She was surprised when she got there to find her mum facing the fridge. It took her a moment to realise that her shoulders were shaking a little.
“Mum?” Lee rushed over to her. “Mum, what’s up? Are you crying?”
When Tina turned to face her, it was apparent that crying was exactly what she’d been doing. Tina grabbed some kitchen roll and wiped the evidence from her eyes.
“Ignore me,” she said, with a slightly broken voice. “Are you okay? You ran out of there quickly.”
“Had to be sick,” Lee said. “It’s been fairly constant, to be honest. I didn’t even realise that’s what it was, to start with.” A tear rolled down Tina’s face, and Lee became concerned. “Mum, what is it? I don’t understand?”
“Am I a terrible mother?” she asked, scrutinising Lee with an intensity that made her want to look away.
“What? No, mum, of course you’re not.”
“Because I feel like I must be horrible.”
“Why? Mum, please, I don’t get what you mean.”
“I love you girls, I really do, I just want what’s best for you both,” she said with a sniff.
“We know that, we really do,” Lee insisted.
“You meet someone, fall in love with them, get pregnant - and I know nothing until months down the line? I just don’t understand. Why didn’t you tell me you’d met someone? Why didn’t you tell me it was serious? Everyone knew Lee - everyone but me knew there was this relationship building, so none of them have been quite so blind-sided by the announcement that you’re having a baby. You’re pregnant! With my first grandchild! It should be all celebration and happiness, Lee, but all I can do is tear myself up over the fact that you didn’t share any of it until you absolutely had to.”
“Oh mum,” Lee said, and now she was crying, ugly fat tears that rolled down her cheeks and were certainly ruining that make-up she had carefully checked. “It’s all been so quick. I- I wasn’t sure myself with it all to start with. I was worried I was making a huge mistake, jumping into something so quickly after everything went so disastrously wrong with Nathan.”
“Why didn’t you talk to me about it?” Tina asked, still looking confused.
“Because you’re the only person who would have told me you thought I was making a mistake,” Lee said honestly. “And I didn’t want to think about it, or have any doubts. I wanted to jump head first in and I’m glad I did, mum - I am really happy.” It was an odd thing to say with tears running down her cheeks, but it was true.
“And you thought I’d ruin that?”
“No! But I thought you’d question me, and I’d doubt myself, and I would ruin it. I needed to be sure… But I’m really sorry. I shouldn’t have kept you in the dark…”
They held each other tightly for a few moments, Tina shushing Lee and rubbing her back rhythmically.
“I am pleased for you, Shirley,” she said quietly as they stood there together. “I wanted you to have this clearly set out plan - but most of all, I want you to be happy.”
It was at that moment that James came through the doorway, looking very confused at the sight of two crying women holding onto each other in his kitchen.
“Is… is everything okay?” he asked, looking from one Davis to another.
Lee glanced at her mum - but it was Tina who answered.
“Yes. Everything’s fine, thank you James. I just wanted to congratulate Lee. Come on, lunch is going cold.” With that, she swept back into the dining room, as if no-one had ever been crying in the kitchen - and, thankfully, the assembled family seemed too polite to comment on any tear-stained faces.
The drama and Lee’s sickness seemed to dissipate after that and Lee was pleased about both facts. They enjoyed James' delicious roast dinner - without gravy for Lee, for it seemed that was triggering her sickness today - and all declared themselves too full for pudding for at least another hour. They retired to the living room to flop out on sofas and feel as though their stomachs weren't quite so compressed behind a tight dining room table and while Lee’s mum sat with Beth, James's mum made a beeline for Lee.
“I'm so happy for you,” she said, smiling. “I can see how happy you are, and how happy my James is so I'm not going to say anything about it being quick, because when you know, you know.”
Lee could feel the warmth in her words. “I know it's quick,” she admitted. “We both know that. But you're right - it feels right for both of us and we’re both really happy.”
“He's a good man, James,” his mum said. “He always has been. Are you two going to be living together then? Unless you already are - perhaps my son just hasn't told me.”
Lee smiled. “Don't worry, he's not keeping anything from you - we're not living together yet. When I moved to Totnes, I moved in with a flatmate and I don't want to just leave her in the lurch - but yes, James asked me to live here so we can do this together; raise this baby. He's even mentioned taking it in turns to get up in the middle of the night, which definitely sounds like a winner.”
She smiled. “He definitely is,” she said. “And I think that's lovely. His granny would have been very pleased to know that the two of you were here, raising a family in her house. She always loved this place best when it was full of kids and laughter and love.”
On the other side of Lee. Janet - James' pregnant sister-in-law - decided to slot herself in. But Lee was quite happy to spend some time with her; she didn't know anybody else who was pregnant or who had been recently pregnant and so Janet was an invaluable resource.
