I lean forward, drinking water straight from the faucet to rinse the taste from my tongue while he stands back, laughing.
Finally, after drinking about a gallon of water, I can no longer taste the expired milk, however, it’s been burned into my memory. I turn off the water and stand, looking over at him.
“I’m kind of worried about the food quality in this place. Why don’t we go out and eat?”
I nod. “I think that’s probably best.” I grab my purse and we end up going to the diner around the corner. We take a seat and it’s only minutes later that Van walks in.
Daniel looks up at him and waves him over. “Have you talked to him yet?” he asks me before Van arrives.
I shrug, knowing damn well that I haven’t. The whole thing kind of got pushed to the side the busier we got with everything else, and I never brought it up during our band meeting.
Van comes and sits at my side, across from Daniel.
“What’s going on?” Daniel asks him.
He shrugs. “I was looking for Luna and nobody answered the door at her apartment. Figured if she wasn’t home, she’d either be here or at the store. Guess I got lucky. What are you two up to?”
“Daniel and I were just talking about the meeting on Wednesday. I wanted to brief him on the tour and the schedule and all that. Why were you looking for me?”
“Well, it’s just that we haven’t really spent much time together lately given how busy we’ve all been, but I wanted to say I’m really sorry about what I said after the show the other night. I’d been drinking and I was just being an asshole.”
“I know,” I agree with him. “Why were you drinking anyway? You don’t drink . . . not like that anyway.”
He shrugs. “I’ve just been stressed out lately. All the practices, shows, recording, preparing for the tour, and then for some reason, I thought it was my job to protect you.”
“Protect me? From what?” I ask, confused.
“From yourself,” he confesses. “I see the way the two of you look at each other and I know you’re still together. You said you were broken up, but then I realized that there wasn’t anything to break up. You were never in a relationship—not a real one anyway. That night, when I was drinking, I realized that you weren’t alone in your dressing room. He was in there, and I was pissed that you lied, and that you felt like you had to lie. We’re best friends and we’ve always been truthful with each other. Well, that is, until I fucked up and tried controlling something that was none of my business. It’s your life and you can live it the way you want. If you guys want to be together, be together. I’m stepping back.” He looks at both of us. “Anyway, that’s all I wanted to say. You can stop sneaking around now.” He taps the table and stands up, walking out without another word.
I look at Daniel, a little surprised. “Well, I wasn’t expecting that,” I think out loud.
“Yeah, I wasn’t either, but it’s good to know that we can spend our last week without having to worry about getting caught.”
I nod. “Right. I’m relieved too,” I say, mindlessly staring at the menu on the table in front of me, but I can’t help but think about his words. Not that who I sleep with or get into a relationship with is any of Van’s business, but his blessing means more to me than even I understand. Van has been my protector for many years. He’s always been the one to pull me back from the edge, to calm me down when I need it, and to make decisions for me when I’m too close to something to see what needs to be done. The fact that he’s stepping back makes me think that he thinks I no longer need it. Like now that I’m with Daniel, he can be that for me, giving Van a much-needed break. Does he think that Daniel and I will end up together? Is he finally approving of one of my relationships? That’d be a first. He’s always been the first one to point out what’s wrong with each guy I’ve dated. But he’s never done that with Daniel. In fact, his main concern was that I’d fall so much in love with him that it would end the band. That’s never been his reason for concern before. Maybe he sees something I don’t in the future I have with Daniel.
I’m quiet during breakfast as I think everything over. I want to talk to Daniel about all of this, but I’m not sure how to. We’ve had a deal all along. All of this ends when I leave. I thought it was the only fair option. That way, he won’t be sitting around waiting for me to return and I won’t be selfish by asking him to come with me. But now, I’m not so sure. Daniel has been consistent with his perspective on it: I leave, we’ll end, then we’ll see what happens. But suddenly, I want more than that and I don’t know how to broach the subject. It isn’t fair for me to ask him.
