The reason he’d sighed when he came onboard was because he’d seen that Yue had isolated herself in a corner. She’d picked a location by the backdoor and was sitting facing the wall. She also looked like she’d hit the pill bottles he’d given her pretty hard. Despite the early hour she was slumped over in a chair looking like she didn’t plan on waking up any time soon. Jeff went and sat down at a chair next to her.
He jumped up and let out an involuntary yelp when Yue suddenly jerked her head upright to stare at him. Her eyes were wide open, but she didn’t really seem to be looking at him. She sat like that for a few seconds with her neck stuck way out staring straight at him. Gradually her face dipped back down, and she appeared to drift back off into dreamland. Jeff didn’t move until she seemed to really be asleep again. Once the coast was clear he got up and walked over to where LeBron, Drew and Lisa had all been looking over in his direction.
“That scary waking up thing is new.” Jeff said sitting down on the other end of the cot LeBron had claimed.
“Considering how many pills she took I’m surprised she can lift her head.” Harley said walking over and standing beside them. He’d spent a good part of the day helping out with clearing buildings. He’d missed a lot of the new tricks that Yue had developed. Jeff and the others quickly caught him up to speed.
Harley was comically horrified at the description of the infected boy walking out to be slaughtered. His mouth hung open for that entire part of the story. When Jeff was done telling it he let them all know what was going on with Yue and Tom wanting her to go to Weathertop. He told them they might be able to influence the decision if they thought it was better that Yue go back to Weathertop.
“Why wouldn’t we go back there? Massive walls and unlimited food. TV and video games. I say we push it that way. Maybe if Yue gets away from the crawlerz long enough she’ll snap back to being herself.” Lisa said.
Jeff let them know he was having a hard time with the decision because he knew he wasn’t welcome back to the base. He’d been as good as told that by the President himself so probably no way around it. If Yue went back, then there was a good chance he’d never see her again. He told them he was totally ok with that if it was going to save her sanity. He just wanted to get it out there so they could help him pick the option that was best for Yue. He didn’t trust himself to be impartial.
“So we need to make a decision about Yue’s future without letting her in on it. I get that she’s out cold and everything but if she ever finds out we did this she’ll still beat the crap out of us.” Drew said matter of factly. He wasn’t wrong. Yue wasn’t the type to let other people make her decisions for her.
“Honestly I don’t know that it’s going to matter anyway. For her to hone her skills she’s going to need to be out in the field or have infected people brought to her. No matter what we decide I think as soon as the people back at Weathertop understand that then they’re not going to want to touch her. They’ll want lots of updates and want to control her from afar, but I really doubt it’ll be more than that.” Jeff added to the hopelessness of them figuring out what they should do.
“Then why are you even asking us about this?” Lisa said pissed off. She’d made the connection as soon as Jeff explained why Yue wouldn’t be welcomed back to Weathertop. Drew had told her all about how the Ford had gone down because someone thought it’d be safe to import a couple of crawlerz for studying. She still felt like there was a little bit more to that story than Drew was letting on, but the basic premise was valid. If you want a place to stay safe, then don’t voluntarily invite the infection into it.
“I’m asking you guys because with Yue out of it there’s no one else I trust. If we word it just right maybe they’d still take her. Do you think I push it that way or do we just accept she’ll be more useful out in the field and write it up that way?” Jeff asked.
“If you can get someone you love into a safe place then why not do it? Weathertop may be one of the last places around where she can go and not pick up on the crawler vibes that’re tweaking her out. Right now her choices are to stay stoned or be gone.” Harley said. That pretty much summed it up no more how oddly worded.
“Thanks.” Jeff said. He knew what he had to do. He had to give her a chance to get her mind reset. A chance to go to a place that could function as a detox center for her brain. If she could get off-line from the crawler net for long enough maybe she could stay unplugged. The only way for them to have a future together may be to give her up now. Otherwise she might not have a future at all.
Chapter 16: Going a Little Cray Cray
Yue slept the whole night through. Jeff knew that because he stayed up most of the night watching her sleep. He found himself thankful for Harleys serious drug issues. If it wasn’t for their large friends recreational medicinal pursuits, they wouldn’t have known which drug cocktail was the best at blocking out the crawlerz. It was a really nice to have for most of them. It was a literal life saver for Yue.
The drug Jeff found himself most needing as the sun began working its way past the horizon was caffeine. The aroma of fresh coffee was the one thing that was able to pry him away from watching over Yue. It was also the only thing capable of pulling Yue out of that drug induced slumber she’d been in. Jeff was worried she’d wake up as freaked out as she’d gone to bed. There’d been multiple times she was afraid she’d hurt anyone who stood close to her. Jeff imagined it was similar to the people who’d jumped off roofs when hit by the mind waves thrown off by the crawlerz. Similar but a million times worse for someone as dialed in to the crawler frequency as Yue was.
