Her panic subsided a little. She still didn’t know Jesse well enough to gauge whether or not he was lying. But he seemed sincere.
“Would that be the worst thing in the world if these people found out we slept together?”
She rested her elbow on the armrest beside her, pinching the bridge of her nose. “Can we just table this discussion, please?”
He put his attention back on his book. “No problem.”
God she was messing this up, so epically. She put her hand on his arm. “I’m not embarrassed of you. I’m embarrassed of myself and my actions, okay?”
He squinted at her. “Because you slept with me?”
She closed her eyes, trying to think of a way to explain this to him. “Because I’m not myself when I’m around you. I become someone I don’t recognize. I’m typically very in control with the men I date…not that you could call what’s been happening between us dating, but regardless, I’m not in control around you. I become this other version of myself that quite frankly scares me.”
“You don’t seem very scary to me.”
She smiled, looking down at her lap. “No, I imagine I do not.”
“You seem intimidating, but not scary.”
She jerked her head up. “Intimidating? You can’t be serious.”
He shifted his body to face her. “Are you fucking kidding me?” he said, keeping his volume in check. “You’re this sophisticated, mature, beautiful woman who runs her own business and does long-term volunteer work and feels guilty because you don’t do more. Everyone in your orbit worships you. You should have heard those guys talking about you the other night. Do you have a clue what people think about you? They look up to you. They want to be you and they want to be with you. I’m just trying to figure out how the hell I broke down your wall, even if it was just for one night.”
A monsoon of emotions swirled inside her mind, unworthiness and humility rising to the top. She looked away from him, putting her attention onto the magazine in her lap that she couldn’t read if she tried. She rested her cheek in her hand and let her mass of hair fall down the right side of her face so she couldn’t see him next to her. But she could feel him there. Jesus, how she could feel his presence.
10
Jesse and Cassidy stood in separate lines for check in, both flipping through their phones, but Jesse couldn’t help glances in her direction. He’d fucked up again, saying way too much. He couldn’t help it. He had no idea how to behave around this woman. She didn’t operate like any other girl he’d been with before. Whatever game plan he thought he’d brought this weekend needed to be reconfigured, because at this rate, he’d be leaving there not having gotten to know her any better than he did before he’d arrived.
They both moved up to the counter at roughly the same time, giving their information.
“O’Neil party?” the girl behind the counter said to Jesse with a lift of her eyebrow and a grin.
“Yep,” he said, glancing at Cassidy.
“Just you in the room?” the girl asked.
“Uh, yeah. Just me.”
She smiled with a nod, brushing a lock of hair behind her ear. Jesse knew this to be the international mating sign for women. Everything about this girl shouted that she was interested. This is where he’d make a suggestive joke and then gauge her reaction. If that went well, he’d ask her what there was to do around there. Depending on that reaction, he’d ask if she wanted to do it with him. Then they’d be off. But the problem was, he couldn’t quit glancing over at Cassidy.
She slid a key card to him. “Here’s your key. I’m right here till three if you have any questions.”
He took the card from her. “I’ll keep that in mind.”
She smiled again, and he stepped away and headed toward the elevator, shouldering his bag. Cassidy came his way, dragging a small suitcase on rollers. The two of them stood by the elevators in silence, Jesse’s heartbeat pounding harder than normal. Just having her in his vicinity did that to him.
The elevator doors opened and the two of them got on. Part of him hoped someone else would join them, and the other part wished he could be alone with her from now until the end of the weekend. She hit the button for floor four, and he smiled. She met his gaze. “What floor do you need?”
He nodded at the button. “Same as you.”
She glanced down at her phone, resting against the elevator wall. He wished he could see her face, but her hair was always covering it.
Both of their phones dinged at the same time, and she read the text aloud. “We’re meeting down in the lobby in a half hour for lunch by the pool.”
“Sounds like a plan,” he said.
The elevator stopped and he motioned for her to get off first, and then he followed her out. He stopped at his room. “See you in a bit.”
