by T. C. Clark
He didn’t break eye contact as he walked to her bedroom. He was giving her time to change her mind. She knew that he couldn’t say the words to release her from the carnal promise building between them, but he would stop if she asked him to.
He laid her down gently on the bed and took her mouth again, this time letting his hands roam over her body as he did so. She moaned as he found the sensitive flesh between her legs and stroked.
When she whimpered he tilted his head back to catch her eyes. He stood then and removed his clothes. Her eyes widened as each perfectly muscled part of his body was revealed.
Muscles bulged everywhere. When he took his pants off she gasped at how well endowed he was. She was no shrinking violet, but damn he was big. Her nerves spiked as she got a full look at his body.
When he bent down and got a gold and black wrapped condom from his pocket she tensed. But he didn’t put it on he laid it on the side table next to her bed.
As his massive body settled over hers, she thought about all of the reasons why this shouldn’t be happening and then let them drift away from her mind. She’d made a choice tonight and she wouldn’t start regretting it now.
Dmitri tried to calm his nerves. He wanted to plunge into Eden and ease this hunger that had been plaguing him since the day they’d met. He wanted her body wrapped around his while he took what he wanted from a woman that belonged to him.
The primal thoughts kept repeating in his mind. He pushed her body back against the bed with his own letting her feel his strength. Eden’s gentle hands moved up his muscled arms to cup his face.
She pulled him down to her wanting their bodies as close as possible. This time she took his mouth using her tongue to lap at his. His fingers tangled in her hair to anchor her to him. The sexy little sounds she was giving him made his blood boil.
They devoured each other. He wanted to taste the center of her, but he knew he couldn’t, not this first time. When she came he wanted to be buried deep inside of her right where he belonged.
For a time they stayed like that, locked in a moment of discovery. He only moved when her legs tightened around his hips and she bucked against him.
He knew he was done. Her sharp nails bit into his back as if holding him there. He grabbed the condom off of the nightstand and took his time putting it on.
She moaned when his hand found her again. He played with her gently needing her to be as slick as possible before he took her. He was big and as much as he wanted her, he was sure once he was inside he wouldn’t be able to be gentle. His need was too great.
He brought his slick fingers up to his mouth and licked them.
“Later when I have better control I’m going to spend hours tasting you, but right now I can’t wait,”
“Dmitri.” She moaned at the erotic images he brought to her mind. “Please, I need more.”
He used his legs to widen hers. He positioned his cock at her entrance. She was wet and ready. He shuddered as he entered her. She closed around him like a snug sheath. He felt her tense, but he pushed forward.
He kept his eyes trained on hers tracking her response. He knew when the pleasure touched pain because she grimaced.
“Just a little more…give me a little more,” he whispered against her lips just before he took them again. Once she started kissing him back he moved lower letting his tongue taste her throat and headed down to sample her melon sized breasts.
She moaned loudly when he took a dark brown nipple in his mouth and suckled. He pulled so strongly that she gasped. Her body arched under his and he thrust home. Once he was fully seated he gave her a moment to adjust to his size.
“You’re big, Dmitri,” she whispered.
“I’m sorry, Eden.”
She smiled at the frown on his face. He held himself above her body with strong arms. His body growing slick with sweat. She forced her body to relax and submit to the invasion. Once he felt it, he moved.
Hot iron in pure silk. He thrust repeatedly each one more brutal than the last. The animal inside his soul taking over with each movement. Lust built in his veins and rushed through his body. He angled his hips, adjusting his movements, reacting to her body’s movements.
When she started to tense he slowed his thrusts until her body started to relax again. Only when he could slide easily once again did he start to increase his pace. This wasn’t going to be a quick lay. He meant to imprint himself on her very soul.
After this…there would only be each other.
“Dmitri?” she whispered and he felt her womb starting to tighten again.
“We need to make this last as long as we can. We only get the first time once,” he groaned. His body rutting over hers lost in feeling.
When she lifted her hips and drew him deeper he knew the game was over. Unable to resist his body began to thrust uncontrollably, harder and harder until she arched under him, convulsing with the strength of her release contracting so tightly around him that he came. He ground his hips deep wanting to release deep in her, wishing this was skin to skin.
She whimpered under him as she continued to ride the waves of pleasure. He leaned down and took her lips again, this time slow and gentle. No matter what happened next he would never forget this moment between them. His instincts had been spot on. This explosion between them made whatever happened before with other women pale in comparison.
She looked sleepy. Her dark brown eyes held the same shock that his undoubtedly reflected. He should let her rest. She had to be tired and drained after the day she had. But he shook away the thought.
He couldn’t stop, not tonight. He needed to be connected to her, to draw the binds tighter between them. He was already in her life on a professional level, she’d let him in easily there…now he needed to be on her mind during the quiet moments of the day.
He needed her to want him as desperately as he wanted her. Because he knew eventually this relationship would be tested. His past always caught up to him. Now that he’d tasted her, lived what he already believed, he didn’t want to give her up.
