Luc nodded, but a part of me knew that he was lying. He wouldn’t stop me, and I didn’t know if I wanted to yell at him or tell him that I loved him.
Drawing in a shallow breath, I placed my other hand on his chest like Hunter had instructed, right where I felt the Source inside myself. I closed my eyes, and a moment later, I felt Luc fold his hand over mine. Tears pricked my lids as emotion swelled so swiftly I sucked in a sharp breath. Instead of shoving the riot of feelings aside, I let them wash over me, and then I held all that love, all that acceptance close to my heart.
Hunter hadn’t been lying.
Instinct took over. I leaned in, placing my lips a hairbreadth away from his, and inhaled.
Against his chest, I felt the Source flare, and then warmth flowed through my hand and down my throat like a cascading fall of sunlight. Deep in my chest, the Source pulsed again, this time stronger, brighter, like a morning glory opening to the first rays of sun.
Luc spasmed, sending a shock of fear through me. I started to pull back.
I’m okay. Seriously. His voice whispered among my thoughts. It doesn’t hurt. It’s just … different. Continue.
Listening to his voice for any hint of pain, I found none, which was good, because I needed more. I inhaled again, and this time, the warmth poured through me, into the pulsing center of my chest, and then Luc’s energy was everywhere. My skin hummed with it, my blood sped up in response to it. The spark didn’t flicker this time. It roared to life and—
Images suddenly and without warning pieced together. I saw myself, a younger me dressed in what looked like a white sheet with an opening cut out for my head and a silver-colored belt cinched around my waist. My hair was twisted into buns on either side of my head. I was spinning, the edges of the sheet lifting to reveal white leggings underneath as I swung a plastic lightsaber. Laughter. I heard laughter, and I knew it was Luc’s as I shot toward the sound, jabbing the lightsaber as if it were a sword. The image was quickly replaced by another one of me, where I looked maybe a year or so older.
I was sitting on the floor beside a stunning man who looked as if he were made of gold and diamonds. His skin was such an astonishing shade of gold, hair like sunlight.
Paris.
Oh God, that was the Paris.
He was watching me as I shook my fist and then opened my hand. Dice fell out. All sixes.
“Yahtzee!” I shouted.
Paris grinned. “How many is that, Luc?”
A disgruntled sigh came. “Five. That’s five Yahtzees, and you’re totally helping her cheat.”
I watched myself laugh in a way I had never laughed before, tumbling over onto my side.
That image evaporated, replaced by an older version, one where I wore a silvery, shimmering dress and my hair was long, a wild tangle. Cheeks flushed with anger and hands curled into fists, I stood inside a doorway of an office. Wads of cash were stacked on a desk. Sitting on top of one of the stacks was some kind of handheld game system.
“I hate when you do that,” I said.
“Do what?” The nonchalant voice belonged to Luc. It was his, but nowhere near as deep as it was now.
“Don’t pretend like you have no idea what I’m talking about! That couple and that guy that were just here. You didn’t want them to see me. What was wrong with them? They looked—”
“It’s not the couple I’m worried about,” he replied. “It’s the other one. He never needs to know about you.”
My thoughts crowded with churning light and shadows, pushing back other images—
Enough. I had enough. I needed to stop.
But the taste of Luc was on my lips and inside me. I was surrounded in him, and I thought I could drown in him, and that would be okay. That would be more—
No.
If I drowned, Luc would surely go down with me. I had enough, more than enough.
I yanked my hand back as I lifted my head up. That was as far as I got. Somehow Luc was on his back and I was half on him, half on my side. His arms were tight around me, and underneath my chest, his heart was beating fast. His head was kicked back, eyes closed and mouth lax. My heart stopped with dread even as my entire body thrummed with power. “Luc? Are you—?”
“I’m fine.” His throat worked on a swallow. “I’m not in pain.”
“You look like you’re in pain.”
“I’m not in pain.”
My brows drew down as I started to roll over him—
“Nope.” His arm clamped my waist to his side. “Just stay right there.”
