by D. M. Shane
Hints of cinnamon and clove tickled my senses, and a feeling of rightness wrapped itself around me. The apprehension I’d felt for so long faded. Arkkadian rubbed a hand up and down my arm in a soothing motion as if he understood exactly how I felt, which really didn’t surprise me. He always seemed to have a sixth sense when it came to my emotions. Maybe it was the bond. I didn’t know. I still had a hard time believing we were somehow linked, despite feeling connected.
“Good. Make sure you turn him over to Randall, along with the evidence, and then finish the security updates as quick as possible. The fool didn’t learn his lesson last time. We don’t want any of our people to get hurt or killed by mistake, especially the children. Thanks, James.”
When he hung up, Arkkadian gave me a squeeze and kissed the top of my head. I wanted to stay wrapped in the comfort of his embrace, the feeling of rightness settling somewhere deep down inside me.
“Is everything okay?” I asked.
“Yes, everything’s fine. We just have a poacher who seems to think he can encroach on our land any time he wants. This is the second time we’ve caught him crossing into our territory. James will see that he’s turned over to Fish and Game,” he explained.
“Is this why you’re updating security?”
“Partly. Until we know Kane’s whereabouts, we need to take all necessary precautions to keep you safe. Our security system is state-of-the-art, but it’s not foolproof. So, I’m having my team install additional cameras around our land and add a few other upgrades. Kane’s come after you twice already. I expect he won’t give up.”
I shivered, leaning further into Arkkadian’s strong arms and buried my face in his chest. He tightened his arms around me in response and stroked the back of my head, fingers curling gently through my hair. The thought of Kane coming back terrified me. I inhaled, and his warm scent of cinnamon and clove washed over me again, soothing away that fear, making me feel safe. At least for the time being.
“Hey, aren’t you supposed to be finding us another movie to watch?” he asked, rubbing my back. I knew he sensed my uneasiness over Kane.
I looked up and gave him a half-smile. “I got distracted. I smelled the soup and then wondered why you hadn’t returned. And now I’m wicked hungry.” I leaned over the stockpot and took a whiff.
“Yeah. I heard your stomach grumbling all the way from the den. Again,” he teased.
I laughed. “I can’t help it. It smells so good. Besides, you’re the one responsible for my stomach turning inside out,” I teased back. I liked this playful side of Arkkadian.
He winced. “I’m so sorry about that. Really. But I’m glad to see you got your appetite back. It makes me feel a lot better.”
“Don’t worry about it.” I shrugged.
When the soup was ready, Arkkadian ladled the delicious smelling concoction into my bowl. I wondered if my stomach could handle it and the thought reminded me of our earlier conversation before I’d so ungracefully deposited my breakfast on his boots.
“Hey. What was that thing you called me earlier? Aeterna? Aeteru?” I stumbled over the word as Arkkadian looked up from filling his bowl.
“Aeternus. I wasn’t sure if you remembered, considering.” He inclined his head to the side with a wink, and I flushed with embarrassment all over again.
“I’m so sorry! Truly. Please tell me I didn’t ruin your boots? I’ll buy you a new pair. I swear.” With what money, though?
Arkkadian just laughed. “You worry too much. It’s okay. Sara took them with her, she’ll clean them and they’ll be good as new.” He smiled warmly and tugged on a lock of my hair. “It’s not a big deal. Those boots have seen much dirtier days than that.”
He led me back to the table, and we sat down, the movie all but forgotten. I took a bite of my soup and moaned with delight. My stomach rumbled in appreciation.
“Oh, this is so good.” I reveled in all the flavors dancing across my tongue. Sara’s soup was perfect.
“So how much do you remember?”
I shook my head. “Not much. I know you explained it, but I just don’t remember.”
“Well, Aeternus literally means eternal. For life. Or soul mate, as I said before. All females are born Aeternus and bound to their human form. Centuries ago, however, all Aeternus could take the form of their mates. They were called Immortalle, but their ability died out and there hasn’t been an Immortalle in several centuries,” he explained while I devoured my meal.