After breakfast, we swing by the store and he hangs out while I do some management business: double-checking our books to ensure all the money is accounted for, making the schedule for the last time, and just taking in this moment. I look around at the place that’s been home since I was a kid. There are pictures on the wall of me as a little girl, taking guitar lessons. Awards, medals, and trophies line the shelves. It really is like I just walked into my childhood living room. The dark-paneled walls and orange shag carpet are something I’ve taken for granted for too long. I always just come in here, do my work, and leave. But now that I know this won’t be a daily part of my life, it stings. I couldn’t be happier about the band’s success, but I never thought I’d be leaving this part of my life behind. And for now, my assistant manager will be taking over the store.
When I step out of the office, I find Daniel and his niece sitting together. She’s playing a song I taught her and he’s watching her with happiness and pride shining in his eyes. It’s my last teaching session and I’m a little sad to say goodbye to her too. Why am I suddenly so connected to everything I took for granted before?
I sit down and listen as she plays the song like a seasoned pro. I smile when she finishes. “It looks like someone’s been practicing.”
She nods and rolls her eyes, because she’s not at the age where she knows how to take a compliment. “Every day. What are you going to teach me today?”
I laugh. “Well, grasshopper, our time has come to an end. There’s nothing left for me to teach you. It’s time for you to take that knowledge and do something great with it.”
She laughs and shakes her head. “You’re so weird.” She looks up at Daniel. “You two really are perfect for each other.” She grabs her guitar and starts plucking away at the strings, leaving me to look up at Daniel and Daniel to look down at me. Does he think so too?
Daniel and I end up spending the rest of the day together. We go shopping so I have plenty of socks and underwear to take with me on tour. I buy all-new bathroom toiletries for the bus so I don’t have to pack up my entire apartment, and I end up buying a bigger duffel bag so I have the room I need to shove everything into it. I get a few new outfits and some athletic sets for days when I’ll be lounging on the tour bus, and he buys me a bunch of stamps—making me promise to send him a postcard from every city we stop in. It sounds cheesy but romantic at the same time, and at this point, I’ll do anything he asks in order to stay close to him.
We have dinner at a local bar and grill then end up back at my place for the night. Daniel helps me go through my things as I start packing. I also give him the log-ins to my finances so he can keep the music store paid up and everything turned on while I’m gone. I’m lucky to have a good lawyer to handle these things for me.
It’s going on midnight by the time we come together in bed, and as always, everything else falls away.
Daniel and I spend every moment we can together. He goes to work, then comes running back to me wherever I am—whether it’s band practice, a show, the store, or at home getting ready for the tour. Every hour passes like a second, and during the rest of the week, it continues to feel as if someone has hit the fast-forward button.
Finally, it’s Saturday night and time to leave. I grab a couple bags and Daniel takes the rest to lug them down to his car. I lock up the apartment and feel a little sad that I won
’t be back for so long, but I don’t give myself much time to think about it. I force myself to keep moving until I can’t anymore.
The car is loaded down and he’s behind the wheel, holding one of my hands in his like he has to spend every last minute touching me. The long drive goes by too quickly. We finally make it to the tour buses and he parks the car and pops the trunk. Immediately, two people rush over to start loading everything onto the bus. Daniel and I walk hand in hand over to where the band is standing with Wesley and someone from the label. They’re all talking and laughing, but I can’t seem to fit myself into the discussion. All I can think about is how this is it—the moment we’ve all been waiting for, counting down to, and—some of us—even dreading. This is our end . . . for now at least. This is the moment when we have to say goodbye and mean it. There’s no more we have to stop this while knowing we’ll only come together later. This is it.
While we wait for everything to get loaded up and ready to go, Daniel pulls my back against his chest and wraps me in his warm arms. I can feel the love radiating off of him. It’s hot—like a heated blanket has been wrapped around me. It’s comfortable and something I never want to leave when I think about braving the cold world without him.
