Under an Alaskan Sky

by Jennifer Snow

  “About that... I, uh...stopped by the bar this morning. I was surprised to find your office door locked.” He put his hands on his hips and eyed him suspiciously.

  “Oh, um...” Shit. Reed would be happy for him and Cassie, but would the guy really want to know that Tank had been with his sister earlier that morning?

  He didn’t have a sister, but he was going with no.

  “Look, your business is your business,” Reed continued, “and if you and Montana have reconnected, and you’re happy, then that’s cool, but I just think Cassie deserves to know.” Big brother protection was on full display and it was obvious that if he and Montana were hooking up, it was definitely not “cool” with Reed.

  Tank shook his head. “Reed, nothing is going on with Montana and me...”

  “But I heard... There was definitely a woman in there.”

  Shit. It was either tell him the truth or risk getting punched in the face. Actually the truth might spur that reaction, as well. “Your sister.”

  Reed looked slightly ill. “What? Oh shit...seriously?”

  Tank nodded. “Feel better?”

  “I’d say more disgusted, but definitely relieved,” Reed said, punching him in the shoulder.

  Better than the face.

  CHAPTER TWENTY

  THE ANCHORAGE ADDICTION TREATMENT CENTER number lighting up her phone had her hesitating before answering. Cassie never knew what to expect when she answered her father’s calls.

  Some days were good. He was sticking to the detox program and making progress. Other days he threatened to quit the program—again—and walk away from his third attempt at getting sober.

  She checked the calendar on the wall before answering.

  Day eighty-nine of his ninety-day program. He was so close this time. One more day. If he bailed now, it would be the hardest one to deal with.

  “Hi, Dad,” she said, answering just before the call went to voice mail.

  “Hey, Cassie Lassie...”

  The nickname he’d always used for her. She smiled, relieved that he sounded happy, relaxed. This was a good day.

  She pushed all of her stress aside. “How are you?”

  “Better than the last time we spoke...”

  At day sixty-four, when he’d yelled and cried and demanded that they all love him for who he was and not insist on him changing. He was who he was, he’d said. Why couldn’t they accept that? Accept him?

  She remained silent when he would rant like that, knowing it was part of the process. The addictions center had provided her with her own support line and had equipped her with the tools she needed to survive the ninety-day journey as her dad’s major source of support.

  His words during those calls were a reflection of his disease, the struggles he was facing and the demons he battled, so she took nothing to heart. She simply told him she loved him and was there for him. Repeating that support throughout his treatment was important.

  But today was a better day.

  “One more day,” he said, sounding hopeful, something she hadn’t heard from him before.

  “Nothing. A blink.” One more day to complete the program, but then that was when the real hard journey started. Leaving the clinic ninety days sober was an amazing accomplishment, but outside of the clinic, living each day without alcohol would be the greatest test. He’d be challenged constantly. Was he strong enough to resist being pulled back under?

  “I wanted to talk about my plans for when I leave here...”

  Was he coming back to Wild River? Did he need a place to stay? Admittedly, she hadn’t been confident that he would complete the program, so she hadn’t really planned for what came next.

  Of course whatever he needed, she’d provide. He was her father.

  “That’s probably a good idea. What are your plans exactly?”

  “Point Hope.”

  She blinked. “The dry village in Northern Alaska?”

  “Yes. I know staying sober isn’t going to be possible if I come to Wild River. I’m so, so sorry. I know I said I wanted to get better to come back to you all, but I don’t think it’s the right step for me...not yet anyway. But you can come to Point Hope anytime. I’ve spoken to a company there and arranged lodging and a job—it’s just maintenance work, but it’s honest work and I’ll be around people who can help me stay on track. Temptations won’t be there, so I have a chance. Once I’m stronger, then I can look at coming back...to Wild River or Willow Lake.”

  Cassie was speechless. This was the last thing she’d expected when she’d answered the call. Her dad had a plan. A real one. Lodging and a job. She wasn’t sure how to respond... He really was determined to get better this time. Live a better life.

  “You’re disappointed...”

  “No!” She cleared her throat. “No. I’m the complete opposite of disappointed. I’m proud of you, Dad.”

  Silence on the other end of the line, except for the sound of him swallowing hard. Tears gathered in her own eyes.

  “You’ll visit?” he asked finally.

  “Of course. And so will Reed and Mom if you want...” They would. She may have been his main source of support, but the whole family had been praying for his success.

  “Actually, Cass... I’ve been talking to your mom—just through letters that I’m allowed to send.”

  Yes, she knew about the letters to her mom and to Reed. It was part of the process and it was good for all of them. Helping them move on from years of hurt and sadness...

  “She’s planning to move to Point Hope too. With me.”

  Okay, now she was really in shock. Her mother hadn’t said a word. “Really?”

  “Yes. She said I could tell you. I don’t want to take her away from you...”

  “Dad, she’s all yours,” Cassie said with a laugh. Her mother would be the strength her father needed in his journey. This explained the decluttering and selling the house... It filled Cassie with only joy. She’d miss having her mom close, but she’d visit them both in Point Hope.

