“Don’t worry about it. That’s the whole reason we’re together, right? To leave our lives at the door?”
I nod.
He leans over and pulls me closer to him, his lips only an inch from mine. “When we’re together, it’s just you and me. There’s no work, no stress, no friends, no bandmates, and no fame lingering over your head. Only us. Got it?”
I smile and nod, this time feeling better. He kisses me quickly, then pulls away. “Good. Now eat. I have big plans for us this evening.”
My stomach tightens with all the dirty fun he promises and I quickly get to eating.
When I get to the store in the morning, I feel tired. Extremely tired. I’ve been putting in so many hours between gigs, practices, lessons, holding down a full-time job, recording our album, and having a life, that sleep has been put on the back burner. I decide to take off early, leaving at noon. I want to go back to my place and catch a few hours of sleep before practice, but I’m also in desperate need of fun. It’s been nothing but work since we got signed, and I need to blow off some steam. I drive over to Daniel’s office and find him talking to the woman at the front desk. He smiles when he sees me.
“Hey, what are you doing here?” he asks.
“I blew off work. My lesson rescheduled for tomorrow, so I’m free. Want to go have fun?”
He looks at his assistant. “Do I have any appointments today?”
She clicks around on the computer. “No, you’re all clear.”
He looks at me with a smile. “Then let’s get out of the city for the day.”
I want to jump up and down, clapping and cheering, but I hold myself together. “Sounds perfect. Where are we going?”
He smirks. “I have an idea.” He places his hand on the small of my back, leading me toward the exit. We swing by his place so he can change out of his suit, then we’re back in the car.
“So . . . where are we going?”
He looks over at me with a grin. “It’s a surprise.”
I frown at him. “As long as it’s fun. I’ve been working so much lately, I’m burned out. I need some fun and excitement.”
He returns his eyes to the road. “Oh, I think I’ve got you covered, sweetheart.” We stop at a nearby gas station and fill up the tank. We also grab drinks, chips, and candy to munch on while we drive. Daniel says no road trip is fun unless you have good music and junk food. I agree completely.
I sip on my Big Gulp and snack on my pretzels and Twizzlers while he drives us wherever it is we’re going. We sing along with bands like Sublime, The White Stripes, and The Rolling Stones as they blare throughout the cab of the car. We laugh, joke, talk, then go back to singing. Then he shows me how to play the air guitar.
“I know you know how to play a real guitar, but air guitar is quite different,” he insists.
I laugh. “Is that right? Show me how it’s done then, tough guy.” I crank the music up louder, and since there are no other cars on the road, he steers with his knee while his hands get busy slashing across the air guitar. His eyes squint and his tongue comes out the corner of his mouth while he focuses on hitting all the right notes. His expression only makes me laugh harder.
He tosses the air guitar down and reaches forward to turn down the music with one hand while the other takes the wheel. He shrugs. “That’s how you do it.”
I roll my eyes. “I didn’t realize it was such an art form.”
“Well, now you know,” he says in mock-seriousness.
It’s not much longer before we’re pulling into the parking lot at Six Flags Great America. My eyes grow in size and I bounce up and down in my seat. “Oh my God! I can’t believe we’re here! I haven’t been here since I was a kid.” No one could wipe this smile off my face, and seeing my expression makes his grin grow wider. “How’d you know I wanted to come here?”
He shrugs as he pulls the car forward. “I just figured you needed to have some fun, and what’s more fun than riding roller coasters all day?”
I squeal with happiness as he parks the car. I’m as bad as a kid at these kinds of places. Once I’m here, I never want to leave. I want to spend the entire day standing in line, waiting for the spike in my heart rate.
As we’re walking toward the main entrance, I grab his arm. “Please tell me you’re not scared of heights or wild rides.”
He laughs. “I’m not a big fan of heights, but that’s never stopped me from riding roller coasters. I like the speed.”
I jump up and down.
