by Lacey Thorn
“Son of a bitch!” Laramie exploded, standing so abruptly his chair crashed to the floor.
“He drugged her for years,” Declan continued. “She can’t shift. I want Jensen to take a look at her.”
Laramie nodded. “Lawrence will pay for everything he’s done. We’ll find him, and he will pay. I promise you that.”
“I know,” Declan agreed. “She needs to be a part of that.”
Laramie shook his head.
“She does, and she will,” Declan stated. “She deserves the right to draw blood.”
“She does,” Laramie agreed. “So does every male who won’t ever see his sons and daughters in the faces of our future generations.”
“A prisoner, Laramie. He made her a prisoner.”
“I understand that. But she’s alive when others weren’t so lucky. Makes you wonder why he kept her alive when he was responsible for the deaths of so many others.”
“What are you suggesting?” Declan demanded.
“Nothing. Calm down. I’m just stating the obvious. Lawrence kept her alive. Why? He kept her prisoner. Why? Drugging her? Possibly so she was easier to control. Once again, why? Why didn’t he kill her?”
“All the elders knew she was there. He might have lied to us, but he couldn’t lie to them.”
“Why not? He kept her prisoner for five years. There’s no way anyone could have visited and not seen that. So it’s safe to assume none of the elders went to Lawrence’s home. I tore apart the damn place. Couldn’t find anything. I’m hoping Xandra can tell us more.”
“She was heading home when Brock and I found her.”
“Home?”
“Said there were some things she wanted. Made me promise to take her there after coming here to talk to you.”
Laramie nodded, saying nothing.
“She plans to go after Lawrence.”
“And?”
“I’m going with her.”
“I can’t let you do that. I need you both here. Once we’ve gathered all the intel we can, we’ll send the enforcers after him.”
“That could be too late. We need to get eyes on him now, while the trail is still fresh. I’m the best tracker we have.”
“I need you here, Declan.”
“No, you don’t. You haven’t needed me a single day in your life. Koby’s your right hand. We all know that. Jensen deals with everything medical. We all need him. Brock has a brain like a computer. Slade can fix anything you put in front of him. And Matheus…” Declan shook his head. There was a reason Matheus was named after their father. Of all of them, he was the one who was Matthew Holloway’s spitting image.
“You forgot to include yourself in that list,” Laramie reminded.
“No, I didn’t. I remember the day we buried dad. The way you locked yourself in this room. You shut yourself away from us that day. In some ways, you still shut us out.”
“I’m the alpha. There are things I can’t share with anyone.”
“You were never in any of this alone,” Declan stated quietly. “I hope someday you see that.”
“There’s not much I don’t see,” Laramie countered then changed the subject. “I’ve had all the family moved downstairs. Sidia and Jaeda moved your stuff and Brock’s while the two of you were gone. Your mate can join you down there. I’ll give the two of you some time before dinner. We’ll meet afterwards.”
“What about—”
“I’ll tell the others we’re talking in the morning. It’ll just be the three of us. Take her to see Jensen right away. Let’s see how much of the drug is still in her system.”
Declan nodded as he stood.
“Brother,” Laramie called, stopping Declan in his tracks as he headed toward the door. “You know I can’t let you leave with her.”
Declan turned, looking his brother straight in the eyes. “Your mistake, brother.”
“What is?”
“Thinking I was asking for your permission. I was merely giving you the courtesy of letting you know.”
With that, Declan left the room, shutting the door softly behind him. Xandra would have corrected his brother’s assumption she and Declan were mates, but he wouldn’t. He’d meant what he’d said when he’d told her she might not be his mate, but he was hers. He also planned to keep his word to her. After she spoke with Laramie, he’d take her back to her house then together they’d hunt down Lawrence.
What Laramie didn’t understand was that one way or another Xandra was going after Lawrence. Declan was going with her. It was the only way to make sure Lawrence made it back to face the judgment of the whole pack. Declan still wanted to rip Lawrence apart with his bare hands, but he wasn’t one to let emotion rule him. At least, he hadn’t been before meeting Xandra.