“Can you get me a cup?” Yue asked shyly. Jeff did a bit of a doubletake. Yue wasn’t the type to ask him anything shyly. She must be extremely upset about the events of the day before. He hated that she’d do anything shyly around him. She had absolutely no reason to ever feel like she needed to be anything less than her true self around him. He struggled with a way to express all of that.
“No problem babe. I’ll be right back.” Jeff forgave himself for wimping out. He’d be better off talking to her about serious stuff after she’d had coffee. Any conversation before she got coffee in her system, she’d declare null and void anyway. He walked over and filled up two of the large Styrofoam cups with coffee and copious amounts of Splenda. It was the only sweetener they both liked. It was hard waking up every morning to a cup of something you loved knowing that those little yellow packets wouldn’t be available forever.
Jeff handed Yue her cup of coffee and the recommendations section of the report he’d edited the night before. Yue read it in between sips of coffee. She didn’t seem super concerned one way or the other. When she was done, she simply reached over and held Jeff’s hand in her own.
“I like feeling normal like this. I know I’m anti-depressed as hell with all the pills I keep popping but it’s so much better than the alternative. If I go back to Weathertop, do I lose you again?” Yue asked looking him in the eyes. Jeff knew better than to try and lie. Yue had told him plenty of times that he should never bother playing poker.
“You don’t lose me ever. I probably won’t be welcome back at Weathertop though. I’m not sure you will be either if they think you’ll need crawlerz around you to experiment.” Jeff answered honestly.
“The report doesn’t say I can sometimes control them, does it?” Yue asked.
“Nope. We haven’t told anybody that part.” Jeff answered simply. Yue was a smart girl. She understood politics and relationships and unspoken power dynamics better than anyone else Jeff knew. She’d know why they’d left that out without any of them having to say anything. None of them wanted her locked up in a cage being poked and prodded. Scientists would tie her down and try to figure out how she was doing what she was doing. They’d seek to weaponize her.
“If what I can do can help then I should be willing to submit and be studied.” Yue said.
“Do you want to submit, or do you want to figure out what you’re able to
do on your own and help in the fight directly? Once you’re in Weathertop they own you.” Jeff felt bad about being so blunt, but they didn’t have much time left. He needed to know what Yue wanted. With her acting normal again he felt like he had the moral high ground to ask instead of just working hard to get her shipped somewhere safe no matter the personal cost.
“I have no desire to submit. I’d rather do what we talked about all along. Fight to make the world safe for everybody again. I guess we won the rebellion against the government. As far as I can tell now refugees are welcomed and allowed to fight right alongside the soldier boys. Mr. President must have done the math and realized he needed some help.” Yue said.
“Something like that. I need to know what you want me to tell Major Tom.” Jeff said with a half-smile. President Thompson could care less about the refugees. He did care about the support of the military though and the military cared about the refugees.
“First he needs to get a promotion or change his name. I’ve had that song stuck in my head since you first introduced him. I want to stay here with you. I want to fight the good fight. I want to put the infected to rest and carve off a safe little corner to raise kids and live as much of the apocalyptic American dream as possible.” Yue answered leaning forward to give Jeff a quick kiss. What a change from the day before. She’d confessed to him then that when he kissed her all she could think about was sinking her teeth into this lips and ripping them off.
“Raise kids?” Jeff asked raising an eyebrow.
“Not yours. I’m hoping there’s better options out there.” Yue teased before turning serious as something occurred to her. “Don’t tell Lisa we’re trying to stay here. I imagine she’s already got her bags packed and can’t wait to get back to the citadel of safety.”
“Pretty much nailed it. Ok. I’m going to go talk to Mr. Thomas and then I’ll be right back.” Jeff said. Yue nodded her appreciation at him avoiding saying Tom with this title again. She kissed him one more time before he left. This time she did it with the passion turned up quite a bit. By the way he kissed her back he wasn’t too worried about her biting off his lips. Jeff walked out of the car with a goofy look on his face. He gave a quick wave to the four other people from their group who’d appeared out of nowhere to check on Yue.
Lisa in particular had been eyeing the kissing couple suspiciously. It didn’t look like a ‘goodbye I’m never going to see you again’ kind of kiss to her. It looked more like an ‘I’m really happy we have this secret to share that’s going to screw Lisa out of a nice safe place to live’ kiss. She really wished Jeff wasn’t leaving. She’d be able to get the truth out of him in like five seconds. Yue was a much harder nut to crack even if she was in the process of going nuts.
“Think we’ll be heading back to Weathertop anytime soon?” Jeff heard Lisa asking Yue right as he walked out of earshot. He smiled to himself knowing Yue would expertly parry the question. If he’d been standing there Lisa would’ve known what was up immediately. He’d made it out in the nick of time. He headed towards the offices in the train station to find the major. He needed to let him know what him and Yue had discussed.
The major was drinking a cup of coffee and talking to his man Lipsey by the entrance to the train depot. A few Marines were walking around shining lights into all the dark nooks and crannies to make sure nothing was hiding in them. Tom saw Jeff walking his way and met him a few steps from the wall.
“Did you get the chance to talk to Yue?” Tom asked skipping the standard pleasantries.
