by Kira Adams
She is standing against the outside of the building smoking a cigarette. It’s a terrible habit she picked up sometime last year at a party. I tried to get her to quit for so long, but I eventually just stopped trying. I even tried to tell her it’s like kissing an ashtray, but Sophia does what she wants. I grimace as I walk out and right into her puff of smoke.
“Hey babe,” she coos as she puts out the cigarette.
“Hey,” I reply, bored.
“We don’t have much time.” She grabs my hand and pulls me to our usual spot hidden underneath the bleachers.
I have trouble getting hard at all. Between the disgusting smell that emanates off her clothes, hair, and breath and the disgusting taste in her mouth, she is the least desirable person in the world to me, not to mention everything else I dislike about her.
Even with my dick in her mouth, nothing seems to be working. As she continues to attempt to arouse me, I flick my eyes through the bleachers and notice Madalynne Johnson walking through the back gates with a girl I don’t recognize. Madalynne has been a part of our group for years. She’s absolutely stunning and genuine, but Parker Grant claimed her years ago, and fortunately for Parker, he’s one hell of a guy.
I squint my eyes to get a better look at her unfamiliar friend. She has short blond hair and is wearing a yellow sundress. She is not skinny by any means, but I’m rather enjoying her curves. Sophia barely has A cups, whereas this stranger seems to be rocking Cs. My mouth salivates just thinking about it, and I can feel the blood rushing to my dick, which excites Sophia into speeding up her pace. I’m nearing the edge when the blond’s eyes look up, and I swear to God she sees me.
Holy fucking shit.
No fucking way.
It’s Ciera Nelson, the same girl Joe’s been pushing around for years. My dick instantly goes limp.
What in the hell? What is Madalynne doing with her?
I rush to pull my pants up and push Sophia away roughly.
“What the hell?” she cries, rubbing her mouth with the back of her hand.
“I think someone saw us…” My cheeks are heating up at the thought. Poor girl may be traumatized for life…but not as traumatized as I am just knowing I got turned on for the first time in weeks just by her body.
She’s frumpy and definitely not desirable. I don’t even know what to think.
“What!” Sophia shrieks, standing up, her eyes darting around wildly. “I don’t see anyone.”
I flick my eyes back to where I had previously seen Madalynne with Ciera, and they are not there anymore. “Huh,” I mumble. “I have to get ready for the game.” I begin walking away from Sophia when I feel her grab my arm.
“You’re coming to the party tonight, right?” Her eyes are pleading with mine.
“Yeah.” I nod. “I’ll be there.”
“Good.” She smiles brightly. “Then we can pick this up where we left off.”
Oh joy. I nod without another word. Hopefully I’m plastered by then…
It’s the end of the second quarter when I peek up into the stands, attempting to catch a glance of Madalynne with Ciera. I have to know if she saw us. I’m so curious as to what the two are even doing together. My eyes are still raking the crowd when they stop abruptly.
What the…
I notice my father in the stands, something I haven’t seen since I started playing; work has always taken up the majority of his time. Then I notice another familiar face to the right of him: Clarke. The same guy he introduced me to the other night. My stomach drops. I can’t believe he brought him here, in front of everyone. Now they are all going to know I have a fag for a father.
I’m still fuming when the football hits me directly in the skull, knocking me down. I’m still conscious, but my head is pounding like hell from the impact. I hear the sound of a whistle and shouting about a timeout, and then notice all my teammates’ cleats surrounding me.
“What the hell, man?” Joe exclaims. “Are you alright?”
I grab his hand and allow him to help me up, but I am still shaky on my feet.
Coach Robertson comes running up. “That looked bad, Carlson. I think you should sit out the rest of the quarter.”
I try to object, but before I know it, I’m being carried off the field.
I sneak one more glance up into the bleachers and notice my father sharing a pained expression with Clarke.
I break my eyes away from them, feeling the heat rush to my cheeks again.
Today just keeps getting fucking better and better.
6
I got off work early tonight, a rare occurrence for me. Turns out we were deader than they had expected to be, so I took advantage of my free time to call the number for the hair stylist Madalynne suggested. I don’t have a cell phone. We’ve never been able to afford one, so I’ve always been thankful my job allows me to use the phone whenever I need to.
Carly was at work and apparently free and suggested I drop by, so I walked there, happy her salon was coincidentally on the same side of town as my job. I’m out of breath when I walk in. There isn’t anyone in the salon except for a couple of hairdressers, none of whom I know to be Carly, and then I notice Madalynne is also there.
“Hey.” I greet her timidly as I enter the salon.
“Hey,” she replies warmly. “Carly let me know you took her up on that favor, so I figured I’d drop by to make sure she doesn’t mess up your hair or anything.”
My eyes grow wide, and Madalynne starts giggling.
“I’m only joking. Carly is fabulous—one of the best, for sure. I just figured you might like some moral support.”
I smile back at her. I still have no idea why she is being so nice to me.
A fire-engine redhead with tattoos and piercings walks up to us. “You must be Ciera.” She sticks out her hand for me to shake. Her green eyes are sparkling and she has a captivating smile. She has cheek piercings that create dimples, and I like the look on her.