She was still chatting with her sisters when he walked in on them.
“Is it time to meet with everyone?” Sidia asked as she came to her feet.
“We’re doing it in the morning,” Declan answered. “I thought I’d take Xandra to check in with Jensen.”
“Are you injured? I thought you were okay?” Jaeda grabbed Xandra’s arm.
“I’m fine,” Xandra replied. “Didn’t they test you when you arrived?”
“We were both hit with darts though,” Jaeda admitted. “You weren’t darted, were you? You never did tell us what happened with you and Lawrence.”
“I’m fine,” Xandra said again. “I’ll see you both later.” She glanced to Declan.
“At dinner,” he promised.
“Dinner, then,” Xandra agreed.
“I’m so glad you’re here,” Sidia said, squeezing Xandra in a hug.
“And safe,” Jaeda added, joining the hug.
When the twins relinquished Xandra, Declan grabbed her hand and tugged her toward the door.
“Where are we going?” she asked, but he enjoyed the fact she didn’t pull her hand free of his.
“To see Jensen. He’s turned one of the outside cabins into a lab.”
She nodded. “Are we really waiting to meet with everyone in the morning?”
“No, we’ll go see Laramie after dinner. Just the two of us,” he told her.
“Then?”
“I’m not going back on my promises, Xandra.” He stroked his thumb over her palm, more because he needed to do it than for any other reason. “We’re here.”
He gave a sharp rap before shoving the door wide and urging Xandra inside ahead of him. Jensen had utilized every inch of space, but it was all streamlined, neat and tidy.
“Come on in,” Jensen said as he glanced up. “Have a seat on the table there, and we’ll start with getting blood.”
“Laramie filled you in?” Declan asked.
“If you mean did he tell me about the lovely Ms. Xandra Blackstone—nice to meet you, by the way.” Jensen stopped midsentence and took Xandra’s hand, giving her fingers a brief squeeze. Then he focused his comments directly toward her. “I hear you were drugged. Any idea what he gave you?” Jensen led her to where he wanted her to sit, urged her down then began moving around her. “I mean, obviously, it was something to prevent you from shifting. I have a few drugs in mind that could have been used. How was it administered?”
“I’m not sure how it was administered at first. Those first few weeks, I was in a daze. By the time I came out of it, the drug was already in my system. After that, it must have been in my food or something I drank.”
“Okay, that narrows it down a bit. I’m going to take some blood.” Declan watched as Jensen inserted a needle into Xandra’s vein then filled the vials he’d lain out. “I should know what you were drugged with soon. Plus, I’ll know the level of it remaining in your system. That’ll give me a better idea of when you can expect to get back to normal.”
“How long do you think the tests will take?” Xandra asked.
Jensen was already turned away from them, focusing on the vials and equipment. “I’ll run everything stat. I’ll have answers to you as soon as I can.”
“Come on. We’ll head back to the house,” Declan said, helping her down. “I’ll show you where you can relax for a bit. You can take a nap or a shower or whatever else you want until dinner.”
“Whatever I want?” she asked. As soon as they cleared the cabin’s door, she turned and leaned into him. “What if I want you?”
“Say the word,” Declan murmured. “I’m all yours.”
She rubbed her lush curves against him, and he backed up until he felt the outside wall of the cabin at his back. He bent his knees, cupped her ass and lifted her so she could wrap her legs around his waist. He knew what she was doing. She thought she could sate the need burning between them before she left. Thought she could have him then walk away. He knew better. There was no quenching their desire for one another. No way she’d ever walk away from him.
“I want you,” she moaned. “I don’t want to, but I do.”
If her words pierced his heart a little, he didn’t admit it to her. The words were more about her than him. She was independent, and God knew what she’d been put through over the past five years with Lawrence. He hoped he could hold it together when she told them. He needed to be as strong as she was, for her.
