Watching the friendly with the girls a few weeks back was nice, but if all the home games are like this, I’ll be back. Providing Jackson and I are together. I think I’ve figured out my feelings for him, but I don’t know if I should tell him. How do you tell a player like Jackson that you’ve fallen in love with him?
I’m not sure how he’d take my declaration. I think it’s too soon into our relationship for all that. So, for now, I’m going to just enjoy the time we spend together.
“This is it,” Chance says, jumping to his feet and pulling my hand.
Standing, I look down toward the pitch, and the teams are coming out. Aubrey isn’t as excited about this as Chance, but I give her credit, she’s happy that he’s enjoying this. She let it slip to Kate whilst shopping today that she wasn’t really looking forward to tonight. Kate told her she should try to soak up the atmosphere because there is nothing like it in Scotland.
The teams are lined up with Jackson leading the way as they shake hands with the opposition. It’s just dawned on me that he’s the team captain. Why didn’t I know this?
Because I’ve never bothered to ask. Although, I do know he’s a striker; he plays up front with Fletcher. At least I’m not completely clueless.
Lee turns around with a smile on her face. “It’s good to have you here,” she tells me. “I told you we’d be seeing you at the stadium more often.”
“Yes, you did, but we’ll see.” With a nod of her head, she turns back to face the pitch.
“The view is incredible,” Chance says as the players take position. “How many people does the stadium hold?”
“Sixty thousand, although I think it might be slightly over that,” Sid tells him. Look at Sid, all in the know. Maybe I should take back my thought about me not being clueless.
The whistle blows and we all sit down as Jackson and Fletcher take the first pass from the centre.
I watch the game, but for some reason, my concentration isn’t what it should be. Chance is excitedly telling Aubrey about the game. She’s listening with her eyes on the pitch. “So far, so good. The team is playing great together,” Sid says to anyone that’s listening.
“Come on…” I refocus my attention in time to watch Jackson cross the ball to Fletcher’s feet. Sid and Chance grab my hands, pulling me to my feet. Fletcher takes the shot and scores. The whole stadium erupts, everyone standing as the players on the pitch celebrate the opening goal. The opposition has already made their way back to their half of the pitch to re-group.
The game settles down and the ball is passed between players from one end of the pitch to the other. I cheer when Logan makes a crucial save a few minutes before half time. He then sends the ball so far up the pitch and the only person up there is Jackson. He has the ball at his feet, lifts his head and shoots. I rise to my feet before the others, cheering as the ball hits the back of the net. Chance jumps and hugs me. “This is what I call a real football game, and your man, he’s a pretty good player.”
Lee and Jess turn around and share the same knowing look across their faces.
The whistle blows and they’re two-nil up in what everyone around me describes as a crucial game. If they win this, they qualify for the next stage. See, this is where it goes right over my head.
The team leaves the pitch to everyone standing and clapping. As I stand, I come over all queasy, dizzy and light-headed. I glance around and find a steward, who I ask where the nearest ladies room is. He gives me directions and I rush off without telling anyone where I’m going. As I rush in, I’m glad there’s no one else here as I make it just in the nick of time before I throw up.
What the hell is wrong with me tonight?
I know I’ve overdone things the last few days with work, trying to ensure I have everything Sid needs, but my appetite hasn’t been great for someone who can eat anything. I exit the cubicle to find Aubrey standing there.
“What’s wrong?” Aubrey asks me as I clean myself up in the ladies’ bathroom.
“I just don’t feel too great. Maybe it’s something I’ve eaten.”
“Or maybe it has nothing to do with food and everything to do with this. Don’t hate me, but I bought this today.” She pulls a pregnancy test from her bag. I stare at her as realisation dawns on me this is a possibility. My last period was before Vegas. Shit!
“No, I can’t be.” Tears fill my eyes.
“Have I guessed correctly or have I over-stepped?”
“But, how? Why?”
“I’m not sure. Call it intuition if you want. I know when I saw you yesterday there was something different. Yes, I said you look tired, but there’s also a glow about you, and if I’m not mistaken, your boobs are bigger.”
I look down at my boobs and then stare at the mirror. “Surely not.”
“There’s only one way to find out.” She thrusts the test into my hands. “Go on. I’ll be right here unless you’d prefer I get Lee?”
“No, stay.”
She nods, and I return with the test in my hand to the cubicle to go and pee on the stick. My thoughts are all over the place. What the hell will I do if I am pregnant? I know I wanted to spend more time at home, but I don’t want to have to give up my career.
Aubrey is standing by the sinks when I exit. I hand her the test; she can read it in a few minutes. “If you are, everything will be fine.”
“Will it? Jackson and I are only at the start of our relationship. I know how I feel about him, but I have no idea how he feels about me.”
“I can tell you how he feels. It’s written on his face every damn time he looks at you. He loves you.”
I shake my head as she looks at the test. She doesn’t have to say anything. Her eyes tell me all I need to know; I’m pregnant. Me, Sam Walker, I’m going to be a mum. How the hell will I tell Jackson and my mum? Shit. Logan has only just got used to the idea of me seeing his friend. How will he react to this news?
“Do you want to leave?” Aubrey asks.