I stared at him. “Okay. I can do that.”
“Good. Great.” Luc’s jaw worked, and then his head tilted to the side, toward me. He opened his eyes, and the pupils were all white. “How do you feel? Did you get enough?”
“Did I…?” I shook my head. “I just fed off you, and you’re asking how I am?”
His brows knitted. “Why would I not?”
I stared at him, feeling tears crowd my eyes once more. “I love you,” I whispered.
Expression smoothing, a small smile appeared. “I know.”
My hand balled in the front of his shirt. “Thank you—”
“Don’t thank me for that, not for doing what I needed to do.”
His features blurred. “When am I supposed to thank you, Luc?”
“When I do something worth thanking me for.” The light receded from his pupils while I wondered what in the world he thought was worth more than what he’d just given me. “You saw something, didn’t you? When you fed?”
The question brought forth the image of me dressed in a sheet, swinging a lightsaber. I knew what I saw. It was me dressed as Princess Leia for Halloween. I knew that because Luc had told me about it.
“I saw your memories,” I whispered.
“Yeah. Should’ve warned you that could happen. When an Arum feeds, they can see memories and sometimes capture emotions. I wasn’t sure if you would, but I wanted to be prepared in case. I wanted you to see some of my good memories.”
30
Luc had needed more than an hour to recover. He’d needed the rest of the evening, but by nightfall, he’d been back to feeling like himself. Mostly. He’d fallen asleep pretty early, and I tried not to be too worried about that. Luc said he just needed to rest for the evening, and he’d be back to normal. I had to believe that.
As I’d lain beside him, no longer feeling like my stomach was trying to eat itself, an idea came to me. I’d quietly slipped out of bed and moved silently through the house. I gathered up several cans of food I didn’t think Luc or I would miss and placed them in a paper bag, along with a few bottles of water and another pack of fresh bread, but this time I added in something else. My eyesight had definitely improved, because I easily found an old notepad and pencil on the dark kitchen counter. I wrote a quick note to Nate, asking if he needed anything in particular. Dropping the pencil and a blank piece of paper in the bag, I started toward the door when I felt the presence of a Luxen. I didn’t think I was feeling Daemon, unless he was trying to get Adam to sleep and had roamed into the backyard.
Placing the bag on the counter, I cracked open the door. The scent of rain followed the wisps of cool air as I scanned the stoop and the backyard. The tingle of awareness increased—
“You sensed me, didn’t you?”
I didn’t jump at Grayson’s voice, for which I wanted to pat myself on the back. I stepped outside, closing the door behind me as Grayson appeared, having walked out from the narrow pathway that separated the house from Daemon and Kat’s.
“I did,” I admitted.
He tilted his head. “Well, that takes the fun out of sneaking around.”
My newly improved eyes could make out most of his features. He wasn’t looking at me but rather toward the bedroom. “I would say I’m sorry, but that would be a lie.”
Grayson smirked.
“Are you patrolling or something?” I asked.
“In other words, why am I here?” he countered.
I couldn’t see his eyes, but I could feel his gaze. “Pretty much.”
“I ran into Hunter.”
The muscles along my neck tensed. “He told you, didn’t he?”
“Yes.”
“Of course he did.” I sighed, folding my arms. “I bet he took great pleasure in explaining what I had to do.”
“He did.” There was a hint of a smile on his face, but it was quick.
I now knew why Grayson was here. “Luc’s okay. He’s just sleeping right now. I didn’t take too much or hurt him,” I told him, cheeks heating as I focused on the firepit. I knew I shouldn’t be embarrassed. Obviously, this was something Arum had to do, and I didn’t have a choice. Not really. “And it’s not like I wanted to do it. We argued for most of the afternoon about it, but I…”
“You had to do it,” he finished, surprising me. “There is no way Luc would’ve allowed anything else. He probably would’ve sat on you until you fed.”