“Take me,” he urged her. “Use me.”
She skimmed his jaw line with her teeth, nipping and biting. He ground his erection against her then spun so she was the one locked between him and the wall. He wanted to rip their clothes off and free his cock so he could surge deep into her core. He wanted her full breasts in his hands, wanted to suck her nipples. He wanted to taste her, to fuck her sheath with his tongue until she came in his mouth. He also wanted privacy and a bed. Christ! She deserved a bed this time.
“Let’s take this inside,” he whispered as she tortured him with her wicked tongue dancing over his skin.
“Now,” she demanded, rocking her pelvis into his then rubbing along his length.
He gritted his teeth, attempting to gain some much-needed control over the desire rocketing through his body. He’d heard how quickly things moved when a man met his mate. He’d seen it with his brother, Koby. Still, being in the heart of it, the heat of it, was something altogether different.
“Inside,” he said again, firming his voice and tapping her ass with the palm of his hand to get her attention.
She lifted her head with a snarl. Her cheeks were flushed, her eyes dark with lust. She snaked a hand between them, grabbing his dick and giving it a squeeze. “So get inside me,” she commanded.
“Inside the house,” he amended.
She gave a growl and shoved away from him, dropping her feet to the ground. This time, she grabbed his hand, pulling him after her as she moved quickly toward the main house.
“Hey, all finished with your tests?” Sidia asked as they walked inside.
Xandra ignored her sister, turning to Declan. “Which way?”
“What room did you move my stuff to?” he asked, never taking his gaze off his mate.
“Um, downstairs and to the right. Third door,” Sidia told them.
Declan didn’t pay attention to who was around them. He tossed Xandra over his shoulder and took the stairs two at a time. It was time to show Xandra it was okay to need him and that he was a man she could count on, one she could trust. Because when things were all said and done, there was no way he’d let her walk away from him.
Chapter Nine
As soon as they cleared the bedroom door, Declan tossed her onto the bed and followed her down. His weight pinned her in place but did little to keep her still. Her hands were everywhere, stroking, pulling and tugging. She needed skin-on-skin contact.
“Clothes,” she huffed. “Off.”
There were too many of them, blocking her ability to touch his flesh. She shouldn’t need him this desperately, but she did. He was her mate, and no matter how much she denied that, it wouldn’t change. Her bear had chosen him from the first moment. It was obvious his agreed.
Yesterday morning, she’d been focused on escape. She’d known something was going on and used Lawrence’s preoccupation against him. She’d been able to slip away. She’d been terrified of him following her. Worried about how he’d choose to punish her if he found her. She’d lain traps. But instead of Lawrence coming after her, Declan and his brother had. She could have killed one of them. She had hurt Brock. God, the thought of something happening to Declan made her blood run cold.
She grabbed the hem of his shirt, jerking it up and dipping her head down. His skin was warm, reminding her he was alive. He was here, and at least for now, he was hers. She kissed his chest and licked his skin, tasting him. God, he was ambrosia on her tongue.
More than once, her mother had mentioned how it felt when a woman mated, how the need was overwhelming. Xandra had scoffed at the idea. She’d been adamant that no man would ever mean so much to her. She’d been wrong, so wrong. She’d have to figure out what to do about it. Later. Much later.
He tugged his shirt the rest of the way off, planting his knees outside her hips and rising to shrug it over his head. She took full advantage, scraping her nails over his chest, finding his nipples and sucking them. She slid the fingers of one hand down the front of his pants, cupping and squeezing him. She wanted to taste him there.
They were frantic, ripping at buttons and zippers. Declan kept trying to slow things down, but she wouldn’t let him. There would be time for slow later. Maybe. She tried to remind herself they weren’t mates, but her bear was growing stronger without the daily dose of drugs in her system, and it was getting harder to deny.
