by Kaylee Ryan
Unlocking the door, I see the glow of a light upstairs. Kinley must have forgotten to turn it off. Even though I’m dead on my feet, I rush up the stairs to see how much she got done. Sure enough, the light to the nursery is on and I’m shocked to see it’s done. The walls are painted in a color that Kinley informed me is a medium lavender. To me, it just looks like a light purple.
The room looks as if a professional came in and did it. The tarp that I laid down for her is gone as are all of the painting supplies. Hard-headed as ever, it’s obvious she ignored my ‘wait for me for the ladder’ warning I gave her. I swallow back the lump in my throat.
This is real.
In just four short months, my baby girl is going to be here. I will never be able to thank Kinley enough for everything she’s done. Pulling out my phone, I swipe the screen and see it’s just after nine. I helped the crew feed and water all the horses before heading home. Surely, she’s still up. I decide to send her a text first.
Evan: You up?
I hear a beep of a cell phone. Did she leave her phone here? I follow the sound across the hall to my room. Opening the door, I allow the light from the nursery to light the room. That’s when I see her. Kinley is curled up on my bed, phone clutched in her hands. Surveying the room, I see a floral-looking bag sitting on the floor. My eyes roam over her and I see her hair is damp. She must have brought clothes to change into. McKinley was wet and naked in my shower, in my room.
Fuck me.
Even as tired as I am, my body responds to just the thought of her wet and naked. Moving further into the room, I slowly take a seat on the edge of the bed, careful not to wake her. There’s no one here to witness me lusting after my best friend’s little sister, my friend. She’s been a pillar of strength for me these past couple of months. I honestly don’t know what I would do without her.
Her phone beeps again, reminding me of the text I sent her. I freeze, waiting to see if the sound wakes her.
It doesn’t.
A loose strand of hair is hanging down in her eyes. Ever so gently, I tuck it back behind her ear. It doesn’t wake her up and I’m relieved I get her like this for just a little while longer. I know I should wake her up and sitting here memorizing what she looks like in the moment, curled up in my bed, is wrong. I just can’t seem to find the will to care.
Her phone dings again, and this time she stirs, causing that errant strand of hair I’d just moved to once again obstruct my view. Just as my hand goes to move it, her eyes slowly open. She recognizes me right away, and a soft smile graces her lips. “Hey,” she says, her voice laced with sleep.
My hand has a mind of its own as I find myself cupping her cheek. “Hey, you wore yourself out today.” It’s not a question. She did a hell of a lot of work today for my daughter and me.
Her eyes light at my words. “Did you see it?” she asks.
“I did. It’s perfect.” You’re perfect.
“It turned out better than I expected,” she confesses.
My hand is still cupping her cheek and I know it’s all kinds of wrong. I run my thumb across her cheek and reluctantly release my hold on her. I can’t bring her into all this drama. She deserves nothing but the best, more than what I could give her. Not to mention, I’m sure my best friend would kick my ass if I tried to date his sister. I just need to learn to control my hormones when I’m alone with her.
“I’m glad you went with white furniture.”
Sitting up, she leans against the headboard. “Yeah, with the white trim and the color of the walls, it’s really going to stand out. I can’t wait until you get it all put together.”
I groan at the thought. “I’ll start on it this weekend.” I know she’s itching to decorate now that the painting is done.
“Good. I’ll tell Aaron he has to come help. Between the three of us, we should be able to whip it out in no time.”
“You’ve done enough,” I tell her.
“This is my project, mister. No way am I missing it.”
“What time did you finish?”
Blinking, she looks down at her phone. “About an hour ago. Sorry I dozed off.” I can barely see the tint of red coloring her face from the small amount of light in the room.
“Have you eaten?” My guess is she worked all day to get the room completed.
Her belly growls, not giving her time to answer. “All right then. Let me grab a quick shower and we can go grab something to eat.” I stand from the bed.