I coughed out a short laugh. “Probably.” Glancing over at him, I saw that he was staring toward the bedroom once more. “I won’t hurt him,” I blurted out. Slowly, Grayson faced me. “I know I did in the woods, but when I went after Sarah, I wanted to protect him. All of you. And the idea of doing anything that could hurt him, even if I don’t have control of myself, scares the living crap out of me. I couldn’t live with myself if I did.”
Grayson said nothing, not for several moments. “I wouldn’t let you do it again. I’d probably end up dead in the process, and if not, definitely dead afterward, but I won’t let it come to that.”
What he said wasn’t a threat. At least I didn’t take it that way, so I nodded. I don’t know why, but I suddenly wondered if I’d misjudged the source of Grayson’s loyalty. I thought about what Grayson had done for Luc after he’d healed me, and how shocked he’d been when he’d learned I was Nadia. There were other instances that now appeared in a different light to me, and I thought that maybe I now knew why he seemed to dislike me.
“Why are you staring at me?” he asked.
How he knew that I was doing just that since he was still looking at the bedroom was beyond me, and I told myself not to ask the question that was rolling to the tip of my tongue, but neither my brain nor mouth listened. “Do you love him?”
Grayson looked over at me then. “You think that’s why I don’t like you?”
Well, that was a blunt response, so I gave him an answer equally matter-of-fact. “Yes.”
He dipped his chin, chuckling. My brows lifted as he slowly shook his head. “Would it bother you if I said yes?”
I mulled that over. “No. It wouldn’t.”
“Because he loves you?”
“Yes,” I answered. “And he has to know that you love him. He knows almost everything. It doesn’t bother him.”
“I’m sure he does know.” There was a pause. “But you’re wrong about one thing. I don’t hate you.”
I opened my mouth to respond, but before I could even figure out what to say, Grayson had stepped back and disappeared around the side of the house. He didn’t hate me? A strangled laugh escaped me as I turned back to the door. I saw no reason why Grayson would lie. Wasn’t like he ever worried about my feelings before. I picked up the bag and then hurried over to the firepit, thinking that Grayson had to be the most complicated person I’d ever met.
And boy, wasn’t that saying something.
* * *
The bag was gone by the following afternoon, no note left behind. I tried not to be disappointed about that and just relieved that Nate was still out there, surviving whatever way he could.
I didn’t tell Luc about my conversation with Grayson, and if he’d picked up on it at any point, he didn’t mention it.
And neither did Grayson over the next three days, while I’d become very good at using the Source to stop objects and even people. Grayson had been the test dummy for that round of training, much to his displeasure. Since he acted as if he and I never had that conversation, I decided I’d follow his lead. What he sort of admitted to didn’t bother me. Luc was, well, he was lovable when he wanted to be, and I was just sort of relieved Grayson was capable of feeling any emotion instead of distaste or hate.
But even Luc had been impressed by how good I was getting with the Source. And it wasn’t the empty, supportive kind of impressed, because I virtually froze Grayson and then later Zoe. Neither of them could break my hold on them.
It even had taken Luc quite a bit of time to snap free of my hold, and it had required me to use even more of the Source. By the time we were done, there was a tension to the set of his shoulders, and the lines around his mouth reminded me of the other time we’d worked on the Source. I’d worried it had to do with my feeding, but he assured me he was fine.
So, I was feeling pretty good about all of that, but when the classroom with wall-to-wall windows we’d commandeered that afternoon was pitched into sudden, complete darkness and the temperatures dropped to near freezing, I couldn’t suppress the shiver that spun its way down my spine. I couldn’t see anything, and based on Zoe’s soft curse, she couldn’t, either.
“Show-off,” Luc muttered from somewhere inside the classroom. He’d been sitting on the desk. Now, he could literally be anywhere.
Somehow, Luc had wrangled Hunter into working on the non-Luxen variety of my abilities, which apparently included turning day to night. Part of me thought that Hunter might’ve been secretly relieved to be doing something. There was a haunting sadness that settled on his features every so often, and I knew he was thinking of his brother then.