“I can’t leave. This is an important night for Jackson and the team, and also for Chance. For tonight, I’ll put this to the back of my head, deal with it tomorrow and enjoy our night together. Chance and Sid are looking forward to the celebrations after the game.”
“They might be, but what’s important here and now is you. If you don’t want to go out, I’m more than happy to leave Chance with the boys and come with you. Me and you could have a date with some Ben and Jerry’s.”
“No, that’s not fair on you or Chance. So, let’s go and watch the second half and then we’ll celebrate because I think your husband was more excited about tonight than he was for working with me and Sid.”
“You’re the reason he’s here. Chance doesn’t jump at the opportunity to work with just anyone. We spoke a great deal about this and you. And no, nothing bad. We both like you as a person and I’d like to think we’re good judges of character. Truthfully, if it wasn’t for you, Chance wouldn’t have even given Sid’s company a second thought.”
“Thank you.”
“What for?” she asks.
“For being here with me.”
“I class you as my friend, so while I’m here, if there’s anything I can do, just tell me. I think you and I should have a girly day alone.”
“That sounds like a great idea.”
We link arms and make our way back outside to our seats at the same time the team takes to the pitch. The smile on my face isn’t fake, but I can’t hide the fact I’m anxious about this. Me, pregnant.
Chance is standing by Sid. He offers to move back to where he was, but I tell him to stay where he is, and I stay with Aubrey. Having her right beside me gives me some sort of support. Lee turns around, her eyes narrowed at me. “Are you okay?” she asks.
“Yes.” I’m not sure she buys it, but she turns back to the game.
The game restarts at the same pace as the first half finished. I try to keep my attention on the game, but my thoughts drift off. I’m surrounded by people and yet I fee
l alone, and all I want to do is cry.
My body trembles and I know my lips are doing the same. Aubrey pulls my hand into hers and offers me a slight smile. Tears fill my eyes and I’m willing them not to fall.
The second half passes in a complete blur. Aubrey managed to keep me right, pulling me to my feet every time our team scores. Final result four-one, with Jackson bagging himself a hat-trick. Chance is bursting with pride as he talks about the team and the way they played. From listening to him, he misses what could’ve been for him, if it hadn’t been for an injury. “Aubrey, we might need to come to Glasgow at least once a year,” he tells her.
“What, to watch soccer?”
“It’s not soccer. It’s football,” he says bluntly. “Now, what happens next?”
Lee turns around. “Now, we all head inside to the players’ lounge and you’ll get to meet all the players.”
“I can’t wait to see them all again.”
My heart starts racing in my chest. Maybe Aubrey was right. I should’ve gone home because now I have to face Jackson and pretend everything is okay. And even I know it’s far from okay.
How can it be?
I’m pregnant and I don’t know what the hell I’m going to do or if I will have the support of Jackson.
I’m in love with Jackson Taylor and I’m pregnant with his child.
Chapter Twenty-Two
“Oh my gosh. The online brochure is amazing.” Aubrey can’t hide her delight on the screen before me. It’s so good to see her face tonight. We might have spoken almost constantly since she left, but it’s not been the same as seeing her. I wish she was still here. Her time in Glasgow seemed to pass by so quickly. I’m really missing her.
“Has Chance seen it yet?” I ask her, because I want to hear his opinion.
“No, but he’s going to love it. Is Sid happy with it?”
“Yes. It goes live tomorrow.”
“As in the day you have a scan appointment?”
“Aubrey, don’t.”
“Who have you told?” she asks, her voice full of concern as she raises her eyebrows.
“Lee and Kate. And yes, Lee is coming with me tomorrow, so you can stop worrying about me going by myself.”
“What I’m worried about is the fact you still haven’t told him.”
“What do I say? Oh, by the way, you know that night we had sex in Vegas? Well, guess what? I’m pregnant.”
“You are a couple now.”
“I know. I’m just not sure how he’ll take it. We’ve not talked about a future. Fuck, he’s not even told me he loves me.” That’s true. We spend all our free time together, either here or at his home, but we’ve not spoken about what’s next for us. He seems happy with the way things are, and if it wasn’t for the fact I’m carrying his baby, I would be happy with our current situation too.
“Sam, you need to tell him…”
“Who do you need to tell what?” Logan asks. I spin around from the computer to see Logan and Jackson standing there. I never heard the front door open. Maybe my brother having a key isn’t such a good idea. How much of our conversation have they heard?
“I’ll let you go. If you need me, call me later,” Aubrey tells me.
“Thanks. Speak soon.” I end our call.
Knots are already forming in my stomach, twisting and turning, and now I feel sick. I close my eyes for a moment in an attempt to gather my thoughts. Think about how the hell I’m going to tell Jackson he’s going to be a dad.
“Sam, are you okay?” Logan asks. “You look sick. You’ve turned this awful shade of grey. Do you have a temperature?” Logan places his hand across my forehead and then frowns. “Nope.”
Jackson stands staring at me; his body seems tense. Does he already know? He can’t. I’ve not told him and the test was put in a bin.