“Deal.” Her grin turns into a yawn as she stretches her arms above her head. The t-shirt she’s wearing lifts and shows her toned stomach. I force my eyes to close and turn away from her. I busy myself with pulling clean clothes out of my dresser.
“I’ll be quick.”
“Good, I’m starving. I’m going to go check out my mad painting skills. I’ll wait downstairs.”
I hear her climb off the bed, her feet hit the floor, and the click of my bedroom door as she closes it behind her. I exhale a breath I didn’t even realize I was holding.
I’ve got to get my shit together.
I rush through my shower and meet Kinley downstairs in less than fifteen minutes. “What are you in the mood for?” I ask, shoving my wallet and my phone in my pocket.
“I’m open to anything; just nothing that’s going to take forever.”
“I think I can manage that.”
The drive into town is filled with talk of furniture assembly and decorating ideas. The pressure I feel when I think about all that needs to be done before my daughter arrives lessens the more Kinley talks. She’s willing to take the lead and I’m letting her. I want to be involved, but shit, I’m in over my head. I’m scared to death for my kid.
We find ourselves at Subway. “Great choice,” Kinley says as she takes the first big bite of her meatball sub. She’s refreshing. She’s never afraid to speak her mind or be herself. Most girls order a salad and pick at it. I don’t know if it’s because I’ve known her all my life, or if it’s because she’s really just that girl—confident and sure. I’m going to go with the latter.
“So, I’m thinking about going to visit my parents and grandparents before the baby comes.”
“That’s a great idea. I’m sure you miss them. How’s your dad doing?”
Misty never once asked how my father was. I never realized how disconnected we really were, until now. “Same. Mom says he started a new chemo. So far, he seems to be adjusting to it well.”
“When were you thinking of going to see them?”
“In a few weeks. I have a lot to do before the baby gets here, but I need to see them, you know?”
“You should go. Family is important,” she says.
“Yeah. I think I’ll fly. It will give me more time with them. I don’t see them coming back here any time soon. Dad really likes his oncologist.”
“I’m sure it’s hard to be away from them, especially with all the changes going on in your life.”
I nod. She gets it---gets me. She’s so easy to talk to. I’ve never been one to open up, unless it was to Aaron. There’s nothing he doesn’t know about me. Well, there is one thing. If he knew the thoughts I’m having about his baby sister, he would kick my ass.
The flight to Alabama is uneventful. I spent the entire time running through everything that still needs to be done. I’m trying really hard not to freak the fuck out that in just a little over three months I’m going to be a daddy. I’m going to be responsible for a tiny human and all her needs. I’m a little overwhelmed.
I traveled light with just a carry-on, so I can avoid the whole baggage claim fiasco. I’m searching the crowd for my mom. She insisted she pick me up. I hear her before I see her.
“Evan!” She’s already in a sprint toward me, so I stop and drop my bag to the floor, preparing for impact. When she reaches me, I wrap my arms around her and pick her up in a tight hug. “I’ve missed you.”
“Missed you too,” I say, placing her back on her feet. “How’s Dad today?”
“He’s feeling good. This new chemo doesn’t make him as sick,” she explains. “Let’s get you home.”
I nod my agreement and pick my bag back up. Throwing my arm over her shoulder, we leave the airport.
“How are Grandma and Grandpa?” I ask once we are on the road.
“Good, it’s hard living back home with my parents after all these years.” She laughs. “It’s like it doesn’t matter that I’m forty-eight years old, married with a child of my own. I go right back to feeling like a teenager again.”
“Grandma always was a caretaker,” I agree.
“Yeah, she fusses over your dad constantly and some days it drives him crazy. He just wants to be left alone. We’ve thought of buying a house or renting an apartment, but it just seems crazy when it’s just the two of them in that big old house. Not to mention, it’s nice to have the help, especially on the bad days.”
We don’t really talk about the “bad days.” I know they are there, but they try and shelter me from it as much as possible. Like my Grandma, Mom often forgets I’m an adult she can lean on for support. Hell, I’m about to be a dad.
