“I think that you are throwing away something that could have been great.” Henry sounded sad as if he were saying goodbye to a childhood friend.
“This could never have been great. I’m just glad I found out what kind of a man you are before I married you and tied myself to you for the rest of our lives.”
Two children wandered into the room and took their seats at the wooden desks that were set in neat, straight rows.
“My class is about to start. It isn’t proper for you to be here and I suggest you leave before anyone else shows up.”
Henry nodded with a reluctant look in his eyes. “I can only hope you’ll come around, Lana. My life isn’t the same without you.”
“Don’t count on it,” Lana muttered under her breath as she watched Henry leave. She wasn’t a very confrontational person. She preferred to keep things nice and quiet, dealing with people through conversations instead of through drastic measures or through actions.
But she knew that when it came to Henry, she was willing to go out of her comfort zone. She had never felt so disrespected, or so completely deceived as she had when she had found out about Henry’s activities when he wasn’t around her.
The time when she had cared for him or when she looked at him with admiration seemed like a cruel joke now, far away in her memory.
“Miss Smith?” A little girl was standing on the other side of the teacher’s desk. She had two braids hanging over her shoulders and a look full of curiosity and wonder.
“Yes?” Lana stood so she could get a better look at the girl. She was one of her better students and Lana always tried to answer her questions.
“Can we read a story today?” The little girl’s eyes filled with excitement and Lana’s heart melted. It was because of children like this that she enjoyed her job so much.
“Of course. That sounds like a wonderful idea.”
The little girl clapped her hands together and then hurried back to her seat, looking eager for the class to start.
Once the rest of the desks had filled with boys and girls, Lana rang the big silver bell that sat on her desk to mark the start of class time.
She could still make today a good day, despite her earlier interaction with Henry. She tried to push the remains of her irritation away and tuck it into the deep recesses of her memory.
---*---
Lana waved goodbye to the last straggling child, then turned and locked up the schoolhouse. Another successful day of classes had passed without event.
Her gaze brushed over the general store. There were times when she wondered if she and Henry had worked at different places that weren’t so close together if they would ever have ever had a relationship in the first place.
She would never know, but she could always wonder. If it wasn’t for Henry and the bitter taste of what he had done to her, she would still love this job and this town the way she had before. But she couldn’t change the past or alter her memories, no matter how much she wanted to.
She walked briskly down the main street, heading towards home. There was one place she wanted to stop by; the post office.
She quickened her step a little as the small building came into view. When she walked up to the window, the older man behind it was already searching through his letters with a knowing smile on his face.
Lana frequented the post office almost every single day. It was her one lifeline to one of the only reliable people that she had known most of her life.
When the old man slid a weathered envelope to her over the counter, her heart leaped a little. She loved getting Ginger’s letters. They were always a breath of fresh air that kept her going a little longer.
She tore open the envelope and read as she walked.
Dearest Lana,
I know I haven’t written for some time, but it’s been because I am so busy, I can hardly find time to take care of myself.
The children are growing bigger every day, but also harder to care for. I can’t seem to get them to listen to me. Sometimes they just run around everywhere and I just can’t keep up.
Nick is the biggest help. He helps whenever he can. He comes over to check on us every day and takes the children out for a bit to ride the horses or go fishing when he isn’t too busy. That gives me a chance to clean the house or do a little laundry.
The plants are doing well, and our cattle have been growing in number which is good. Two new calves were born this week. They are so adorable!
I think that Daniel is going to try and buy some more land on the west side of our property. He wants to grow more corn next year.
This is the first year I have been able to grow squash. Daniel got some seeds of a new type from a trader who was passing through. The plants are growing well and they have little round squash growing on the vines now. I can’t wait to see what they look like when they are ready.
I hope that you can come to visit us one of these days just like we always talked about. We would love to have you.
I know that this is short, but I have to go. I think Lydia spilled something in the kitchen.
Take care and write soon.
Love,
Your friend Ginger
Lana smiled and read the letter a second time, making sure she hadn’t missed anything. She and Ginger had known each other at school when Ginger’s family had lived in Southport.