“All right, we’re ready to go,” the driver says, climbing onto the bus.
Everyone starts shaking hands and saying their goodbyes. The two of us watch the guys climb up, leaving us all alone.
I spin around in his arms and meet his eyes. They’re shining and he’s smiling, but something tells me he’s smiling through the pain of this moment. His hands move up to cup my cheeks, keeping my eyes trained on his. “I want you to know that no matter what happens—you could come right back here in a couple of weeks or you could decide to run off and marry some rock star—I will never let us go. No matter where you are in the world, I’ll be right here, thinking of you, rooting for you, and celebrating every accomplishment you ever achieve.” He leans in and presses his lips to mine for a long, slow kiss.
“Come on, Luna!” Van yells from inside the bus.
I pull back and study Daniel’s face. “I’m not marrying anyone. I will come back here, and if you’re still here, wanting me as much as I want you, we’ll pick up right where we left off.”
He smiles and nods. “Go on. Your destiny awaits.” He walks me over to the open door on the bus.
I take a step up, but then turn back for one last kiss. I wrap my arms around his neck and pull him against me, kissing him hard and fast and full of love. We haven’t told each other I love you yet, and I refuse to do it like this. When we utter those words, I want them to be real—not something that fell out in a moment of uncertainty. Those words will be said, and they’ll change everything. That will be our real beginning.
I pull away and offer him a smile. “I guess I’ll see ya later.”
He nods and steps back. “See ya later, Luna.”
I force myself to turn around and walk up the steps to get on the bus. Inside, the guys are hooting and hollering, excited that we’re finally embarking on this adventure. But I can’t match their enthusiasm. I can’t take in the awesomeness of the bus or the excitement of the guys. All I can do is have a seat and look out the darkly tinted window at Daniel, who’s still stuck in place. He can’t see me, but I can see him. Somehow, he feels me and offers up one last smile as he holds up his hand to wave. The door on the bus closes and the driver shifts into drive. Slowly, we start rolling forward.
Daniel and I are officially not together anymore.
Fourteen
Daniel
I stand there, in that wet parking lot in the middle of the night, until the bus taillights are no longer in sight. The night around is me quiet, cold, windy, and wet. Suddenly, I’ve never felt more alone. I turn and walk back to my car, climbing behind the wheel and starting it up. On the drive home, I call Calvin, not knowing what else to do.
“What’s up, man. How’s it going?” he asks when he answers.
“I just put Luna on her tour bus and am driving back home.”
“Oh, man. That sucks. I’m sorry.”
I shrug even though he can’t see me. “It is what it is, I guess. We both knew this was coming.”
“And how do you feel now that everything is said and done? Would you have changed anything?”
I think about it for a moment. Would I take back all those days I spent with her? Would I take back all those nights I spent inside her—even if it could take away a little bit of this pain? “No. I think she was worth the broken heart,” I confess.
“Well, I hope that fact makes you feel a little better at least. Not many people get what you had.”
“Yeah, but a lot more people have what I never will,” I think out loud.
“You can’t think that way, Dan. If it’s meant to be, it will find a way. You just have to trust.”
“Yeah, yeah. I’m tired of talking fate and emotions. What’s new with you?”
“Nothing. The office is open and I’ve sealed the deal with some new clients, so that’s good. How are things back at the Chicago office?”
“Good. Busy as ever. Some of your clients have crossed over to me. Some others have decided to keep you and work with you remotely and will be in touch soon. Others I haven’t seen yet, so I don’t know what they’ll decide. Hopefully, they’ll stay, but what can ya do?”
“Well, if you find yourself with some free time, I could use some help down here setting up the office and training the new employees.”
“Sure, I’ll check my schedule in the morning and see what I have and who I can move around.”
“Sounds good, buddy. See you later.”
“See ya,” I say, hitting the button on the steering wheel to end the call.