Mom and I spend the rest of the drive just catching up. Before I know it, we’re pulling into the driveway. The first thing I see is my dad and my mom’s parents sitting on the front porch waiting for us. Until this moment, I didn’t realize how much I’ve missed them.
“Evan,” my dad says as I clear the final porch step. He slowly rises from the rocker he’s sitting in and walks toward me. Reaching me, he pulls me into a hug. I notice his hold is not as tight as it used to be. He’s losing his strength. I feel guilty for not coming with them to help Mom take care of things---take care of him.
“Jeff, you need to share,” I hear my grandma say beside us. Dad releases me with a chuckle that quickly turns to a cough.
Grandma pulls me into a hug, with Grandpa reaching out to shake my hand. “We missed you,” Grandma says.
“Congratulations, Evan,” my grandpa says. He’s always been a straight shooter. He’s the first one to mention I’m going to be a father. I was shocked Mom didn’t bring it up on the way here.
“Thank you.”
“Well, I have lunch ready. Let’s head inside,” Grandma instructs.
Everyone heads into the kitchen. I drop my bag by the door and dig out the ultrasound pictures. Taking the empty seat across from my parents, I reach over and hand them to my mom. I watch as a slow smile forms and tears well up in her eyes.
“I can’t believe I’m going to be a grandma,” she says, never taking her eyes off the pictures.
I think the staff at Misty’s OB office feels sorry for me. They printed out almost twenty pictures. I have one on my fridge at home. Kinley is actually the one who put it there. She, Aaron, and I were working on assembling all the furniture for the baby’s room. Kinley stopped to make us a late lunch. When she called us to the kitchen, I noticed it was hanging there. I remember I pointed to it and she shrugged her shoulders, and said, “I just thought she should be here with us.” I’m glad Aaron was there. If he hadn’t been, I would have grabbed her and kissed the hell out of her.
“Do you have a name?” Grandma asks, pulling me out of my thoughts.
“No, not yet. I just…It’s a big deal.”
Dad laughs. “Yeah, I remember it took us seeing you before we actually decided on a name.”
Mom reaches over and lays her hand on top of his. “You just looked like an Evan to us,” she laughs.
I wish I had that. I wish I had a partner to stand by my side. I only have myself to blame.
“Yeah, I haven’t thought about it too much. I’ve been busy getting everything I’ll need. McKinley has been a huge help. I gave her my credit card and told her to have at it. It’s overwhelming, everything a baby needs,” I confess. I dig my cell phone out of my pocket and pull up my photo gallery. I bring up the recent pictures I took of the nursery after we got all the furniture assembled.
“Here’s the room. Kinley’s done most of it. She painted it all while I was branding cattle. She also picked out the furniture and helped Aaron and me put it all together last weekend.”
Mom and Grandma talk about how pretty it is and how the white furniture really stands out with the color of the walls. All the same things Kinley had said.
“She’s done a great job. I love the room,” Mom says, handing my phone back to me.
“She really has. I don’t know what I would do without her.”
“How are they, McKinley and Aaron?” she asks.
“Good. Aaron and Jerry are still partners, although Jerry keeps saying he’s ready to retire and work for Aaron,” I laugh.
“I’m sure he is,” Dad says. “It’s hard work.”
“And McKinley?” Mom prompts.
“She’s great. She graduated a few months ago, so she’s living at home, which I think I told you. Jerry and Sarah gave her the space above the garage and she’s turned it into a studio for her photography. You should see some of her pictures. She’s really good. She’s been great about helping me shop and set the baby’s room up. She made me a list of everything I still need to do and has even convinced me I need a new truck.” I stop talking when I realize I’ve been gushing about her.
Looking around at my family, I see my praise didn’t go unnoticed. Dad and Grandpa are smirking at me; Mom and Grandma are wearing grins that could light up the state of Alabama.