They had also been neighbors and when Lana’s mother went to visit Ginger’s mother, she would always take Lana with her.
The two had played together for hours when they had been children. Then when Ginger and Daniel had married and moved west to take up a homestead, Lana and Ginger had lost touch for a time.
They had started writing to each other again a couple of years later and Lana had never had a better friend. They talked about everything as if they were sisters.
Lana had meant to go and visit Ginger for some time now, but she had never been able to find the right break in her life in the city.
She had her job teaching and she had the activities that she participated in. Also, the thought of taking such a journey terrified her. Some of the things that Ginger talked about made Lana doubt that she would be capable of living in the west herself. She was raised in the city and in a way, she loved the city. She loved the bustle of people and the simplicity of having everything nearby. She wasn’t sure what she would do cooped up in a cabin raising children and farming.
She shook her head and tucked Ginger’s letter away inside one of her books. She would write to her as soon as she got the chance; hopefully, that evening after dinner.
When she got to her little townhouse, she hurried inside and set her books on the table before going about preparing dinner.
Humming to herself helped keep her from feeling alone. For the most part, she didn’t mind living alone. But there were times when she did feel a little uneasy and wished that she had someone to share her days with.
A sound at the back door made her jump a little.
She tried to ignore it, but it continued. It sounded like a soft thumping sound. After a few more minutes, Lana took hold of the broom and approached the back door with caution.
She opened it slowly and breathed out a sigh of relief when she spotted a grey kitten knocking a stick of wood in circles. He was chasing the stick until he collapsed in a heap on top of it and wrestled with the small piece of wood as if it too had teeth and claws.
She let out a little giggle. Sometimes living alone made her a little more paranoid than she should be.
She watched the kitten for a few more minutes and then went back to the kitchen. Despite living alone, she always made sure to eat a good meal and go to sleep at a good hour. She loved routine and order and she loved having everything in its place.
It had been one thing that had driven Henry nuts when they were together. “Guess he doesn’t have to worry about that anymore,” Lana said softly to herself.
Speaking to herself was a habit she had picked up recently. Somehow it made the
house feel a little less empty and a little more bearable.
Once she had eaten and picked up after the meal, she lit a lamp and began preparing the lesson for the next day. The school year was almost over. It made her both happy and sad at the same time. She enjoyed the break she got from teaching the kids, but there were also days that the loneliness felt even heavier.
She sighed and let her gaze wander out the window. It was almost too dark to see but Lana could still make out the outline of the tree outside her window
She stood, walked over and closed the curtains. There wasn’t much space between her home and her neighbor’s home. She wouldn’t want anyone peeking into her kitchen, or her living room for that matter.
Once that was done, it was time to prepare for bed. She let her routines carry her through her chores and at last slipped underneath the blankets into her bed. Tomorrow was another day. It would probably be very similar to today, but she knew that each day bore new possibilities and every day should be given a chance.
Chapter 2
Nick set the last bundle of feed on the wagon and then climbed up into the driver’s seat. He had been out on the ranch since early morning and was looking forward to getting home and having some coffee and a little time to relax.
“Come on boys!” he called to his two dogs, Buddy and Storm. They were his two constant companions. They were almost better than having ranch hands. While they couldn’t really help much with chores, they were nice company to have around and they did a good job of guarding the ranch and ranch animals.
Buddy was a tall, red, sleek hound dog with long ears. When anything was amiss his booming half - bark, half - howl was enough to scare anyone out of their wits. He was a long – legged goof at times and bounced around like a puppy whenever Nick had been away for a while and then returned home. He acted like a lunatic, wagging his whole body and running in ever-widening circles in his excitement to see his master.
Storm was a small collie type dog, intense and dedicated to the farm animals. He was ferocious with predators and gentle with the cows, gladly herding them into the barn for milking. His coat was a mixture of white and black that swirled together like a storm cloud, thus giving him his name.
Nick had followed Ginger and Daniel out to Missouri two years after they left. There was nothing for him in the city that he really wanted and he missed his sister.
