by D. M. Burns
It’s the most beautiful princess cut diamond I’ve ever laid eyes on. It’s huge and sparkles out like a disco ball with zero movements. Centered around the stone is a white platinum gold band that has a uniquely scripted design outlining it. Brogan spared no expense on this promise of forever with me. Much like him, it’s beautiful in every way.
Once Tamera and Channing finally went to their separate corners, I followed behind her to make sure she was okay. I’ve never seen my best friend that upset and when I tried to question her, she played it off. Of course, she saw the ring before I could dive in and tell her. It’s an eye-catching left-handed statement that really doesn’t wait for me to announce our engagement.
We bounced up and down while hugging it out then facetimed Max so he wouldn’t feel left out. Max was already down and out because he couldn’t get anyone to fill in for him at the hospital so he could come to Greece. I sure didn’t want him to feel left out about something as huge as my engagement.
Rehashing the details for them less the artistic talents that flow generously through Brogan’s body was easy. It’s something I’ll never forget. They both went on excitedly over never having to work again, them-not me.
Honestly, if I had the kind of money Brogan has, I’d take care of my ride and die handpicked fam-clan. Unfortunately, I had to break it to them that I was broke, something they're both aware of. That reminder had both of my BFF’s going silent for two seconds before they started in about marrying into money. I shut that down quickly with a pointed look. They cut it off but I’m sure both of them will tag team me later on the subject. Discussing Brogan’s wealth makes me uncomfortable and I’m not going there.
I swing my feet back and forth mindlessly in the pool while watching the disoriented reflection of the moon ripple about from my commotion. I’ve disturbed the beautiful mirrored background that it presented me with. I know exactly what that feels like too.
My colorful picture-perfect background was spray painted black today with absolute reassurance that a new canvas will never be an option. Or at least that’s how I’ve felt ever since Brogan exiled the concept of children from our future. I can’t seem to shake it.
The idea that I grew up with and hoped for as far as having a big family was laid to rest today. How can the happiest day of my life end in feeling like a huge loss? It was like the door was opened to all my heart's desires and wants only to have it slammed on my hand. Fracturing the family picture, I had framed inside my mind and soul.
I’ll never get to pick out nursery colors or baby furniture. There will be no need to ponder on baby names or contemplate a future gender reveal party. No late-night cuddling rocking chair sessions to come. The thought of never getting to see Brogan hold our baby is a depressing heartbreak within itself.
Our future family holidays, our special family trips, and our first of everything childlike related, will never come to pass. It’ll be only Brogan and me. I’ll never be a mother. Brogan will never be a father. I rub my hand over my head feeling an overwhelming headache coming on.
Am I enough for you, butterfly?
Brogan’s question keeps rolling over in my mind and I can’t help but wonder if I answered him honestly. Of course, he’s everything that I want now, but I long for that family down the road. I planned that out in detail inside my mind way before I ever met Brogan. After finally having him, my want to have children down the road morphed into a life goal. Knowing that’s not a possibility or something that he wants, cuts deep. I know he’s enough, right? I just need time to adjust to this, that’s all.
Letting my head fall back, I take in the well-lit moon above. It looks like a newly changed out lightbulb beaming down silently chastising me for not being more appreciative. Or maybe that’s just my guilty conscious. Brogan is enough, always. Loving him isn’t a choice for me because there is no other. I’ll get over the stipulations of a childless life with time but I know in my soul that I’d never get over not having him, period.
I couldn’t sleep and didn’t want to wake Brogan. Wandering around that mansion came to an end and I found myself out here at the pool. This place is similar to a tropical resort with the green thumb etched in the care of all the flowers and rolling moss thriving around me. The soft glow of beautiful landscaping lights perfectly placed illuminates the decorated beauty all around me.
As I watch the twinkling stars sending winks my way from up above, I wonder if my parents are watching me from up above. And if so, I hope they’re proud of me. I called my grandparents earlier and told them about Brogan’s proposal. They’re so happy and I promised them both that I’d visit soon.
