“Well, lucky you only have to wait about another three weeks.”
I sat up slowly, finding myself in Anne’s bed, still fully clothed. I grimaced. “Sorry, that was well uncool of me.”
Anne just smiled. “It’s fine, you were a perfect gentleman.”
I laughed. “Well, that’s okay then.”
I frowned as snippets of memory after beer pong started coming back to me.
“Yeah, beer pong hit you are after you got back. You started out not too bad, then all of a sudden, you crashed.” She laughed. “And snored.”
“And drooled by the feel of it.” I grimaced again. “Sorry.”
She waved a hand at me. “It’s fine, but it’s my turn to pass out in your bed next time.”
“Deal,” I laughed, standing up.
As I changed to have a shower, I caught sight of myself in the mirror. “Jesus, I look like night of the living dead or something.”
“I doubt you’re the only one,” Anne said.
I nodded, she was probably right. “I’m going to shower and attempt to return some sense of humanity to this mess.”
“Good luck.” She scoffed sarcastically and I threw a pillow at her. “When you get back, shall we get coffee?”
My mouth watered at the mention of coffee. “God, yes, and a Panadol. Maybe some lemonade. And, something salty.”
She chuckled and nodded. “All the things.”
“All the things,” I agreed, picking up my towel and toiletries.
As I wandered down the hall, I recalled my conversation with Anne before I’d apparently essentially passed out. I can’t say I remembered much about the conversation, but I remembered Anne had made very little sense and I’d come to the sad but true realisation that Austin and I were never going to be together.
I wasn’t about to give myself to a guy who a) I couldn’t decide if I didn’t like or I was telling myself that so I didn’t get hurt, and b) could easily come to resent me and my annoying family – not that I’d be able to blame him entirely. Still, it would be safer all around to just keep believing I didn’t like him like that and save everyone some time and heartache.
Friends, we could totally just be friends.
I heard my name called and turned around. I smiled at Hunter as he jogged up to me.
“You’ve seen better days,” he said.
“So have you,” I replied, indicating his hair, which was significantly messier than usual, and what I suspected were his clothes from the night before.
He grinned. “Yeah, found myself waking up on your side of the school.”
Something about him annoyed me that morning…or, was it afternoon? But, I didn’t know what it was. His usual grin was in place, the one I usually couldn’t help returning. His ruffled hair actually made him look more handsome. His eyes shone, though he looked a little tired. His clothes hung on his body the same way they always had. He stood as self-assured and confidant as always. His voice was the same…wasn’t it?
Then I saw it, the whole package; behind the tiredness was accusation, behind the smile was something almost sad, and behind the seemingly innocuous words was a hint of scorn.
Or, maybe I was just tired, hungover and annoyed about the whole Austin thing.
I scowled. “I’m sorry to hear you had to slum it overnight.”
He looked genuinely surprised at my response for a moment, then composed himself. “It was well worth it for the girl I spent it with.”
“Good for you. I hope you find yourself with some kind of horrible venereal disease.”
“What the hell is wrong with you this morning? Austin didn’t perform last night?” I could tell what he thought of me under the assumption I’d slept with Austin.
“I beg your pardon?” I yelled.
He smirked, not one of his usual charming ones. “I’ll take that as confirmation. Odd, Oz doesn’t usually get complaints. Maybe it was you?”
Oh, I slapped him well and proper, then pointed my finger at him.
“I’ll have you know, Austin was more of a gentleman than you apparently! I fell asleep talking to Anne last night. Although, she’d tell you I passed out. Much of a muchness.”
Hunter looked suitable chastened. “Shit, Lil, I’m sorry-”
“I don’t really care,” I snapped. “I don’t know where this horrid attitude is coming from, Williams. But, I’m glad you think you can insult me when you assume I’ve done what is no different than you actually did. Nice, Williams, real nice.”
I turned and stormed off.
“Lily, wait!”