He knew nothing about ranching when he arrived but got a job working for an older rancher a few miles out of Cattle lake. He was a quick learner and took to ranch life quickly. He loved working with the horses most of all. There were things that he loved about it and things that he hated. But in time he was ready for his own homestead and staked a claim on the land adjacent to his sister’s land.
He looked up at the sky. It was late afternoon and it looked like there was a rainstorm brewing. He gave a little smile. He loved rain and storms. It was always nice to just sit in front of the fireplace with his dogs’ company and enjoy an early evening over a cup of coffee.
He tapped the reins against the horses’ backs, urging them to go a little faster. They were eager to get back to the barn and their feed and didn’t wait for a second invitation to hurry.
As he approached the house, he scrunched his eyebrows in confusion. There were two riders on their horses in front of the barn. As Nick pulled up, they turned to him.
Nick recognized them as the deputies from town.
“Howdy, what’s going on?” Nick called as he pulled the horses to a stop and leaped down to the ground.
“Nick! Thank goodness we found you. We were about to give up.”
Nick’s heart fell into his stomach and he felt the worry fill his mind. “What’s going on?” It was a strange thing for them to come looking for him on his ranch. They all knew each other but Nick didn’t have a lot to do with the deputies.
“There’s been an accident,” one of the deputies said with a grim look towards his partner. Nick’s breath caught.
“With who? Is Ginger okay?” As his last family, Ginger was the first person to pop into mind. He hurriedly began to unhitch the team.
“She’s okay,” the deputies exchanged glances again and Nick clenched his jaw.
“What’s going on? Just tell me.”
“I’m sorry to tell you this but Daniel is dead, and Ginger is at the doctor’s clinic. She was hurt in the accident. Just a broken leg, it looks like.” The deputy bearing the news refused to meet Nick’s gaze.
Nick slipped the last of the harness off of the horses. He pulled one of them hastily into the barn and then into its stall before hurrying back with a saddle for the second one. In a few minutes, he was mounted and ready to go.
“Come on, you can tell me about it on the way.”
The deputies nodded and the three of them set off at a brisk pace toward town.
“They were coming back from Lansburgh as far as we can tell. The team of horses got spooked and they couldn’t control them. The pin must have snapped. The whole wheel of the carriage in front came off. Daniel was caught under the wagon and died in the accident.”
Nick let the news wash over him, fighting to stay calm. Daniel may not have been family by blood, but he had been as good as family to Nick as his sister’s husband.
“What about the children?”
“They were in the accident too but as far as we can tell they are just a little bruised and scared.”
A wave of relief washed over Nick. If something had happened to either Freddy or Lydia… They were so young and hadn’t had a chance at life yet. “Thank goodness they are okay. Do you know any details on how it happened?”
“We’re not exactly sure, we came to get you as soon as we could.”
“You’re sure that Daniel is…dead?” When the deputies nodded in unison, Nick knew that they were telling the truth. There was nothing that he could do to change it now. His brother-in-law was dead.
He was sure that Ginger was going to be devastated. They had been married for 10 years and yet he had seen few people as infatuated as Ginger was with Daniel. It was never easy to lose someone that you loved. They both knew that from experience.
There were times when Nick thought their family was cursed. It seemed that they were losing each other one by one. If it continued this way, there would be one of them left and then none. Nick hoped that he was wrong.
But they had already lost both of their parents and now they had lost Daniel.
The doctor’s home came into view and Nick jumped from his horse before the animal had come to a full stop. He had to make sure his sister was all right.
He had to see with his own eyes that she was alive and unharmed. He knocked on the doctor's door and almost burst in without invitation when it took longer than a few moments for it to open. When it did, a solemn-looking Doc stared at him with sympathy in his eyes.
“Right this way,” the doctor led him through the parlor and down the hall to the bedroom at the back of the house.
It wasn’t the first time that Nick had been to the doctor’s home. He was the only doctor for miles around. No one in town cared that he ran his clinic out of his home. They were lucky to have a doctor who had actually studied medicine.
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