They started toward them. The sun was warm and in the shelter of the wall the spring breezes didn’t touch them. “What I meant with my comment about my family is that these first months as duke, my families’ strained relationship. It will be difficult.”
She nodded. “I understand.”
“Does the prospect frighten you?”
She shook her head. “No. I’ve been through great challenges in my life already. I understand, and I’ll do my best to support you.”
He stopped, appreciation making him draw her closer. “Chloe. You’re so perfect. I don’t deserve—”
She shook her head. “I should be thanking you. I’ve been by myself for so long. Suddenly, I don’t have to face the future alone.”
And she raised up on tiptoe, her lips pressing to his.
It was all the invitation he needed. Wrapping her in his arms, he kissed her again. He should explain more. About how he’d shut down his feelings for so long, he wasn’t sure he could give again.
But knowing she wanted this intimacy, too, that he’d give her enough to keep her at his side, he stayed silent and kissed her instead.
This was what he wanted. Her pressed to him; her body fitted to his.
Lifting her off the ground, he continued to kiss her as he carried her toward the grove of trees.
Inside, they had an entire house to find a private corner but as they slipped into the trees, here felt so right. Birds chirped and gulls called, the distant sound of the ocean, creating a beautiful backdrop. And as he stepped onto the mossy ground, his boots sinking into its soft depths, he knew he wanted to claim Chloe as his own. She’d said the words, but words had never been reliable. At least not for him.
But her body. That was real and tangible and as he sank to the ground, pulling her into his lap.
Her chest pressed to his and as he continued to kiss her, his fingers began working the buttons at the back of her dress.
She brushed her fingers at his collar, then dipped them down under his cravat and he let go of her buttons to undo the knot. He wanted her hands on his skin. Soft and so sweet, her fingers glided along his skin.
He started working her buttons again. “Chloe,” he said between kisses. “I need you.”
She kissed him again, her lips yielding under his. “I need you, too.”
He knew that she did. He’d always known that Chloe needed him, or at least some man to come in and care for her. And he knew he’d win her affection by giving her what her heart desired. Security, if not love. “I’m glad.” He managed to finish the row of buttons and he tugged her bodice down revealing her chemise and corset. “But, I meant, I need to touch you. I’ve never wanted anyone the way I want you.”
She sighed into his mouth, her fingers threading into his hair. “I want you, too.”
Thank the bloody Lord above.
Then he paused. Had he just prayed? Did it count if he also used a blasphemous word in the middle? Whatever his fears for what he might not be able to give Chloe, he was grateful to the powers that be that she’d landed in his arms.
Pushing the chemise out of the way, one of her breasts came into view, perfect and round, just big enough to fill a man’s hand with a pale pink nipple that made him ache.
He kissed a trail down her neck even as he cupped the breast in his hand, his thumb coming to brush the silky peak. It puckered under his touch and her neck arched back, giving him even better access to her flesh.
He groaned as he kissed down her chest, her creamy skin as smooth as it was sweet. And when his mouth brushed over her nipple, she cried out, her fingers digging into the skin of his scalp.
It was beautiful and glorious and this, even more than her consent to his proposal, made him certain he’d made the right decision.
Chloe was meant to be his.
Chapter Twelve
Ben’s lips scorched along her skin, a delicious fire licking at her insides. She’d never imagined this sort of passion could be hers, and she couldn’t get enough.
This man. This beautiful, strong man would be hers. Her husband, her lover, her forever.
That wasn’t to say he didn’t need her help.
He most certainly did.
And now that she knew this was her future, she’d give him everything she had. Her breath caught as he sucked her nipple into his mouth.
There was more to it than a simple exchange, however. Because even before he’d asked for her hand, she’d been having a difficult time resisting him, his pull. With startling clarity, she realized that she’d fallen in love with him.
She cried out, tugging at his hair. “Ben.”
“Too hard, love?” he asked, his lips kissing up her chest once again.
“No.” She shook her head. “It’s just…”
“Is this too fast?” he asked, and his lips softly pressed to hers again with a sweetness that stole her breath. “I’m sorry. Now that I’ve asked you to be my wife, I’m having a difficult time being patient.” His arms wrapped about her. “But we can wait. Even if this…” his fingers trailed down her back. “This was what I’d longed for.”
“What was it you wanted?” she asked as his lips captured hers again.
He smiled against her mouth. “It turns out, to be close to you. This intimacy.”
She sighed into his mouth. She’d wished for this, too. To be against him, touching him was heaven. She wanted more of this closeness. “When will we wed?”
He chuckled then. “You’re right, of course. We should wait until we’ve married. I’ll have the banns posted this Sunday so a fortnight from then.”
She paused. That wasn’t exactly what she’d meant, but she didn’t reply as his hand slid up to cup her other breast. That delicious heat that had been licking at her insides curled in her belly once again.
But rather than take her other nipple in his mouth, he started to pull her bodice back into place.
Disappointment made her curl deeper into him. “I’m not certain I want to leave the garden.”
“Me either,” he said smiling at her. “But we can’t stay if you’re to remain chaste.”