She checked something in her hand and closed her eyes, but stayed right beside him. She cut her gaze at him and pointed at the door next to his. “This is me.”
He had done something right after all. “Hope you don’t snore too loud.” He pushed open his door and grinned as he spotted a connecting door that led to her room.
* * *
When Jesse got down to the pool, Cassidy was sitting at a table with a handful of people he hadn’t met yet—a black couple and a guy he’d seen Cassidy sitting with the night of her welcome back party at his bar a few weeks ago. But it was pretty clear she wasn’t romantically interested in him. He seemed like he was probably gay. Jesse couldn’t be sure, because straight men his age could be ambiguous. But either way, Cassidy didn’t seem interested in more than friendship.
Dane waved him over to his table with Marigold, Ashe, and Ethan. A fifth chair was positioned awkwardly between Dane and Ethan. They’d likely pulled it over for him. Jesse hated that Dane felt like he needed to babysit him this weekend, but he was glad to be included, especially since he didn’t really know any of these people.
“We got a few apps for the table,” Dane said. “You know Ashe, right?”
Jesse shook the guy’s hand. He had a subtle glam rock vibe to him. Jesse had never gone the guy route, but he could see why Ethan was into him. “We may have met a few weeks ago when you all were at the bar for Cassidy’s welcome home party.”
“Yes, we definitely met then,” Ashe said, squeezing Jesse’s hand with a lingering gaze.
“Uh, hello. Remember me?” Ethan said, and Ashe gave him a quick kiss on the mouth.
“Speaking of Cassidy,” Ashe said, “I saw you two sitting together on the plane. Are you an item?”
Marigold and Dane exchanged a look and then got interested in their drinks.
“No, she just had the misfortune of taking the last open seat next to me.”
“I’d have been glad to take it,” Ashe said, and then turned to Ethan. “Before you, sweetie. I’m just playing with the straight boy.”
Ethan rolled his eyes lovingly as if he dealt with this all the time.
“How do you know I’m straight?” Jesse asked, playing along for fun.
Ashe lifted an eyebrow and the server appeared next to Jesse. “What can I get you to drink?”
Jesse ordered a beer, and another server came up behind them with plates of food. “Looks like I timed my entrance just right,” Jesse said.
“Happy we could be of service,” Ashe said. Jesse knew he was in for a ride with this guy this weekend. That was okay. He liked to flirt. Besides, the way he and Ethan looked at one another, Jesse knew he wasn’t any threat to this couple.
As they were finishing eating, Cassidy and her friends stood. The white guy that had been at their table headed back into the hotel, but the other three went toward the pool, pausing at Jesse’s group. The woman he hadn’t met yet rubbed Ashe’s shoulders. “You all having fun yet?”
“Always,” Marigold said. “Have you met Jesse?”
“No, I don’t think so.” She offered a long, slim hand. “I’m Desiree, and this is Tobias.”
Jesse shook hands with both of them. “N
ice to meet you.”
She pointed to the far side of the pool. “Chase has us in those two cabanas on the end. Y’all come on over when you’re done.”
“We’ll be right there,” Ashe said.
Cassidy met Jesse’s gaze with a hint of a smile. She wore a one-piece bathing suit with a pair of shorts and a sheer cover-up. She would have to shed some of those clothes eventually, and that was a sight he was looking forward to seeing.
After they finished and tried to pay—Chase, though not in sight anywhere, had already taken care of the bill—they headed over to the cabana. The lounge chairs were stacked in rows paired off in twos. Four under the shade and four out in the sun. Desiree and her man sat under the shade, and Marigold and Dane took the empty seats next to them. Ethan and Ashe set their bags on a pair of seats in the sun. “We’re going exploring,” Ethan said.
Cassidy sat in the sun in the front row. She’d shed her cover-up and shorts, leaving her long, lean body on beautiful display. Even with the one-piece she looked better than any other girl around. She indicated the only empty chair which was beside her. “Please, sit.”