  “You’re sure?” her dad asked.

  “Absolutely.”

  “Okay, gotta go. I’ll call you soon. I love you.”

  “Love you too, Dad. Stay strong.”

  She disconnected the call and sat back in her chair with a smile. Her parents were going to make a go of it. In a safe, healthy community. Their best chance at making a future work. Her dad wanted that. They both did. There was a reason her mom hadn’t filed for divorce all these years.

  And having her parents back together was any kid’s dream, right?

  Her heart sank as the thought hit her and only an image of Tank and Montana came to mind. It had always been a dream of Cassie’s... Was it also a dream for Kaia?

  * * *

  TANK HAD BEEN banished to the living room by his ten-year-old. “What are you doing in there?”

  “You’ll see. Have some patience,” came Kaia’s reply from the kitchen.

  Tank grinned as the smell of grilled cheese reached him. “Be careful using the stove!”

  “Dad, shhhh... I got this.”

  She had this.

  Tank didn’t doubt it. His little girl was nothing if not determined. She’d always been stubborn and headstrong and while at times it was challenging, when she was challenging him, he loved those traits about her. They would serve her well in the future.

  Grabbing the television remote, he flipped to the basketball game and sat back against the couch cushions.

  “Dinner’s almost...” Kaia stopped when she saw him. “What are you wearing?”

  Tank glanced at his old Gold’s Gym sweatshirt he’d had since he was eighteen. Tattered, full of holes and threadbare. Comfy. “My sweatshirt.”

  “You have to change for dinner.”

  “Why?”

  Kaia rolled her eyes.
“Because I don’t want to dine with you smelling like old gym socks.”

  “Hey, this sweatshirt is...” He sniffed it. “Okay, you have a point.” Standing, he pulled the sweatshirt off over his head.

  The sound of the doorbell had Kaia’s eyes widening. “She’s early.”

  Tank’s narrowed. “Who’s early?”

  Kaia pushed him toward his bedroom. “Don’t worry about it. Just go get a shirt on. A nice one,” she said.

  Ahhhhh, so she was up to a little matchmaking. He grinned. Grilled cheese sandwiches were Cassie’s favorite. She would be touched that Kaia remembered. Maybe tonight would be the perfect opportunity to let his daughter know that he and Cassie had been making strides forward on their own. “Okay, okay... I’ll get dressed.”

  Kaia closed his bedroom door behind her and a second later, he heard the front door open.

  Tank surveyed the possible choices for a nice shirt in his closet. He only had two dress shirts. A white one he wore to weddings and funerals and one covered in multicolored surfboards that he wore on beach vacations.

  Reaching for the white one, he put it on, leaving the top few buttons undone and rolling the sleeves for a more casual vibe. Then he ran some gel through his hair, washed his face and left the bedroom.

  He hadn’t spoken to Cassie since the awkward way they’d left things earlier that day and he should have been smart enough to plan a dinner. His daughter might well be saving his dumb ass.

  Kaia was clanging away in the kitchen, the sound of plates and cutlery revealing she was setting a nice table for them. And noise from the living room told him she must have blocked Cassie from seeing the surprise, as well.

  “You’ve been exiled from the kitchen too?” he asked entering.

  “Yes. What is she up to in there?”

  Shit. “Montana?”

  Her smile faded. “Expecting someone else?”

  Yes. Was she in on this? Kaia’s matchmaking? Damn, this was not what he’d been expecting. At all. “I thought it was Cass at the door, actually.”

  Montana looked slightly confused. Then, taking in his white dress shirt and gelled hair, she assessed the rest of the situation quickly. “Oh shit. She’s making dinner for us?”

  Tank nodded. “You didn’t know about it?”

  “Of course not. Did you think I put her up to this?” Montana hissed.

  Not anymore. His ex looked as panicked and uneasy about this turn of events as he was. “What are we going to do? We can’t exactly go through with a romantic candlelit dinner together.”

  Soft music started to play throughout the house. Oh shit. He tugged at the collar of his shirt, sweat pooling on his lower back.

  “But you could have with Cassie?” Montana asked, her tone unreadable.

  He nodded. May as well be honest. They all needed to know the truth. He and Cassie were together. It might be complicated and slightly messy at times. He might fuck things up along the way as he had that morning, but they were together.

  “So, things between you two...?”

  “None of your business, but yes. We’re together.”

  “Right.” Okay, there was definitely disappointment in her voice now.

  What the hell? He ran a hand through his hair. How the hell did they get out of this? And what was the meaning of Montana’s one-word response just now? She knew he and Cassie were more than just friends. And shit, she hadn’t said anything about him and her getting back together. He’d assumed they were on the same page about that. The past was the past. He didn’t have those feelings for her anymore.

  She’d never really had them for him. So, why this reaction now?

  “Okay, you guys can come into the kitchen now,” Kaia called out.

  Did they have to? Maybe he could fake a call from the station or maybe Montana could fake an illness. “How do you want to play this?”

  Unfortunately, her expression softened. “I think we just go through with it.”

  “I’m sorry—what?”

  “She went to a lot of trouble. We will break her heart if we tell her we won’t have dinner together.”

