by Tey Holden
“Oh, my God! I can’t believe you!” Karen laughed. Addy was just kidding but she also wanted to make Karen think that she was going for it. The truth was that Addy was afraid to arouse Karen, knowing sexual activity might precipitate labor. She wanted no risks. She tenderly kissed Karen’s thighs. Coming up, she joked. “It all looks very good, but I think I’m going to hold off any deeper explorations until after the baby is born. I don’t want to precipitate the avalanche.”
Karen nodded in agreement, but the disappointment on her face was evident to the point that her eyes welled and, immediately after, the river of tears began to flow. “Oh, Addy, I’m sorry. I so want—.”
“I know, baby, don’t cry. We just have to give ourselves a little more time. Even if it kills us! “Imagine how great it’s going to be later!”
***
“Addy! I think I feel something!”
“What do you feel?” Addy replied as calm as possible.
“I think I’m having contractions!”
Karen was very edgy and this type of occurrence became the norm. Even though, Addy knew it was too soon, not wanting to take any chances, Addy took Karen to the hospital. The runs to the hospital had become so often that they already knew them in the emergency room.
In this type of situation, the always quiet and subdued Karen was gone, and she soon became persona non grata at the hospital. She was at that stage of the pregnancy when hormones took over, and one moment she was Dr. Jekyll, and the next moment she was Mr. Hyde. In her Mr. Hyde moments, she claimed that the hospital was not giving proper attention to pregnant women, and that she was going to sue them for every penny. It came to the point that she had practically threatened to sue everyone in her path every time they went to the hospital and things were not done exactly as she wanted. This new side of her was something that Addy later teased about for many years.
Addy apologized a million times to the receptionists, nurses, and technicians who had to endure Karen’s wrath, criticisms and demands. It got to the point that the hospital staff no longer took the time to check them in, but merely pointed to the double doors of the emergency room every time Addy came in pushing Karen in the wheelchair. Karen hated to sit in the wheelchair, but Addy made her with the pretext that they’d get there faster.
After several false alarm trips to the hospital, Addy’s nerves were also on edge. Karen also aggravated the situation by talking about worse case scenarios. They had already talked about every possible contingency but still, Karen felt the need to make her wishes known. Everything was covered to the smallest detail. Addy hated every bit of that type of talk, but to please Karen she patiently sat through it all.
Sometimes after some of those sessions, Addy would go in the bathroom to have a moment alone and to encourage herself. She was resolved to endure it just as Karen had endured the pregnancy.
***
At the beginning of the ninth month, Karen went to the bathroom one evening and screamed. “Adyyyyy!”
Addy ran and found Karen near panic in the bathroom
“What’s wrong?”
“Blood.”
Addy hugged her to calm her down, as her own heart raced. “Calm down, baby, let’s call Tiffany. She said this could happen.”
Tiffany was on call and replied immediately. “Yes, Addy we talked about this. Bring her in, and I’ll examine her. I’ll meet you at the hospital.”
Addy had the taxi company in her phone contacts, and when she called, the taxi was there in two minutes. She had the cab company on retainer and had even made practice runs with them. Some of the drivers thought she was crazy, others understood and catered to her. When they arrived at the hospital, Tiffany was already there and they were taken inside immediately. Tiffany examined her and explained the situation. Everything was fine but Karen needed to remain on bed rest for the duration of her pregnancy. When they returned home, Karen went immediately to bed. She was physically worn and mentally devastated.
“How long do you think I will have to remain a hostage on this bed? Don’t people get pneumonia and have muscle problems when they are too long in bed?”
“Karen, whatever it is that happens to people when they are too long in bed it’s because they can’t move because they are paralyzed, or in a body cast or something like that. That is not your situation. You can get up to go to the bathroom, and you can also sit up and move in bed.” Addy sat on the bed, reclined on the headboard and held and kissed her hand.
“Addypooh, I’m scared.”
“Don’t be. Everything is under control. I think this was a good drill.”
“A good drill? Is that all you have to say?” Karen gave her a daunting stare.
“Oh, baby, this will soon be over, you’ll see.”
