“They asked me that?” His heart sinks.
“You don’t have to come up with any excuses. It’s fine,” she turns away from him again.
“It’s not okay because you have it all wrong,” Shadow pleads for her to listen.
She shakes her head. “I told you, you’re off the hook. You don’t have—”
“I’m deaf.”
Roe is stunned. “What?”
“I wasn’t ignoring you or Lola or Pepper or Solana, or whoever asked about you at meals yesterday. If I’m not looking, I can’t hear.”
“I don’t understand.”
“I read lips. It is the reason why I always have to face someone when they are speaking.” Shadow wants to look away, but he knows she has questions to ask. It feels like a weight lifted off his shoulders, but he’s never felt so exposed.
“Is that why you don’t join in our conversations at any of the meals?”
He chuckles. “I can hardly balance a conversation one-on-one let alone a conversation with the four of you who like to talk over each other.”
“Shadow…” She begins but he holds up his hand. He doesn’t need to hear to know she’s saying his name with sympathy and pity. Her expression says it all.
He shakes his head not wanting her to look at him differently. “It happened when I was nine. I was sneaking out of Cirvka to find a stuffed doll for my sister. She wanted one so badly that she cried herself to sleep. I snuck out and broke into a Shevka owned house where I stole one. The father woke up, found me, and beat me so bad that he ruptured both of my eardrums and I lost hearing in both of my ears.”
“I’m sorry,” she says before staring down at her lap.
He grabs her chin again pulling her face to meet his. “You have nothing to be sorry about. It’s not like it’s your fault.”
“If I had known then maybe—”
“But you didn’t,” he shakes his head. “You didn’t and it was because I didn’t want to say anything. I’ve never told anyone.”
“No one else knows?”
“Except Blade and Knot.”
“Not even Lola?”
“No and I want to keep it that way. Promise you won’t say anything.”
“But Shadow, it’s nothing to be ashamed of.”
“It’s a weakness,” he growls. “I’ve done perfectly fine on my own without anyone knowing.”
Roe nods. “Okay. Fine. I won’t tell anyone.”
“Thank you,” he exhales. “Now come on,” he stands and holds out his hand for her. “We’re going to miss breakfast.”
She smiles taking his hand in hers.
Their friends look at them with large grins. Lola wiggles her eyebrows as she looks pointedly at them. Shadow was ready to scold them and tell them they had it wrong before noticing that he and Roe are still holding hands. Red-faced, Shadow quickly lets go of Roe and turns to bring back trays for both of them. He takes his usual seat across from her and glances up from his food to see her, she catches him staring and she smiles. He can’t help but smile back.
He misses what Lola said but he looks up to see Roe discreetly repeating the question she prompted. “Yes, Shadow, what did we talk about?”
“None of your business, Lola.”
“I caught that smile. You don’t smile, Shadow.”
“I do, too. I’ve smiled before,” Shadow argues.
Lola rolls her eyes and continues to taunt them as if the conversation they had in her tent was one that was less talking and more rolling under the sheets together. He shakes his head at Lola and continues to look down at his food ignoring them. Maybe Lola was right about him smiling, his cheeks are starting to hurt from it. He is in a particularly good mood right now for someone who let himself be completely vulnerable to someone he met just these past few weeks.
* * *
Shadow stands in the doorway of his father’s office. His father is sitting behind his desk with his arms crossed against his tailored pinstripe black suit. The shadow from the brim of the top hat he’s wearing covers his dark eyes. The hard expression sends chills down Shadows spine. The warmth his father had many years ago is completely gone. The male before him is a callous stranger.
“It’s done. Madame Tallulah told her everything,” Shadow reports.
“Good,” his father picks up the dagger on his desk and begins polishing it with his handkerchief. “I want you to bring her to me.”
“But—”
“You are to bring her to me. Am I understood?” He lifts his head high enough for Shadow to see the rage seething in his eyes. “You better be focused on our goal. Don’t make me activate the electricity in your collar and bound you to the camp like the rest of them.”