She nodded. Had she decided that? She wasn’t certain but neither did she wish to rush. This had been so wonderful, and the less they did during this interlude, the more she’d discover the next.
Which was exactly what happened.
Over the course of the next three days, they found all sorts of cozy corners to kiss, squeeze, touch, until Chloe thought she might burst from the wanting. Her head was in a perpetual fog, and when Millie found her in the music room, aimlessly plucking at keys, she openly laughed.
“You’re nearly as pathetic looking as my brother,” Millie said as she entered the room.
Chloe broke into an ominous chord, laughing as she did. “I’m glad. I’d hate to be pathetic alone.”
Millie smiled softly. “You have an affection for one another.”
Chloe looked at the keys. She had an affection for him. She didn’t know how he felt about her. Yes, he wanted her and certainly he thought her skilled enough to be a duchess, but beyond that… “Can you believe we’ll be sisters?”
Millie beamed, her hands coming together, clapping a few times. “It’s wonderful news.” Then her lips pulled down. “But it’s not the only news of the day. In fact, there is quite a bit more.”
Chloe’s eyes widened. “What’s happened?”
Millie slipped onto the settee, her arms wrapping about her middle. “Justice and Sayden…they’re coming. Here.”
Chloe pushed up from the bench, joining Millie on the couch. “Oh, dear.”
“I want to see them, of course,” Millie said, lacing her fingers through Chloe’s. “Though I confess, I’m glad you’re marrying Ben. Otherwise, I might have worried about you meeting them.”
“I’m sure I would have been fine but thank you.” She squeezed Millie’s fingers. “Try not to worry. Both Dez and Ben will make certain they behave.”
Millie gave a shake
of her head, a humorless chuckle falling from her lips. “No one controls a White who doesn’t wish to be. Not even my father could manage it, and we all know what sort of will he had. He simply passed that will onto his sons.”
Chloe didn’t reply.
She believed Millie’s words and that was part of the problem. While the past few days had been glowingly happy, she remembered the Ben she’d first met. Would he continue to be so kind and caring, or would he return to the hard man who’d first entered the finishing school and fired her immediately? Her stomach fluttered as she thought about that day.
Millie looked down at her lap. “There’s more.”
“More?” Chloe frowned. What was troubling her beyond her two wild brothers coming to stay? “What is it?”
“A letter arrived this morning from Lord Lambford.”
“Lord Lambford?” Chloe dropped Millie’s hand. Her fingers fluttered up chest. “He’s writing after that disastrous dinner?”
“He is.” Millie wrinkled her nose, her eyes closing. “It gets worse. He’s interested in pursuing a match. He’s returning here tonight to discuss the possibility with Ben.”
“A match?” Chloe cried. Then she flattened her hand on her fluttering heartbeat, looking at Millie. “Are you interested in a match with him?”
Millie shrugged. “No, not really. Although, I must face the possibility that, thanks to my shy nature, I may not get another offer.”
Chloe stood, beginning to pace. It bothered her to think of Millie, beautiful and wonderful Millie, settling in this way. “Of course you will. I’m going to help you and—”
“Chloe,” Millie interrupted. “You’re not going to London to help me. You’re staying with Ben, remember?”
Chloe gasped. Her hands flying to cover her mouth. “We’ll delay the wedding.”
Millie stepped closer. “You will not. This is your chance, and you need to take it.”
“But…” she started, trying to articulate why she could not allow Millie to marry Lambford. “He’s all wrong for you.”
Millie shrugged. “Ben thinks I should accept.”
Chloe’s mouth opened and then she closed it again. She needed to discuss Millie’s situation with Ben. Right now.
Ben dismounted from his horse, feeling perfectly spent. He’d ridden all morning, exploring the grounds, seeing them with fresh eyes. From the beaches to the forest he’d travelled forgotten paths, remembering his childhood. His mother. The way her kindness had infused her every action.
He loved this place.
Turning his steed over to the groom, he started for the house. He had a mountain of ledgers to review and even more correspondence to respond to, but all that fell away as he saw Chloe walking toward him.
He warmed just seeing her, knowing how she’d fit in his arms.
The wind pulled at her skirts, pieces of her hair dancing in the breeze. He grinned to see her and increasing his pace, he met her halfway down the path, picking her up and swinging her about.
Her hands came to his shoulders, her body pressed close to his. He kissed her and she returned the touch, but there was a coolness that hadn’t been there yesterday. She held back, her body stiffer, her lips more reserved. “Chloe?” He looked at her, trying to discern her shuddered expression. “What’s wrong?”
“I just spoke with Millie.” She pushed back a little, frowning at him. “Did you really encourage Millie to accept Lord Lambford’s suit?”
He set her down, confusion making him shake his head. “Of course, I did.”
“Why?” she cried, pushing on his chest.
“Why not?” he asked, his brow scrunching together. “He’s titled, well off, and smitten.” To him, the pairing was an obvious and easy choice.