I plan on going back to my place to crash but end up finding myself unlocking Luna’s door and walking into her apartment. She gave me a key to keep the place up while she’s gone, just in case something needs to be addressed, but the trash has been taken out and the fridge has been emptied. There’s nothing left here but her stuff. But her stuff is better than not having any piece of her, so I lock the door behind me and go to her bed to sleep.
Her scent surrounds me and helps me fall asleep, but it’s not deep or dreamless. In fact, all I do is dream of her, wake up, then fall back asleep only to dream of her some more. When my phone alarm goes off in the morning, I feel like I haven’t slept at all, but I have work to do and a life to live, no matter where she is in the world. I get up, make her bed, and leave, locking the door behind me.
I go by my place, shower, dress, and pack a gym bag for later. As always, I plan to distract myself by working out. It’s really the best method. Any irritation I feel at the gods for separating us can be worked out on a weight machine. Any sadness I feel about her leaving can be forgotten through the pain of pushing myself to work harder or run faster.
At work, the day feels like it’s progressing in slow motion. I check my schedule and move my appointments around in order to meet with my clients in the next few weeks so I can spend all of this week in the country, helping Cal. My assistant will still be here, holding down the fort and making future appointments. I work myself to death at the gym and go home.
Monday morning rolls around and it feels like I’ve now gone two nights without any sleep, but I have a life to force my way through and a trip to make to help a buddy. I pack up the car and swing by a gas station, where I fill up the tank and grab an energy drink to get me through. You’d think that after enough nights of little to no sleep, I would crash eventually. But I need to crash tonight rather than when I’m driving, so the caffeine does its thing.
I make it to the country by late afternoon, and instead of going by Calvin’s, I just set myself up in the hotel to recharge before starting work. I order room service for dinner, then hit the gym and relax in the same hot tub I shared with Luna when we were here. As I soak and let the hot water calm me, I find myself reliving that night. I think about how we were
in this hot tub together then went up to our room and made love the rest of the night, and it feels like my heart is seized in my chest. I shake the memories away and get out, deciding a shower and some sleep are in order.
The next morning, I meet Calvin at the new office and Piper is there setting things up. “Hey, Daniel. How ya doing?” she asks when I walk in the door.
I nod. “Good, how are you?”
She smiles sweetly. “Wonderful. Calvin is in his office,” she says, pointing down a short hallway. I walk down the hallway and step into his office.
He’s sitting behind his desk doing something on the computer. He looks up and smiles. “Hey, man.” He stands and walks up to me to shake my hand. “Glad you made it.”
“I didn’t have anything better to do,” I confess as I sit down and he takes his seat behind his desk.
“Have you heard from her?” he asks, probably reading the sadness written on my face.
I shake my head. “Nope, and I haven’t reached out either. I think that’s kind of the point. Quitting cold turkey,” I joke.
He nods. “It’s probably for the best. Neither of you will be able to let go if you’re still in contact.”
I nod in agreement but don’t say anything because I don’t actually plan to let go. In fact, I’ve already purchased a code to watch their live show tonight from the hotel. I’ve known for a while now that I wouldn’t be letting her go, but I always told myself I was wrong or stupid, so I didn’t say anything. I love Luna and know I won’t get over her. I’ll wait for her return, and when she’s back, I’m going to tell her exactly what’s on my mind.
I help Calvin around the office for most of the day and we call it quits around 5 p.m. He invites me back to his house for dinner, but I don’t feel like I’d make for very good company right now, so I ask for a rain check, promising that tomorrow will be better. Maybe all I need is to see her, then I’ll feel more like myself. I get back to the hotel and take a shower before ordering dinner. I hook my laptop up to the TV and pull up the website that’s streaming the concert. I enter my access code and the countdown starts.
Rocking His FAKE World: A Fake Boyfriend, Opposites Attract Romance (Love You Forever Book 3) Page 15