“Yessir.” Shadow is dismissed from his father’s office.
Blade and Knot are eavesdropping near the door. Shadow gives a reprimanding look pushing past them to try and forget today in the comfort of his own room. The two follow him into his room shutting the door ready to bombard him with questions that are no doubt going to be about Roe. Blade sits on the only stool in my room and kicks his feet up on a pile of books.
“What do you two idiots want?” Shadow knocks Blade’s feet down. A few books fall to the ground and he growls picking them up including his favorite.
“We heard Roe got her powers,” Blade comments.
“More like saw,” Knot snorts.
“Yeah, she seemed pissed at you,” Blade bellows thinking the situation is funny.
“What was she mad about? The fact that you left her? I told her that—”
“Told her what? Why were you talking to her?” Shadow raises his voice and stands up from his bed. “I told you not to go anywhere near her!”
“Calm down lover boy, if you must know she came to me,” Knot boasts.
Shadow clenches his fists, ready to punch him. He warned the two of them not to go near her or talk to her even if she came to them. They never listen to him. Shadow doesn’t think they can keep their mouths shut about anything.
“She came to me in the dead of night knocking on my window. I had a visitor, too.”
“Prince Arlo is still seeing you?” Blade divulges.
“Yes,” he snaps.
“How did she know which bedroom was yours?” Shadow prompts.
“She didn’t,” Knot chuckles. “It was a lucky guess. You should really tell your lover that your father’s room is right next door.”
Shadow curses silently to himself. How could Roe be so stupid as to come to restricted territory where his father easily could’ve...
He doesn’t even want to think about it.
He’d have to have a talk with her later about sneaking around and what type of consequence is entailed if she got caught. He runs his hands through his hair and exhales. If anything is going to kill him, it will be stress. That female is going to be the end of him.
“What’s next?” Blade asks. “Is it almost time?”
“No. My father wants to meet with Roe. Earn her trust.” This is the last thing he wants to talk about. He told her his best-kept secret because he wants her to trust him and still he is deceiving her time and time again. Their friendship—that he’s pretty sure took a massive step forward—is soon going to crumble. Same goes for his friendship with Lola, Pepper, and Solana. If they knew what he’s keeping from them, they will hate him forever. He realizes, he’s no better than his father.
“Good,” Blade nods. “We’re one step closer to the end.”
Shadow starts to have this sickening feeling in his stomach. He feels nauseous with guilt and regret.
Knot hardens his eyes staring at him with frustration and lack of understanding. “It is too late to back out.”
“You don’t think I know that?” Shadow says through gritted teeth. “Who said anything about backing out?”
“I saw that look. You like her,” Knot crosses his arms.
“I do not. I know my role in this operation and that is exactly what I’m doing. My part.”
“Whatever you say,” Knot rolls his eyes. “Don’t screw this up for us.”
* * *
Concentrate. Rowan tries to focus with every fiber of her being.
“You can do it. Aim for the middle and hit the target,” Madame Tallulah encourages.
The bullseye’s target is three feet away from her. Three feet. It should be easy but her flame just barely misses the middle dot. Just barely. In her mind that’s good enough, but Madame Tallulah argues that if she were aiming for something specific like someone’s eyes, she would hit the cheek. If she can’t hit the target at three feet, then there is no way she would be able to hit her target from across the room during a fight.
She has never wished she was like her brothers. She was never envious of them or their studies. Except now. She wishes she was taught sword fighting and hand-to-hand combat. That would come in handy right now, not the bias history lessons that were nothing but lies.
“You’re too distracted. Clear your mind.”
Telling Rowan to clear her mind is like telling Rowan to breathe underwater. Although questions of her past have been answered, she knows her power, her parents, her purpose, it still hasn’t subsided thoughts of what the future entails for her. How is she supposed to save an entire land from endless fighting when she can’t hit a simple target?