“I still don’t understand. How do you know I’m an Aeternus? Or that I’m yours?”
“Do you remember what I explained about scents?” he asked. I nodded. That, I remembered.
“That’s one way. The rest is kind of hard to explain. Think of it like a guitar string connecting two points, and when it’s plucked, both ends feel the ripple. We feel it. Our animals feel it. It’s an instinct we feel soul-deep. It’s stronger for the male because we have this innate need to protect what’s ours. We’re possessive and dominant by nature. You’ve felt the pull, your body knows. The more time we spend together, the stronger it gets. Even now, you’re already more comfortable around me, aren’t you?”
I knew exactly what he meant with the guitar string analogy. That explained almost perfectly what I felt every time Arkkadian was near. Every time he touched me. And when we weren’t in the same room, it felt like something was missing.
“It’s weird. Somehow, I know I should trust you, even though I don’t really know you. I’m having trouble reconciling the two,” I told him. “It’s really confusing.”
“I get it. If you’d been raised with Pack instead, this all would have made so much more sense.”
I sat silently for a moment, processing the information when something he said caught my attention. “You said Immortalle could shift.”
“Yes, but only when the bond between mates is complete.”
“But I’m not an Immortalle, right?” I questioned, still confused.
“Not as far as I know. It would be a miracle if you were, though.”
“And what’s the difference between the two?”
“They’re basically the same. Or used to be until their Immortalle gifts died out.”
“Oh.” I wasn’t sure what to say after that. Much of this was still so unbelievable. I needed time to digest this bit of information.
“I promised you another movie and you should be resting, anyway. Not up and about. Go. Find something good, and I’ll clean up. We’ll talk later.”
“Party pooper.” I laughed and handed him my empty bowl. I’d eaten every drop. “Just when it was getting good.” He was right, though. I was tired.
“Careful now, that’ll earn you another swat on the butt,” he teased.
“You wouldn’t!” I faked outrage but failed in my sincerity when I couldn’t deny the grin creeping across my face. Arkkadian was thinking the same thing I was—my lust-filled reaction to his hand on my backside. It was written all over his face as I slowly approached him.
“I would.” His smoldering gaze lit my insides on fire, and heat pooled low in my center.
“I dare you,” I teased breathlessly, staring up at him as I splayed my fingers across his belly and licked my lips.
Wait. No. Where did that come from? What was I thinking? I wasn’t bold, and this was bold. I tugged on the collar of my shirt as if doing so would release the steam building up in my engine.
“You’re playing with fire, Aislin.” His voice was so deep. So sultry. And very, very intense. I watched as his tongue snaked across his bottom lip, and then my gaze wandered up to his eyes. They were glowing bright blue, but instead of fear, my insides burned with desire as I looked upon those two cerulean orbs staring right back into my soul.
Suddenly, I wanted to devour him.
My heart pounded in my chest and the heat rising in my core snaked its way throughout my body. I was lost in the moment until Arkkadian broke the stare. I shook myself with a huff. Reality beckoned once again, the s
exual tension broken.
With that, he turned me toward the den, swatted my butt, and sent me back to the couch to rest. “Park it. Doctor’s orders.”
“Y… yes, sir,” I stammered, giving him a bit of side-eye and a grin. I couldn’t help myself. I giggled as walked out of the room. Good heavens! What had come over me just now?
20
Arkkadian
That little vixen! I watched my mate’s sassy little backside as she sauntered out of the kitchen. My dick was instantly hard. Again. Like that was a surprise. I’d spent the last several days in a near constant state of arousal, giving the term blue balls a whole new meaning. I needed to take care of this or I’d be spending the next few hours in agony.
Poking my head into the den, I apologized and told Aislin I needed to return a quick phone call and excused myself upstairs, leaving her to pick another movie. I locked my bedroom door behind me and padded barefoot to the bathroom, also locking that door behind me.
My wolf needed a hard and fast release, and I couldn’t unzip my pants fast enough. I yanked them down and let them fall around my ankles. Planting one hand on the edge of the counter to brace myself, I wrapped my fingers around my hard length with the other.