“I’m glad she’s been such a help,” Mom says.
I nod. “She really has.” I dig into my food, hoping to end this part of the conversation.
The last five days have flown by. I’ve enjoyed spending time with my parents and grandparents. I don’t get to see them nearly enough. Dad, Grandpa, and I went fishing. It was great to spend that time with them. I could tell it wore Dad out, but he insisted we go.
Grandma and Mom purchased the largest suitcase I’ve ever seen and filled it to the point of bursting at the seams with baby items. Grandma made her a quilt, while Mom went crazy with dresses and what she called onesies, socks, and a whole bunch of other stuff I have no idea about, like burp cloths.
Mom drove me to the airport and it was a tearful goodbye. I’ll miss them, but once I’m boarded on the way back to Kentucky, it’s Kinley who filters through my mind.
Chapter 12
McKinley
Evan comes home today.
That’s my first thought as I slowly open my eyes to the early morning sun. We’ve texted a couple of times since he’s been gone, but it’s not the same. I think this is the longest we’ve gone without seeing each other since I’ve been home.
I’ve missed him.
I know it’s wrong and we’re just friends, but a girl can miss her friend, right? Groaning at my thought process, I reach for my phone. I see I have a missed text from Aaron.
Aaron: Morning! Text me when you roll your sleepy ass out of bed. I
have a favor.
Checking the time of the message, I see it was sent at 5:55 this morning. It’s now 8:02.
Me: What’s up?
Aaron: I was supposed to pick Evan up from the airport, but one of the
horses is sick. I’ve been in the stables since about two. Anyway, can you pick him up for me?
Today is Sunday, and I don’t have anything on the books for the studio. Being a photographer, I don’t have a traditional nine-to-five schedule and I love it.
Me: Sure, what time is his flight?
Aaron: Lands at two.
Me: Got it.
Aaron: You’re the best sister ever!
Me: LOL. Remember that when I come cashing in my IOU.
Aaron: You got it, little sister.
I smile at our banter. I love my brother. We’re friends just as much as we are siblings. I wonder what he would think about the thoughts I’ve been having about his best friend. When I was younger, I had the biggest crush on Evan. Now, this is…different. I can only assume it’s because we’re older, but my thoughts an
d these feelings go deeper than my teenage crush. When I was younger, I just wanted his attention and wondered what it would be like to walk down the halls of the high school holding his hand, being his girlfriend. Now, I want to trace every inch of him with my tongue. I want to strip him naked and have my way with him. Definitely not a schoolgirl crush.
I’m excited for him to come home. Yesterday afternoon, Mom and the ladies from church had Ethel’s ‘great-grandmother-to-be’ shower. The ladies really went overboard with the gifts. Ethel was in tears, so overwhelmed by the support. If I heard it once yesterday, I heard it a thousand times, that Evan is such a great guy and they commend him for doing this on his own. If they only knew how scared he is. I think I’m the only one who gets to see that side of him, well, besides Aaron.
Mom and I drove Ethel home with Mom’s Jeep Cherokee loaded down with gifts. Ethel asked us if we would just go ahead and take them to Evan’s to prevent having to transfer them today when he gets home. I agreed and used the key he told me to just keep for now. I’ve been in and out of his place so often helping him with the room, he said it was easier than hiding it under the rock every day.
Rolling out of bed, I grab a quick shower and throw on my signature jean shorts, tank, and cowboy boots. I’m in the kitchen toasting a bagel when Mom walks in.
“Good morning,” she chirps.
“Morning.”
“I still can’t believe all the gifts. The ladies really outdid themselves,” Mom says.
“They really did. I’m relieved because he needs everything.”
“He comes home today, right?” she asks.
“Yeah, I’m actually picking him up from the airport. Aaron was supposed to, but I guess he’s been up with a sick horse all night.”
“Yeah, your dad’s been out there too. He came in about six this morning and I packed them both a big breakfast. They were still waiting for the vet to get here.”