My gramps told me to bring “the boy” with me because he wants to meet the man responsible for my happiness just in case he screws up. My smile grows with that thought. My gramps is the type of man who’d have no problem saying that to Brogan’s face.
“What are you doing out here, sunshine?” Channing asks. He plops down beside me and dunks his feet in the water then wraps his beefy arm around my shoulder.
“Nothing…” I turn to see that his hair is slightly wet as if he just got out of a shower. “It’s past two in the morning. Did you just get out of the shower?”
“Yelp. I got in a workout. After roaming this ridiculous ass place, I got lost but found a damn gym in the lower level. So, I burned some hatred for your BFF off.” He chuckles and swipes at his five-o’clock shadow.
“Tamera is a wonderful soul. You just rub her the wrong way, that’s all.” I say.
“No, wrong… That crazy lady needs rubbed in the right way, period.” He wiggles his eyebrows at me and I giggle.
“You know, Channing, there are things that I can’t share with you about Tam because her truths are for her to tell, but she has her reasons for being hard and closed off. But I’ll tell you this, she feels deeply, and loves fiercely once she claims you as family.”
“You don’t worry about that. We’ll work it out, I’m sure. It wouldn’t hurt for you to put in a good word for me though.” He gives me a wink.
“You like her…” I smile wide and he chuckles.
“Maybe.” He says.
“I can do that as long as when we get back home, you make the effort to get to know your brother better.”
“Jesus, sunshine… You’re not going to let that go, are you?” He smirks at me. “I’ll see what I can do, yeah?” I’ll take that small victory.
“Mkay… Uhm, I know your little secret…” I say and Channing turns to me. The look on his face is confusion mixed with some comedic value. He arches his brow at me.
“Is that so? Well, it was never a secret that I love the sunshine.” He laughs and I push at his arm playfully.
“Well, uhm… What I meant was that I know you can do special things. Brogan told me that you guys are Lone Walker’s. He gave me the basic info, but he left out the details about you. Care to share?” He shrugs his shoulders and looks out over the pool as if he’s contemplating my question.
“Shit, sunshine… I can dive into your past memories, catch glimpses of the future, and I dabble a little with fire from time to time. If shit gets outta control with the fire thing then I can manipulate the weather for some rain.” He chuckles like it’s not a big deal.
Channing spins his finger effortlessly and my eyes bug out as the water in the pool start to swirl. It starts out in a slow pattern then he flicks his finger out in front of him and my name, Sunshine, is in big cursive sloshing but spiraling letters in front of my face. Then he motions his hand and I blink at the change up scene in front of me. It’s a sculpted watered-down version of me and Channing sitting in a booth across from each other at the Cupcake Café with a large cupcake between us.
“Ahhhh, and you say my mind is a mystical place.” I whisper. I’m in awe at this display. These men are beyond words.
“More like a mystery place because I’m still trying to figure out why you pick the underdeveloped and grumpier brother.” He chuckles.
“Y
ou’re so special, Channing.” My voice is awestruck.
When he flips his finger again, a large swirling aquamarine sun forms with a heart in the center. My oversized grizzly has a mushy soul. Then he lightly claps his hands together and the water bursts out into multiple aqua blue butterflies just before pouring back into the kidney shaped bed of water.
“Wow… That’s so cool.” I turn to him and swat his arm. He flinches back while rubbing at his arm as if my little slap hurt him. “So, you knew all of this was going to happen and didn’t tell me… Rude.” I pout.
“That’s the thing about you, little one. My talents don’t mean shit when it comes to you. You being the little rebel and going out on your own changes shit up. Hell, you were supposed to be my wife, not the Wallstreet dicks.” He chuckles.
“Holy crap…” My eyes widen in surprise. So many things are starting to make sense with Channing now. I feel bad, but he’s got to know that I belong with Brogan. “God only makes you wait because he has so much more in store for you than you can possibly imagine, Channing. Love unlike anything you’ve ever experienced will show up when you least expect it.” I lay my head against his arm and he pats my cheek.
