by Hamel, B. B.
I’ll still stick around in Philly for a while longer. Maybe a few more months, maybe as long as a year. I want to make sure that it’s in good hands once I finally leave.
And I want to make sure this Darin thing is totally resolved.
No news is good news, and I buzz through the hours. I don’t get to spend as much time with Val as I like, but we sneak off into my office sometimes. I kiss her, whisper in her ear, slip my hand between her legs. We don’t push it though, because we both remember Aimee nearly catching us last time.
* * *
On Monday, I come into the office, and Val’s already there. She comes to my door and knocks before coming inside and closing it behind her.
“What’s up?” I ask. “You’re in early.”
“Bad news.”
“What happened?”
“Lost that account some money.”
I frown a little. “How much?”
“Not too much. About half a million.”
I whistle. “They won’t like that.”
“No, they won’t.” She gives me a flat look. “I wonder how they’ll react.”
I stare at her for a long moment. “Valerie, did you lose that money on purpose?”
“I would never do that. It’s unethical.”
I sigh and rub my eyes. “Valerie.”
“I didn’t do it on purpose,” she says slowly. “But I also wasn’t very careful.”
“You need to tell me before you do something like that.”
“I’ve been getting pressure.”
“What kind of pressure?”
She stares at me for a beat. “You know.”
“Tell your boss to go fuck himself.” I stand up. “We can’t mess with these guys.”
“We need to do something. Otherwise, they’re just going to sit around and let the money grow. We need more information.”
I close my eyes for a second then come around the desk. I sit on the corner and watch her. “I’ll admit, it’s not a bad plan. And if they’re mobsters, I don’t feel bad about losing them some money.”
She grins. “If they’re not?”
“If they’re not, I’ll replace what we lost personally.”
She blinks rapidly. “You… can do that?”
“Yes,” I say. “I can.”
“Wait… how? I mean, I know you guys do pretty good here, but—”
“My family,” he says. “It’s wealthy. Remember?”
“Ah,” she answers. “I see.”
“It’s that kind of wealth. Half a million isn’t nothing, but it’s not going to bother us much, if at all.”
“Okay then. So we tell them and see what shakes loose.”
“Come here.”
She walks over, looking a little hesitant. My blinds are still open and anyone could look in here and see us.
“You need to talk to me first,” I say. “I’m not going to play ball if you keep things from me.”
“I know. I shouldn’t have done that.”
I tighten my fingers on the desk. “But more than that. I can’t protect you if you do things without discussing them with me first.”
“I was afraid you’d tell me no.”
I laugh a little. “I probably would have.”
“Well—”
“But we could’ve talked about it,” I say over her. “We could’ve had a discussion. Maybe you could’ve convinced me. Do you really think I wouldn’t listen?”
“No,” she admits. “I don’t think that.”
“Good. Then please, next time, talk to me.”
“I will.”
I want to get up and go to her, but I hold back. I’ve been craving her body so badly lately. We’ve only been together for short moments since I finally felt her deep inside, since she looked up at me with my cock between her pretty lips and swallowed every drop.
“I’ll call Darin and see how this goes.”
“Keep me updated?”
I nod. “Of course. I’ll keep you in the loop.”
She bites her lip but nods. I like that she’s not apologizing. But she clearly knows she fucked up.
She leaves my office and I go around the desk. I sit down and hesitate for a moment. I have to think about how I’ll play this. We’ve only had the account for a few weeks, so losing half a million won’t look great. Darin will be pissed. He’d be pissed no matter what account, but this one is obviously special.
But I know I have to tell him right away. Hiding it will only make it worse.
“Yo, brother,” he says, answering on the second ring.
“Hey, man,” I say. “Look, is this a good time?”
“Sure, just got back to my hotel. Signed a new client. Some asshole that invented those, like, weird frozen ice cream balls?”
“Dip’n’Dots,” I say. “Fun and delicious.”
“Right, well, he’s rich. So he wants to be richer.”
“That’s how it goes.”
“What’s up?”
I hesitate for a second. I glance out my window and can see Val sitting at her desk, swaying back and forth slightly as she types up an email or something.
“Look, it’s about that special little account you gave me.”
He sighs. “I thought we were done with this.”
“It’s not that. I just… shit, man. We lost them some money.”
He’s quiet for a long moment. “You did what?”
“Lost them money. You wanted us to be aggressive about how much we make for them and we made some bad bets.”
“It’s been, like, a fucking month,” he says.
“Six weeks,” I correct. “I believe.”
“Six weeks is like ten seconds in investing time. What the fuck happened?”
“We bet on a fledgling company and it was a bad bet.” I drum my fingers on the top of my desk. “That’s all it is.”
“Who is ‘we’? You mean, Valerie did?”
“No,” I say, voice tight. “I did. I was involved in making the portfolio.”
“So then you both fucked up.”
“If you want to put it that way.”
“How much did you lose?”
“Half a million.”
