Hidden (The Scions Book 1)

by Gemma Weir

  I look away before he does, sitting down at my now empty desk. By the time the bell rings for the start of class, Brit isn’t back and I don’t see her for the rest of the morning. Whispers and cautious stares follow me wherever I go and by lunchtime I’m barely holding it together.

  Each breath I take threatens to push me over the edge. I’m on the verge of a meltdown, my mind swirling louder and louder every time a conversation ends when I enter a room, or a person looks away when my gaze accidentally falls on them. The confrontation with Brit this morning is all anyone is talking about, and by the time I push into the cafeteria I overhear someone discussing how we had a fight in the middle of class and the cops were called.

  I don’t want to be in here, all I want to do I run away and hide. I’m overwhelmed with fear that if I open my mouth, my every ravaged thought will explode from me in a meltdown of such epic proportions, people will still be talking about it in ten years’ time. So I clamp my lips closed and bite my teeth together so hard that I worry they might crack and I do my best to ignore everyone.

  Today, for the first time since the start of the school year, I’m grateful for my mask of haughty indifference. I’m grateful that the expression of distasteful nonchalance is so ingrained in me that I can force it into place without thought.

  For now, the act is the only armor I have and I’m clinging to it, hoping it’ll keep my head above water. The buzz of the cafeteria quiets when I take my first step inside. Lifting my eyes, I look to the table where the rest of my so-called friends are sat and I question if I’ll be welcome there.

  Zeke told Brit that no one would pick her over me, but was he right? My feet falter. I know I need to move forward, but I’m not sure if I physically can. I don’t see him appear, but I feel his strong, reassuring presence at my shoulder. Zeke. My baby brother who is so much stronger, so much better at life than me. In this moment I’m more grateful than ever for him.

  Emmy stops at my other side, her fingers entwining with mine. Her quiet, reserved nature might make people think she’s weak, but she’s not; she has an inner strength that would rival even the biggest of guys.

  Dill and Leo stand on either side of the group and Griffin quickly follows. Right now, this is a show of force. We stand united, together with our middle fingers metaphorically in the air to anyone who dares to question us.

  Buoyed, I roll back my shoulders, glancing from one side to the other, catching the eye of each of my family in turn and then as one we move. Instead of heading for our usual table, we cross the room until we reach an empty table in the far corner. One by one we sit and the room remains silent as the onlooking kids scent the air to see if war is brewing.

  Zeke’s hand reaches for my arm beneath the table and he squeezes me lightly. “Eat,” he orders quietly.

  With a barely visible nod, I pull my lunch from my purse and lay the pasta salad on the table. Then with more bravado than I ever realized I had; I begin to eat. The food tastes like sawdust, each mouthful threatening to reappear as my fingers shake and my stomach roils. I force myself not to look at the tables full of kids who are all staring at us. Somehow, we’ve become a sideshow, an amusement that will either entertain or terrify; and the hordes of staring, pointing onlookers are all waiting on tenterhooks to find out which it is.

  Griffin says something and I lift my head, aware that the others are talking and I haven’t heard a word. My eyes watch the cafeteria door open and then he’s there, his dark hair and features making him look like a fallen angel stranded on earth for his sins.

  His eyes scan the tables and when he finds our usual one half-empty, I watch as he moves from table to table searching us out. When he finds us, a smile twitches at the corner of his mouth and he moves. Decisive steps bring him straight to us and he lowers himself into the seat at the head of the table.

  Somehow his assertive move to cross the divide between us and our now possibly former group of friends shocks the others into action. As one, all but four people stand from our regular table and move as a group toward us.

  When they reach us, all of their eyes turn to me and then Zeke as though seeking our permission to sit. I refuse to meet their eyes, pretending to be dismissive, but really not wanting anyone to look too closely at my mask that’s starting to crack. Zeke must give his assent because the group make their way to the other end of the table and sit down. As if a crisis has been averted, the silent lunchroom bursts into noise again. But I can still feel the eyes on me and the barely disguised whispers.

  Using my fork, I push the pasta around in my bowl, my hands shaking so hard my knuckles are white from my death grip on my silverware. Counting to sixty, ten times, I excuse myself and walk as confidently as I can to the restroom, trying not to draw any more attention to myself. Once I lock the stall door behind me, I lower the toilet seat and sink down onto it, gasping as huge silent sobs consume my body.

  Rocking back and forth, I lift my knees to my chest and wrap my arms around them, physically holding myself together as my mind falls apart. I bury my face against my knees, refusing to let the sounds of my agony be heard.

  Brit, the girl I’ve been friends with for years, the person who’s been a constant in my life all through middle school and high school called me a whore today. She accused me of offering myself to boys to stop them from dating her. It’s like she doesn’t know me at all. But then maybe she doesn’t. She has no idea that I hate the role I play; she doesn’t know how much the parties we attend most weekends stress me out to the point I can barely cope with the pressure they cause. She has no idea that I’m crazy.

  But I never, not even for a minute, thought that she would believe I’d deliberately hurt her the way she accused me of. Maybe I didn’t really know her either.

