by Lexi Wilson
“That’s incredible!” I exclaimed, grabbing her and pulling her close. “Are you sure? Is this for real?”
“I’ve been sick all week, then I went to the doctor yesterday and he took a blood test. I guess those don’t come back with false results. I’m pregnant,” she said again.
“That’s wonderful!” I pulled her close to me all over again, smothering her face with kisses. I could hardly contain the excitement that welled up inside me, and I wanted to jump for joy. This was the best news I’d had in a long time, and I wanted to shout it from the rooftops.
“You think so?” she asked. She pulled back from me and looked at me in surprise. “You’re not upset or mad or anything?”
“Why would I be mad?” I asked. “My woman is pregnant with my child. This is the happiest day of my life!”
She looked at me like I was crazy, but I couldn’t stop myself from stepping forward and taking her in my arms once more, pulling her close to me and kissing her tenderly.
This time, however, she kissed me back. It was a passionate kiss, her mouth moving over mine, our tongues dancing around each other’s mouths. I wanted to take her to bed and show her how much I loved her there, but I wasn’t going to put that on her with all the other things that were going on.
“I was so afraid you were going to be mad at me, or that you were going to deny it and say that it wasn’t yours,” she said. “I didn’t know how to tell you. It took me all night to come up with the courage to come over here and let you know.”
“I would never leave you or deny that this is my child,” I told her. “I’ve loved you for weeks now, and I’m so happy to know that the two of us are now going to be parents. I want you to promise me right now that you aren’t going to get an abortion. I know this is going to be hard to work through, but we’re going to do it, and I’m going to be there for you every step of the way.”
“I won’t,” she said at last. “But I’m scared. I’m not sure what to do about Kira. She doesn’t know yet – she drove me to the hospital, but I told her they said that it was something wrong with my digestive system and gave me medication for it. I didn’t want to tell her about the baby because I know she’s pissed off about the fact that you and I are still sleeping together even after what happened.”
“Don’t worry about her,” I said, but Zia shook her head.
“You don’t know her like I do. I would want to think that she would never do anything to hurt me, but she can be really vindictive sometimes, and if she learns that you and I are together again, there’s no telling what she might do. I’m scared to death she’s going to go to the board and get me kicked out of school,” she said.
There were tears brimming up in her eyes, and I hushed her as I pulled her close to me.
“I’m not going to let that happen, okay? I’m going to figure this out, and you don’t have to worry about a thing. In fact, you need to get some rest. You are now taking care of yourself and someone else, and I don’t want you to be stressed about anything,” I told her.
“I’m not made of glass,” she said as she wiped her eyes. “I’m just scared you’re going to get fired, or I’m going to get kicked out of school, or both of those things are going to happen and I’m not going to be able to follow my dreams or anything.”
“I’m telling you right now, no matter what, you are going to get that degree, and you’re going to be able to do anything you want to do in life. I know a child is going to make this harder, but I’m going to help you through this. This is my child, too, and I’m not going to leave you to take care of this on your own,” I promised.
“It’s just one more thing to have to worry about on top of everything else that’s gone down,” she shook her head, and I lifted her chin to look into my eyes.
“I know you weren’t expecting this. I wasn’t, either. But, the fact of the matter is that you and I are going to be parents, and we’re going to have to make these choices. I know you’re scared. I’m a little scared, too, but I’m not going to let that stop me from moving forward and being the best dad I can be,” I said. “And I know you’re going to be the best mom there ever was.”
“I don’t know about that,” she said, a blush rushing through her cheeks. “I don’t know the first thing about being a mother, and I’m not sure where to go to even try to figure it out.”
“I know, but that’s why you have to learn,” I said with a laugh. “I’m going to learn, too. You’ve got my full support with this, baby, and I’m going to make sure both of you are taken care of, forever, okay?”
“Okay,” she said, but the expression on her face told me she wasn’t fully ready for any of this. She worried about her roommate, and she worried about school, and now she was worried about what kind of mother she was going to be. I knew stress was terrible for a pregnancy, and it made me worry for the health of the baby growing inside her.
Even if I had just found out the news, I was already falling for this baby. I’d always wanted to be a father, but I never thought it was going to happen. I had such bad luck with women in the past, it was hard to believe I would ever find one to make a family with.
But fate had brought this woman into my life, and now fate had given us a child to raise. I knew there had to be a reason for it, even if now seemed like the worst time in the world for us to bring a baby into the world.
“I’ll tell you what,” I said. “I was going to tell you that I wouldn’t be around the next few days again because I promised my mother I would go visit her when my dad wasn’t around, and that’s going to happen tomorrow. Take a couple days off from class to digest what’s going on in your life and come with me. I would love for you to meet her.”
“Really?” she asked in surprise, looking at me with wide eyes. “You want me to come meet your mom?”