He’s quiet for a long moment. I can practically feel his tension through the phone line. I shift in my chair and lean forward, hunching my shoulders slightly. I wish I could do this in person and see the look in his face.
He’d be mad if I lost that much for any client. He’d have to do damage control and Darin hates doing damage control. He wants to live in a world where we make no mistakes and everyone we know makes a lot of money. Unfortunately, in the investing business, even if you’re really, really good, some people get unlucky.
But I wish I could see if it’s fear in his eyes or annoyance.
“That’s a lot,” he says. “Why the fuck did you gamble with that much?”
“It would’ve paid out ten times that,” I say. It’s an exaggeration, but not by much.
“Still. What the fuck, Jacob?”
“Look, tell them what happened. Tell them I’ll recoup their losses. Personally, if it comes to that.”
“It won’t matter.” He sounds tense, angry. Maybe afraid, but I’m not sure. “Look, these guys…”
“They’re what?” I ask. “These guys, what?”
“They’re not the kind of guys that take this shit lightly. They’ll see it like we stole from them.”
“That’s not how investing works. We didn’t make any guarantees.”
“We also didn’t tell them we were going to make some risky bet with half a million dollars.”
“Come on,” I say, starting to feel my anger rise. “You’re really going to act like it’s the end of the world?”
“It’s not a small thing.” He lets out a breath. “Look, I gotta go call them right now. We can salvage this. We’ll figure it out, right? You can make that money back.”
“I can cover it. I can recoup them myself if I have to.”
&nbs
p; “Right, yeah.” He laughs. It sounds nervous, tense. It sounds fucking afraid. “You’re rich, right?”
“I’m rich,” I confirm.
“I forget that sometimes. You know, since some of us are out here working for a living.”
I let that comment slide. “Call them. Call me back.”
“Yeah, sure.” He hangs up the phone.
I stand and call Valerie in to my office and close the door behind her. “Just told Darin,” I say.
She sits down and I go back behind my desk. “How’d it go?”
“He sounded afraid.”
She frowns at me. “I’m sorry, Jacob.”
“You don’t have to be sorry. It’s not… it doesn’t prove anything.”
“I know. You’re right.” She cocks her head slightly and wants to say something more, but stops herself.
“Look, I just wanted you to know, okay? He’s going to call back soon. Maybe you should be here for it.”
“That’s a good idea.” She leans toward me. “Are you okay?”
“I’m okay.”
“I’m sorry, Jacob. I know I shouldn’t have done that.”
“I know. You shouldn’t have.” I shake my head slowly. “If these guys are mafia, this might get dangerous.”
She frowns at me. “What do you mean?”
“They kill people for this sort of stuff.”
She laughs like I’m joking then slowly stops. “You’re serious? This is investing. This… this stuff happens.”
I stare at her. “Val, these guys are dangerous. Are you joking with me right now? You don’t realize it can get violent?”
“I just… I didn’t…” She trails off and looks horrified.
“Oh, god,” I say softly. “You didn’t think about it. You were just playing with numbers.”
“I thought it wouldn’t matter. Since they have so much.”
I shake my head. “Fuck, Val.”
“I should’ve talked to you first.”
“Yeah, you should have.” I lean back in my chair. “But you didn’t, so now we wait.”
She gets up and paces. I want to get up and go to her, hold her, hug her, try to comfort her, but I can’t. Not with the office just outside my windows. And besides, I’m a little pissed at her for being so fucking careless.
I know she wants to move this case along and gets things worked out, but losing the mob some money like that was reckless. She clearly didn’t think about what it would mean if these guys really were organized crime.
The phone starts to ring. I stare at the name. “It’s him,” I say.
She comes over and sits down, even more pale than usual. “Go ahead. Answer.”
I pick it up and put it on speaker. “Hey, man,” I say.
“They’re pissed.”
I wince a little. “Yeah?”
“They’re really, really pissed. I talked to Carmine and he wants to talk to you.”
“Okay. Put him through.”
“No, in person.”
I stare at Valerie. She shakes her head, eyes wide.
“He can come to the office if he wants.”
“No, dude, listen to me. He wants you to meet him at the place you guys first met. Some coffee shop? You gotta go, just go and explain to him that investments come with risk, and you can recoup all his losses. Okay?”
“Fuck that,” I say. “No way.”
“Look, please. You have to go.” He sounds scared now, really scared, and he’s not trying to hide it.
“Who are these guys, Darin?” I ask him.
He’s quiet for a second. “Just go, okay? Make things right. Write him a check on the spot. He’ll like that.”
“I’m not going. He can come into this office if he wants. I’m not going to risk my life.”
“They’re not going to hurt you,” he says and tries to laugh, but it’s so transparently not true. He slowly goes quiet. “Look, you just have to go.”
“I’m not going and stop asking. If they want to talk, they can call Aimee and set up an appointment.”
“Oh, god,” he groans. “Don’t be like that.”
“You got us into this,” I snap at him. “You brought them into our lives. You chose this.”