I quickly stroked up and down, not wasting any time. I imagined walking right up to my mate, pulling her up off the couch, and delving my tongue into her delectable mouth as I wrapped my hands in her hair. I thought about how I wanted to tear her shirt off and suckle at her breasts before laying her back on my desk so I could have my way with her.
As the imaginary images flashed through my mind, I squeezed and stroked faster. Harder. Slapping sounds echoed through the bathroom as I jacked my hand up and down in a hurried frenzy, seeking the warm rush of pleasure that would be my reward.
In my mind, Aislin lay before me on the desk, knees bent, her bare feet resting on the edge. I leaned forward and kissed her belly, slowly inching my way down to that sweet spot at the apex of her luscious thighs. Thighs I wanted wrapped around my head. I could almost hear her gasp as my tongue swirled around and around her clitoris, making her writhe and moan. I imagined probing into her wetness, tasting every single drop and letting the magic flow over my tongue.
I stroked harder and faster, wanting to taste her so badly. I was almost tempted to go find her. Almost. A tingling began in my balls, and they tightened. Lightning-quick sparks of electric ecstasy shot up my spine, and flashes of light danced in my vision as my body jerked. I clenched my mouth shut in an effort not to howl, and I nearly collapsed to my knees, panting hard, as my orgasm spread through me like liquid fire.
I desperately wanted to show my mate just what her “sir” could really do. Maybe I’d spank her again later for that bit of sass. My beast sated, at least for now, I tucked myself back into my pants and joined her downstairs.
21
Aislin
After Arkkadian left to go make his phone call, I curled up on the sofa with the remote and flipped through the channels one more time. By the time he appeared in the doorway, I still hadn’t found anything interesting, but my headache was barely a blip on my radar. He carried a glass of water and set it down next to me.
“Thank you.”
“Find anything?”
“Nope.” I sighed. “Nothing that sounds good. Maybe you can find something.”
I handed him the remote when he sat down next to me. I sidled up beside him, and he wrapped his arm around me. As we sat there quietly flipping channels, I realized I truly enjoyed his presence and quiet strength. I finally trusted Arkkadian, that trust pouring forth like a fountain. The dam I’d built to protect my heart was finally crumbling.
When I looked up and smiled at the realization, he pulled me onto his lap, almost as if he knew exactly what I was thinking. His arms cocooned me, and I leaned into him, resting my head on his chest and relaxing into him. Safe. The thought disappeared just as suddenly as it had appeared, and unfortunately, the feeling didn’t last long.
Minutes passed in silence as we watched whatever movie he had finally picked out. I had been too distracted cuddling up to this beautiful man to even notice. I listened to the slow and steady beat of his heart. Ba-dum. Ba-dum. Ba-dum. Before long, my breathing matched his breath for breath, and our hearts synced together in perfect rhythm. When Arkkadian reached a hand up and rubbed my back, an overwhelming sense of ken zipped through me with a shock.
The intimacy was suddenly too much. I knew it was our souls recognizing one another. It should have been comforting, but the sound of Kane’s dark laughter echoed in my head instead, tormenting me and filling my mind with terrible things, like the memory of his hands all over me. Or the feel of his body on top of mine. His hot, stale breath making my skin crawl.
I jerked upright out of Arkkadian’s lap and crossed the room. My whole body felt squirmy, as if a million little ants were tunneling just below the surface. I tensed, hunching my shoulders around my neck. My skin itched everywhere, and I wanted to scratch it all off. Tear at it and suck all the little six-legged creepies out. Breathing hard and fast, I spun in circles around the room, and my vision swam. I raked both hands through my hair, pulling at it in fistfuls. I couldn’t breathe. All the oxygen in the room taunted me. Called my name. But I couldn’t pull it into my lungs no matter how much I struggled.