“Not soon enough!” In her frustration, Karen turned and started to cry.
Addy rubbed her back and comforted her in whatever way she could think, but Karen was so worn out already and so tired that nothing was sufficient anymore. Addy was also anxious, and as much as she was trying to hide it from Karen, she knew that Karen could sense her preoccupation.
All sorts of things were purchased to entertain Karen during her bedridden days. Movies, Sudoku books, ebooks, all sorts of foods and desserts were ordered, but time seemed to run slower when all there was to do was wait.
A few days later there was another alarming scream. “Adyyyyy!”
Addy ran when she heard the scream. She saw the bathroom door open and went directly to it.
“I don’t know what happened. I peed in my pants!”
Addy looked down to her pants. “No, baby, it’s not pee, your water broke.”
“Oh, God! It’s happening! Addy, what do we do?” They had gone over the drill many times, but it was as if Karen had gone blank.
“First, don’t panic. I got this. I’m calling the cab.” She called while holding Karen in her arms.
“Okay, the taxi is on its way, now I need to get you a pair of pants and your coat and we’ll go down to the lobby.” She brought the pants and helped Karen to change. As they arrived at the lobby, they saw the cab waiting outside and walked out of the building. “To the Hospital, and this is the real thing.” The cab driver opened his eyes wide and began to drive. They were entering the emergency room within the next two minutes.
As the contractions increased, Karen became restless. She took Addy’s hand and pulled her closer to the bed. “Addy, it hurts!”
“I know, honey. It will stop soon.” Addy held her hand and rubbed her back trying to do whatever she could to comfort her.
“Did you hear that asshole nurse asking me to pee in that little plastic cup? Is she crazy or just plain stupid? Doesn’t she know that I can’t reach down there? And that I don’t even know if I’m peeing, or if it’s that water leaking again?”
“Yeah, yeah, I’m sure it was her mistake. She probably has never been pregnant, or maybe she’s new.” Addy said to pacify Karen.
“She’s an idiot! That’s what she is! And Adriana Marcos, if you ever even suggest that I go through this misery again, I’m going to throw something at you! Because I will never, ever, ever go through this shit again! Do you hear me? Is that clear?” Karen’s temper flared as the contractions increased. She was heading towards that stage when pregnant women turn violent.
“Yes, baby, I know. I will never ask you again.”
“I still don’t know how you convinced me to go through with this shit. This was the craziest thing I’ve ever done in my life! And now look at me stuck here with all these idiots, and this God-forsaken pain!”
The contractions came and she grabbed on to Addy so hard that she was leaving marks on Addy’s arms. She had even stuck her short nails into Addy’s skin and ripped the flesh off. Addy took it all like the trooper she was.
“Why don’t we try a little bit of the breathing?”
Karen looked at her with threatening green eyes. “Adriana, you have obviously forgotten the pain I’m going through here! Do yo
u think that crap is going to help?”
Addy opened her eyes and stared at Karen. “Those brown eyes are the reason I’m in this fucking situation. You put a spell on me!”
Addy chuckled. “Let’s do some breathing, baby, come on.” Karen was in agony and began to cry. Not knowing what else to do, she followed Addy’s breathing lead. However, after a couple of contractions, she quit. “I don’t want to do this! This breathing shit doesn’t work! It’s a bunch of crap! I don’t know why I went along with it. What a stupid thing to do! I think it’s a way to mock pregnant women. I’m going to write a letter to the hospital and tell them to stop bullshitting women, this is false representation.” The nurse handling the baby monitor bit her lip to avoid laughing and looked at Addy who immediately looked the other way to avoid the nurse’s face.
Karen continued. “Where is the guy with the drugs? I thought we asked for drugs? I thought this was the no pain option? If he doesn’t show up immediately, I’m suing the hospital for its last syringe!” Here we go again! The nurse was tapping her arm trying to soothe her, and Addy was holding on to her other hand.
Just then the anesthesiologist came and started the preparations for the epidural block. “I’m here, Ms. Larsen. I’m going to make you comfortable in just one minute.” Her IV had already been running.