He reached over the side of the bed holding her eyes giving her a chance to deny him. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a box of condoms and laid them on the side table.
Her vulnerable eyes searched his and she must have found whatever she was looking for because she relaxed under him giving him her trust. Gently he moved over her and took what belonged to him. He wondered if she knew how much their relationship was changing on this night. After this there was no going back to what they were before.
* * *
A few months later….
Eden dropped a dish for the third time and ignored Devonte’s concerned look. This was starting to get ridiculous. Dmitri was waiting for her to close up and for the first time since she’d met him she wished he would go away. Not forever…but just for a moment so she could collect her thoughts.
Their relationship although brief was becoming everything to her. He was everywhere. It was as if he was trying to enchant her with his presence. No one had ever showed her this kind of attention.
She’d never been this close to anyone and now she had a bombshell living in her belly. When she’d gone to her annual gynecologist appointment pregnancy wasn’t even on the agenda. In their time together they had made love more than she thought humanly possible, but only once had they forgotten protection.
It was the night after Mina had finally come home to do her surgery with a possessive former lover in tow. It was something about seeing such a beautiful life hanging in the balance that had made her the aggressor that night.
She’d wanted him on her, in her. Their lovemaking had been cathartic and protection hadn’t even crossed her mind and now here she was trying to figure out how to tell a man that she was pretty sure she was in love with, that she was having his baby.
She’d spent the last week setting up the finishing touches for Mina’s wedding. Tomorrow was her friend’s big day and as maid of honor her focus should be on her.
She should be celebrating not struggling with this secret looming in the back of her mind.
Surprisingly, she wasn’t worried about his reaction. Some instinct told her he would be happy, but they still had too many unanswered questions between them.
First getting him to talk about his past was like pulling teeth. He would only reveal small parts when pushed. Yet as he spoke he always watched her carefully as if monitoring her reaction.
She’d let it go like a lot of women did when they wanted to have their cake and eat it too. Every action he took with her showed her he wouldn’t intentionally hurt her, but there was more than one way to destroy someone.
She looked around her kitchen at everything she’d built. When she’d reached rock bottom in her life she’d somehow found the strength to stand up and walk away from it. Her hand went protectively to her baby.
She would protect this child. She would do whatever was necessary to keep it safe. She’d survived hell once before so she knew she had strength to do it again. Tonight she would tell Dmitri about the baby and in turn she would make him tell her about his past.
Whatever happened, whatever the outcome, she would survive it. She wiped off her hands and walked over to the door unable to stop her heart from pounding when she saw Dmitri standing at the door talking with Devonte. From the way Dmitri’s eyes caught hers Devonte must have been talking about her. He’d been worried about her spacing out all day.
She squared her shoulders and walked over to them. She could do this, but boy, she didn’t want to lose Dmitri now. She’d wanted a man like him for so long, someone that wanted only her. But dreaming was for children and right now she needed the truth. She pasted a fake smile on her face and took his arm.
Dmitri looked at the weird smile on Eden’s face and nodded towards Devonte. Apparently, she’d been acting different all day. He braced himself for what was about to come.
The last few months had only enhanced his desire for her. He’d never known how much he craved this closeness with someone, but now that he’d experienced it, he didn’t want to give it up.
They walked home in silence. He’d been coming to her house every day since their first full night together. Both remained silent as they made their way up her stairs, each one dreading the conversation to come.
She walked over to the couch and took a seat. She didn’t have to ask him to join her. He followed her easily, as if pulled by some magnetic thread that linked them.
“What is it, Eden? Tell me what’s wrong,” he asked, his dark blue eyes filled with worry.
“I’m in love with you, Dmitri.”
“Eden…” His voice trailed off as he digested her words.
“No, I have a lot to say, so please don’t stop me. I didn’t expect to meet someone like you and I damn sure didn’t expect to fall for you. But here I am, vulnerable again. But for me, falling in love with you was a blessing. Honestly, I didn’t think I could do that anymore. When I went through everything with Matt I thought for sure I’d never let anyone close to me again. Hell, I promised myself I wouldn’t. But you were so different, so kind, I didn’t see you coming,” she said with a small smile.
Unable to stop himself, he kissed her, a gentle loving with his mouth. He knew she was going to say more, but he had to taste her again, especially after hearing that she loved him.
“I’m pregnant,” she announced ignoring the way he stiffened.
“That’s what I thought.” He nodded his head mostly to himself. She’d been throwing up lately and also showing signs of exhaustion. He’d started to wonder if she was pregnant.
“I don’t know what that means to you, but it’s everything to me. I’m having this baby and if you want to be a part of its life, I would love that. But I have to know more about you, the real stuff, Dmitri. Not the bits and pieces you give me, but the hard stuff. My love for you will not stop me from doing right by my child. I need to know that you deserve to be a part of this baby’s life.”