“I know she would love to meet you, and if we tell her that we’re going to have a baby, I would never hear the end of it if I didn’t bring you along to meet her. It’s going to make her life, trust me. What do you say?” I asked. “I want to prove to you that you have all the support in the world. I don’t care what anyone says, I’m going to take care of you, and you have my family on your side, too.”
“Okay,” Zia said with an uncertain smile. “If you really think she’s going to like me.”
“She’s going to love you,” I insisted. “After all, her son fell in love with you, and you’re the mother of her grandchild. Once she gets to meet you and hears the news, you’re going to be the queen in her life.”
For the first time since she came into the room, Zia laughed. It wasn’t much of a laugh, but it was enough to show me she was starting to warm up to the idea herself. This was a lot for both of us to digest, but if we were together, if we were on the same page with what we wanted to do, then I knew we would be able to raise the child and still accomplish what we wanted in life.
I didn’t care how much I had to fight for this. Now, this was what I wanted more than anything else in the world, and I would give it all. I wanted to have a family, and I wanted Zia to be my partner in that family.
We would be parents, and we would raise our child together. Let the world say what they may about us. It wasn’t any of their business, and they didn’t get to decide.
This was our life, and we were building it our way.
Together.
Chapter 25
Zia
“You are absolutely insane! That man is using you! I don’t know why you can’t see it!” Kira followed me down the steps to the sidewalk, then around the back of the car. She didn’t care that Josiah was standing right there. She told him already what she thought of him, and she was willing to say it all again.
“Kira, I know you’re worried about me, but I’m fine, really. Josiah is a good guy. I know this is a little unconventional, but I’m fine, really!” I insisted.
“You think that because he has you brainwashed to think that you are!” she said. “It’s not normal for a student to be with a teache
r, and if this news breaks out, you’re both going to be in a lot of trouble! I don’t want to see that happen to you, Zia!” she said.
“I know you don’t. But you are the only one who knows, and I trust you not to say anything, okay? Please don’t. I don’t want to get in trouble with the school, and I don’t want to have to give up on my dreams. Please,” I held her hands in mine, but I could feel the tension in her grasp.
“I’m only telling you this because I’m worried sick about you,” she said. “You’re still not yourself, and now you’re going to meet his mother? What is this? I thought you regretted the fact that you fucked him again, but now you’re going to take it to the next level?”
“I’m just going to meet his mom, it’s not a big deal,” I insisted. “I’ll be back tomorrow, so don’t worry about me. I’m fine.”
I gave her a hug though she didn’t return it, then I pulled back. “Bye.”
I slid into the passenger seat of the car and fastened my seatbelt, giving her a small wave before I drove off. I knew she was pissed off with me about going to meet Josiah’s mother, but it was my life, and I had to do the right thing for myself.
I still hadn’t told her about the pregnancy. I wasn’t sure how or when I was going to do that, but I knew it was going to have to be soon. I didn’t want her to find out through rumors, and I was sure those were bound to start at some point with the nausea still getting to me.
“You okay?” Josiah asked.
“Yeah,” I said with a nod. “It can be a little hard to deal with her sometimes, but I’m fine.”
“You don’t look like you’re fine,” he said.
“Don’t worry about me,” I smiled. “Just focus on the road and what we’re going to tell your mom when we get there. I’m still hoping she’s not going to be mad at me.”
“She’s not,” he insisted. “She’s going to be the happiest woman on the planet when she finds out she’s going to be a grandparent. Trust me.”
“Okay,” I said. I turned my attention out the window, looking up at the sky rather than at the fences or other cars. Everything was making me nauseous, and if there was anything I could do that could make it easier on myself, I would do it. I didn’t want to worry about how his mother was going to take it, and I didn’t want to worry about Kira telling the school about our relationship.
I just wanted to be happy with the fact I was pregnant and leave it at that. I was going to have to figure out how to tell my own mother without freaking her out about the fact my professor was the father. That was going to be a challenge in and of itself.
But I was going to deal with this one thing at a time. That was the only way I was going to get through this, and I was determined to handle it like an adult.
It wasn’t the most ideal situation, that was for damn sure, but I was going to stay strong.
I had Josiah, after all, and he promised he was going to be there for me. So, I would trust him. I would be open with him and I would do my best to take care of myself and the baby. It was the least I could do, after all. This was my child. Our child.
And I was the one who would carry them.
I did my best to eat the lunch that had been set in front of me at the table, not wanting to be rude. I liked Josiah’s mom. She was a rather quaint person, I thought, but well meaning. I could see why he was closer to her than his father if his father was anything like he described.
They were talking away like a mother and son who hadn’t seen each other in quite some time, and I was glad for the chance to be alone with my thoughts for a few moments. I had done my best to be polite and talk to her about how things were going in my life, but I hadn’t brought up the pregnancy, and neither had Josiah.
I was sure he was waiting for the right moment, but it was just making me nervous. I didn’t want to upset his mother the first time I met her, but I also didn’t know if it would be worse to blurt out the news like I had with her son, or to wait for him to take the lead with it and be the one to tell her himself.
