I must stop this.
I lurch up out of my seat, ready to go talk some sense into Cal, when large hands roughly grab my hips and painfully push me back down into my seat. Sean wraps his left arm around me, his hand grabbing my forearm and forcing it onto the top of the table. He hauls my right side into his hard chest, squeezing me into him.
“Let me go, Sean!” I try pushing at him, but it is as if I am pushing against a brick wall. Panic starts to seize me at the thought of having to watch this horrible nightmare. “I just want to go congratulate Cal,” I lie, my voice unsteady from the nervous breakdown that I am about to have. The people at our table turn to give us weird looks, but their focus is drawn back to the stage when a small ensemble of four men start to play A Thousand Years with their string instruments. All eyes focus on the door to the house, but mine are trained on Cal. His eyes reveal the moment Jenna has come into his view as they start to sparkle with unabashed desire, his full lips breaking into a breathtaking smile filled with love and happiness that makes me inhale sharply. It is a look I have never seen on his face for as long as I have known him.
Like a slow moving train wreck that you can’t help but watch, Jenna enters my view, slowly walking towards the stage to marry the man that is supposed to be mine. She is wearing an off the shoulder, white bohemian mermaid style fitted lace wedding dress with a slit up the front and a sweetheart neckline that shows the top of her breasts. Her caramel colored hair is styled down in long waves, her makeup heavy on the eyes with pale pink lipstick shimmering on her lips. She is carrying a large pale pink peony bouquet that she hands to Avery before climbing the stairs to join Cal. She stands in front of him and he grabs her hands, squeezing them in encouragement. You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen, he mouths right before Robert starts officiating.
This really is a wedding and not a birthday party.
This can’t be happening to me!
He’s getting married and it isn’t to me!
I attempt one more time to get out of my seat, but Sean only tightens his grip on me. “You will sit here and watch the person you call your best friend marry the woman of his dreams. You will not make a fucking sound or I will drag you inside the house and strangle you myself,” he whispers with malice into my ear. I look around in shock as reality starts to grip my heart and squeezes the life out of it once Robert starts talking about why God intended for the union between Cal and Jenna.
My heart goes numb as Jenna says her vows, telling Cal he is her forever soulmate.
My heart starts cracking as Cal says his vows, telling Jenna that she, and no one else, was made for him.
And my heart finally shatters when they are officially pronounced man and wife. Cal lifts Jenna off the ground in a bear hug and crushes his mouth to hers, their tongues lost inside of each other as their mouths fuse together to become one.
The noise of the crowd’s cheers is deafening and Sean has to pull me up to stand when everyone rises to watch Cal and Jenna make their way off the stage and go back into the house to have a private moment with their immediate family.
“Now you know exactly what it feels like to officially not be wanted by the one person you want the most.” Sean’s words break me out of my trance and as soon as I feel his grip loosen, I bolt for the house, needing to remove myself as far away as possible before I do something to get myself arrested. The crowd blocks my way towards the main entrance back into the house, so I run toward the sliding glass doors that leads into the kitchen.
“We need to leave now!” I bark into my cell phone when my driver picks up. I hang up on him as I open the doors, slam them shut and make my way through the kitchen. I stop short when I see a tray filled with champagne in flute glasses waiting by the door to be taken out. Without caring who sees, I deliberately push the tray off the table, the sounds of glass breaking bringing some satisfaction to my black, cold heart.
I ignore the shouts behind me as I run through the foyer and exit the main door. I run toward the street where all the cars are parked and don’t stop running until I see the SUV I came in. The driver already has the car turned on and opens the door for me as soon as I reach it.
“Hurry, we need to get out of here.” I grab the handle of the door while he races around the car to get in. The tires burn rubber as the car races to get out of the neighborhood. I turn around to look out the window as we move farther away from the house. Tears that I never knew I could even produce start leaking out of my eyes and down my cheeks when the house disappears out of my view. I face forward and cry harder as the replay of events from the past thirty minutes flash through my brain.