I whirled around long enough to shout back, “There is certainly no way you’ll ever be finding out how adventurous,” I winked at him, “I am in bed!” before continuing my angry exit with a touch more dignity and self-empowerment as onlookers applauded.
Chapter Forty
I sat at my desk while I waited for the teacher to arrive.
Lily sat on one side of the classroom with Anne and I sat on the other with Jax and Cassandra, though my patience with Cassandra was wearing thinner as the days passed. I didn’t know what her problem was, but she’d been making a bigger deal of Fleur coming to the New Year’s party than I was happy with.
It didn’t help that my mind was stuck on Lily and the kiss she’d given me. She’d hardly spoken to me in the two weeks since and couldn’t seem to look at me. Which only cemented in my mind that she’d been saying goodbye.
I didn’t understand it. We’d been getting closer, hadn’t we? I mean, I hadn’t been expecting her to turn around and tell me she loved me. But, I thought I was certainly heading in a more favourable direction than backwards.
When she’d done the first awkward ‘I have to go’ the day after the party, I started wondering if there was something going on with her and Williams, that she’d said goodbye to me to be with him. But, I’d been gratified to see she’d been even more distant, even angry, with him.
Speaking of Williams, he finally trudged in, late as always, and paused in front of Lily.
“I don’t want to hear it, Williams,” she said, not even looking at him.
“What the hell?” I muttered.
Cass grunted. “Is that still going on?”
“Is what still going on?”
“That lover’s tiff.”
“What lover’s tiff?” Jax joined in.
“Lily and Williams,” Cass answered.
“They were together?”
Cass shrugged. “They’re certainly fighting like it.”
“What do you mean? What happened?” I asked.
Cass looked very smug. “The day after the party, Williams called Lily a whore, and an untalented one at that.”
“What?” Jax and I both exclaimed.
As I watched Williams walk over and sit next to Cassandra, I wondered why the hell he would have been calling Lily and untalented whore… I’d heard he’d woken up in the Longbourn wing after the party, maybe he’d visited Lily after I’d left? Had he spent the night with her? Surely not…
“Hey,” Cass said, smiling at him.
He barely smiled in reply. “Hey.”
“Want to tell me what that’s about?” I asked him, leaning over Cass.
He glared at me; for the first time I could remember in all the years we’d known each other, we were actually angry with each other. “Want to tell me why she keeps staring at you when you’re not looking but barely talks to you?”
I spun around, but she was facing Anne. I turned back to Williams as Mrs Robbins finally walked in.
“Sorry I’m late, everyone.” She smiled, sounding slightly out of breath.
She kept talking as I leant over to Williams. “At least I didn’t call her a whore.”
Williams stared at me as though he didn’t believe I’d have had the gall to say something like that. If that was actually what he’d thought, maybe he hadn’t known me as well as I thought he had.
Mrs Robbins droned on about whatever text we were up to. Usual
ly, I paid a decent amount of attention in class, especially Mrs Robbins’ classes; she was a great teacher who was really passionate about her work and her students, which made you want to learn.
Today, though, I was annoyed. I was annoyed at Williams, I was annoyed at Lily, I was annoyed with myself, I was annoyed at Cassandra, and I was a little annoyed at Jax.
Damn, I knew that wasn’t fair. Jax had done nothing. But, then, that’s part of what annoyed me. If he hadn’t just listened to everything I’d said about the Macklins and the Brewers, if he’d stood up for his feelings and his beliefs, maybe we’d both be with our girls now.
If wishes were fishes…
That was one of Amanda’s favourite sayings. God, I missed her. Thankfully, this was the last week of school before the Christmas break and Manda would actually be home when we got there. And, she was staying long enough to come to Pemberley with us.
I smiled to myself.
Actually, knowing Manda, she would be at Pemberley the day after Christmas so she had to spend the least amount of time with Aunt Celia – if we didn’t go straight to Huntsford. I was already coming up with excuses for Jax and me to leave London and stay at Pemberley with her. But, I knew we had a few engagements to deal with first.