He knew her better than I ever would, and if he hadn’t said anything yet, then perhaps it was better to wait for him to be the one to break the ice. His mother was a talkative woman, and it was difficult to find the time to break into the conversation anyway.
I took a few bites of the soup, doing my best to maintain my nausea. But the longer I thought about the fact we hadn’t said anything to his mother about the baby yet, and the more the soup sat in my stomach, the harder it was for me to control myself.
I started to panic on the inside. I didn’t want to embarrass myself by getting sick at the table. But I also knew it was bad manners to get up and head to the bathroom when I was a guest in someone else’s house. I wasn’t sure what to do or what would be the worse of the two.
Finally, I decided to head for the bathroom, so I politely broke into the conversation.
“I’m so sorry to interrupt,” I said. “But would you mind pointing me in the direction of the bathroom, please?”
“Of course, right that way, first door on the right,” she said with a smile.
I all but bolted from my place at the table, heading down the hall and diving into the bathroom. I did my best not to slam the door behind me, but I didn’t want anyone to hear what was going on in there. The sickness that overtook me was always so violent, and I tried to keep my voice down, but it was hard.
I took care of business as best as I could, then I headed back out to the other room. But, as soon as I opened the door, I was surprised to find his mother standing right outside with a look of concern on her face.
“Have you told him yet?” she asked.
“Told him what?” I replied innocently.
She gave me a knowing smile, looking down at my belly with a slight nod. “Have you?”
It dawned on me that she knew. Of course she did. She was a mother. She knew what it was like to deal with morning sickness. But I wasn’t sure what to say. If Josiah hadn’t said anything yet, then was this too soon?
On the other hand, if she knew that I was pregnant, then there was no reason to hide it from her any longer. Whatever he was waiting for, this felt like an even better time to break the news to her than to wait for just the right moment.
“It’s actually… Well,” I said slowly.
“What?” his mom looked at me with soft eyes.
“It’s Josiah’s baby,” I said at last, unsure of how she was going to respond.
She let out a shout, but she didn’t appear angry. The next thing I knew, I was being wrapped up in a bear hug.
“Bless you!” she cried. Before I had the chance to respond, she rushed out to the kitchen, leaving me in shock. Of course, Josiah said she wasn’t going to be upset, but I still wasn’t used to this sort of reaction to such life-changing news.
I worked up the courage to head back out to the kitchen myself, but his mother wasn’t in the room. Instead, Josiah was sitting in the kitchen alone, eating his lunch. But he turned to me when I walked back in and his face split into the widest smile I had ever seen.
He was always so handsome, but there was something about this smile that told me his mother had told him she knew, and she was clearly happy about the news.
He was right. We were building a family, and I did have the support from him and his mom. This was still scaring the shit out of me, but I felt better about everything knowing that I wasn’t alone in any of this. No matter what anyone else thought now, I at least had two people on my side, and I was going to be okay.
I’d get through this. No, we’d get through this together. We would be together, and we would have our family. It wasn’t what I thought I would be doing at twenty-two years old, but what I thought I was going to do didn’t matter anymore.
I was happy. I was relieved. I felt like I belonged and I wasn’t going to be judged for any of this. It wasn’t planned, but it was okay anyway. Life was scary, but now that I had Josiah on my side, I realized that I didn’t have to take care of any of this alone.
And no matter what happened, everything would be okay.
I understood that now.
Chapter 26
Josiah
It was Wednesday morning, and I was walking back to my office on campus. Zia and I had gotten back home the night before, but she didn’t spend the night at my place. She was tired and still feeling nauseous from the pregnancy, and she wanted to be home and in the comfort of her own bed.
So, I dropped her off after dark, making sure to take her right up to the front of the complex. I wasn’t going to have her walk even one block if she was carrying my child. I knew it was risky, but I was okay with that. This was more important than what anyone might think if they saw me dropping her off.
The couple of days we spent with my mother were nice. I didn’t know if it was because Zia was there, but I didn’t even want to fight with my mother – much. There were always going to be moments of tension with that woman, but I was able to hold my tongue better with the love of my life in the room, and my mom was on better behavior than normal herself.
It was a good couple of days, and felt happy returning to school on Wednesday. There was a skip in my step and a good attitude running through me. I knew it would be hard to shake me that day.
I reached the door of my office, but before I had the chance to go inside, the dean’s secretary came rushing over to me.
“Professor, the dean wants to see you in his office, right now,” she said.
“Tell him I’ll be there in half an hour, I just got here,” I replied. “I need to put down my things and log on to some stuff first.”
“I’m afraid he made it clear you need to be in his office as soon as you arrive at the university today,” she said.
“Did he say what it was about?” I asked. I was glad I was in such a good mood, because I didn’t like dealing with the dean. He was hard to get along with on a good day, but first thing in the morning when I’d been gone for a couple of days wasn’t when I wanted to talk to him.