  By the time I pull myself together enough to leave the restroom stall, lunch is almost over. Fixing my makeup in the mirror, I suck in a deep breath and stare at myself until my mask is back in place. To the outside world I look mildly annoyed, the perfect resting bitch face that keeps people away, so only the brave risk the wrath they believe I’m capable of inflicting.

  Adding a little extra sway into my step, I walk back to our table and quickly gather up my things. The tremor in my hands is barely perceptible now, but when I look up and find Valentine watching me, I know he saw.

  The smug grin that he flashes back at me confirms my suspicions and I quickly look away, not strong enough or brave enough to deal with his shit on top of everything else that’s been dealt my way today.

  Zeke leads our group from the cafeteria, his face an angry scowl that’s scary enough to have people skittering out of his way. My happy-go-lucky brother rarely ever displays his aggressive, intimidating side, but when he does, he looks so much like dad it’s scary.

  “Nova,” A low voice calls and warm fingers touch my arm lightly.

  Spinning, I find a sheepish looking Henry behind me.

  “What?” I ask, my voice cold.

  “Can I… Could I talk to you for a minute?”

  “No.”

  “Nova, please,” he asks again.

  Sighing, I stop walking then look to my brothers and flash them a reassuring smile as I allow Henry to pull me out of the stream of kids going to class and into a quiet corner.

  “Look,” he starts but I interrupt him.

  “Did you do this? Did you feed Brit a load of bullshit about me?” I ask.

  “No,” he says insistently, shaking his head back and forth. “I swear I didn’t.”

  “Then what do you want?”

  “To apologize for leaving last night. It took me a while to calm down, then I remembered that you didn’t have any way of getting home. I’m not sure if you and Valentine…” he lets his voice trail off.

  “Valentine and I are nothing, not that it’s any of your business, but we’ve never been anything. He’s staying with my aunt and uncle and he’s friends with my brothers, that’s it.”

  “But he said…”

  La
ughing bitterly, I narrow my eyes at him. “Yeah, well maybe you should have asked me before you ran off like a little bitch.” He flinches at my insult, but I don’t stay long enough for him to defend himself. What he did last night was a bitch move, and he knows it. I’m not sure that I believe he didn’t cause all of this drama with Brit; it feels like a bitch move too.

  My indignant anger helps me keep it together for the rest of the day, but by the time I pull into our driveway my body is shaking with barely held back sobs and all I want to do is curl into a ball and drown in my own self-pity.

  My afternoon’s classes were a blur. I don’t know if any of the teachers called on me, because I was barely present. I didn’t take a single note, and I don’t remember anything that was taught. My mind is a rollercoaster of unanswered questions, overwhelming thoughts, and peaked awareness of a thousand prying eyes on me.

  Stumbling from my car, I push open the front door and barrel up the stairs to my room, collapsing onto my bed as the tears overtake me. The loss of my friend mixes with the steadily building pressure in my chest and suddenly life is too big and too hard, and I just don’t want to deal with it anymore. I allow my errant mind to take over and sink into the panic-filled grief.

  Warm, familiar arms wrap around me and I’m no longer lying on my comforter. I’m surrounded by the reassuring embrace of my mom. My entire life, she and my dad have chased away my monsters, wiped away my tears and made everything okay. I might be eighteen, an adult, but right now I need my mom more than anything else in the world.

  “Zeke told me everything, sweetheart. I’m so sorry,” Mom coos, her fingers stroking the back of my head.

  A fresh wave of sobs cascades through me and I cry harder, because this outburst is about so much more than just an argument with my friend, but I can’t tell her that. So instead, I let my mom soothe me in the way only she can.

  The next morning, my eyes are red-rimmed and puffy. I look and feel like shit as I drag myself downstairs for coffee before I’m even dressed.

  “Why are you up so early?” I ask Zeke, when I find him dressed and sipping from a mug at the breakfast counter.

  “I’m taking Emmy for breakfast. I still need to make amends with her. She says she’s forgiven me for being an asshole, but I can see how hurt she is.”

  “Oh, she didn’t mention anything.”

  “Yeah, she doesn’t know yet. I figured if I asked her, she’d say no, but if I just turn up at her house, she’ll be too embarrassed to turn me down.”

  Sighing, I nod, because he’s right, she won’t turn him away in person.

  “I need you to go pick up Valentine.”

  “No way, he can get the bus,” I snap, horrified at the idea of having to spend any time cooped up in a car with him.

  “Don’t be a bitch, Nova. Go pick him up, he’s expecting you.” Zeke says, turning away and not giving me an opportunity to throw back another refusal.

  “Wish me luck,” he calls over his shoulder as he disappears out of the front door.

  With a resigned sigh, I take my coffee back to my bedroom and head for the shower. Thirty minutes later, dressed and ready for school, I step back into the kitchen and find it empty except for my dad who is lazily leaning up against the counter, his cell in one hand and a coffee cup lifted to his lips in the other.

  “Where is everyone?” I ask.

  “Zeke went to grovel to Emmy and your mom had to drive Dill and Leo because they had early football practice,” Dad says without looking away from his cell.

  “Oh.”

  At my single word answer, Dad lowers his cell and looks up at me. “You okay, Princess? I know you and Brit had a falling out.”