I take her hand and shake it.
“So, Madalynne told me what those bitches did to you at school today.” Her face crinkles up with concern.
“Yeah,” I respond, looking down at my shoes.
“Well, don’t worry, you’re in luck. We’re going to have you looking fabulous in no time!”
I can’t help but smile. Between Carly and Madalynne, I’ve never been treated so well in my life.
“Come on.” Carly motions for me to follow her, and Madalynne and I walk behind her to her station. Once I’m seated and she’s draped a cover over my body, she twirls my chair so I’m facing the mirror.
I hate looking in the mirror. Besides the whirlpool of blue in my eyes, I don’t really have much going for me. I’m quite the plain Jane. I don’t even wear makeup. One, I don’t know how to apply the stuff, and two, I can’t afford it. I’ve always wondered what I would look like with a little mascara or lipstick.
Carly grabs my hair and pulls it past my chin. “So, unfortunately, we are going to have to go short. But, I can do lots of layers and maybe we can even throw in some darker shades of blond. What do you think?”
I’ve never dyed my hair in my life. I can’t even imagine what it would look like. “I appreciate the offer, but as I already told Madalynne…I don’t have any money to spare right now.”
Carly giggles as she begins to grab her utensils out of a drawer. “Oh, don’t you worry. Just leave everything up to me!”
An hour and a half later, I feel like a new person altogether. Between the haircut, style, and color, it really brings attention to my eyes. I’ve never felt beautiful before, but for the first time ever, I feel worthy of someone’s attention.
“Oh my god!” Madalynne squeals, throwing her hands over her mouth. “Ciera, you look so good!”
I break out into a small smile, touching my hair. I love it.
“You are going to be breaking some hearts, that’s for sure,” Carly says softly.
I grab my glasses from the countertop and begin to slip th
em back on.
“Have you ever tried contacts before?” Madalynne asks.
I shake my head. “No. I have some, I just…the idea of sticking my finger in my eye sort of freaks me out.”
Carly chuckles. “I totally get it, but look at these.” She points at her vivid emerald green eyes. “Did you really think these were real?”
“I…um…well…”
She giggles as Madalynne joins in.
“Naturally, I have brown eyes. But so boring, right? I love these!”
I nod smiling.
“Thank you so much, Carly. I really mean it. I don’t know how I will be able to pay you back…or Madalynne, for that matter.”
She removes the cover with all my hair clippings and drops them to the floor. “It’s no biggie. Plus, you’ll come back and see me, right?” She winks.
I nod. “I don’t even know if I can afford you though.”
She smiles, her green eyes sparkling. “Oh Ciera, don’t be silly—you get the friends and family discount.”
I blush. I’ve never had any friends other than Mack, and in one day I’ve gained two. A day that started shitty is ending up being one of the best days of my life.
“What do you have planned the rest of the night?” Madalynne asks, her brown eyes boring into mine.
I shrug. “Nothing really…why?”
“Well, if you’re cool with it, I was thinking maybe we could hang out a bit more. I know there’s a football game tonight, if you’d like to go.”
Madalynne wants to hang out with me? Like…voluntarily? I swear I’m hallucinating.
I haven’t been to any of the football games. Mack and I don’t really care for the sport all that much, and there has never been anyone I’ve wanted to hang out with there before. But, when a member of the A-Team is actually being nice to you, you can’t pass it up.
“That would be nice,” I reply.
“Cool.”
We say goodbye to Carly and begin walking out to Madalynne’s car.
“Hey, there are a few pit stops we need to make before the game.” She looks at her watch. “I think we can make it.”
The pit stops she is referring to turn out to be my house and the mall. First she urges me to run inside and grab my contacts and solution, which have never been used before. I do as she asks but barely make it back outside again, my mom and siblings holding me up as they fuss over my appearance.
By the time we head to the mall, we have less than forty-five minutes until the game. We head into a boutique-looking store called Maurice’s, and Madalynne eyes me up and down. “What size are you?”
I want to bury myself under a rock. Well, I’m definitely not a size four like you! My cheeks begin burning.
She senses the uncomfortable tension in the air. “Look, we’re friends…right? I’m not going to judge you.”
She’s acknowledging the fact that we are friends. This morning I started the day out with one friend, and I’m going to be ending the night with three. It still feels surreal.
I nod, swallowing my fear down. “I’m not really sure. I wear my mother’s clothes, and I’m pretty sure we are not the same size.”
Madalynne shrugs. “No big deal. Let me grab someone to help us.”
As it turns out, I am a size eleven. Double digits. That said, Madalynne must have known something prior to bringing me in this store, because they have clothes ranging all the way up to a size twenty-four. She rushes around, grabbing a handful of clothes, and pushes me into a dressing room. She urges me to make it quick, and I do my best. Although she knows I have no money to pay for any of it, she continues to urge me to try on everything she finds.
When I get to a flowery yellow sundress, Madalynne’s eyes brighten. “That’s the one.”
I look down at the dress then back up to her. I love it. I loved it the minute I put it on. But she can’t be serious.
She asks the sales lady to grab some brown cowgirl boots and has me try them on with the dress. Then she walks me to the full-length mirror.