“Yeah, I guess so.” He grunts out.
“What do you see for Brogan and me?” I’m not even going to lie; I’m fishing for that happily-ever-after family thing. He remains silent for longer than necessary and I look up at him.
“For the first time in my life, sunshine… I don’t have a damn clue.” He lets out a long sigh and my heart deflates.
“That’s depressing. My clock must need to be repaired or something, yeah?” I ask on a giggle.
“Hell, no. Even my special attributes can’t touch your elevated status, sunshine. It simply means that you’re extraordinary and one of a kind, period.” He winks at me and those silver eyes seem to be smiling. He’s trying to pacify me.
“Do you guys understand how unique you both are? Together, united; you two would be unstoppable.”
“Listen you, little matchmaker, calm the F down with all that. We’re working on it, yeah?” He shakes his head at me and I shrug. “You’re an amazing lady, Brea. Brogan’s one lucky undeserving little son-of-a-bitch. Now, let me see the ring that asshole put on this beautiful hand.” Channing reaches for my hand and inspects the forever purchase turning my hand at every angle. “Don’t tell that dick I said this, but he did you right with this purchase.” Channing smiles at me which makes me return the favor.
“Did he tell you about proposing?” I ask.
“Sorta… He told me that he planned to steal you away from me before leaving for Greece.” I’m shocked that Brogan would confide in Channing but I’m freaking elated that my plan is slowly taking shape. They need each other. “Figured you’d be a little more excited though.”
“I really am… Uhm, well, it’s just that he doesn’t want kids. It’s a shock, but I get it.” I look up at him and I see his silver slits focus in on me.
“Gotta be honest with you, I think that’s for the best considering the high profile and fast-paced lifestyle he leads. Hell, I made sure that I never have that problem either.”
“What?” My brows pull together in confusion as I continue to stare at my overgrown grizzly.
“I got neutered long ago. No kids for me.” He shakes his head slowly no.
“What is wrong with you two men?” I ask in exasperation.
“Think about it, Brea… He works like a demon fueled by hate and the media is after his ass 24-7. Let’s not forget about our secret DNA traits. It tends to be a little tricky for a newborn. It’s understandable.” He nods his head and I look back out across the pool. I never really thought about it like that. “I still think you picked the wrong brother though, but I’m happy for you.” He bumps into my shoulder again and I wrap my arms around his beefy existence.
“I love you, you overgrown grizzly bear.” I pull him down and kiss his cheek.
“Hey, just because that asshole put a ring on it doesn’t mean that you can’t change your mind though. And no matter what, I’ll always be here for you, yeah?” I nod my head.
“That’s heartwarming, you prick, but unnecessary.” That voice is a low warning. “Get your damn hands off my fiancé,” Brogan growls.
I look behind me to see him shirtless, but his lower half is covered by a pair of black baggy sleep pants. Brogan’s outline illuminates from the mansion's lighting behind him. He looks relaxed leaned against the large rock column. Channing raises his free hand flipping him the bird then tugs me closer into his side.
“You sure you want to wake up to that grouchy asshole every day for the rest of your life?” Channing grins at me and I laugh while shaking my head yes. “Well, I’m glad you’re full of smiles and sunshine then because Mr. No Personality is one helluva wrist slitting Donny Downer.”
Brogan comes up behind Channing and goes to toss him in, but Channing moves so fast that even I fail to gage his actions. Lighting quick, Channing locks his arms around Brogan’s frame, and like a massive linebacker on steroids, he rams forward into the pool at the last moment. They both create a huge splash upon impact bounding up out of the water trying to outmaneuver one another. I giggle at the spectacle of these two finally acting like the brothers they truly are for once.
“You’re not the alpha here, you asshole.” Channing laughs out loud as he tries to manhandle Brogan but ends up slam-dunked under the water.