“About time! You are late. Where were you? Playing golf somewhere?” The anesthesiologist politely smiled, accustomed to the rough treatment of pregnant women having contractions.
Tiffany came into the room. “What’s all this ruckus you are causing here, Karen?”
“Your people here are not fast enough.” She stopped talking, closed her eyes in pain, and squeezed Addy’s hand as another contraction hit her. Addy’s face revealed such anguish that it seemed as if she was the one having the contractions. “Your drug guy here is not fast enough, give me something quick!”
“He’s working on it.” Tiffany replied. She had busied herself checking Karen as she was listening to her complaints. The ultrasound technician had been working on a sonogram also.
“We don’t have enough dilation yet,” Tiffany said.
Slowly, Karen relaxed when her pain subsided as the anesthesia began to work. Still, she was a bit overwhelmed by all the people in the room, and all the activity around her. Addy was preoccupied as well, but she was hiding it as best she could. She continued to hold Karen’s hand. When the sonogram technician gave Tiffany some data, Tiffany gave the order to move Karen to the operating room. Karen was distracted by all the comings and goings in the room and didn’t hear the order, but Addy was aware that this was quickly taking another route.
She pulled Tiffany to the side. “Tiffany, what is going on?”
“Addy, I’m having her moved to the OR. I’m going to do a C-section for several reasons, one the baby is too big for her to deliver naturally, two she has not dilated enough yet, and most importantly because the baby appears to have the umbilical cord wrapped around her neck, and she may become distressed unless we move quickly. ”
Addy’s heart sunk. “Tiffany, you remember what we talked about, right?” Addy had specifically talked to Tiffany about life priorities.
“Yes, Addy. But no worries, I do C-sections all the times, and wrapped around umbilical chords are common too.”
Addy knew that for Tiffany this might be another day on the job, but it was not the same for her, and she couldn’t help but worry. She had prepared for the C-section possibility, but thinking about it was one thing and going through it was another. The baby could go into distress! Did Tiffany say ‘she?’
“Addy, don’t worry, all will be fine. Do you still want to be in go in with her, or would you rather wait out here?”
“No. I’m going in. I promised to be there all the time.”
“Come on. You will have to put some scrubs on.”
At this point, Karen was no longer in pain due to the epidural block and being more relaxed was able to notice Addy’s anxiety. “Addy, it’s fine. It’s better this way.” Addy was glad that Karen had the epidural because the monitor revealed that the contractions were enormous.
“Baby, I need to get some scrubs on so I can go in with you, give me a sec.” A nurse took Addy to where she could find scrubs and then to a room where she could change. While there she took a minute to call James. She preferred to call James because, unlike JP, he would not go into theatrics.
“James, listen, just a quick call to let you know that we are in the hospital, yes again, but this time is for real. Karen is having a C-section and we are going into surgery in a few minutes. Yes, sure you can come whenever you want. Okay, got to go, bye.” She hung up, changed, and walked straight into the room where Karen was being prepared. She stood next to Karen’s bed and held her hand.
“Let’s get this part over with, shall we?”
“You look good in green.” Even in her precarious condition, Karen was trying to ease Addy’s nerves. Karen knew that the C-section was not Addy’s choice for the birth. She could see the tension on her partner’s face.
Addy bent over and kissed her on the lips. “Green is my favorite color. I love you, baby”
“I know.” As they were making the final preparations to take Karen to the operating room, Addy’s phone vibrated in her pocket. She had forgotten to turn it off after having called James. She pulled it out to see who was calling, it was Laurie. Addy took the call because it was unusual for Laurie to call. She was more of the texting type. Karen was occupied with the preparations and was unaware of Addy being on the phone.
“Listen, baby, I can’t talk now.”
“Mom, dad had a heart attack.” Laurie quickly interjected.
Addy closed her eyes as she listened. “Laurie, I can’t go to be with you now. Karen is going into surgery right now, they are doing a C-section, and I need to be there. The baby’s umbilical cord may be around her neck. I’m sorry, honey, you are going to have to deal with this on your own. He will be okay. He is a strong man. Is Steven with you? That’s good. I have to go now. I’ll give you a call later.” Addy stood in silence, gathering her strength.
