“Since you don’t have a clue what I like, you’ve been talking to Carli or Anita.” I opened the door wider letting him inside.
“A little birdie might have told me what to order.” He looked me over wearing a deep frown. “You look like shit, Leah. Have you been eating?”
“I eat.”
“When’s the last time you ate a good meal?”
“I ate yesterday.”
“What do you call a good meal?”
“Are you here to scold me?”
“Leah,” he warned. “When is the last time you ate something good for you?”
“I had a bowl of cereal yesterday. Does that count?”
“Is that all?”
I nodded not willing to admit the day before it had only been a bag of chips.
“I’m coming over twice a day from here on out. Don’t even think about adding me to that damn list with security.”
“At least I have a summer bikini body now.”
“You look like shit. I’d bet my life savings you’ve lost at least fifteen pounds.” He placed the containers on the table, and I pulled two glasses from the cabinet.
“What do you want to drink?” I asked ignoring his ranting.
“Water, please. Get a third glass.”
I whipped my head over my shoulder as he pulled three containers of food from the sack.
“Is Carli coming?”
“Nope.”
“Who then?” But I already knew.
“Your mother.”
“I’m… No. I don’t want to talk to Anita. Not yet.”
“The only reason she’s stayed away this long is because I didn’t tell her you were back in Dallas. I told her if she contacted you, I would fire her and if your only reference won’t give you a recommendation, she won’t get another job anytime soon. She resigned this morning without notice with no other job lined up.”
I shrugged. “I don’t care.”
But I did and if dad could read emotions at all he knew I cared.
“You are your father’s child. Stubborn as hell. Get the third glass. Hear her out. Then if you need more time, she’ll give it to you. But at least give her the chance to talk to you.”
“Damn it! What is wrong with you?” I tip-toed up to reach the last glass on the highest shelf since the rest were piled high in the sink.
“How in the hell did you get a scar like that?” he croaked.
To my horror, I tugged the hem of the pajama shirt down as I quickly stood flat making sure it covered my skin. Heat crawled up my neck and he stepped toward me. Getting myself together to cover this shit up had never been more critical because under no circumstances did I want to have that conversation.
“It’s nothing. I had a bicycle accident when I was a kid.” I filled the glasses with ice as if it was no big deal. Thankfully, he only saw a small portion and the majority was inside the waistline of my pants.
“Anita never told me about a bad injury, more specifically a burn. Let me see it!” he urged.
“Umm, no that’s not happening. I’m a grown woman and you’re not about to look at my stomach. I mean that’s not weird at all.”
“Then tell me how the hell it happened. Because that’s not a scar from a healed abrasion.”
The doorbell chimed and I let out the breath I held. “Saved by the bell.”
When I opened the door, nothing prepared me for Anita’s appearance. She looked like death… worse than me and it felt like someone punched me in my gut. Dark circles were present underneath her eyes and she appeared hollow.
“Leah,” she whispered.
“Anita,” I gulped.
“Oh, honey.” Tears rolled down her cheeks. “Oh, my girl.”
But when she took an uneasy step toward me, it was too much too soon. I stepped back and she stopped.
“I… don’t know if I can do this today.”
“Give me a few minutes. Then I’ll leave and won’t come back until you’re ready.”
A few seconds passed before I folded and nodded.
“Come in. Dad was uninvited as well but took it upon himself to bring by Chinese food. Nice gesture after twenty-one years. Oh my gosh, I remembered, this is probably one of five meals we’ve ever eaten together.”
Years of anger unleashed, and pent-up emotions seemed to continue to pour out through my words.
“And now I get to have lunch with my nanny who’s the biggest liar of them all.”
“Leah! That’s enough!” Dad slammed the palms of his hands on the table. “When I left you in Mitchell’s hands, you said you wanted to talk with us. We cannot accomplish anything if you keep spewing hateful remarks that you can never take back.”
She dabbed underneath her reddened eyes. “I’ll go.”
“Stay.” I took a deep breath and closed my eyes for a few seconds. “I want you to stay.”
Dad was right. I had wanted to have dinner and somehow piece us together. But that was while I was in fantasy land with Chad. I had been living with my head in the sand thinking we might have a future together and it gave me hope for my family at the same time.
“Leah, it doesn’t have to be today. I’m only glad I got to see you.”
“Like the old poster in my room, it’s a good day to be a good day.”
A small smile turned the corners of her lips up. Anita had given me that poster when I was thirteen or fourteen.
For a few minutes we ate in silence, until I felt Anita’s staring at me in my peripheral vision. Slowly I turned my eyes toward her. I missed her. I missed us.
“Every day I got to be your mother without the title. Every day I watched you do all the things a mother gets to watch. Your first steps, losing your first tooth, every single birthday. When you got your braces on and the day they came off. Your kindergarten, high-school graduation to becoming a teacher. Your baptism, and I was able to tuck you in at night and said your prayers with you. If that was the only way I could be your mother, then I accepted it because I could be right there with you.”
“You were paid to be there.”