One flashback was all it took to destroy a beautiful moment. No, not just the moment. Everything. In an instant, I was the frightened woman I’d been that night. I was the traumatized and terrified little girl in that hospital waiting room. Anyone else I tried to be was just a façade. A fraud. I hadn’t moved on. That person was just an imposter teasing me, living in my skin, filling my head with the idea that I could be a normal person. No, I was a fragile little flower wilting at the first sign of drought.
“No. No, no, no, no.”
“Aislin?” Arkkadian stood, but wisely didn’t come any closer. “Aislin, what’s wrong?”
“I…” The walls closed in around me. I couldn’t speak. I couldn’t think. Run, my brain screamed.
I spun toward the door and bolted from the room. Yanking the front door of the cabin open, I took off barefoot down the gravel path. I ignored Arkkadian’s worried shouts behind me. I didn’t stop running until I collapsed on the big open lawn in front of the strange wooden platform, my body giving out as outright fear and loathing—the demons that possessed me—took over my body.
I crashed to my knees, gulping air like my life depended on it, hands fisting the soft grass. I choked on sobs that wracked my body. Twilight enveloped me as fireflies flitted inches from my face, but I was too frantic to take in the serenity surrounding me. I swatted at the tiny little lights floating in the air, slapping them away, hating the beauty they represented. The beauty I was not and would never be. At that moment, it was all so ugly. The grass. The sky. The air. Life. But I—I was the ugliest thing of all. I was a weak thing. A pathetic thing.
Like brittle glass under the stress of thermal shock, I shattered into a million tiny pieces.
Footsteps sounded on the gravel behind me, and I bowed my head in shame. Hot tears trailed down my face, leaving little salty paths in their wake. All these months later and I still felt so ugly. Dirty. Ashamed. And I’d just ruined a wonderful moment with Arkkadian. Completely. What a fool. How could anyone want a sniveling disaster like me? Because that’s what I was. A walking, talking disaster. I shrunk in on myself as if doing so would somehow make me invisible.
“Aislin?” The higher pitch of Arkkadian’s voice revealed his concern. I couldn’t answer him. I didn’t want his concern. I didn’t deserve it. I felt his presence behind me just before his gentle hands covered my arms, and I jerked away.
“Don’t. Don’t touch me,” I cried, my body trembling with deep-seated anguish. I never hated myself as much as I did in this moment.
I couldn’t bear to have anyone touching me right now. Arkkadian circled around and knelt down in front of me, but I scrambled backward, putting some distanc
e between us. Uncontrollable tears dropped onto the blades of green beneath me. Hot, angry tears. Ugly tears. Sad tears. Tears of torment and weakness. Tear for all the things I had lost and would never get back. Tears for all the things I was not and would never be.
“Aislin, what happened? Tell me what’s wrong.” He spoke barely above a whisper. I still couldn’t find my words, and the silent void between us expanded until it drowned out the world.
“Come on, talk to me, love,” he soothed but he didn’t move closer, and I blessed him for it. The sad light in his eyes echoed the anguish in my tight chest. Had I hurt him? Or was it the link between us that allowed him to feel all of my hurt? Guilt filled me. It was too much. Way too much. I couldn't do this.
“Please. Just go. I need a few moments.” I barely choked out the words as I waited for his rejection. How could he still want me like this?
“I’m not going anywhere. We’ll sit here as long as you need.”
I tried to stand and put more distance between us, but I stumbled, hissing at the stinging pain in my feet. They felt like I’d stepped on shards of broken glass. Arkkadian caught me, and I struggled in his arms, but he refused to let me go. His refusal shattered something in me, and the last vestiges of the dam I’d built finally and entirely collapsed. Instead of rejection, Arkkadian shrouded me in patient strength and gently lowered us back to the ground. He just held me close while I shed every tear I could. He held me after the tears stopped. He held me until the last shudder shook me, and I finally fell silent.
“Dear God, what happened to you?” Arkkadian spoke softly into the air. It wasn’t a question for me. It was a question for the fates. It was a question spoken by a man so consumed with emotion, he felt every ounce of my heartache. He felt rage. Grief. Remorse. Determination.