“Good morning to you too. Yeah. We talked this morning. She wasn’t feeling great last night. The Valium seems to be doing the trick though. She’s going to be more useful to the effort here. At Weathertop she’d be locked away safely underground but it’s not like they’re going to bring crawlerz in the base for her to practice on. Here she’s in the thick of it with men all working towards the same goal.” Jeff kept it short and sweet. There were way too many tangents that could come up if he talked any longer.
“Ok. Sounds good. Let me review how you wrote up the recommendation and I’ll package that up to send back to the train. I’ll answer the same way in radio communications.” Tom said.
Jeff was an equal to Tom. The case could be made that Jeff ranked higher than Tom actually. Jeff had been given a cabinet position by the former President. The current President had reinstated him, but it was arguable if the intention had been for him to resume his cabinet position. That all made it awkward to end conversations in the very tradition oriented military. At the end of every conversation Tom expected either to be saluted or to have to salute. He either dismissed someone or was dismissed himself. Since he was a major now, he did most of the dismissing. Jeff being as socially awkward as he was didn’t help.
After a muttered goodbye Jeff turned and walked back towards the train. There was an eventful day lined up. A train full of reinforcements would be arriving in the afternoon to replace those lost in the high school fiasco. When that train was sent back it’d have the report on Yue riding on it. Hopefully the recipient would agree with their assessment and let Yue stay in Fayetteville. The report also had some preliminary conceptual planning around the ‘mobility campaign’ Jeff had outlined the previous night. Tom had taken it to heart and turned it into a homework assignment for himself to write up that piece the previous night. Jeff would be meeting with Tom before the train arrived to review and add ideas to it over lunch.
Yue walked out of the train with her brothers on either side of her. Both of them were being super watchful considering how many times they’d seen her faint lately. Jeff was happy to see Yue still looked alert and happy. The happy part may be due to the Valium smirk she couldn’t seem to wipe off her face. Jeff nodded at her and she smiled back to indicate message received. Lisa watched the exchange between the two of them suspiciously.
Their attention was violently grabbed by the sound of shots being fired right behind them. Spinning around they were in time to see a Marine emptying his weapon into a formerly obese infected man who’d launched himself at the Marine from underneath a pile of rotting lumber. The crawler walked through the cloud of bullets being spewed at him until he finally collapsed. The man must’ve weighed over three hundred pounds at one time based on the big folds of nasty looking skin hanging off his frame.
“Nasty.” Lisa said shuddering. They all watched as the Marine left to get wood and lighter fluid to burn the monster where it lay. Cremations had gotten super cheap as everyone learned how to do them. Not that burning a body removed the bones and thick piles of gunk that were let behind. You only needed to step in one of those biohazard landmines once to understand why sandals and flip flops had no place in the apocalypse.
Seeing the Marine had it under control Jeff turned his attention back to Yue. She looked like someone had just punched a baby in front of her. Like she’d just suffered some cataclysmic epiphany that she was ashamed of.
“I can’t keep taking the pills.” Yue said. Everyone turned around to look at her.
“Why not? They block out all that crap and let you lead your life.” Drew said. Lisa and Harley nodded in agreement. Neither of them could imagine having to deal with what Yue had been dealing with. Harley was already popping anti-depressants like skittles. He had zero desire to be on the same wavelength as the infected. LeBron was the one who got it first.
“You didn’t sense that crawler rushing the Marine, did you?” LeBron asked her softly.
“No. The drugs are blocking it.” Yue said in frustration. A frustration that confused everyone else since the whole point of the drugs was to block the infected from using her head as a relay station.
“If that’d been us walking around down there instead of the Marine...” LeBron said. The silence that greeted that statement bespoke everyone’s sudden understanding of the dilemma Yue was facing.
“I can’t walk around blind during the day. Not when I can protect you all. If one of you got killed or turned and I could’ve
prevented it. That Marine down there would’ve gone down if he hadn’t been lucky enough to be looking the right way at the right time. I could’ve warned him or maybe even stopped that skin bag attacking him. I’m going to need to be up on the crawler net every day. As long as we’re sleeping in train cars I can dose up at night for relief.” Yue said with finality.
“Understood babe. I’m hoping once we go mobile, you’ll get relief during the day too. We should be spending a lot of our time in the middle of nowhere. We can kill whatever random ones you sniff out for us.” Jeff said. He realized after saying it that he hadn’t told them all the updated status on the plan for mobile living. Jeff spent the next few minutes filling them in on what he’d talked to Tom and crew about the night before.
“What’s her face we picked up on the island and dropped at the dam would be a good one to talk to on the renewable energy piece.” Harley said. Despite being such a big man he was often so quiet that you could forget he was standing there.
“Good call. Amita’s a pain in the ass but she’s super sharp. Carl might have some good ideas too. We’ll see if we can pick her brain over the radio. I don’t know that we need to actually go see her. Every time someone goes out to the dam, they risk dragging the infected along with them.” Jeff said.
Crawlerz | Book 4 | From The Ashes Page 14