“It was never about the money. I don’t need Harry’s money or to be on anyone’s payroll. My parents were killed in a car accident when I was sixteen and I’ve had a trust fund in my name since turning twenty-five. Every penny Harry has ever paid me, is in an account in your name, Leah. I only wanted to be with you and being your nanny gave me the perfect opportunity so I could be your mother in every sense without having the title.”
Dad whipped his head up, with a dropped jaw clearly dumbfounded with her admission.
“I’ll go to my grave with regret. But I’ll never regret the decision to live the life I chose to be with you,” she added with a deep emotion in her gaze.
Speechless, I dropped the chopsticks onto the plate and looked between them. She was wealthy and spent twenty-one years working as a nanny slash housekeeper… for me.
A rush of tears trickled down my cheeks and in a blink every ounce of anger poured out of my body. Dad bolted toward me and something inside me cracked wide open. He pulled my limp body from the chair into his arms. He held my small frame and I felt Anita’s arms embrace be from the back.
When we parted, a ghost of a smile teased her lips. “Please forgive me.”
“I forgive you. I forgive you both,” I whispered.
“I love you Leah. With all of my heart I love you,” she whispered.
“I know that. I love you too. I love both of you.”
After finishing our meal, dad cleared his throat. “There’s one more thing I need to know from you, Anita. How did Leah get that scar on her abdomen?”
She immediately paled and turned her gaze in my direction.
I flipped my hands in the air. “I told him about the bicycle accident and for whatever reason he thinks there’s more to it.”
“While I was in college I worked as a medic, let alone all the sports injuries I’ve be
en around. That scar’s not from a bicycle wreck. It’s a burn.”
“A medic? One more thing I didn’t know about you.”
“I’m not going to let this lay. I want to know what you’re hiding.”
“You guessed it. I fell off my bicycle in hot coals.”
“Anita, what’s the story behind this?”
“She doesn’t know,” I intercepted.
“I wasn’t speaking to you. I was speaking to your mother.”
That was twice he had referred to her as my mother.
“It’s her story to tell.”
“And I’m not leaving until I have it. Leah, I want to know everything there is to know. I want to know all the things I missed and have no one to blame but myself.”
“I started my period when I was eleven. I drank my first shot of tequila out of your bar when we lived in Tampa. Don’t worry though I wasn’t crazy about smoking pot, so I only did it a couple of times and I smoked cigarettes because I thought it was cool in junior high. Want to know more about me?”
“Don’t be a smart ass.”
Anita let out a chuckle. “There’s my sassy girl.”
“You avoiding the question suggests someone did this to you,” he pushed.
“Yeah. Someone hurt me. My mother took me to the hospital. The guy was dead from an overdose a few weeks later. I refuse to talk any further about that part of my life because it’s in the past where it will stay. The three of us are today and tomorrow. Can you please respect that?”
Dad’s eyes were wide, and his lips tightened. But I looked him dead in the eye until his shoulders slumped and he nodded his head.
“You called me your mother,” Anita said quietly with a cracked voice.
“Because you are.”
Chapter 36
On day nine, I woke up and reached for my phone to stare at Chad’s picture. Like every night before, he was in my dreams. I wanted to scream at his photograph, curse at him. I wanted to delete it, and yet I couldn’t.
Falling in love with him hadn’t been by choice. It was the last thing I’d ever wanted, but it was inevitable because he’d made it so easy.
Vivid memories of us together made me miss the happiest time of my entire life. It was pointless trying to remember the exact moment I fell head over heels in love. I couldn’t define the exact time, but the day I accepted it, every star in the universe had moved into my eyes.
He consumed my every thought.
I missed him so much it hurt.
Nine days felt like a lifetime ago.
I was empty but vowed today would be a new start—a fresh start.
I was going to go to the school and meet with human resources, sign required contracts, and visit my classroom. Then I was going to meet Carli at the cantina for lunch.
Pressing hard on the accelerator, I breezed through the residential area with the sunroof open.
Fuck a broken heart.
Fuck the memories.
Today was going to be a new day.
As I approached the gate, the security guard I only knew as Jude waved. Instead of opening the wrought iron barrier, he rose from his chair inside the station and headed over to my car.
“Good morning, Jude.”
“Ms. Wright. I was about to give you a call. We made an official report with the police on Mr. Chad Mitchell. When you placed him on the no visitation list, I didn’t make the connection of him being the owner of the Lonestar’s, not that it matters. He wasn’t arrested since you haven’t filed a restraining order, but I don’t think he’ll be back.”
All the air whooshed out of my lungs and I felt a sudden rush of dizziness. No doubt he knew my number had been changed so why would he dare to bother? I heard him with my own ears. I was “an obligation”, and that meant booty call.
I was done.
We were over.
I needed my heart to listen to my brain, because my mind knew leaving when I had was the right thing to do—but my heart loved him.
He was toxic.
I fucking let him in—but he would never come in again, not in my heart and never in my soul.
“Thank you, Jude. If he comes back, please let me know so I can file an order with the courts.”