Daniel and I get in line for Batman the Ride and my stomach has already tightened in excitement. I love going fast and flipping around. I love climbing high only to feel the thrill of free falling. Daniel and I hold hands as we wait in line. He pulls me against his chest and hugs me close, helping to keep me warm. Even though it’s later in the year, there’s still a chill in the air. I have a feeling my face will be numb by the time we get off this ride.
We finally take our seats on the ride, pulling the restraints down over our heads. Adrenaline is already pumping through my body and I feel like I’m riding the highest high. The ride starts up and we fly out into the open air—twisting, turning, flipping, and diving. I laugh and cheer the whole time, and I can hear Daniel cheering right along with me. It seems like the ride is over in a flash, and we both pry ourselves out of our seats. Hand in hand, we go to find our next fun adventure.
Hours later, the park is closing and we’re heading back to the car in complete darkness. I take my seat and grab my phone, which I’d left in the car. I see that I have four missed calls and many more missed texts from the guys. That’s when it hits me: I forgot about practice.
Fuck.
“Shit,” I breathe out.
“What’s wrong?” Daniel asks as he pulls on his seatbelt and starts up the car.
“I forgot practice. The guys are going to be pissed.” I let the phone fall from my hands into my lap.
“What’s the big deal? I mean, you guys have been practicing almost every night you don’t have a show. Everyone needs a break.” He shifts into drive and we start on our way back home.
As we drive, thoughts of missing band practice slip away as I start to reflect back on the day we’ve had. Daniel and I have always had a good time together, but most of that time has been spent in the bedroom. We have amazing sexual chemistry. It’s nice to know that we can have fun doing other things too. We had a great day full of laughs, talks, and just enjoying each other’s company. The more time I spend with him, the more I see myself spending the rest of my life with him.
The only problem is, my life isn’t going to be normal. There won’t be any nine-to-five jobs for me. We won’t go our separate ways in the morning and meet back up at home for dinner and quality time. I’ll be off traveling the world. Recording albums. Performing. If he chooses to be with me and stay with me, how will that affect his life? Will he be missing out on having an ordinary life? Is an ordinary life something he even wants? Does he want marriage and kids and all of that? There’s really only one way to find out, but I’m scared to ask. We’ve only just agreed to stay together for now. Once the tour kicks off, we’re both going our separate ways, and who knows where that will lead?
He reaches over and takes my hand in his. “What’s wrong?” he asks, probably sensing the sudden sadness in me.
I shrug. “I’m just tired.”
He lifts my hand up to his lips and presses a kiss to the top. “Understandable. You’ve been going too hard for too long. You need to get some rest before things in your life get even crazier. Want me to take you home, or you want to crash at my place again tonight?”
I would like nothing more than to sleep in his arms all night, but I think it’s probably best for me to go home and reflect more on my life—our lives. Plus, I need a shower, clean clothes, and an early bedtime. I need as much sleep as I can get. I know if I stay with him, we’ll spend most of the night making love instead of sleeping, and if I don’t sleep soon, I’m afraid I’ll collap
se.
“I think I’ll stay at my place tonight. I need to call the guys and make up some excuse. I need a shower and some clean clothes.”
He nods. “You sure everything is okay?”
I nod and offer up a smile. “I’m sure.”
He lets the subject slide and we finish the drive back to my place. I unbuckle my seatbelt and lean over to kiss him. “Thanks for today. I had really good time. It was much needed.”
He kisses me softly. “You’re welcome. Get some sleep.”
I kiss him once more before making my way up to my apartment. I let myself inside and fall onto the couch. I call Van, grudgingly.
“What the fuck, Luna?”
“I know. I’m sorry,” I mumble into the phone as I’m running my hand through my hair. “I’m just so exhausted. I came home from work early and took a nap. I just now woke up,” I lie.
“I came by there and banged on your door. You slept through that?”
I close my eyes. “I guess so. I’m just beat between all the practices, the shows, recording, and working at the store. I’m sorry I missed practice.”