“Where’s your other friend?” Jesse asked.
“Sebastian went back to his room. He’s in the middle of a work project. He’ll be down later for dinner.”
He grabbed a towel from a rack next to the cabana. “You don’t mind being seen with me?”
She gave him a look. “I’ll take my chances.”
He laid the towel out on the chair and then sat next to her. She handed him a bottle of spray sunscreen.
“No thanks. I put mine on upstairs.”
“Really? How responsible of you.”
He shrugged. “I actually put it on every morning. My grandfather died of skin cancer when I was nine. My sister was hardcore about skin protection.”
“Your sister?”
He waved her off. “It’s a long story.”
“We’ve got a lot of time.”
He considered her and then lay back. “My mom and dad divorced when I was seven. Dad moved to Minnesota for a new job, and Mom went into a depression for a while. My sister sort of raised me, in a sense. My mom was there, but even when she pulled out of the funk, she was more interested in dating and finding another husband than parenting. Rachel had always been bossy, so she loved it.” He huffed a laugh, remembering. “It didn’t go over well when I said I was moving to Florida.”
“Where are you from?”
“Louisville, Kentucky.”
“I’ve got friends in Louisville I always threaten to visit but never do. It’s just hard to get away.”
“How many people do you have working your bakery?” he asked.
“Well, right now it’s just Marigold and me, but I’ll need some more help this summer. I’m not sure how long Marigold’s gonna stick around.”
He considered her. “What made you decide to open a bakery?”
She laughed. “I ask myself that all the time. Honestly, I was living out some sort of dream from my childhood. My sister’s twelve years older than me. She used to play bakery with me. I had this toy oven that made actual cakes. They were terrible, of course, but I thought that was the coolest thing on the planet. We’d make real cupcakes and wrap them up and sell them to my stuffed animals for a nickel a piece.” She shook her head with a smile, looking like she’d escaped to another life.
“Is it all you dreamed it would be?”
She swatted a bug off her arm. “It’s fine. It’s a living. I like being my own boss. You understand that, I’m sure.”
“Sometimes. It’s nice when I want to do my thing, but even when I leave to go running or paddleboarding or whatever when it’s slow, I feel guilty for slacking off.”
“You’ve earned that right though.” She nudged him in the arm. “It’s impressive, you running your own business at such a young age.”
He frowned at her. “How old do you think I am?”
She scrunched up her face. “Um, twenty-nine.”
“Who told you?”
She smiled. “Marigold.”
“Tattletale,” he said.
She giggled. Damn that was cute. He lifted his shirt off and tossed it between his legs. She directed her attention to the pool and stretched her arm over her head, gripping the pole at the top of the chaise lounge with a grin.
“What?” he asked.
“Nothing.”
“It is a pool. Guys typically go shirtless at pools, if you haven’t taken a look around lately.”
“I didn’t say anything.”
“You were damn sure thinking something. You only smile like that when you’re thinking something.”
“Oh yeah? You think you know my smiles already?”
“Oh, I definitely know your smiles.”
She looked over at him in challenge. “What smiles?”
“You’ve got your polite smile. This is the one you give when you think something’s moderately funny. It’s accompanied by a little nod of your head as you look down. Then there’s your smile when you really think something’s funny. It stretches all the way across your face and your nose twitches, which is the cutest damned thing I’ve ever seen. Then there’s your embarrassed smile, the one you couldn’t stop if you tried. It happens without your permission, I’m guessing, and sometimes that smile lives only in your eyes ‘cause you’re trying so hard not to give anything away.”
She stared at him like she was trying to make her expression impassive, but she couldn’t control it. He pointed at her. “See, you’re giving that smile now.”
She lifted an eyebrow and then put her attention on her phone in her lap, letting her hair fall around her face again.
“And you can try to hide your expression with your hair, but I see you.” Knowing when to leave well-enough alone, he stood up from his chair and walked to the pool, doing a front flip into the water.