“I got photos of the whole wedding! Did you know about it?” My driver asks, excitement lighting up his eyes as he looks at me through the rearview mirror. This type of story is going to make him a lot of money.
“Do I look like I fucking knew about it?” I hiss, black mascara streaming down my face from my tears as my heart grieves for the loss of the love of my life.
“Chill the fuck out. Just because they are married doesn’t mean it’s the end all be all.” The driver looks at me with disgust and focuses his attention on the road. At first, I am insulted that he told me to chill the fuck out. How dare he talk to ME that way! But then his words start resonating within me and as the city’s skyline comes into view, I calm down and clear my mind.
Marriages can end as quickly as they started.
I still have a press tour to do with Cal.
One that will have moments of Jenna not being around.
A smile of hope plays on my lips as I realize that the driver is right and I start to put a plan into motion.
This press tour is my last shot at making Cal mine and I don’t plan on blowing it.
14
Isla
“My mommy looked like a princess tonight, didn’t she, Izzy?” Avery says in her sleepy voice as I carry her up the stairs to her room to go to sleep.
“She sure did, Avery Boo,” I grunt out as I make it to the last step of the stairs, which is no small task carrying around an extra fifty pounds and having little arms wrapped around your neck, suffocating you. It is way past Avery’s bed time, but well worth it since we were celebrating her parents’ wedding. Not many kids get to be part of that experience and Avery took full advantage of it. While I put her brother to bed after family photos were done, Avery got to stay up to enjoy the party. When I arrived back downstairs, she was the center of attention on the dance floor with her family and their friends. She was having the time of her life, but when Jenna said it was time for her to finally go to bed, she was delirious with exhaustion and didn’t even attempt to argue with her mother.
“Will I be as pretty as my mommy when I am an adult, Izzy?” I set her down in front of me and help get her out of her dress and into her pajamas.
“Absolutely, but what does your mommy tell you about being pretty, Avery?” I walk her to her bathroom and get her toothbrush ready for her. She can do all of this herself, but she is moving at a snail’s pace and I am afraid she might just plop on the floor and call it a night if we don’t speed up the bedtime process.
“If you are pretty on the inside by being kind and respectful, then you are pretty on the outside too,” she mutters before I stick the toothbrush into her mouth and brush her teeth for her. Less than five minutes after tucking her in, she is dreaming about rainbows and unicorns. I shut her door softly and am about to go to my own room, when my phone buzzes with a text message from Robert.
Robert: Come down to the right side fire pit and hang out with us.
The time on my cell phone says it’s ten o’clock and with the noise level from outside as loud as it is, the party does not seem to be slowing down anytime soon. Attempting to go to bed would be pointless, so I make my way back downstairs to join the party.
The DJ is playing the latest electronic dance music and the dance floor is packed. I get a glimpse of Jenna dancing with Cal’s sisters as I walk past them toward
the fire pit. Cal, Robert, Kellan, Sean, Chase and Layla are sitting around the fire, drinking and telling stories when I arrive.
“Isla, were the kids okay?” Cal asks, concern laced in his voice. He is holding a glass of bourbon, his new piece of hardware on his left hand shining in the light of the fire.
“They were so exhausted from the excitement of tonight. Can’t blame them, really. I am tired from the excitement of tonight!” I laugh, shaking my head in astonishment still from the surprise. “Why did you guys not tell any of us?”
“We had to tell Robert, because we wanted him to get ordained in order to marry us. Plus, Jenna needed help planning it.” He looks down at his ring, a faint smile touching his lips. “We’ve actually been legally married for a month now.”
“What?” Robert and Layla shriek in shock, indicating that this is news to both of them. Robert and Layla are Jenna’s closest friends. I can’t even begin to imagine how hard it was for Jenna not to tell them.
“Seriously, Cal? You couldn’t even tell me about this?” Sean actually looks hurt by the news and a part of me feels bad for him. The smallest of parts as I am still upset with him for going to dinner with Cora the other night. Not that it is any of my business, but it makes it hard for me to take him seriously about him being over her.