I lifted my hand, unable to see it. “How did you do that?”
“Ssskill,” Hunter replied, and since he was in his true form, his voice sounded like shadows and smoke. It sounded just like the voice of Sarah, and mine when we had spoken telepathically to one another. “I’m usssing the Sssource to obssscure my presssence.”
“Can I do that?” I asked.
“I don’t sssee why not.”
“Would come in handy when you need to make a quick exit,” Zoe said. “Like when you’re at a party and there’s someone annoying there.”
“Or when I’m asked to help with training,” Grayson commented.
“Or when Grayson walks into the room,” I added.
“That’s not nice,” Grayson said from somewhere in the darkness.
I grinned.
The darkness suddenly stirred in front of me, thickening. I narrowed my eyes, sensing that Hunter had moved closer to me.
“You can beat that back,” Luc advised. “That trick should only momentarily blind you. You let it go any longer than that, you’ve lost the upper hand.”
Beat it back? Hmm. Summoning the Source, I felt it rippling through my veins. White and black light surrounded my palm, and I pictured it growing until the whole room was awash in light, but I didn’t want to harm anyone. I just wanted to see.
The churning glow erupted, spitting half a dozen mini balls into space. Each one went off like a firecracker, showering the room in glittering bright light that fell onto the thick shadows, eating away at them like acid and then evaporating before they hit the floor. Within seconds, the darkness was gone and Hunter had moved closer.
“Cute,” he said, having returned to his human form. “Now that is a party trick.”
“I didn’t want to hurt anyone in here.” I paused. “Or you. I could’ve just taken you out and the shadows would’ve gone away.”
Over Hunter’s shoulder, I saw Luc’s smug smile as Grayson leaned against the desk. “That’s my girl,” Luc said.
I beamed and then refocused on Hunter. “How did you make the shadows do that?”
“Most likely the same way you’d make it brighter.” He walked over to the desk and picked up the apple he’d brought with him. “Minus the fireworks.”
I glanced at Zoe, and she raised her brows. I started to ask for more detail, but from what I’d learned, using the Source came down to what you wille
d it to do, what you wanted from it. There was no reason to overthink it.
No reason at all, came Luc’s voice.
Nodding, I lifted my hands and summoned the Source once more. This time, the balls of energy around my hands were more dark than light. I pictured them growing and expanding, and the energy pulsed, licking out from my palms and dripping into the air. Deep, intense shadows blossomed as the skin of my arms broke out with glittering black spots. The Source roared around me like a storm, rapidly seeping over the windows, blocking out the daylight. I smiled as all the light was sucked out of the room, but I could still see. Luc was sitting on the desk, staring up at the ceiling. Grayson was beside him, looking about as approachable as an angry warthog. To my left, Zoe had her hands clutched under her chin while her eyes were wide. Hunter stood in front of the desk, watching me.
All of them were in shades of gray.
“Can you see me?” I asked the Arum.
He shook his head. “No, but you can see us.”
“I can,” I answered, and Luc’s chin snapped down. “Everything is kind of gray-washed, but I can see.”
“All these shadows, as you call them, are a part of you, almost like an extension. They wouldn’t hinder you,” Hunter explained.
“Huh. That’s pretty cool.”
“It is.” He crossed his arms. “Just remember that if you can do this, other Trojans will be able to do the same thing.”
That took away a little of the coolness factor.
“How do I look gray?” Luc asked. “Still extraordinarily beautiful, I’m sure.”
Rolling my eyes, I laughed. “You look okay.”
“Lies,” he said.
Zoe’s wide-eyed gaze darted around. “I bet I look weird.”
“No—”
Unfolding her arms, she wiggled them like limp noodles as she lifted her knees, hobbling from one foot to the next like a bizarre marionette.
“Yes,” I corrected myself. “Yes, you definitely look weird right now. And creepy.”
She grinned as she emitted a high-pitched giggle.
“Do I even want to know what she’s doing?” Grayson asked.
The Brightest Night Page 37