Ugh. Engagements. Where I would have to see Fleur. And, in no uncertain terms tell her there was no way in hell I was going to marry her. I had to. I couldn’t even pretend to go on with Aunt Celia’s wacked out plans now I had an idea of what an actual, decent, exciting relationship could be like.
And, there was no way in hell I was going to have anything resembling a decent or exciting relationship with Fleur.
Maybe a mind-numbing one where I end up in jail for murdering my idiot wife…
I felt Jax nudge me.
“Austin?” I heard Mrs Robbins say.
“God, no,” I replied, then looked around. “Wait, what?”
A few people laughed and Mrs Robbins just looked at me a tad oddly.
“Are you feeling all right, Mister Cooper? You’re not usually this inattentive.”
My gaze immediately shifted to Lily. Way to be really obvious!
“I’m fine, thanks, Missus Robbins. Just a little tired. End of term and all that.”
She smiled at me, but still looked a little hesitant. “All right, then. Now, moving on…”
Jax leant towards me. “You sure you’re right? You were smiling like a nutter and not paying any attention.” Like I hadn’t realised that already.
“I was just thinking of Amanda and her penchant for Pemberley.”
Jax smiled wistfully. “They’ll be ours soon enough, mate. Something of our own that Aunt Celia can’t get her wide-reaching hands on.”
I leant back in my chair and tried to pay attention to Mrs Robbins.
Pemberley would soon be entirely mine and I was more excited than I cared to admit. I would indeed have one thing in this world that was solely mine and no one else’s. It was something I wouldn’t even have to share with my brother. Trying to keep Amanda away – if that were even close to what I wanted – would have been difficult.
Then again, having another certain girl walk Pemberley’s halls would have been even more difficult, but no less desirous.
I tried not to look at her as that thought hung around my mind.
Chapter Forty-One
I glared at Kate in the back seat, then turned back to Claire. We were waiting in the line of hundreds of cars to leave the Netherfield grounds for Christmas break.
“Dear God, you can’t let her go.”
Claire sighed. “It’s already been booked, Lily, there’s not a lot I can do about it now.”
Gemma was busy sobbing about how it wasn’t fair that she didn’t get to go, while Kate was gloating.
“Don’t blame me if Penny Foster likes me best,” Kate said.
“Do you call all your friends by their full name, Katie, or just the rich ones?” I asked.
Kate barrelled on as if I hadn’t said anything. “Or that she wanted me to be her special friend-”
“Special’s right,” I muttered and Claire smiled at me.
“-for her visit to her grandmother’s.”
“But, I could be her special friend! Tell her, Mum!” Gemma wailed.
I sank down in my seat and tried not to listen to them. But, it was the best thing to take my mind off certain people, especially when said people smiled and waved at you as they put their things in a car next to yours. I returned the wave before I could stop myself. There wasn’t any harm in it really. I’d distanced myself well enough from the three of them that I could be sure my heart was safe, but they were still my friends…weren’t they?
“Those boys seem nice, Lil,” I heard Claire say, quietly enough not to disturb the argument in the back seat.
“The Cooper twins and Hunter Williams. They’re good boys.” When they’re not busy breaking girls’ hearts.
“Austin and Jackson? Which is which?” Claire laughed. “Can anyone tell them apart?”
“Jax is on the left, in the grey coat. Austin’s wearing...” I looked back, “ugh, leather, Oz, really?” I smiled and he shrugged as though he’d heard me.
He checked the traffic and jogged over to us. With little choice, I wound the window down and he leant on it.
“You must be Missus Brewer,” he said with a large grin, extending a hand over me, “pleasure to meet you.”
Claire shook his hand awkwardly, but smiled. “Likewise. Lily tells me you’re Austin?”
He nodded. “She is the only one who can tell us apart. Most people would have told you I was Jax.”
Claire chuckled. “And, why is that?”
“Well, you see how my brother is scowling like he lost his favourite toy car?” Claire nodded. “Well, I shall tell you something, Missus Brewer,” he said conspiratorially, “my face usually looks more like that, and he’s the grinner.”