“It’s fine. It’s not like we haven’t been playing enough as it is. Just get some rest.”
“Oh, I’m going back to sleep right now,” I promise.
“Talk to you tomorrow,” he says, hanging up. I get up and go to plug in my phone, then I head straight for the shower. I shave, wash my hair and body, and get out. I wash my face and apply some moisturizer before combing out my hair and going straight to bed. I sleep all night long.
I’m standing on stage and looking out at the crowd. This isn’t our usual small bar. This is a huge stadium with thousands and thousands of people. It’s nothing but a sea of faces, and all eyes are on me. I look down and find my sea-foam green guitar in my hands. That’s weird. Journey doesn’t leave my apartment. I look around me but the band isn’t there. It’s just me. I’m all alone on this stage. I feel frozen—unsure of what to do. How can I perform without the band? I can’t do this alone.
The crowd starts chanting my name over and over, and I feel as though I have to do something. Anything. My fingers move across the strings of my guitar, and then my mouth opens. A song I’ve never before played on stage comes out. It’s the song I’ve been writing. The crowd starts to sing along with it like they’ve known it for ages. How can that be? I’ve never played it for anyone.
Like it was meant to be, the crowd in front of me starts to split down the middle until I can clearly see Daniel standing in the crowd, looking up at me with his shimmering eyes. The spotlight chases the gap in the crowd, stopping on Daniel and lighting him up for all to see.
My singing stops as we lock eyes. Something is being exchanged, but I’m not sure what. Love? His lips turn up into a smile, and slowly, in the silence of the packed stadium, he starts fading away. Suddenly, he’s gone. I’m left confused. Where’d he go? How did that happen? I find myself looking at everyone in the crowd, wondering if they saw it too. The parted crowd starts to close up until the split down the middle is erased. I look behind me and there’s the band: Van, Lane, and Ridge, all behind their instruments and ready to play.
“Come on, Luna,” Van says quietly, “it’s time to let go and accept your destiny.”
The drums start up and the crowd goes wild, ready to get on with the show. But I’m lost and stuck, unsure of which way to go. Do I start singing like everyone wants me to, or do I try chasing after Daniel to find him and make sure he’s okay?
I jump awake, breathing hard, and I can feel sweat beading up on my skin. I look around and see that I’m still in my darkened bedroom, alone in my bed. My eyes land on Journey. She’s propped up against a chair in the corner. What was with that dream? I get out of bed and pick up the guitar, sitting down in a chair in the corner. I position the guitar under my arm and my fingers start plucking at the strings, playing the song that’s now stuck in my head. I play the song in its entirety then lean back, looking around my bedroom. Suddenly, I know why Van was so worried about Daniel.
That dream was just a representation of what’s going on in my life. I can be on my own and have Daniel, or I can have my band and a great shot at fame. Not both. Only one. And the sucky part is that it isn’t even a choice I get to make. The choice was made for me long ago when I set the band in motion. At the time, there wasn’t anything more important than the band. Daniel wasn’t in the picture; he wasn’t even an option. So how was it a fair choice? I guess it wasn’t. Life isn’t fair. It isn’t easy or clean. It’s hard and broken and dirty. The closer I get to Daniel, the more I’m going to hurt him, and the more I’m going to hurt myself. But I’m not strong enough to do it on my own. If fate wants to separate us, it’s going to have to do it itself. He already means too much to me to back out now.
I set down the guitar and go back to bed. I pull my blankets up around me, hugging pillows to my chest and wishing I were hugging him instead. I force my eyes closed and behind my lids, I see him and the way he was smiling and laughing so freely today. The way his hand felt against mine. The soft touches and kisses as we waited in line for our next adventure. Even that was a representation of our lives. We’re just holding on to each other for as long as we can while we wait for this great adventure—my life—which is about to tear us apart.
