I feel like she’s punched me in the stomach. “Okay, so just to be clear. You don’t think I’m making an effort? And you resent being here? I didn’t realise us being able to live in the same building again—and in paradise—was so torturous for you. Do you know how crappy it was having you live with your parents on the other side of town for the last two years, knowing that we could have had a house together? Or coming second to your friends all the time? By the way, what’s stopping you from seeing them now? Or them coming to visit you here?”
A wave of emotion crosses her face: anger, guilt, sadness.
“You have no fucking idea,” she says in a low voice.
“Then why haven’t you tried to talk to me?”
“Because you’re always so damn happy and content with this simple, shitty life.”
“It’s not shitty, and I shouldn’t have to apologise for being happy. But for the record, I do have career aspirations, and they do not involve becoming a ferry driver in Brisbane.”
“Then what? What do you want?”
It’s only then that I acknowledge I haven’t told Lani the extent of my dreams for this place. I guess I was scared she wouldn’t approve—and that she would somehow convince me I wasn’t skilled enough to achieve anything. I mean, I am just a guy who sails boats and supervises the watersports kiosk. It’s not like I’ve taken a hotel management course or ever shown that I’m capable of more.
“I think what I want and what you want are vastly different things. And maybe we’ve been forcing something that doesn’t work.”
She gasps. “Are you breaking up with me?”
“Apparently, I am. I didn’t plan the night that way. In fact, I was hoping that you’d finally get along with Mum and Dinah so I’d have their blessing when I proposed. But now I see getting married is not something we should do.”
She starts tearing up, and it catches me off guard. Lani never cries.
“I love you,” she whispers.
“And I love you too. We just have differing life paths.”
She sits there for a moment and then nods. “I’m going to go.”
“Okay. We can talk again later if you want.”
She leaves without acknowledging me further, and I sigh.
That was the worst feeling in the world.
But I know it was the right thing to do.
FIFTEEN
Emily
Oh my God. I am never drinking again.
I wake up in Sasha’s sister’s living room. I was sleeping on the couch, but I somehow rolled onto the floor during the night. My neck hurts, and my head is throbbing.
I lost track of how much I drank last night, and all because I saw one photo of Seb on an old friend’s Facebook account.
I know Sasha would think I was crazy if she knew how affected I still am by him. Even I think I’m crazy.
Throughout the evening, I speculated every possible reason that Seb would be on Alexis’s Facebook account, from her accidentally running into him at a party to hiring him as a model like Sasha suggested. And then there was the more obvious reason: that they’re friends, or even lovers.
The idea of Alexis sleeping with Seb made me spiral into a dark place. I can’t even work out if it’s because she used to be a friend or just a woman who has their life together more than me.
I notice a glass of water on a nearby coffee table and grab it, gulping it down. My stomach churns in response. Ugh. Whatever was in that blue stuff last night was lethal.
I hear some shuffling behind me. “Morning.” Sasha plonks down on the couch, looking as rough as I feel.
I grunt in return.
“Exactly,” she says. “My tolerance must have dropped recently because I can usually have a night like that and be fine the next day.”
“I haven’t had a night like that in…I actually can’t remember.”
In Canada, Ryan and I partied a lot, but no hangover felt as bad as this one does. I blame the emotional trauma piled on top.
“It’s good for you,” Sasha says. “Builds character.”
“I don’t know about that.”
She looks at her watch. “We have to be back at the marina in an hour. I say we go find somewhere that will give us bacon and eggs.”
I can’t decide if food would make me feel better or worse right now.
“Is your sister home?” I ask.
“Yeah, don’t you remember trying to get into bed with her last night?” she asks, grinning.
“No! I didn’t, did I?”
“It’s cool. She didn’t mind. I mean, she wouldn’t have shared her bed, but she’s used to me doing stuff like that.”
“I’ll have to apologise.”
“Don’t worry about it. We’ll let her sleep in this morning, and you can say sorry next time. She’s easily bought with earrings and scented candles.”
I stumble to my feet. “Do I have time for a shower before we go?”
“As long as you make it quick.”
“Okay. I’ll be back in five. Maybe ten.”
She laughs. “Off you go.”
I pick up my bag and drag myself to the bathroom. Somehow, I remember where that is.
I strip off and start the shower. And then I suddenly realise that the only way for me to get home is via a forty-minute boat ride.
I hope the ocean is calm today.
***
Noah
I sleep horribly. Knowing that Lani is in her bedroom directly above me and that we’re no longer together seems weird and keeps me awake, wondering if she’s okay.
But after some careful prodding around in my brain, I’m confident I made the right decision to break up with her. I was forcing the relationship…trying to make our goals fit together when they clearly didn’t.
I get up and put on some clothes before heading downstairs. I’m not going to chase Lani this morning. We’ll need a little space, and then maybe later we can establish some sort of platonic relationship. I wonder if she’ll stay on the island. I now question whether I was the primary motivator for her returning, or if it was the money and promise of power.