* * *
Jesus Christ he was good. With each word out of his mouth Cassidy realized just how much he had her nailed, and he didn’t even know her yet. How fast and how furious did women fall for this guy? How many hearts had he filled and then emptied when he moved on to the next? She tried to imagine the women he’d said these things to before, and their naïve expressions as they fell hook, line, and sinker. The only gullible face she could see though was her own.
She couldn’t help wondering what his game was. He’d already had her. He’d won. But he was still playing for some reason.
Maybe she was a novelty—something different he’d not had before. A toy that intrigued him. Maybe he’d never been with an older woman. He’d mentioned his mom. Maybe there was some issue there and he was working that out. God, please no. The last thing she wanted to do was be a part of someone working out their Oedipus complex.
Jesse rose up from the water, facing her, and ran his hands over his hair, pulling it back. He was almost too hot to digest, the muscles rippling in his tattooed forearms, his bare, empty canvas of a chest dripping with water and bursting with muscle.
She remembered a time that she could land decent looking young guys. She’d been blessed with her father’s thin frame, but with it had come his nose. She’d forgiven him for it though, his lucky genes affording her the luxury of a fast metabolism.
The ironic thing with Jesse, who was now tossing a football with some teenage kid in the pool, was that Cassidy typically relied on her appearance to attract men. And the men she dated appreciated her body. She’d always been proud of it and happy to wear tank tops and shorts that really were too short for her age. Not all the time, but to the beach or somewhere casual. But Jesse was used to girls half Cassidy’s age. What did she have to impress him with? She imagined the taut, smooth skin of a twenty-something young woman.
On cue, Hannah, Seanna’s lovely assistant, walked toward the pool from the other cabana sporting a bikini that could make a grown man cry. Hopping into the water, she held her hands in front of her face, encouraging Jesse to throw her the football, whic
h he did. The teenage boy was all too happy to let Hannah into the game.
Cassidy shifted in her chair, hating that she was doubting herself. Since when did her confidence in her appearance waver? Since she’d let herself get interested in a man half her age…that was when.
11
Poor Shayla had endured the full bachelorette treatment at the hands of Marigold with everything from a tiara veil to penis straws. Cassidy had seen way worse, and Marigold was a very tasteful woman which helped, but Marigold had ensured they spent two hours making Shayla the absolute center of attention. Shayla protested a little at first, which was expected, but after she settled in, Cassidy might have suspected a little enjoyment on Shayla’s part.
At ten o’clock sharp, Shayla shed the veil as she said she would. “Time’s up, Cinderella,” she said, putting the veil on Marigold’s head.
Marigold vogued with it for a moment, and then took it off. “Lord, don’t let Dane see me like this. I’m still trying to nab him. The last thing I need is for him to see me playing bride.”
Sebastian took the veil from her and put it on his own head. “I’m fairly sure he’s nabbed.”
“Are we going to where the guys are, or are they coming to us?” Desiree asked. She’d been anxious about leaving Tobias. He’d been around their group a handful of times, but with their on-again-off-again status, the guys of the group were a little suspicious of him. Tobias seemed like he could handle himself though.
Cassidy checked her text. “They’re at the dance club at the hotel.”
“Perfect,” Sebastian said, shedding the veil. “I’ve had all the fun I can stand for a night.”
Marigold grabbed his shoulders. “You’re such an old man sometimes, Sebastian.”
“I know, princess. But this old man needs his beauty sleep if I’m going to be fit for consumption tomorrow. Besides, we’re steering into couple-mode now and…” He held up both hands, glancing around for a nonexistent partner.
Cassidy could not for the life of her understand how some incredibly lucky man had not found his way to Sebastian by now. He was one of the most amazing creatures on earth—the whole perfect package from his appearance to his kind and generous heart. Her own heart pained her when she thought about it.
Grayton Beach Dreams Page 8