“I don’t deserve any of this. Not a good woman, not a baby. But I want it. Eden, my past… I will tell you all of it and if you can’t let it go I understand. But I will not leave or just disappear from your life. I love you too. I don’t really know exactly what that means, but I know it’s not pretty or weak. I’m not walking away from you or our child.”
“Dmitri, you may not have a choice,” she cautioned.
“No, everyone has a choice. Most people make the easy one. I would never try to force you to be with me, but I wouldn’t walk away either. I’ve never had this, Eden… this closeness, having someone that worries if I eat or how I feel. I will not give this up. My life has been hard. I told you how my childhood was, but I didn’t tell you how lonely it was to have no one for so long. When I joined the Federal Security Service I thought I was finally finding my family. Within that service there was a separate, private organization called the Red House. I was recruited to it because of my skills with computers and my ability to get things done. I did that job for a long time.”
“What was your job with them?” she asked trying to imagine Dmitri in the Russian version of police.
“I was head of the counterterrorism branch focusing on cyber security.” He hesitated, stood up and started to pace.
“That doesn’t sound that bad.”
“You don’t know the things I’ve done for my country,” he said looking away.
“Did you hurt people?”
“Yes, I did…a lot of them. I’ve spent a long time coming to terms with what they made me during that time. My government called and I answered. It wasn’t until a long time later that I realized that my job couldn’t be my home and that every mission wasn’t built to benefit the country. I spent two years destroying them. I wasn’t a good man then, but I’m trying to be now.”
“Dmitri, how did you get out?”
“If I tell you how, Eden you can’t ever repeat it. I mean it, not to your friends, not even once. I can’t protect us if you do. Do you understand? This secret you want to know could kill our kid.”
She paused and wondered if she really wanted to know. She trusted herself; she wouldn’t do anything to put her child in danger. From all of the information Dmitri already gave her, she believed he was telling the truth. She’d seen him at work on his computer more than once, fingers flying over the keyboard creating streams of code that impressed even her most prestigious Tech customer. But she had to know everything; she’d learned long ago that ignorance was not bliss.
“Yes, Dmitri. I understand, and I still want to know.”
“I joined a club called the Sanctuary. It’s a place where defectors can go and depend on each other to stay safe. All of us are paid a yearly salary and given one job to complete for the organization. In return we are given one gold card for every year we are in it to request the unquestioned help of another member. I protect all of their financial accounts and host a secure forum for all of the members to meet on.”
“I’m surprised you are telling me all of this,” she said fear coloring her voice.
“As the mother of my child you’re now a part of this. I can’t not tell you everything. If anything happens to me the Sanctuary will be the people I send to protect you.”
“Do you think anything will happen to you?” she asked quietly. She didn’t know what to think about everything he’d told her, but she knew she didn’t want anything to happen to him.
“I have to be careful. I destroyed everything before I left the Red Hose, but there was some information that has come out that leads me to believe that someone is running it again. I need you to know that I’ve been preparing for this for a while. If anything happens to me you will be safe. I’ve made very specific arrangements with a member I trust.”
Eden went quiet as she tried to make sense of everything he was saying. He was a former assassin who worked for the Russian government. He defected to the Sanctuary. This man was going to be the father of her child. How in the world had she managed to get mixed up in
something like this?
“Why can’t I fall for a normal man?” Eden whispered to no one in particular.
She ignored Dmitri’s frown. She didn’t believe he was like Matt, the alarm bells she’d ignored when she’d gotten with her ex-husband weren’t sounding now. But he had a whole other list of issues just waiting to destroy her life.
What did she do? She wanted honesty and she had a feeling that he would tell her everything she asked. But she also got the impression that he wouldn’t just walk away. This child she didn’t know but she loved had to come first. She needed time to digest everything and she needed space away from him.
Right now she wanted to lay down with him and let him convince her that everything would be okay and she knew that was a mistake. He’d only given her a glimpse of what his life had been like. If she was going to commit to him, she needed to be sure she could.
“Eden, I’m not that same man.”
“Did you have something to do with what happened to Matt?” she asked her eyes going wide as her brain caught up to her heart.
He paused and she tensed.
“And you’re not the same man?” she said her voice laced with scorn.
“I am who I am. I don’t hurt innocent people. I don’t crave killing, but if someone threatens the people I love, especially to the degree that man did with you, I will act. I would do the same for our child and I would do it again for you. You asked for honesty, Eden, and I’m giving it to you.”
She couldn’t hate him for Matt. After everything she’d found out about his plans for her, she couldn’t find it in her heart to pretend that she was upset he was gone. But Dmitri taking the law into his own hands only emphasized the differences between them.
“I need time to think, Dmitri. I need to figure out if I can accept this.”
“I know. I’m not going anywhere, Eden. I love you. I’ve never loved anything. I will protect you and I will put you and our child first. If you give me the chance.”