As Karen’s bed was rolled to the operating room, Addy walked next to her still holding her hand. By now, Addy was running on pure adrenaline. Her mind was focused on the task ahead with whatever needed to be done to survive the moment.
Addy brought her face next to Karen’s and kissed her gently as she continued to hold her hand. She remained in that position, with her face pressed against Karen’s cheek, through the entire surgery. When the surgery began, Addy could hear all the surgical talk. The anesthesia kicked in and Karen was barely aware of what was going on, something for which Addy was thankful because what transpired was frightening. Addy held on to Karen’s hand, and with her eyes closed prayed to God, the Virgin Mary and all the saints she could remember from her Catholic upbringing.
She pleaded with God for Karen’s life when she had frightening thoughts of losing her. She pleaded for the baby as well because losing it after loving it, and wanting for it for so long would be too painful. And then there was the terrifying thought of losing them both. In pure agony, all she knew to do was pray and beg for her loved ones. Her heart ached so that she even offered God her life in exchange for Karen’s and the baby’s.
As Tiffany had mentioned the baby did indeed go into distress with the umbilical cord wrapped around her neck. A few minutes more and they would have lost the little one. That was the main reason for the speed with which the decision had been made for the C-section. Tiffany had lost no time once she saw the ultrasound. Her decision had been wise, and definitely reflective of her experience.
When Tiffany removed the baby from Karen’s uterus, it immediately began to cry. At that moment, Addy raised her head and saw Tiffany pass the baby to the neonatologist’s team. From her sitting position she saw the crying little one and somehow, she knew that the baby was going to be fine.
Addy closed her eyes and again set her face to Karen’s. Karen
couldn’t see her face, but she could sense and feel her.
Addy kissed her, unable to say a single word. The knot in her throat was choking her. Addy didn’t want Karen to see her face for fear that she might see her anxiety. She knew she had to remain strong and confident when in fact she knew that the amount of gray in her hair had probably tripled within the last few minutes.
The nurses had placed a divider over Karen’s belly so that neither she nor Addy could see what was going on at the other end. Addy didn’t want to look on the other side because she didn’t want to see any of the surgical procedures going on. Karen was groggy, pretty much unaware of what was happening. Even in her state of grogginess, she was trying to focus on Addy’s face.
Still in agony, Addy buried her face into Karen’s neck. As she did, Karen turned slightly and caressed her face with her own. “It’s okay, baby. I’m fine. I love you.” That was when Addy broke down and sobbed. One of the nurses tried to remove her from Karen, but she refused to move and stayed right where she was.
Once the little one was cleaned up and thoroughly checked the nurse brought her over and put the baby in Addy’s arms. Prior to the birth, they had asked them what the name of the baby would be. They had names picked for a boy and for a girl, even though Addy was sure it was a girl. So, as the nurse placed the baby on Addy’s arms she said. “Here is Ms. Alexandra Marcos Larsen, your beautiful and very healthy daughter.”
“Oh Lord, thank you!” Addy held the baby adoringly, and with teary eyes, she placed the baby on Karen’s chest. The little one immediately cuddled to the sound of the heartbeat she knew so well. “Ker, we have a beautiful baby girl, she’s precious!” Addy was literally trembling as she held the baby against Karen’s chest. “Yes, she is.” Karen whispered as she held her daughter with her left hand. Addy nodded amidst a flood of tears. Unable to speak, they kissed.
Karen had gone through all the labor pain and then the surgery, but for the most part, she had been under anesthesia. Addy, on the other hand, had been in constant worry watching every monitor, and every move made by the medical team caring for Karen, praying that all would go well. She also had to okay Tiffany’s decision to perform the surgery and endure the agony of knowing that the baby could go into distress, a fact that was never disclosed to Karen. And then there was the matter of the anguish of having told Laurie that she had to deal on her own with her father’s situation. When all was over, Addy felt like a train had run her over.