“I see,” Claire replied, sounding like she had no clue whatsoever. I couldn’t say I wasn’t rethinking which twin was which. “Lily told me you were the one wearing leather, though she seemed dismayed by your fashion choice.”
Austin flashed me wicked grin and I breathed deeply to try to get my heartbeat under control. He clutched his chest and stumbled back a little as though I’d personally wounded him.
“You don’t like me in leather?” he cried, but the hint of a smile told me he was playing.
The line ahead of us started moving. I waved him and his dramatics away.
“Bugger off and get ready to go,” I said, trying to hide my smile.
“You wound me, fair Lily!” he called, laughing, as we drove away.
“What the hell was that?” Kate asked, sitting forward in her seat. “I’ll tell you what it wasn’t. It wasn’t as good as me going to Melbourne with Penny Foster after Christmas!”
“Ugh, you are such a toe-rag!” Gemma squealed and they set to arguing again.
I sighed and felt Claire’s eye on me as we drove.
“What?”
Claire laughed. “Nothing. I just... Well, that was not the Austin Cooper I was expecting based on what you’d told me previously.”
I tried very hard to keep hiding smiles, especially as my phone went off and it was Austin.
Austin: I had actually meant to ask you what you were up to for the holidays, but it seems I got a little theatrical... Hope they’re good, whatever you’re up to and I’ll see you in the new year. -A
“Ah, no... No, that was...slightly out of character for him,” I said as I replied.
Me: Just Christmas with the family. You have a great break too. xoxo
Claire chuckled again.
“What?” I asked.
“Nothing, Lil. Nothing at all.”
****
For someone who didn’t work – but had a secretary, yes – you’d think Dad would have bothered to be home when we got there. But, no, instead, he was at a very important golf game.
“Lily!” Claire c
alled after me as I stomped to my room and slammed the door shut.
But, Claire, damn her, knew me well enough to leave me be for now. If I’d been Kate or Gemma, she would have been up the stairs in a moment, cooing over them so they got their stupid tantrum out of the way for the rest of our night. Much like she was doing with Gemma now, I suspected.
Me, though. I was actually pissed and sad, and needed some time to myself.
As great as Anne was, I felt like I hadn’t had a moment to myself since I’d landed in this damned country. No, that wasn’t fair, the country was lovely.
What wasn’t lovely was that it was my first white Christmas and Mum wasn’t here to enjoy it with me. What wasn’t lovely was that it was my first Christmas without Mum. What wasn’t lovely was that I’d fallen hard for a boy and Mum wasn’t here to giggle and dance with me. What wasn’t lovely was that I couldn’t be with that boy and Mum wasn’t here to hug me and eat ice cream with me.
What wasn’t lovely was that Mum wasn’t here and neither was Dad.
I breathed deeply, trying to control my frustrations.
I don’t know why I still got riled up about it. I mean, I was a sensible girl. I knew boys strung you along then ultimately broke your heart, whether it was romantic or paternal. I knew that they were all idiots, no matter how intelligently they presented themselves. I knew that the only people I could rely on were the women in my family – Anne included now. Well...I could depend on Claire...the jury was still out on the others.
I went to wipe my eyes and found I hadn’t actually cried.
“Great, I am so cynical now, I lack the ability to cry,” I muttered and looked around my room.
I’d been here once in my life and it had looked nothing like this then.
The last time I’d been here, the room was full of puffy pink material and unicorns. Don’t get me wrong, unicorns are great, but when it looked like the unicorns violently vomited pink fairy floss all through your room...it’s less great.
Now, though, I could see that Claire hadn’t gone by Dad’s random advice when she redecorated. I saw things from home among the new; my old bedspread, my pictures, the books that hadn’t fit in my suitcases for Netherfield.
Netherfield Prep: A Modern Reimagining of Jane Austen's 'Pride & Prejudice' Page 27