  “I’m not okay,” I say and it’s the closest to being honest I’ve been to anyone in months.

  “It’ll work itself out.”

  I shake my head. “I don’t think it will; not this time. This time it was different.”

  Dad nods solemnly and I know he thinks I’m talking about mine and Brit’s fight, but I’m not. I’m talking about the way my meltdowns are escalating and how I feel like I’m constantly fighting the urge to hide away from my life.

  In a single stride, Dad pulls me into his wide chest and I breathe in the familiar scent of leather. “You want me to kick someone’s ass?”

  A giggle bursts from my lips and I smile for the first time in what feels like far too long. “No thank you, Daddy.”

  “Let me know if you change your mind.”

  “I will.”

  “Okay, get going, or you’ll be late for school.”

  Rising up onto my tiptoes, I press a kiss to his cheek, then turn away from him and grab my purse. The ten-minute drive to Auntie Brandi’s house feels like it takes hours, and I almost convince myself to drive straight past a hundred times, before I eventually pull up at the curb and honk my horn.

  A minute later, the front door opens and Valentine emerges, dressed in dark jeans, and a black button-down shirt. A single leather bracelet hangs on his wrist and a scuffed backpack is over his shoulder. Everything about him screams bad boy, from the confident stride, to the way his gaze never strays from the path he’s taking. Like nothing around him is anywhere near as important as wherever he’s going.

  When he reaches my car, he pulls open the door and slides into the seat, pushing his bag to the floor at his feet. “Good morning, Princess,” he drawls. “Looking forward to school today?”

  Ignoring him, I pull away from the curb, focusing all of my attention into driving and pretending the huge, intimidating boy sat next to me isn’t staring at me with amusement pouring from him.

  “Such a shame how friendships can be broken. She was one of your best friends too. You must be pretty cut up.”

  When I don’t respond, he tuts quietly. “It’s all your own fault too. All that nastiness could have been avoided.”

  “What?” I say before I can stop myself.

  His lips spread into a cruel grin. “All you had to do was kiss me and all of that unpleasant drama wouldn’t have happened.”

  “What are you talking about?” I try to demand, but my voice betrays me coming out small and timid.

  This time he turns his head fully to look at me and despite the cars around me and the fact that I know I should be concentrating on the road ahead; I get caught in his gaze and can’t look away.

  “I warned you, Nova. If you wanted to keep your perfect little world intact all you had to do was offer me an incentive.”

  Glancing at the road for moment, I allow my eyes to fall back to his face and I gape at him, unsure what the hell is going on. I can see the school ahead of us, but I turn on my flasher and pull to the side of the road, killing the engine and turning to look at the boy next to me.

  “You did it? You told Brit that I was sleeping with all the guys she liked?”

  “No, of course not,” he says, his face a pleasant mask.

  “But you just said….”

  “High schools are such predictable places. It’s so easy to spread rumors.”

  “Why?”

  “Because I can and because you defied me. I asked you for something and you denied me, so I took something from you.”

  “You destroyed an eight-year friendship because I wouldn’t kiss you?” I ask, aghast.

  “I didn’t destroy anything, Brit did.”

  “Why do you want me to kiss you so badly? Why not just take it again?” I ask, my voice shaking.

  “You’re so cold, then so warm. I want to see which is the real you and I can take a kiss from you whenever I want. But what would be more fun is watching as you give me your lips. I want to see the look on your face when you realize you have no choice but to play my game.”

  For a long moment I just sit staring at him, shocked by his words.

  “We should go, we’re going to be late.” His voice kicks my synapses back to life and without another word I start the car’s engine and pull back onto the road and into the school grounds. My space i
s empty and almost on autopilot I drive into the bay and kill the engine.

  Reaching for my seatbelt, Valentine’s firm fingers grip my hand. “Today’s a new day, Princess. I’m prepared to forgive yesterday and offer you a new deal. We’re going to get out of the car, then you’re going to walk to me and kiss me.”

  “No,” I splutter. “No, I’m not.”

  His smile is wide and chilling. “I was only getting started yesterday and it took less than twenty minutes to alienate one of your best friends. Do you think defying me again is a good idea? Who else are you prepared to lose? Imagine how hurt Zeke would be if Griffin abandoned him, how devastated Emmy would be if suddenly everyone was talking about how both you and Zeke pity her because she’s so ugly and boring. Or maybe the whole school could receive an anonymous video of you in the shower, your naked body all glistening and wet. How long do you think it would take for that picture to be uploaded to every porn site on the internet? How ashamed do you think your dad would be to have his ‘Princess’ used as an image for dirty old men to whack off to?”

  Bile rises in my throat and I have to cover my mouth, as I listen to all the ways this man could try to ruin mine and my family’s lives. He hates me, he really fucking hates me, and if any of what he’s saying is true, he’s prepared to hurt everyone around me to make me do what he wants.

  I’m nodding before I can change my mind. If a kiss is all it will take to keep his evil actions away from my life, then I can do that. It’s only a kiss after all.

  “Good girl, Princess. You’re a quick study, I like that,” he says, smiling brightly as he removes his hand from mine and climbs out of the car.