by Ammar Habib
For as long as I’ve known Cap, he’s always been a cleanly shaven man. But his face is covered in a stubble today morning.
Shortly after joining us in the living room, Cap breaks the silence. “How are you feeling?”
“…tired, but restless.”
He slightly smiles. “You’re probably just hung over on the nerves of it all. Every soldier goes through it.”
“Yeah… probably.”
“Thank God you got out of it all okay.”
There’s a moment of awkward silence before Ben speaks. “What you did last night is all the news is reporting. You’ve even got the entire FBI talking. Of course, we’ll keep your name under wraps from the press.”
There’s a brief silence.
“Ana…” Ben pauses. “I’ve been doing this for a long time. But you are the most foolhardy and bravest cop or agent that I’ve ever seen. I don’t know of another person who would have charged into the lion’s den like you. And to come out in one piece is something else.”
I nod in appreciation. I guess that’s his way of saying ‘thank you’.
“Rest assured, we’ve got Ebony,” Ben continues. “That confession ties everything else together. She’ll get life in prison. No matter how much information she’s willing to dish out, we won’t let her get off. As we speak, we’re having agents and officers pick up her lieutenants. They already have an angle on her. Queen Bee—along with her organization—is history.”
“I hope you can follow through on the promise,” I reply. “She’s hurt a lot of good people.”
“We will.”
Cap looks over at me. “You can take as long as you need, Ana. But whenever you’re ready, you’ll have a lot of options. A lot of people have heard about what you did. The governor himself wants to talk to you, and I bet it’ll be more than just a simple congratulations.”
“I’ve spoken to my own superiors about you,” Ben adds. “And they say there is a place in the FBI for you if you want it. You may actually be receiving a letter from my bosses soon.”
I slightly nod without saying anything.
They stay for a little while longer. They talk, but it’s more among themselves and with Bryan. They can see that I’m not all there and respect that enough. I hear Bryan promise them to stay by my side for today. After a few minutes, they finally depart.
My partner and I sit there for a long time without saying a word. The only sound is the ticking of the clock behind us. Bryan waits patiently as last night’s events replay in my head over and over again. I see it all: the faces, the onslaught, Ebony’s fear. It happened only a few hours ago, but it already feels like a distant dream.
“It’s over…” I whisper. “It’s all finally…over.”
Bryan is slow to respond. “You did it, Ana. Your sister can rest in peace now.”
Slowly, I look away from the floor and at him. “I don’t think the dead care about vengeance. Neither Angela nor Jack.” I pause. “Maybe we’ve just been doing this to ourselves.”
“Maybe…” He thinks for a moment. “When all the ceremonies are done, do you know what you want now?”
“No…”
“You don’t need to do this anymore. You finished what you set out to do.”
“I did… didn’t I? And through it all, you were at my side, Bryan. I would have never made it far without you. You were always there… thank you.”
He smiles without saying a word.
I take a deep breath. “With Ebony gone, I don’t know if I have the drive for this anymore. I did it all for Angela. But I don’t know what to do next.” There’s a brief silence. “But before I do anything else, there’s something we both have to take care of.”
***
For the first time, I show Bryan the room that has been dedicated to Angela’s death. He’s sees the web of facts that surround my beautiful sister’s face. He sees the countless questions that are taped to the wall and all the arrows that crisscross one another. He now understands what has been driving me for all this time.
It has served its purpose. For the past months, it constantly reminded me why I was doing all this. It kept the motivation in front of me every day. But now, we both know what we need to do. It’s the only thing left to do before I can fully move on with my life. We don’t say anything—there’s nothing that needs to be said. He knows why I’m showing this to him.
We take it down together. I don’t cry. I don’t hesitate. I don’t even second-guess myself. It’s time. With every action, I sense Angela’s smile. It seems to grow stronger with each thing that is stripped from the wall. It happens so fast. Soon, there is nothing there except for her picture. But I know that it has to go too. Angela has been at peace since she left this world. Now, it’s time that I let go. It’s time that I have my peace.
This alone won’t do it. But it’ll be a good start. Good enough.
***
When mama opens the front door, she can hardly believe that it’s me standing there. She lets out a quick gasp and covers her mouth. I had an entire speech prepared to tell her how sorry I was. To tell her what a fool I was for pushing her away and to tell her that I would never do it again. But when I see her eyes and her glowing face, I can’t say a word. Instead, my eyes say it all.
A smile suddenly spreads across her face. It’s bigger and more joyous than any I’ve ever seen. It’s followed by tears streaming down her face. In that moment, there is light back in my life. I’m suddenly in her arms.
And for the first time in years, our family feels whole again.
***
From afar, I watch as Bryan and Mary sit on a park bench. It’s been months since they’ve seen each other, but the fact that she agreed to meet him here says something. Actually, it says almost everything. And the fact that they’re holding hands only amplifies it.
The park is nearly empty on this weekday morning. The skies are clear and a beautiful sun shines down on the couple. It all seems too perfect. There are even birds chirping. Or maybe that’s just my mind playing tricks on me.
I can’t help but smile. I’ve seen Bryan go from the tough, no-nonsense cop to a friend. And now, we’ve both changed each other’s lives for the better. On this journey to make myself feel whole again, I never thought about what my actions might do. But it now turns out that maybe I’ve played a small part in helping another family reunite as well.
And that alone makes it all worth it.
***
It’s been a couple of weeks since Ebony went down. She’s been more than willing to tell the FBI everything she knows. Apparently, her elderly father could be implicated in a couple of her crimes. But for her testifying, the FBI will leave him out of this and let him live out the rest of his cancer-sickened life in a retirement home.