I make my way along the path towards the villa where Mum and Dinah are staying. I’ll check on them before I head back to Mackay to visit Kai, the boat mechanic, and pick up Emily and Sasha.
I’m just passing the building where the construction crew are temporarily staying when I notice someone tiptoeing out the front door. Lani.
She’s barefoot and still wearing the same dress as last night. Her hair is a mess.
My first instinct is to call out, but I don’t know if she’d appreciate it.
I know I shouldn’t judge, but the idea of her hooking up with one of those guys last night, immediately after breaking up with me, makes me feel sick.
Of course, she might have just asked to sleep there instead of being in the same building as me. I’m not going to jump to conclusions.
And then the door to the building opens again. Pete, one of the guys on the crew, comes out and calls to Lani. She turns and smiles. He goes over and cups her face in his hands, kissing her on the mouth.
Bile rises in my throat. It’s been less than twelve hours since we broke up and she’s already moved on.
I walk loudly past them, avoiding eye contact as I continue on to see Mum and Dinah. I hear Lani say “oops” and giggle when she spots me. Classy.
There’s no way we’ll be establishing a platonic relationship for a while.
If ever again.
***
I avoid talking to Mum and Dinah about the details of what I just witnessed and keep the conversation light and breezy. I make them each a coffee and tell them to enjoy the downtime. They’re easily entertained by walks on the beach or reading a book on the deck, so I don’t have to worry about them being bored while I’m gone.
The whole way back to Mackay, I can’t stop thinking about Lani kissing Pete. And it’s not even as if I’m jealous of him. It’s more that Lani has such little regard for t
he three years we spent together that she could easily go out and be with a guy she barely knows the minute we’re over.
And what if this wasn’t the first time she’d been with him? She’s always been a secretive person, having her phone locked and facing down at all times. And she would often be vague about any time we were apart. Could that be why she refused to live with me when we were on the mainland? But then why talk about settling down and moving to Brisbane together if she wasn’t serious? I’m so confused.
I reach the marina and tie up the boat. My meeting with Kai shouldn’t take long—he just wants to ask a couple of questions and give me some paperwork to take back to Cal.
I wonder how Emily and Sasha fared last night. Hopefully, they had more fun than me. Although, that would have to be a given. Unless one of them ended up getting hit by a car and landing in hospital, anything would be more fun than what I endured.
I find Kai in his work shed slightly farther down the marina.
“How’s it going, dude?” he asks when he sees me.
“I’ve had better mornings, but I’ll be fine.”
“I hear ya. I have the world’s biggest hangover. Unexpected night out at Marley’s. Ran into a couple of chicks from the island, actually. Sasha and the new girl…Emily?”
“Oh, yeah? I’m picking them up this morning. Sounds like a crazy evening.” I don’t know why, but I feel even more depressed knowing that they were living it up, probably flirting up a storm…
Crap. I need to stop this pity party. I can’t wish everyone ill just because I’m in a bad mood. And what do I care if Emily and Sasha are flirting with other people? They’re great women. They deserve to be happy.
“Why don’t you text them and tell them to meet you here? That way we can hang out and you don’t have to rush off. I suspect Emily in particular will be a bit slow to get started today.”
“Oh?”
“Yeah, she was on a mission to obliterate whatever was going on in that head of hers.”
“Did she seem upset?”
“I’m not sure. Something was bothering her, though.”
I suddenly feel bad that I even vaguely wanted Emily to have a lousy time last night. I didn’t. But I do worry what happened to make her feel that way.
“Okay, cool. Yeah, I’ll do that.” I get out my phone and text Sasha what Kai suggested.
She writes back. No problem. See you soon!
“So, how’s the cat going?” I ask.
“She’s good. She’ll be ready by the eleventh, I think. I just wanted to check if you’re okay with me using a different upholstery company to the one you initially requested. I can get a better deal from a guy I’ve used before.”
“Yeah, that’s fine. Thanks for trying to keep everything on budget.”
“No problem. You want to see her?”
“Sure.”
We walk over to the catamaran I know like the back of my hand and climb on. It has two levels, with all the seating inside downstairs, and a mixture of indoor and outdoor benches on top. The tourists who bring kids across to the island usually like to sit outside and get sprayed by the waves.
Man, I miss that. Feeling their excitement and being able to contribute to a happy life-long memory.
I do a quick inspection, knowing I’ll be doing a more official one once everything’s complete.
“You’ve done a great job, Kai.”
He smiles. “I know. But it’s nice to hear you say it.”
We go back to the shed, and moments later, Sasha appears in the doorway.
“Hello, boys,” she says in a sultry voice. And then she cracks up laughing. “Sorry, I’ve always wanted to do that.”
“You’re perky,” I observe. “Where’s Emily?”
“She’s just outside standing near the jetty. She said the smell of boat fuel was making her queasy.”
“Yikes. Kai here was just telling me about your big night.”
“Yep. That’s how we roll.”
“I’ll just grab some paperwork, and I’ll meet you at the boat.”
“Sounds good.”