After hours of concentration and hours of getting nowhere, she aims and nothing. Her fire completely snuffs out. Madame Tallulah had warned her about a burnout but she didn’t think she was close. The old sorceress told her every magical being, Shevka and Dakra, are born with a cap on their magic. A limit so to speak. The more magic used in a single time period the less powerful it will become. Replenishing her energy is the fastest way to get her magic back to its peak.
Rowan reluctantly takes a break. Getting food and sleep is her top priority. She’s been solely focused on her studies and learning how to command her powers, that lately she hasn’t had much time for anything. Including her friends.
Pepper, Solana, and Lottie are hanging out at Lola’s booth talking and laughing. Even though she has excused herself to practice her magic, she can’t help but feel the sting of being excluded.
“How’s it going?” Lola cheers, happy to see her. She pulls her into the booth and grabs a stool for her to sit on.
“You look pale,” Pepper frowns. “You’re pushing yourself too hard.”
“I’m pushing myself just enough,” she argues. “If I’m going to be some sort of peace bringer I have to be the best don’t I?”
“I think you’re putting too much pressure on yourself,” Pepper softly speaks.
“Wouldn’t you?” Rowan groans. “There is too much pressure! How am I supposed to save an entire kingdom? I can’t be the Lost Heir—I just can’t. I escaped the castle and chose to stay here so I could be free! Now I’m supposed to go back and fight my father? Fight whoever?”
“You’re doing this so the low bloods can be free. Just as you have always wanted to be.”
Pepper is right. “They got the wrong female,” Rowan shakes her head with defeat. “I can’t stop an army of Shevka warriors. I can’t stop whatever mysterious thing Madame Tallulah won’t tell me about that is supposedly waiting for me. I can’t hit a target with my powers and I couldn’t beat up Knot in the ring. How can I be a savior?”
“We told you,” Lola places her hand on Rowan’s shoulder. “We will stand by you and help you fight. Don’t you remember what Madame Tallulah said? You have the advantage of friendship on your side.”
“You think you’re doing this alone, but you aren’t,” Solana puts her hand on Rowan’s opposite shoulder.
Rowan fights back the tears burning in her eyes. “My entire life has been a lie. I was raised to be someone I’m not. Now I’m this Dakra with powers I never knew I had and a destined fate that’s supposed to change everything in such a short span of time. I don’t know who I’m supposed to be. How can I go from being a princess to being the Lost Heir?”
It’s Lottie who says, “Where you come from is nowhere near as important as the people who help you get to where you’re supposed to be.”
Rowan feels breathless as Lottie wraps her arms around her waist and hugs her.
“Your past might not have been anything like ours, but your existence is because of it. You lost just as much as we did. You are fated to change the lands and we all will gladly give our lives to help you bring peace amongst the high and low bloods,” Pepper makes eye contact with Rowan and puts her hand over her heart. It is an unspoken promise that no matter what, she will stay by her side and do whatever she can to help Rowan on her quest.
As Rowan sits on the stool engulfed by four females that have changed her life drastically, she realizes working alone is the reason for her failure. “I want you all to come with me when I practice at Madame Tallulah’s. Since we’re in this together...we can work together.” She realizes what’s been missing from her lessons is encouragement and purpose.
Every time she looks at her friends, she sees a half hybrid who lost her mate. An alchemist who didn’t want to live in this world anymore. A sorceress who lost a family and an unborn child. A small Shevka girl who was hurt by people who were supposed to love her the most. And Shadow; who lost his hearing to make sure his little sister stayed happy and innocent during miserable and trying times.
Everything they’ve gone through are reasons to fight back and make sure no one else in the kingdom goes through the same torment they have endured.
Despite the lack of hope, pessimism, and the fear she has about her destiny—she will fight. Rowan is not scared of death, but she is scared of failure. Failure comes with losing what is dear to her, like her friends. Failure comes with living in a world where low bloods can’t act on their true passions due to Shevka oppression.