Ebony will be receiving the death penalty, even after confessing to everything. But she’ll have a lot of her friends with her on Death Row. It’ll be a nice final reunion for the lot of them.
I’ve been invited to the governor’s office next week. I received a letter from him—hand written—congratulating me. But he wants to meet me in person to give me an award and talk about a new job. I even received the letter from Ben’s boss. Ben has been promoting me to his colleagues and department, making his superior keen on speaking with me. However, I’m not even sure if I want to do anything with law enforcement anymore though.
Bryan and Mary have started seeing a counselor now. They even moved back in with one another. Both of them realized how much they need each other and are trying to make it work. I think they will. Kevin was ecstatic when he saw his dad finally return home. This time, they’ll be starting everything on the right foot. They both know what’s most important.
My brother and sister-in-law have started making preparations for their upcoming arrival. It’ll be a baby girl. They already have a name picked out. It’s a name that only an angel could ever have. There’ll be a baby shower in a couple of weeks, and I would not miss it for the world.
But I doubt that my mom will let me out of her sight for that long after getting me back. I think she knows now. Maybe not the specifics, but she understands that I’ve done what I had to do. She knows that I lied to her. She may not know the full truth, but I don’t think she cares.
I’ve even started going back to church. My parents didn’t force me. In fact, they were surprised to wake up one Sunday and find me getting ready to go. And when I did go, I didn’t feel anything there but bliss. I’ve finally truly come home.
Ever since reuniting with my parents, I’ve been living with them. I sleep in Angela’s old room—something I could never imagine doing even a few weeks ago. The room is just the same as it always was, down to the very wall paper. Yellow was always her favorite color and it’s growing on me now.
Normally, I sleep like a baby every night. But slumber stays far away tonight. It’s not nightmares. I haven’t had those in days now. It’s just the knowledge that I’ll soon need to decide what to do next. There are so many roads at my feet that I don’t know which way to step. It’s as if there is no perfect path for me anymore.
I don’t know what brings me to do so, but when midnight rolls around, I find myself rummaging through Angela’s old stuff. This isn’t the first time I’ve looked through it. I don’t know what I expect to find or what brought me to do his. Maybe it’s just restlessness.
Going through a chest, I look past many of Angela’s old toys: dolls, stuffed animals, play sets, and so much more. These were things that she had once intended to pass down to me. But I didn’t dare touch them after she left us.
My hand grazes something unfamiliar. I grasp it with my fingers and pull it out. It’s a letter. I’ve been through this chest a hundred times and have never seen it. And my heart nearly stops when I see who it’s addressed to:
FOR MY BEAUTIFUL SISTER
Why have I never seen this before? Cautiously, I pull the note out of the envelope. It smells just like her. My hands are unconsciously shaking as they hold it. This can’t really be happening. I must be dreaming.
I unfold the letter and stare at the note. It’s in her handwriting. The ink has faded, but the words remain clear. And within two sentences, tears are streaming down my face. My sobs consume the closet and my heart begins to race with a mix of joy, sorrow, and hope.
Ana,
My dear sister. You’ll never know how much I love you. The more I help those less fortunate than me, the more my eyes are opened. I hear their stories and have seen things that I will never share with anyone else.
You’re growing into a beautiful young woman. One day, you’ll have the world in your hands. I know it. And when that day comes, you may come to learn what I have learned. You and I have lived in light, but there is much darkness and evil in the world. I’ve learned that you can’t have both innocence and justice. I pray that you choose innocence. I pray that you choose to live your entire life in the light. It is by far the more convenient choice. But if you feel led, then choose the latter.
Choose to make the world a better place.
***
The sun is only halfway above the horizon when I stand at the foot of Angela’s tombstone. I take a deep breath as I run my hand along the curved top. It feels like an eternity since I last stood here. Last time, I was so lost. I made the vow to do whatever it took to bring down criminals: lie, cheat, steal, and even kill. I’ve done all of those. I now realize how close I was to crossing a line on that day. It was a line that I never would have been able to come back from.
But now… now everything seems so clear.
“I’m sorry if I ever disappointed you, Angela.” I take a deep breath. “It wasn’t Ebony who tore me apart—she’s not the one who plunged me onto the dark path… I did that myself. But… I now know what my guiding star is. It’s always been there for me. I just needed to open my eyes to see it.”
I smile.
“It’s you. It’s always been you.” I pause for a moment. “And I’ve made my choice, Angela. I’ve seen the light and I’ve seen the darkness. I’ve walked the line between them. And now, I’ve made the choice. Not the choice that you prayed I would make… but the one that will make you proud. And the one I’ve been called to do.”
About the Authors
Ammar Habib
Ammar Habib is an award-winning and bestselling author who was born in Lake Jackson, Texas in 1993. Ammar enjoys crafting stories that are not only entertaining, but will also stay with the reader for a long time. Ammar presently resides in his hometown with his family, all of whom are his biggest fans. He draws his inspiration from his family, imagination, and the world around him.
Other works by Ammar include:
Dark Guardian
Dark Guardian: A New Dawn
Dark Guardian: Legends
Memories of My Future
To learn more about Ammar, please visit:
www.ammarahsenhabib.com
Glenda Mendoza
Glenda Mendoza has two decades of law enforcement experience serving in the Greater Houston Area. She has served in many capacities, including working as a Deputy Jailor, Patrol Officer, Narcotics Investigator, Special Investigative Unit Agent, involving various vice investigations and a District Attorney Investigator. Her experiences helped keep this novel authentic and ensured that Ana Rocha’s character remained true to life. Glenda currently works as a Threat Management Detective, working mental health investigations and criminal investigations involving threats of danger.