He simply nodded but kept his hands on the top of my car peering inside at me. “Over the course of my life, I’ve seen sheep dressed in wolves clothing. I would never have guessed someone like Mr. Mitchell would be a threat. Don’t you worry, we’ll keep you safe, Ms. Wright.”
I scrunched my eyebrows and I shook my head. “He’s not a physical threat. He broke my heart, that’s all.” My gaze fell to the small row of red hibiscus planted along the street, the same shade as the ones growing all around Chad’s home.
A small smile lit up his face. “Well I’m no Romeo, but he was very persistent about seeing you. Maybe he realized his mistake because he looked pretty rough. Well, enough of my sticking my nose into where it doesn’t belong. You have a good day, dear.”
Jude made his way inside his tiny office and rolled the gates open. I waved passing through and sped away.
Today was not a good day.
What the hell did he want?
Tears welled in my eyes. I swiped my finger along my lower lashes, thankful for waterproof mascara. Biting my lip, I gripped the steering wheel tight and refused to cry over what could have been.
Music blaring, I zipped around a car and pressed harder on the gas for therapeutic power. Zooming into the far lane, I flew past vehicles, changed lanes and the odometer kept climbing. My blood pumped through my veins at a driving force replaying everything Jude had said.
Why in the hell had he tried to come see me?
What if he wanted to try and persuade me to keep playing the role in our “dirty little secret” relationship?
What it that wasn’t it?
What if…What if it were more?
I would bet everything I had, he had called Dad and he sure as hell wouldn’t pick up the phone to let me know Chad was trying to reach me—not with the way he felt about us.
But he wouldn’t lie about it.
I pressed the button with a phone emblem on the steering wheel.
“Call Dad.”
One ring.
Two rings.
“Pick up the damn phone.”
Three rings.
“Good morning, sunshine. What are you doing up so early?”
“I’m on the way to HR to sign my employment papers. I have a few questions and I need you to be totally honest. Can you do that?”
He cleared his throat. “Yes. Leah, I’ll never lie to you.”
“Has Chad called you lately?”
“Why would I talk to Chad? I’m on medical leave, remember?”
“I didn’t ask about your medical leave. I’m asking if he’s called or stopped by to see you.”
“Yes, but you don’t worry about Mitchell. I can handle him. He won’t be making that mistake again. You should also know, I’ve applied with a few teams, but Tennessee looks most promising.”
“You’re moving?”
“Nothing’s been signed, but yes. Also… you can resign from your school position if it’s been less than so many days. There’s nothing holding you back from us moving and you can apply for your Tennessee state teaching certificate.”
“I’m not leaving Dallas. I love it here.”
“Honey, it will give you a fresh start. Tennessee has a lot to offer and…”
“Are you doing all this job searching because of my having an affair with Chad?”
“As soon as I figured it out, I knew it had disaster written all over it. It’s his style. This is what he does, and right now, I want to punch his teeth out.”
“Did he say anything about me?”
“Don’t Leah. It will only make it worse.”
“Tell me what he said,” I imploded for the truth.
There was a long pause before
he sighed in my ear. “He needed to see you, that there were unsaid things. We shared a few choice words and I hung up on the bastard.”
“Is there anything more? I need to know everything!” I breathed in a breath and held onto it as if it were my last.
“Leah.”
“Dad. Please.”
“He demanded I give him your new number and the dumbass thought I was going to hand it over to him. He kept saying you had unfinished business and I let the son-of-a-bitch have it. That’s all. I haven’t answered any of the other calls.”
“When was that?”
“Two days ago, Leah. Honey, you will forget him in time. You’ll be happy again. Don’t call him because it will only make it worse.”
“He’s the only person I want. He made me happy. I love you and maybe I’m making a mistake, but I have to hear what he has to say.”
I pulled into the parking lot of the administrative offices and ended the call. It took what seemed a lifetime to finish signing all the documents that went along with gainful employment, benefits, and retirement packages. The business manager arranged a tour of the campus and we strolled down the hallways as she pointed out my classroom. Large bookcases filled the backwall along with cubicles and colorful bins. We trekked down the hall to the library filled with hundreds and hundreds of books, the cafeteria where the floor was black and white checkered with a red and aqua theme like a retro diner.
“Thank you so much for taking the time to show me around.”
“You’re welcome. Teachers will begin decorating their rooms on August eighth so start thinking about a theme.”
“I will. See you soon.”
Once inside my car, I sat wondering what to do. Part of me wanted to waltz inside his office, but that only made me nauseated. I wasn’t even sure what office, the shiny black building downtown with a large M at the top or the stadium office. Or was he at the beach?
I took another breath of courage and pressed the numbers I knew by heart, only when it went to his voicemail a lump formed in my throat.
“Hi… um… I… Dad told me you’ve been trying to call. I… um… call me back when you get this.” I stumbled all over my words.
Maybe he was in important meetings.
He’d call me.
Keeping Wicked (The Mitchell Brothers Book 3) Page 25