“It’s nothing personal, Sean.” Cal then looks over at Robert and says, “Remember when I came to the office to meet Jenna for lunch?” Robert nods his head at the memory. “Do you remember how happy I was when we returned?”
“Yes, but I just figured you guys had a quickie at Jenna’s old condo.”
“Well, of course we did,” Cal says nonchalantly, “but the night before, I asked her why she wouldn’t marry me. She just shrugged her shoulders and responded back with who said that she wouldn’t? I thought she was bluffing, so I decided to test her and when I picked her up for lunch that next day, I took her straight to the courthouse to see how she would react. To my surprise, she grabbed my hand and marched us into the City Clerk’s office and an hour later, we were legally married.”
“Wow,” I say in awe at how romantic the story is, how much in love Cal really is with Jenna. That is exactly the kind of love I want to find. But that kind of love is one in a million and usually does not come easy. It didn’t for Cal and Jenna.
“Why didn’t you guys at least tell us that? I feel deceived,” Robert pouts, looking like a child who was just denied candy.
“Because we wanted to have something to ourselves for once. With our life being so public, I am shocked that the news didn’t even get out with marriage licenses being public record.”
“Why keep the wedding a surprise though? I am pissed that I didn’t get to be the maid of honor,” Layla says, as she snuggles closer to Chase, whose arm is around her shoulders.
“We were worried that if it was public knowledge, some people might try to stop it.” Cal looks uneasily at Sean, who looks down at his beer bottle and fiddles with the label.
“If you are referring to Cora, I heard she made quite a mess in the kitchen.” Kellan tells the story about the event staff seeing her push off the tray of champagne glasses from the table. I look over at Sean, my eyes questioning him in silence. He meets my gaze and shrugs before taking a sip from his beer. “So keeping the wedding a secret was probably a smart decision.”
“Are you guys going on a honeymoon?” I ask in curiosity. Cal and Jenna mentioned they have travel arrangements before the next press tour, but kept it vague as to where the location was and if the kids and I were going with them.
“Yes, we are. We’ll be leaving for Bora Bora on Tuesday, but before then, we will be escorting you, the kids and my family to Disneyland.” Cal smiles at me as my mouth drops open in shock for the second time tonight.
“Are we really going to Disneyland?” I whisper as that is the one place I have never been to and have always wanted to go. The inner child in me is jumping for joy, but what I’m really excited about is how the children react.
“We will leave Monday and go straight there, because Jenna and I don’t want to miss seeing Avery’s reaction. We will spend the whole day there and then Jenna and I will fly out Tuesday for five glorious days in an expensive hut in the middle of the ocean where we will work hard at populating this world with more Harringtons.” We all laugh at Cal, knowing that Jenna isn’t receptive to the idea of having another baby just yet… or ever again.
“Good luck persuading Jenna to stop taking her birth control,” Robert says sarcastically. “That woman makes sure she pops that pill exactly at the same time every day.”
“That won’t be an obstacle.” Cal shrugs his shoulders, determination set in his eyes. “I plan on wearing her out so much that she won’t hear her cell phone alarm going off with her reminder.” I laugh at the arrogance in his voice, but I have no doubt that the man fully plans on executing his plan of wearing Jenna out sexually, especially since there won’t be any children around to distract her.
“While that might seem like a good plan, what if she has the new kind of birth control that gets inserted inside of you?” Layla questions Cal with a raised eyebrow.
“I have checked that area very thoroughly and I can assure you she has nothing inserted inside of her.” He smirks while Robert makes gagging noises at the mental image that is going through his brain.
“To much information, but there are other areas you can insert birth control in, like your arm.”
“What freaky ass science experiment is that?” Kellan exclaims, his face distorted in disgust. “Why would women do that to themselves?”