Ten
Daniel
I know Calvin’s right, but I don’t care. I know I’m going to be more broken in the end than I’ve ever been before, but I don’t care. I know she’s going to move on and do great things, and I’m going to be stuck here living with memories of her, but I don’t care. All I care about is spending as much time with her as I can before all this blows up in our faces. Luna is my great love story. I feel it in my bones and in my heart. I feel it every time she opens her mouth to sing and every time she smiles. I feel it every time we touch—with every beat of my heart and every breath I take.
I move the pillows she slept on yesterday close to my body and breathe in the scent she left on them. It pulls me into a deep sleep where I dream only of her.
I wake up when something small jumps on me. I open my eyes to see a dark-haired little boy looking at me. I let out a small chuckle before grabbing him and wrapping him up in the blanket with me.
Luna walks into the bedroom. “Axl, what did I tell you? Daddy’s worked hard all week. We’re supposed to let him sleep.” She bends down and presses a kiss to my lips.
“It’s okay. I want to spend all day with my two favorite people.”
“Two?” she asks, sticking out her round belly. “Don’t you mean three?” She smiles.
I laugh. “Of course I do. What’s the plan for today?”
She picks our son up off the bed and shoos him out the door before turning back to me. Slowly, she climbs up on the bed and straddles me. It’s only now that I notice her long hair is no longer black and purple. It’s a dark shade of brown with natural highlights. It’s soft and wavy and frames her face perfectly. She isn’t wearing her usual dark eyeliner and black nail polish. In fact, she’s wearing a long gray cotton skirt and a pink lace top. She’s beautiful.
“We’re taking Axl to the park for a picnic, then we’re going to pick up the crib to start on the nursery, remember?”
“Of course I do. I just forgot for a minute,” I tell her. She leans down and kisses me softly. “But what about band practice?” I ask when she pulls away.
“Band practice?” She seems confused. “I haven’t had band practice in four years, since we got married. Seriously, are you feeling okay?”
My eyes pop open as my heart pounds in my chest. That dream felt so real. I can still feel the happiness that overwhelmed me when I looked at my son who looked so much like her. Suddenly, I realize that the beautiful future I saw wasn’t that beautiful at all. That was Luna giving up her dreams for me. That was me getting everything I wanted while she gave up everything she wanted. Something I can’t ever allow to happen.
Guilt eats me alive as if I had some k
ind of control over the dream, but truth be told, it’s probably because lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about what our lives would look like if she hadn’t gotten signed by that record label. I know things can’t turn out that way, but it’s been fun to dream.
I won’t allow Luna to give up her dream for me. When the time comes—when she needs to move on—I’ll release her and deal with everything else later. This isn’t about me, and I can’t be selfish with her. I have to keep myself in check.
I end up not being able to go back to sleep after having that dream, so I get up, throw on some gym clothes, and take off, needing to work her and that dream out of my mind. I spend a couple hours at the gym—running, lifting, and even stepping into a 6 a.m. class. An hour later, I take off toward the house, needing to shower and get ready for work.
I get to the office and feel a sadness when I walk in and see that Calvin’s door is standing wide open—his empty office there for all to see. It only reminds me that when this thing ends between Luna and me, I’ll only be that much more alone. I sit behind my desk and grab my phone to call Cal.
“Hey, what’s up?” he answers.
“Just feels weird starting my day without you. How are you liking the new place?”
“It’s great. I slept really well since there weren’t any blaring horns or police sirens. In fact, I woke up early and thought about running to get a cup of coffee until I realized nothing was open yet and I had to make it myself.”
I laugh. “So you’re missing the city?”
“Nah, I’m missing parts of the city.”
“When are you going to open up the new office?”
“I just bought the building, so it will be a couple of weeks of renovations before it actually opens.”
“Let me know if you need any help. I’m always down for a trip outside the city.”
Rocking His FAKE World: A Fake Boyfriend, Opposites Attract Romance (Love You Forever Book 3) Page 10