Chloe huffed a breath, pushing away from him. “Millie is beautiful and the sister of a duke. She can have any man she wishes. With all due respect, Lord Lambford is a perfectly nice man but…” Her lips pursed as she searched for the words.
“But what?” he asked, crossing his arms as he glared down at her. He didn’t appreciate her questioning his judgment.
“But.” Her hands came to her hips. “He’s not the right man for her.”
“You mean he isn’t attractive enough.”
“I mean.” She poked his chest. “That Millie deserves a chance to find what we have.”
That made him relax. Her acknowledgement of their attraction put him at ease. He placed a hand at her waist. “You’re so kind to consider that, but not everyone has that sort of choice.”
She did not allow him to pull her close. “I’m not talking about everyone. I’m just talking about Millie. Your sister.”
He sighed out a breath. “Let’s not pretend every option is open to her. She refused to speak a word at dinner with Lambford and Tyron. That sort of debilitation—”
“Can be overcome,” Chloe interrupted.
“Maybe. With time.”
Chloe’s brows knitted together. “Then we give her time. She’s yet to even have a season.”
His mouth pressed into a hard line as he looked down at her. “I would love to give her all the time in the world but I’ve a dukedom to learn to run. I can’t spend all my time in London—”
“I know that,” Chloe answered, her shoulders drooping. “But I can help her.”
His hand dropped from her waist. “Absolutely not.”
“Why not?”
He drew in a breath. Waiting a few weeks was one thing. But being apart for months or years? It was unacceptable. “You’ll be needed here, or wherever I am.”
“I won’t be gone forever. I simply want to help her find a more suitable match.”
“No.” The single word fell between them like a stone. Was he being selfish? He wasn’t certain. But over the past few days, wounds that had festered for years had begun to heal. He couldn’t be without her.
Chloe’s jaw hardened. He’d never seen her look like that before. “No?”
“No.”
Chloe took a step back. “I see.”
He started forward, sensing that something had shifted between them. “Chloe, try to understand.”
“I think I understand perfectly.”
He scrubbed a hand through his mussed hair. “Millie will be fine. Lord Lambford is a good man who—”
“Is all wrong for her.” Chloe inhaled deeply, even as tears sparkled in her eyes. “I want what is best for you, Ben. And I’ll do anything to make you happy, but I can’t sacrifice Millie’s future. Not even for you. I won’t.”
“What does that mean?” he asked.
Her chin notched higher. “I have to do this. I have to help her make a better match.”
His jaw clenched, his teeth snapping together. “I am her guardian. You can’t finance a season without me.”
A tear slipped down her cheek as she looked at him, studying his face. “You would deny her that chance?”
He realized the folly of his words as he watched her face crumple before him, her shoulders curling in. “Chloe, I need—”
“I need to think.” Another tear slid down her cheek.
“About what?”
“How can you be so cold to your own sister?”
He staggered back, her words hitting their mark. “Chloe.”
“And how will you treat me when the passion has cooled? I have to confess that I wished for the protection of marriage.” She drew in an unsteady breath. “But not if you don’t have my best interests at heart. I don’t need you to love—” Her hands came to her mouth. “But I need some sort of security.” Then she spun around and ran for the house, skirts flying behind her.
He watched her go, knowing every word was correct. He’d been a selfish cad. He’d put his needs before hers and before Millie’s.
He’d never felt closer to his father than he did in this moment, and he hated himself for it.
He scrubbed his face. Was that his real legacy? Being a selfish bastard exactly like his father? He had to find a way t
o change all that. Chloe was right. It wasn’t enough to just push people away.
He had to keep them close and act for their benefit not his own. That was how he used to be. How his mother had been. And inviting Lambford back had not been in Millie’s best interest, but his own. He could see that now and he’d have to decide how to undo that mistake. Because it was time, he became the man he was meant to be again.
Chapter Thirteen
Chloe dressed carefully for dinner, ignoring the pale hue of her face. She’d not hide this time. She did not relish seeing Ben at dinner. Not that she regretted her words. They’d needed to be said.
But conflict wasn’t generally her preference, and she’d have to face whatever repercussions her little speech incurred. Was he furious? Likely.
Did he regret his actions? Hope fluttered in her chest, but she quickly pushed it back down.
She rose from her chair at her vanity, then made her way down to dinner where most of the family had already gathered.
Silence had settled about the group, stilted and uncomfortable and all eyes turned to her as she entered. “Good evening.”
Millie rose crossing the room, a question sparkling in her eyes.
Ben scowled while Dez raised a brow.
It was Dez, not Ben, who cleared his throat. “You look lovely tonight.”
“Thank you,” she answered as Ben’s scowl deepened. She’d expected Lord Lambford to be here already and she looked to Millie, her own question rising to her lips. “Is this our entire party for the evening?”
Millie gave her head a bit of a shake. “No, but our guest has yet to arrive.”
Her lips drew into a tight line as she looked at Ben again. His gaze had hardened in response.
Linking her arm through Millie’s they returned to the settee. Esme smiled at them as the three women sat down together. “Wouldn’t two weddings in one month be wonderful?”
No one replied and Esme cleared her throat.
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