Declan surged deep with a hard thrust that had them both gasping. Her nails dug into his back while his hands were braced wide on the bed. Their lips met, meshed and moved away to taste elsewhere before coming together again. He ducked his head and sucked a nipple into his mouth. She gave a keening moan, one hand slipping up to cup the back of his head and hold him to her. Each pull of his mouth tugged deep in her belly, adding to the pleasure rushing through her.
He moved, turning them so she rose over him. She noticed he had more access to her breasts this way. He tweaked her nipples, pinching and tugging at them while she rode up and down on his shaft. She controlled the depth of his penetration, controlled the speed and angle. She rode him fast then slowed down, rocked back and forth while he was fully inside her.
“Oh, God! It feels so good,” she moaned, placing her hands over his where he held her breasts.
“Touch yourself,” he commanded, pulling away his fingers and skimming them down her sides. He reached behind her to grasp and squeeze her butt cheek while his other hand slid to where their bodies joined, his thumb finding and rubbing her clitoris.
“Declan!”
“That’s it, baby. Use me. Take what you need from me.”
She let her head fall back, raising and lowering her hips over his. Another orgasm ripped through her, and she collapsed against him, shaking from the pleasure. His hands wrapped around her, his palms soothing down her spine.
“Shh,” he crooned, and it was only then she realized she was crying.
She tried to lift her head, desperate to gain control.
“No.” Declan’s calm voice was soft. “Let it out, baby. Let it all go. I’ve got you.”
No one had said those words to her since she was a very little girl. Her mother had once, just as Xandra had with her sisters—that was until Xandra reached the age where she scoffed at her mother’s…mothering of her. Her father had always treated her as he did Malachi. He’d expected hard work and no excuses. Ever. His favorite saying had always been to suck it up. God forbid, she’d ever cried in his presence. Tears were unacceptable.
“I couldn’t save them,” she sobbed. “I couldn’t save any of them.”
“I know,” he said. “I know, baby.”
It meant a lot that he didn’t try to placate her. He didn’t tell her it was okay. He just held her and let her grieve, allowed her to feel the guilt without admonishing her for it, without trying to dimi
nish it for her. For the first time in too long to remember, she dropped her guard, knowing that Declan wouldn’t let her fall. He was making her forget every promise she’d ever made herself when it came to mating. He made her want. More than that, he made her need.
“What am I going to do?” she whispered, not referring to the past, not even thinking of what she’d been through over the last five years. Instead, she was thinking of him. She’d been dead set on leaving him, walking away and hunting down Lawrence. But how could she leave Declan? He wasn’t a mere lover. He was a mate, and she was learning firsthand exactly what that meant.
“Breathe,” he answered. “For right now, just breathe and let everything else go.”
“I can’t stay,” she told him. She didn’t add that she didn’t think she could leave, either. She wasn’t ready to make that confession yet.
“I know,” he murmured. No censure. No demand. No guilt. Complete acceptance.
“I don’t—”
“Shh,” he crooned. “Don’t. For right now, don’t do anything but lie here in my arms and rest. Trust me to watch over you. Just for a little bit.”
She closed her eyes, breathing him in and allowing the soothing motion of his hands to calm her. Nothing existed outside of them.
She must have fallen asleep at some point. She had no idea how much time had passed, but Declan hadn’t left her. She lay beside him now, with him wrapped around her back. His cock was hard again, the length resting along the curve of her buttocks. It reminded her that though she’d orgasmed before her emotional dam had broken, Declan had not.
She wiggled, adjusting her position against him. Declan responded with a groan as one hand clamped on her hip. She moved again, enjoying the feel of his length where it stroked her skin. She wanted to turn and taste him, but Declan had another plan. She felt him slide one hand between them then he nudged her top leg forward, opening her to him. Fingers slid along her damp lips, where desire had her ready for his penetration. One digit slipped inside, rubbing along her inner walls.
“God, you feel so good,” he moaned.
“Declan.” She turned her head as she spoke his name. Everything she felt caught in her throat, allowing no further sound to escape.