She totters off, and I contemplate the ride back. The ocean is not smooth.
That’s going to be a big problem for Emily.
SIXTEEN
Emily
Holy crap.
Even just looking at the boat bobbing up and down in front of me is making me want to puke. I haven’t actually thrown up today, but I feel like it’s only a matter of time. It would be horrifying to be sick in front of Sasha and Noah, so I’m determined to do whatever it takes to avoid it.
They both suddenly appear, as if me thinking their names has summoned them to me. I think I might still be drunk. Sasha and I stopped at a café for breakfast, but I couldn’t get down more than a piece of dry toast. I have no idea how Sasha managed a big breakfast, complete with sausages and beans.
I glance at Noah, embarrassed. “I apologise in advance for being a mess,” I say.
He laughs. “Don’t worry. I’ve seen worse.” He looks like he’s going to say something else but changes his mind.
“I find that hard to believe.”
“If you like, we can hang around town for a while? Wait until you feel a little better?”
“That’s a lovely offer, but I think we need to get back so I can curl up in my room and die.”
Sasha rubs my back. “You’ll be fine. Once we return to the island, I’ll mix you up some hair of the dog.”
“Oh, God. Please, no.”
“Here, let me help you onto the boat.” Noah reaches his arm out, and I grip it, noting through my foggy brain how nice it feels. I imagine being wrapped up against that warm, strong chest…
Okay. I am definitely still drunk. But also, he’s the first guy to be nice to me since I was reminded of Seb. It makes sense that I’d be craving male attention. I know Kai was nice to me last night, but he ended up making out with one of the women working behind the bar at some club we went to. And I wasn’t far enough gone to want to share a guy with anyone else.
I settle down into the boat as low as I can go and rest my head in my hands. Maybe if I keep my eyes closed and breathe deeply, the next forty minutes will pass quickly.
But as soon as Noah starts the boat, I know that’s not going to be the case.
I hear Sasha get in, and she whispers in my ear. “You okay, babe?”
“Can’t talk. I need all my energy not to puke.”
“Well, we are on the ocean. It’s allowed.”
“Not in front of colleagues, it’s not.”
She chuckles. “I don’t think I have any colleagues who haven’t seen me throw up.”
“And I promise I won’t judge you. Much,” Noah teases.
I groan in response.
We take off across the water. I can already tell it’s choppy, even in the protected part of the harbour. Once we get out into open ocean, it only gets worse. I feel every wave we crest and every trough we crash into.
But I use all my determination to maintain the little dignity I have left.
It feels like an eternity, but we finally slow down as we reach the island. At least I didn’t have to worry about Sasha and Noah talking about me the whole trip since Noah was behind me and Sasha was in front.
As soon as I get back to the staff quarters, I’m going to tuck myself under the covers of that awful squeaky bed and sleep for the rest of the weekend.
Noah helps me off the boat, but by this time I’m half comatose, so I don’t have time to appreciate his touch again. I start hobbling up the jetty towards reception.
But unfortunately, the change from the ocean to dry land aggravates my stomach further, and I suddenly can’t contain it. I bolt over to a nearby potted plant and throw up.
After a few seconds, I stand upright and take a couple of shaky breaths.
Actually, I feel a lot better now. I never believe people when they say they feel better after puking, because I’m not sick very often, and I usually still feel l
ike death if I’ve hurled. But this time, I get it.
And as a bonus, Noah and Sasha are still down near the boat, so they didn’t see.
Someone clears their throat behind me, making me jump.
I slowly turn around and notice a large man in his fifties standing nearby, staring at me. He’s wearing an expensive suit and a disgusted expression.
“Uh, sorry. I got a little seasick on the way here,” I lie. I have no idea who he is. A friend or family member of one of the staff?
“Who are you?” he demands.
“Emily.” I don’t elaborate.
“Emily who? What are you doing on my island?”
Shit. This is Bruce?
“Emily McIntosh. The new night manager,” I say in a small voice.
“Well, Emily McIntosh, I don’t appreciate my staff vomiting on my property. It’s clear you are unsuited to a role that requires travel by sea. You’re fired.”
I stand there, stunned. “But…”
“No excuses. I’m on my way to see Calvin, and I’ll be informing him of this development. Good day.”
He walks off, and I burst into tears.
I am so, so stupid.
***
Even though I would love nothing better than to fall asleep and never wake up, I figure I’ll have to pack all my stuff and leave. I stumble back to the staff quarters, ignoring everyone I see on the way, and start shoving clothes into my suitcases.
What am I going to do? Where am I going to go? My dad still hasn’t called me, so that probably means he isn’t interested in seeing me. I don’t blame him. I wouldn’t want to see me either.
And after finding out what the three women I knew in Brisbane are up to, it confirms that I am on a completely different path to them. Although, what my path is supposed to be is unclear at this point. Homelessness? I haven’t received my first pay from my job here yet, and it’s unlikely Bruce will approve it, considering what he thinks of me.
Welcome to Coco Bay Page 9