“Because some women aren’t good at remembering to take pills every day, let alone setting an alarm to remind them,” Layla responds and I’m wondering if she’s one of those women with the way she sheepishly looks at Chase. I, on the other hand, am like Jenna and make it a priority to take mine every single day, despite not currently being in a sexual relationship.
“Jenna’s too granola for that shit, right Cal?” All eyes go to Cal, who actually has a look of doubt on his face.
“Would you be able to feel it in her arm if she does have one?” Cal pulls out his phone to start researching it.
“I think I heard that you can,” I respond and we all laugh at the look on Cal’s face as he gets up and walks over to where his wife is located on the dance floor. He starts dancing behind her, but his awkward groping of her biceps makes her turn around with a quizzical look at him. The scene unfolding makes us laugh harder as they both stop dancing and he inspects her biceps more closely. When Cal finishes his inspection, he smiles brightly at her, grabs her and kisses her while his hands make their way toward her backside to bring her closer against him. The DJ decides to play a slow song and we watch as Cal and Jenna gaze into each other’s eyes as the outside world fades for them.
“Dance with me.” The words are commanded huskily into my ear from behind, causing me to jump. I didn’t notice or hear Sean get up and walk behind my chair and as I stare into his moss colored eyes, I feel my will power slipping. I don’t know if it’s because of my body’s reaction to him or because we’re at a wedding, but I want to dance. I want to be held in someone’s arms. So I nod my head yes and place my hand in his as he helps me up and leads me to the dance floor.
I place my left hand on his shoulder while he takes my right hand into his warm, strong one. I feel his other fingers digging into the small of my back as he brings me right into his chest. My nipples stand to attention as they come in contact with him. He smells like home, making me struggle in refraining from closing my eyes and inhaling his scent. I swallow the lump of lust in my throat as he brings our hands to rest over his heart.
“Are you okay tonight?” I quietly ask, needing to start some sort of conversation with him to distract my hand from rubbing up and down his chest.
“Yeah, I’m fine. I understand why Cal didn’t tell me anything.”
“I didn’t mean about Cal, I meant about Cora.” I meet his gaze,
wanting to watch his eyes as I say her name. Hurt and betrayal briefly flash through them before he puts his acting mask back on. He gives me a sad smile and shakes his head.
“I don’t know who Cora is anymore. Maybe I never truly did know her. Maybe I have just been blind by my feelings for her. But I’m not blind anymore, Isla.“ He releases his hand from mine to caress my cheek. I close my eyes, relishing in the pleasure of his touch, needing it to continue. I open my eyes to see his fixated on my lips. He takes his thumb and gently rubs it against my lower lip, causing my lips to part. My breath exhales as I debate whether or not to suck on it.
“Ladies and Gentlemen, this will be the last song of the evening. So let’s make it memorable!” The DJ announces as he plays Crazy In Love by Beyonce.
“Spend the night with me, Isla,” Sean demands as we look into each other’s eyes, slowly swaying together to the beat of our hearts and not the music. I believe him when he says he’s trying to get over Cora, but in no way do I want to be just a rebound for him. He sees my hesitation as I look away from him to contemplate the idea. He grabs my chin between his fingers, forcing me to look up at him. “I just want to hold you, Isla. That’s all I want for tonight at least.”
The idea that Sean wants more nights with me makes my heart soar, despite the warning bells going off inside of me, the ones screaming that I need to stay away from him.
But I am tired of staying away from Sean Lindsey.
I nod my head yes and he presses his forehead against mine, closing his eyes. “Thank you,” he whispers before kissing my forehead. He takes my hand and walks us to the house. We walk in silence to his room, which is conveniently located far away from the rest of the bedrooms in the house. He opens the door, flicks the lights on and closes the door after I follow him in. My feet refuse to move as I stand frozen in place, suddenly feeling awkward being alone in his room with him. He walks around me to the dresser and pulls out a white t-shirt. He comes over and stands right in front of me, his eyes raking over the dark green dress I am wearing.
Edge of Desire Page 10