“You do look awful, Sam,” Jackson finally speaks. “Do you need me to get you anything?” I shake my head. “Well, what is it you need to tell me because I presume it was me Aubrey was talking about?”
“We should sit down,” I say, standing and walking toward the sofa.
“Sam, you’ve got me worried,” Logan says as he moves and stands by the windows, facing me. Jackson joins me on the sofa but keeps his distance.
“Maybe you should go, Logan. This is really between me and Jackson.”
“The hell I will. You look scared, so forgive your big brother for wanting to ensure you’re okay.”
“Sam!” I turn to face Jackson, hearing the pain in the way he says my name. My legs are bouncing and I’m rubbing my hands together as my heart thunders hard against my chest. “What is it?” Jackson asks.
“I’m pregnant.” The words fall from my mouth and tears fill my eyes and then roll slowly down my face.
“He’s got you pregnant!” Logan roars. “I fucking warned you to take care of my sister.”
“Shut up!” I yell at him. “Jackson, say something.”
“No, you can’t be.”
“I am. I’m going for a scan tomorrow and I’d like you there with me.”
He stands and paces the floor. Logan is quietly watching him, and right now, I’m scared that he’s getting ready to pounce on him. I can’t have the two of them fighting. Not again. “When the hell were you going to tell me? Just before you drop?”
“Jackson! Sam’s my sister. You need to tread carefully because you keep this shit up and it won’t end well for you.”
“Listen to who’s talking. I’m not going to take advice from you considering your reaction when Lee announced she was pregnant,” Jackson shouts back at my brother.
Logan flies across the room at him and fists fly. Logan’s phone falls to the floor as they fight, and I grab it and call Fletcher because I don’t know what else to do.
“You have to come and help me.”
“Sam, what’s wrong?” Fletcher asks.
“It’s Jackson and Logan, they’re fighting.”
“At yours?”
“Yes.”
“I’ll be there as soon as I can.”
I hang up and scream at them both to stop, but neither of them listens to me. Logan has Jackson pinned up against the wall and he’s shouting at him, but I can’t hear a word that is being said between them. I back away into the corner because they’re scaring me. I’ve never seen my brother this angry, and as for Jackson, I’m not sure how I should be feeling right now.
“She’s pregnant! What the hell are you going to do?”
“Well, Logan, you tell me. Should I do what you did and run out on the woman I love, even though she’s carrying my baby?”
Love. I focus on that one word and nothing else, because if I’m hearing right, he feels the same as I do. If only we could’ve admitted that to each other. He could be saying that in the heat of the moment to hurt Logan given the fact Logan ran off when Lee told him she was pregnant.
“Will you two stop!” I shout at the top of my voice. They both freeze and turn my way. “This is my home, and if you want to fight, go and do it somewhere there’s no chance of me getting hurt.”
Logan releases Jackson from against the wall and his body relaxes. There’s a cut on his lip and I feel responsible. I turn away from them, and I’m hoping Jackson comes to me, but as the silence continues in the room, it’s looking unlikely that he’ll come to me and offer me comfort.
I try to keep myself together, but the longer he keeps the distance, the harder my tears fall. Loud banging on my front door grabs everyone’s attention. The door opens and in comes Fletcher with Lee.
She walks toward me and wraps me in her arms. “Fletcher, get those two out of here. Logan, Chloe is with Jess. She’ll need looking after tonight.”
“But why?”
“Because I’m staying here with Sam. Go on, get out of here. Jackson, do you have anything to say?” She’s giving him the opportunity to stay, but he doesn’t answer her. He doesn’t even look in my direction as he leaves the flat. She guides me back to the sofa and sits m
e down. I can’t see because my tears are blinding me.
Fletcher asks if there’s anything we need before he leaves. Lee tells him that we will be fine and to let Jess know that she’ll call her tomorrow.
The only person I need right now has walked out of the flat, leaving me behind.
As the front door closes, Lee locks it behind Fletcher. She joins me on the sofa and wraps her arms around me. “It will be okay. Ssh, everything will be fine.”
This time I’m not sure even she believes in her words.
I know I don’t.
Chapter Twenty-Three
“He’s not going to show,” I say to Lee as she sits by my side in the waiting room as I wait to hear my name being called. My nerves must be starting to show. It feels as though my body is trembling, along with my churning stomach, and I could actually be sick.
She holds my hand in a tight grip. Her eyes are full of sorrow and sadness for me. She’s the best person to be with me right now, but I know my situation must remind her to a time involving Logan that she’d rather forget. “If he doesn’t it’s his loss, but just remember that you’re not on your own.”
“Thank you,” I say.
“There’s no need for thanks. We’re family and I’ll always be here to support you. And as for your brother, well, you know he’ll always look out for you and this little one.” She places her free hand on my stomach and smiles. And right here and now, I believe that my family and closest friends will be here for me every step of the journey. Although I’m not sure if it makes me feel better, but I suppose through time it will.
“How did you cope? You know, at the beginning of your pregnancy?” I question her.
“Honestly, I don’t know. The early part is a blur.”
“Yeah, I understand that. Logan was lost.”
“He was, but we found our way together and I have a feeling you and Jackson will be the same.”
Scottish Player: A Hero Club Novel Page 13