  “Leading her to think that something—that feelings—exist between us is wrong.” He needed to talk to Kaia about the situation with Montana. Clearly she’d come to her own conclusions. Damn, he’d been so concerned about her feelings and her reconnecting with her mother, he hadn’t thought to clarify their own relationship.

  “We’re still friends, Tank.”

  “Or close proximity thereof...”

  Montana scoffed. “It’s only one dinner. We will turn off the music and blow out the candles. When I leave, you can talk to Kaia...explain things.”

  Oh good. Once again, it would be all on him. That was probably for the best, though. He wouldn’t want to hand off tough conversations to Montana. Unfortunately, he didn’t see any other way around this. “Fine.”

  Tank followed Montana to the kitchen and forced a smile as he entered. Indeed, the kitchen lights were dimmed. On the center of the table were two flickering candles, and a bouquet of multicolored daisies in a glass vase Tank had forgotten he even owned. Glasses of lemon water and a pitcher of the same sat on the table in front of two place settings with grilled cheese sandwiches and apple slices.

  Two place settings. Only two.

  “Wow, this is wonderful!” Montana said. “You cooked by yourself?”

  Kaia beamed. “Do you like it, Dad?” she asked, turning to him.

  “Yes! It’s...yeah, it’s wonderful...like your mom said.” Damn, he sounded like a moron. His daughter would see straight through the fake enthusiasm. “Um...where’s your plate?”

  “Oh, I’m not staying.”

  “What? Where are you going?”

  He heard a truck pull into the driveway and his heart raced. A hip-hop song on blast could be heard drifting in through the open windows.

  Kaia grinned. “There’s my ride. I’ll let you two enjoy dinner.” She hugged them both quickly and left the kitchen.

  “Just a second...” Tank called out after her. “You called Cassie to come get you?” Had she told Cass about all of this?

  “Yeah.” Kaia’s expression changed as her face fell. “Is that okay? I just wanted the two of you to have some time alone together. To talk.”

  It appeared she was hoping for more than just her parents talking. Tank sighed as he forced another smile. “It’s fine, but you and I need to chat later, okay?”

  He followed Kaia to the front door and opened it. His gaze met Cassie’s behind her steering wheel as Kaia ran out to the truck. The way her pained expression took in his appearance, he knew he was in the doghouse. Damn! Not breaking his daughter’s heart meant digging him an even deeper hole with Cass.

  He waved.

  She ignored him.

  Yep, he was screwed.

  Closing the front door, Tank reluctantly returned to the kitchen. The lights were back on and the candles were blown out. A little less awkward at least. Montana was leaning against the counter, a bite of a grilled cheese sandwich in her mouth. “Couldn’t wait, huh?” he said in an attempt to lighten the mood.

  Montana swallowed the food. “Was Cassie pissed?”

  “I’m sure she will be fine once I explain this misunderstanding.”

  Montana nodded but her expression made him nervous as she said, “What if this is more than just a misunderstanding?”

  His pulse raced. “What do you mean?”

  “Kaia obviously wants us to reconnect. She’s asked me about us a few times—wanting to hear the story about how we met, how we...fell in love.”

  Tank coughed. Only he had. For her, their relationship had been a fling. Even when she returned, pregnant, she hadn’t been in love with him. They’d only agreed to try to make things work for the baby’s sake. “She’s asked me about us over
the years as well and I usually focus the story on her—how lucky I am to have her.”

  “That’s really great. You’re a wonderful father, Theo.” The intimacy in her voice told him she’d called him by his real name on purpose.

  His spine stiffened as he started clearing the table. “What did you tell her?” He hoped she hadn’t given Kaia the wrong ideas about them. He may have loved Montana years before, but he’d healed from that experience and moved on.

  “I wasn’t sure what to say. I told her how we met, that we were amazing friends...” She took a step toward him and touched his forearm. “Maybe now things could be different...there could be more.”

  Was she serious?

  Tank took a step away from her and her hand fell away. “No. There couldn’t.” He was struggling to open up and be vulnerable with a woman who had always been there for him and Kaia, a woman he loved, his best friend... Montana had broken his heart twice and they were barely friends anymore. Did she really think they would be together again?

  “Because of Cassie?” she asked.

  “Yes, and also because you and I are a thing of the past...”

  “We have a daughter together,” she said.

  “And that will never change, but that wasn’t enough before.” He dumped his sandwich in the garbage, his appetite vanishing, and put the plate in the sink. He needed to keep moving, the nervous energy coursing through him making his hands shake slightly.

  “We need to think about Kaia,” Montana said.

  Tank blew out a deep breath. “That’s all I’ve been doing. For ten years. I’ve always put our daughter first.” At the sacrifice of a relationship with Cassie. His own chance at love. A real love, not the casual way Montana had approached their relationship.

  Cassie loved him. And he put his and Kaia’s feelings before her. All the time. His fear of commitment and fear of being hurt again all came before what Cassie wanted. The realization made him feel even worse.

  “I know that,” Montana said softly. “I’m just saying, if there’s a chance...if you have any feelings left for me...”