“We both know better, you prick.” Brogan stands and shoves him out of the way then runs his hands over his face continuing the motion through his jet-black hair. Channing chuckles as he leisurely backstrokes through the water.
I snag my phone up and press record thinking this brotherly bonding display will be a great memory to look back on. But before I have a chance to hit record, Brogan jerks the phone out of my hand tossing it to the side then plucks me up submerging me under the water too. My nightgown clings to my body as we surface. Brogan’s smile is so carefree and contagious. It’s something that I’m getting used to. I smooth my hand over his jawline continuing the motion through his white streak.
“That was uncalled for, honey,” I whisper. He didn’t think this through because the pink silky material was fine dry but it doesn’t conceal my boobs at all now that it’s drenched.
“Don’t worry, Southern Comfort… He’s not going to see any part of this body.” Brogan wraps his arms around me and smiles wide then looks over his shoulder. Channing makes his way over to the stairs and climbs out leaving us behind.
“I’m going to go raid all the kitchen’s in this place. Too bad all the damn cupcakes are a total loss.” Channing grabs one of the towels off a patio table in passing then wraps it around his waist.
“You’ll probably prefer the gym kitchen. The staff stocks that one with protein shakes and bodybuilding shit you’d prefer.” Brogan mumbles.
“Appreciate it. Congrats on the pending nuptials to that asshole.” Channing points at Brogan and winks at me. Brogan flips him off while slowly wading us through the water as Channing moves for the house.
“You couldn’t sleep, huh?” Brogan says. It’s not a question, really. He knows I couldn’t.
“Why are you up?” I ask. He tilts his head to the side and smirks. I know it’s a crazy question.
Brogan hardly ever sleeps but he was sleeping peacefully when I strayed out here. Truth be known, he’s normally tucked away in a corner watching me sleep while sipping on Southern Comfort or crunching numbers for a Wall Street worthy investment.
“You weren’t with me.” He levels me with those ice barriers. “I could just take those thoughts without permission.”
“Please don’t.” I shake my head while running my fingers through his hair and he leans into my touch.
“Well, tell me this then… Do you love me, Brealyn?”
“Always…” I smile wide.
“That’s all I need to know.” Instead of my thoughts, he steals my next breath with a consuming kiss
that I melt into.
chapter 22
Brogan
The sun is trying to peek through the dark clouds manifesting in the background. It promises bad weather with fast approaching follow through. It’s slipping in on us and looks like it holds a nasty bite. I sip my coffee and eyeball the asshole brother out near the cliffs.
Envisioning a helping shove over is an evil thought, but my mind’s playground has never been PG rated anyway especially not where he’s concerned. I still feel a certain type of way about him. He’s slowly growing on me though, somewhat comparable to fungus or mold.
Channing’s like a flared-up hemorrhoid that once you make the grave mistake of scratching at it the damn thing leaves a burning sensation felt for hours afterward. He has his moments, I guess. Notably, when him and Tamera go at it. Just a couple of nights ago, I grab a bowl of popcorn, settled down in the nearest chair, and took in the show.
Tamera got his ass back for the pool stunt by wiring his bedroom door up. It was quite ingenious on her behalf though. As soon as his oversized ass rolled out of bed and opened the door stepping out, a bucket of oatmeal, milk, and honey tipped over coating his massive ass in a thick sticky film, priceless shit.
It gets better… Tamera flipped the switch on one of the industrial fans she moved in from the barn releasing a shit ton of features that one of my expensive pillows took a sacrificial knifing death for. Let me tell you something, it was fucking worth every feather that stuck to his asshole body. He looked like Colonel Sanders just gave birth to one large Perdue chicken.
In all seriousness, I was waiting for his fuck sockets to light up into flame throwers and dust the chick in the middle of my grand hallway. Of course, I was recording the entire shitshow on my phone for future comedic value. Three words sum this shit up in a nutshell…
Best.
Vacation.
Ever.