There is no room for failure. All Rowan can do is her best and if she falls, well then she is bringing all of them down with her. But with her friends by her side, she feels like it will be alright.
Dinner is starting and Rowan is starved. So starved that she contemplates grabbing two trays for herself. They talk and laugh over their meals and for a moment, there is not a single care on her mind. Being with them now is all the peace she could have asked for.
Lola’s eyes dart over Rowan’s shoulder and she turns around to see Shadow standing near the tent’s entrance talking to Blade and Knot. Shadow’s brows are pressed together and she can’t help but feel compelled to walk over and see what is going on. She turns back around refocusing on her tray of food.
“He’s staring at you,” Lola whispers.
“Who? Shadow?” She asks and both Lola and Lottie nod.
Rowan stands weaving through tables to get to Shadow. Knot and Blade are talking to him hurriedly and shut their mouths quickly when she stands in front of them.
“Good evening, Roe,” Knot gives her a charming smile.
“Good evening,” she says politely to all three of them. “Is there something you want?”
“Nope, nothing,” Blade grins and elbows Shadow in the ribs.
Shadow growls, clenching and unclenching his fists at his side. His jaw ticks in irritation and it isn’t hard for her to guess the source of it. “I didn’t want to keep you from your dinner.”
“Well, I’m here now,” her heart skips a beat.
“There’s someone who wants to meet you.”
“Meet me?”
“Yes, but first we need to talk,” Shadow remarks in a low voice. “Alone.”
Knot and Blade stand there stubbornly, their arms crossed over their chests. Shadow grabs her wrist pulling her away from the dining hall. Her stomach protests to stay and eat but she is too curious about who wants to meet her.
He brings her back to her tent. He doesn’t attempt to sit, but stands gripping her shoulders so they are directly in front of each other. “There’s someone I know, he was close with King Bren. He knew that the queen was pregnant with you. He’s been searc
hing for you all this time.”
“Me?” She says with disbelief.
“Yes, he can help you. Your powers are strong and he can help teach you to wield it. He worked with your father and understood his powers quite well.”
“Help me how?” Skepticism rings in her tone.
“Help you carry out your fate,” his fingers dig into her shoulders.
Rowan blinks, her mouth open in shock. “How...how do you know about that?”
“Madame Tallulah has been with Cirvka since day one. So has the male I’m bringing you to. Madame Tallulah has prophesied to him of your return—that’s why he’s been waiting all this time. He’s been waiting for you, Rowan.”
Her eyes widened in surprise at hearing her name. “How do you know my name? Who is this male?” She asks warily.
“I know a lot of things,” he shakes his head dismissing her. “They call him The Overseer.”
* * *
CHAPTER ELEVEN
The Overseer is the mastermind behind the operation that is Cirvka. No one has seen him and everyone has questioned whether his existence is actually real.
Rowan spends the night wondering what he’ll look like. What he’ll be like. The next morning creeps up slowly giving her little to no sleep. They all grab breakfast together but she realizes she isn’t hungry at all. She’s too anxious for her meeting with The Overseer.
At breakfast, Shadow urges her that she will need her strength, but how can she eat with a nervous stomach? Her nerves are getting the better of her, her legs shake anxiously under the table. They all note that she seems distracted and they offer to go with her but Shadow says he wants to meet with only Rowan—no one else.
When a new conversation strikes up, Shadow leans in close to Rowan and whispers, “I’ll be right beside you through it all.”
After forcing herself to finish most of what was on her tray, Shadow escorts Rowan out of the tent. Together they head to the building in the restricted section of Cirvka. The same place Shadow took her to get her collar. Inside the building and down the dark corridor, he grabs the doorknob of the first door on the left. He pauses for a heartbeat until turning the handle and holding open the door for her. She slowly walks through the threshold, she makes no conscious decision to move, and that is when she realizes Shadow has his arm on her back and is guiding her further into the room.
Fight for the Crown Page 13