“Jacob—”
“You did this, Darin. I gave you every fucking out.” I forget about Valerie, about her bosses, about the feds. Suddenly, it’s just about me and him. “You insisted on bringing them in. Are they the reason you wanted to open this office in the first place?”
“No,” he says. “They’re not.”
“I don’t believe a word you’re saying anymore.”
“You lost the money.” He’s defensive now, harder. “You’re the one that made this mess. You clean it up.”
“Fuck you, Darin.”
“Right back at you, brother.”
I hang up the phone. I close my eyes and take a deep breath before slowly letting it out.
“That went well,” Valerie says.
I glare at her. “Thanks.”
“Look, he’s upset. He’s angry.”
“I’m upset and angry.”
“I know. You both need to cool off. The guys will come in and we’ll talk to them and make it all right. Okay?”
“Yeah, sure.”
“Hey, maybe they’re not mob at all, you know? Just some pissed-off trash men.”
I give her a flat stare. “You really think so?”
Her smile slowly disappears. “I don’t know.”
“Yeah, neither do I.”
We linger there for a moment. I lean back in my chair and rub my eyes. This has gotten too far out of control and I don’t fucking like that.
“Look, get back to work. We’ll deal with Carmine and them when it happens, okay?”
“Okay.” She hesitates. “I really didn’t mean for this to happen. I really thought… I thought it would flush them out somehow.”
I nod a little. “I know you did. It’s okay.”
“It’s really not.”
I smile. “It will be. Go ahead, go to work. I’ll handle it.”
“Thanks, Jacob.” She stands. “I’m really glad I told you the truth.”
“I am too. Even if it’s a hard fucking truth.”
She heads back to her desk and I stare at her as she goes.
She’s so fucking beautiful and smart. But she went behind my back and did this. I don’t know what I’m going to do about that. I demanded her devotion and I was ready to give mine right back, but this… this makes things harder. I don’t know where she really stands or what she really wants. I’m afraid it’s always been about using me to get an easy case.
Well, it doesn’t change the fact we have some pissed-off gangsters, and it’s up to me to make things right.
17
Val
I go home that night dreaming of mobsters breaking into my apartment and shooting me with machine guns.
That doesn’t happen, of course. I almost want it to though.
I was stupid. I knew what I was doing. It wasn’t entirely my idea… but I knew I was provoking a reacting from dangerous men. But the idea that the reaction might be violent never occurred to me.
And not telling Jacob… that’s even worse. He’s trying so hard to help me with this investigation, going above and beyond, and I need to show him that same level of trust. He wants to call it devotion, and so I can be devoted.
I made a mistake. But I won’t make that mistake again. I need Jacob more than just for this thing with the SEC.
As I step into my apartment, my phone starts ringing. I answer right away.
“How are things?” Mr. Gauge sounds almost chipper today.
“Things are okay,” I say. “Things are moving.”
“What have you found?”
“I did what you suggested,” I say. “I bet that money on the stock you suggested.”
“And?”
“And I lost them half a million.”
He chuckles. “Poor men.”
“Sir, are you sure they’re gangsters?”
“I’m very sure.”
“Because what we just did…”
“Was insider trading? Could land us in jail?”
“The latter, at least.”
“Well, don’t worry. I won’t investigate us if you don’t.” He chuckles again. “They’re going to be angry, and when men like them are angry, they do stupid things. We’re watching them closely.”
“What happens next?”
“I’m not sure,” he admits. “But once we have proof of what they are, we’ll know Darin’s truly guilty. Then we get warrants.”
“Warrants for what?”
“To search FLFM.”
“Wait, you never said we were going after FLFM, just Darin himself.”
He’s quiet for a moment. “Listen, Valerie. If Darin is guilty, FLFM is guilty. Which means Jacob Lofthouse is guilty as well. Maybe he wasn’t knowingly in on this, but he’ll have been a part of it.”
I stare at my living room wall in shock and horror.
“Sir—”
“Keep an eye on those men,” Mr. Gauge says. “And report back in soon. I’m counting on you, Valerie.” He hangs up.
I slowly let the phone drop down to the floor.
We’re going after FLFM. We’re going after Jacob.
That wasn’t what they told me. From the start, it was about Darin and Darin alone. FLFM and Jacob weren’t a part of any of the briefings I received.
And now they’re changing the rules. Something happened, and now FLFM is on the chopping block.
I can’t let that happen. I won’t let it happen. Not after Jacob did so much for me. Not after he made me feel things… made me want him.
I shower, eat dinner, go to bed that night thinking about him, trying to figure out what I can do. I don’t want to just call him out of the blue and tell him what’s happening. I’m afraid it’ll only scare him away and make him angry. I don’t want to lose him on top of everything.
In the morning, I get to the office early. Jacob doesn’t show up at his usual time, which makes me uneasy. I try calling him, but he doesn’t answer. I email and text, but get nothing
Eventually, around noon, he shows up. He looks tired. I get up and take a step toward him but he just waves for me to follow.