“Look.” She motions toward the mirror.
I do, and I swear a complete stranger is looking back at me. If it weren’t for the glasses, I wouldn’t even recognize myself. She’s good.
She turns to the sales lady. “We’ll take it.”
A worried expression spills across my face. I already owe you for the haircut, and now clothes too?
She shakes her head dismissively. “Stop worrying. You don’t have to pay me back.”
“Why are you being so nice to me?” I know it’s a repetitive question, but it’s been gnawing at me all day.
Her face falls. “One day you are going to realize there are good people out there in the world. I just so happen to be one of them.”
I take her word for it, and we make one more pit stop at her house before the game. She helps me figure out how to put my contacts in, which is just as difficult as it seems, and then she insists on applying some eyeliner, blush, mascara, and a touch of lipstick. When I look at myself in the mirror afterward, the girl staring back at me is not someone I ever dreamed I’d get the chance to know. I look like a completely new person. The makeup and dress enhance my eye color, and I look happy.
I don’t know how I’m ever going to be able to reciprocate. What Madalynne did for me…speaks volumes about her character. I’m more excited about my new friend than I am about my transformation. My stomach fills with butterflies as we head to the game. I want to call Mack and invite him so badly, but I don’t have a cell phone, and I don’t have his number memorized or on me at the moment.
I’m nervous what people are going to say or think about us showing up to the game together. I’m nervous I am going to regret it, but I finally feel ready to hold my head up high. I’m not the same girl who’s been bullied for the past five years. I’m not the same girl who let the A-Team treat her like complete and utter shit this morning. I feel rejuvenated. I feel alive.
“Look who it is,” Alyssa remarks snidely, eyeing me up and down as she approaches with her posse. Sophia is smack dab in the middle, Topher’s arm rested across her shoulder. She is one of them now. Nothing is ever going to be the same again.
“Look what the cat dragged in,” Joe chimes in, circling around me. He begins pulling and pinching at my shirt.
“Stop!” I say, smacking his hands away.
“I would step aside if I were you,” Sophia says, her voice monotone. I search for any hint of sarcasm, any hint of the friendship we once had…but there’s nothing.
“Excuse me?” I choke out, surprised. “You’re not just going to stand there and let them treat me like shit right in front of your face, are you?”
Sophia averts her eyes, avoiding my gaze, instead choosing to look above my head. “Get out of here, Ciera.”
I inch toward her, my face close. “You’re pathetic,” I whisper, loud enough for a few people to hear.
She gasps, her eyes locking with mine. “Who do you think you are? You’re a nobody, a nothing. I tried to help you once, but you’re beyond help. Do me a favor and get the hell out of our way.”
Her words are like grenades, and the moment they leave her mouth, I know our friendship is over. Done. Kaput. I knew they were going to change her. I guess I just never realized to what extent.
“I feel sorry for you,” I say bitterly. “You’ll do whatever it takes to be popular, but one day you are going to wake up and realize you have nothing and no one left, and it’s all going to be your fault. I can’t believe I ever thought you had redeeming qualities.” I spin on my heel to walk away but feel restricted.
Joe has grabbed my backpack, and in one swift movement, he unzips it, spilling all the contents of my bag. Books, papers, and my binder go crashing to the ground. The group of jocks cackle as they brush past me. My best friend is no more. Sophia is gone.
7
We lost the game. It’s the first game of the season we’ve lost, and it’s all my fault. If I wasn’t so preoccupied being worrie
d about my father and his special friend in the stands, I may have not fumbled the passes. One of my teammates mentions that my father is waiting outside the locker room for me, but I can’t even bear to look at him, so I slip out the opposite entrance and out the front of the school. The party is still on; we all need to lick our wounds, and alcohol will be a great distraction.
When I make it to my car, I notice Sophia leaning against it. “Hey, your dad was looking for you…did he find you?”
I nod quickly. “Yeah, I already talked to him.” I have no energy to tell her the truth, nor do I want to.
“Who was that guy with him?” she asks curiously as I unlock the doors of the Porsche.
I shrug. “I’ve never met him before.”
We climb into the car, and I speed all the way to Joe’s.
I can feel my phone vibrating in my pocket, but I ignore it. I know exactly who is on the other end—the reason I lost the game for our team tonight. No one else knows what really happened, and they have been supportive even though I could see the frustration on their faces. The win should have been in the bag, especially against a team like Central, but I’m the fuck-up who ruined our undefeated title, our winning streak.
“Are you okay?” Sophia asks from beside me. I can feel her green eyes boring into the side of my face.
I turn my head to meet her gaze then switch it back to the road. “Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?”
“You’ve just been really quiet, and you’re driving like a lunatic!” I steal another glance her way, noticing just how terrified she looks.
I flick my eyes to the speedometer. Crap. I’m going seventy in a thirty. Maybe I should slow down just a bit. I ease my foot down on the brake, noticing some of the tension leave her body as she exhales deeply…almost like she’s been holding her breath.
When we walk into Joe’s house, half the team is there along with a handful of the cheerleading squad and other jocks. I head straight to the kitchen where there is an assortment of hard liquor and beer sitting on the countertop.
