Seriously?”
Chapter Fifty-Four
Forgiveness
It was nice to spend the last free moments of her day off with her Uncle Ty. It was also nice for her to see him actually smiling and joking around again like his old self—the playful man-boy who had always come to visit her while she was growing up. So much has changed. So much has happened. Even in their strange Magikal world, he had to admit Gabrian’s circumstances are the extreme.
A light rapping at the kitchen door stirs Gabrian and her uncle from their quiet moment. They both let out a whoop at the same time. “Come in.” A release of humor fills the room with their laughter.
The door swings wide then closes. Only the shuffling of shoes being removed can be heard. “Good morning, I hope I am not too early,” calls out a familiar voice. The lime green aura floats above the Elder as he makes his way through the kitchen. Gabrian and Tynan glance up to see Kaleb standing bright-eyed and bushy-tailed on the other side of the counter.
“No, not at all. We have been up for hours.” Gabrian cheers, sipping the remains of her brew. Kaleb’s presence had been scarce since the strange vision, but after last night, they have obviously crossed over a bridge of understanding, and he is back, to her delight.
“Really?” Kaleb’s brow twists, surprised since he figured she would have slept in a bit due to her forbidden adventures a few hours earlier. “Well, that is inspiring news. I always believed that watching the sun rise is good for the soul.”
Her heart twists a little. Sunrises had become a Shane thing for her. The thought of him lying dead in her dreams beneath her runs a shiver through Gabrian, but she forces a smile to her guest just the same.
“Help yourself to the coffee if you like, we made plenty.” Gabrian nods, hearing her Uncle’s words as he rises from his chair and heads back up to the kitchen. She has got to pull herself out of her funk.
“Thanks, but I already had some tea. Speaking of which, Gabrian, I brought you a little something.”
“Oh,” she says, her mind resurfacing. Unfolding her legs, and getting to her feet, she bounds for the kitchen as well. “What did you bring me?”
“Tea,” he chimes, holding up the small bag made of folded parchment in front of her. “I thought it might be a good routine to get into before we start your day.”
Tynan rinses out the remains of his cup and sets it into the sink. “What does the tea do?”
“Oh, well, this particular tea helps with concentration and clarity of mind,” he says, turning to face Gabrian, a grin edging at his lips—one built from secrets between friends. “And, it is high in vitamin C so it helps to keep you from getting run down.”
“That is very thoughtful of you, Kaleb,” Tynan say, wiping his hands. “Thank you for looking after Gabrian.”
“It is no trouble, really.” Kaleb’s eyes brighten. Last night unloaded a mountain of stress. He found another friend who he knows he does not have to hide from, not anymore, and it is a breath of fresh air to him in a world stifled with toxin.
“Alright, I am off,” Tynan announces. “The others are probably going to arrive soon, and we have some things to discuss so I will leave you to it.”
“Alright, Uncle Ty. I will catch up with you later.”
After the tea is brewed, Gabrian and Kaleb gather on the deck and watch the morning sun cast diamonds over the water.
“So, are you okay?” Kaleb asks, feeling a little strangeness flowing around Gabrian.
“Yeah, why?”
“Well, you seem a little off. The light in your eyes is dimmed.”
“Oh.” She deflates in her chair, sinking back into the pillow. “Well, I felt great after we talked, and I came home, but then I woke to my own screams. It must have been really bad because when I woke up, Uncle Ty was already in my room, wearing the same look he used to when I was sick.”
“Did you talk to Tynan about it?
“A little,” she hums.
“Look, I know you are the doctor here, but if you want, maybe it might help to talk about it. Just to get it out of your head.”
“Yeah, maybe.” Gabrian retells the dream to Kaleb, all of it—even the mushy parts. She has seen him naked, twice, so a little story about her kissing her mate is nothing. She tells him what he said to her about Caspyous and Cimmerian, and about her father being in the room. All of the bizarre details were divulged.
Kale
b sits silent for a moment, pursing his lips. “Well, first off, what do you think it means?”
“I think it means I am capable of everything everyone has ever said about me, the bad things. All I ever seem to do is hurt those closest to me.”
“Okay, yes, I can see that.” He scratches his jaw and takes a sip of the blood tea. “Now, do you want to know what I see?”
“Yes, of course.”
“Even though all of those things you just said are true, and are part of who you are, I also see a girl drowning within her own self-loathing.”
Gabrian grimaces at his words, the same words Matthias has used when they first started training together.
“Now before you shoot the messenger,” he says, holding up his hands, “all I am saying is, maybe the real problem is, you haven’t forgiven yourself. You are holding on to your guilt, and not only your guilt, but of all those who have tried to harm you.”
She nods, sipping on her own tea, and lets the words sink in.
“Maybe I am just shooting bullets in the dark here, but for me, the only way I have learned to move on, to carry on, is let go of the sins. Give forgiveness to those who would harm you. More importantly, give forgiveness to yourself. If you don’t, it will continue to haunt you, slowly eating you up inside. Yes, things have gone badly, and yes, life is full of crappy things, but you don’t need to carry them with you for the rest of your life taking up precious energy and space. You owe yourself that much.”
Still she sits in her silence, gripping the edges of her cup. “But what if I don’t know how?”
“Then you must learn how, or else I can guarantee you are in for a rough eternity.”