“I can't believe this,” she said with a grin. “Both of us having children at practically the same time!”
“I know,” Lee said. “I was saying to James earlier how the last time we were all here, you and Jack announced your pregnancy, and this time we announced ours.”
“I'm so excited though to have two cousins so close in age and living fairly near to each other,” Janet said.
Lee agreed: “Me too. I never had cousins; I was always jealous of these people that seem to have tons of them. It seems like a cousin relationship is a bit easier than a sibling one sometimes!”
Janet laughed. “Definitely. I never wanted to kill my cousins as much as I wanted to my siblings!” Her hand moved to cradle her stomach. “He's kicking again, always about this time he starts.” She caught her husband Jack’s eye across the room, and Lee didn’t miss the look of contentment that passed between them.
“He?” James asked, overhearing. “Do you know it's a boy then?”
“No,” Janet said, shaking her head and smiling. “We don't want to find out. I keep changing my mind about what I think it is. Today I think he's a boy. Tomorrow it’ll undoubtedly be different. Do you want to feel?” she asked, and Lee nodded excitedly. It was something she never felt before - a human life inside another. She gently placed a hand where Janet directed her and almost jumped back when she felt a kick right where her hand lay.
“Oh my god!” she said. “I can't believe how strong he is!”
“I want a go, I want a go,” James said, almost like a little kid, and the assembled family laughed as he too placed his hands on his sister-in-law’s stomach and felt his niece or nephew kicking vigorously.
“You'll be feeling it soon yourself,” James's mother said with a twinkle in her eye. “Two grandchildren in half a year eh, we're certainly going to be busy.”
“I can imagine you'll be called on quite a lot,” Lee’s mother said. “Especially as her sister and I don't live quite so close.”
“It's not that far, mum,” said Lee. “You'll be seeing us and this baby all the time, I promise you.” Tina Davis smiled; it seemed that was what she wanted to hear. And Lee knew that she would do everything in her power to make sure this child knew both sets of grandparents well. Her relationship with her grandparents had been one of the defining things in her childhood and she certainly wasn't going to stop her child having that strong, lasting bond if she could help it.
Chapter 17
&n
bsp; “Well,” James said as they curled up together on the sofa later that day, mounds of washing up in the kitchen forgotten for now. “I think that went alright, don't you?”
Lee nodded. “Yeah, definitely less painful than I expected.”
“What was up with your mum in the kitchen?” asked James. Lee stifled a yawn.
“It's a long story,” she said, “but basically she feels I've left her out of everything and if I'm honest with myself, she's got a point.”
James combed his fingers through Lee’s hair, taking care not to catch them on any little tangles. “Lee, it's been a tough few months - it's been a crazy few months. Don't be too hard on yourself.”
His girlfriend sighed next to him; he could feel, rather than see the emotion within her. “I know, but I think I really hurt her. I'm going to try and go and see her next month, spend some time with her, show her I don't hide everything from her until last minute.”
“That sounds like a good plan,” James said. “And it won't be that long until Janet has her baby, then maybe we can get a bit of hands-on practice before we have our own!”
“That definitely sounds like a good plan,” Lee said. “I don't know about you but my experience with babies is pretty limited!”
James laughed, and Lee could feel the movement beneath her. “I've got a couple of cousins who are younger than me but that's about it. Certainly no recent experience I'm afraid to tell you! We’ll just have to figure it out together.”
***
The next day as Lee dressed for work, she eschewed the loose-fitting and floaty tops that she'd been picking out recently and instead went for something a little tighter fitting. She knew that, at the moment, her baby bump could easily be mistaken for her just having put on a little weight but she didn't care - she didn't need to hide it anymore. She was happy and the people who needed to know knew that she and James were going to have a baby. If anyone asked now, she would be honest and tell them.
Before her mum had left the night before, she'd given her a copy of the scan and it had almost sent her usually stiff-upper-lipped mum into tears again. James's mum hadn't been able to control her emotions when she’d been given the same and had indeed cried, saying she would put it on the fridge next to the one of Janet and Jack’s baby. There’d been plenty of hugs, plenty of kisses and plenty of tears but all in all she felt it was a fairly successful first big family dinner. She was fairly sure, what with James’ lovely home and the nature of his family, that it would not be the last such occasion - especially since by next Christmas there would be two new babies in the family. That was a strange thought. Christmas was Lee’s favourite time of the year; a magical time, a time definitely for family. She knew that for quite some time James had been hosting Christmas dinner at his house with all his family. Would they do that this year? With a two-month-old baby? Not to mention his brother's child. She found herself hoping that they would. The Davis family had never really had big family Christmases, especially since Lee’s dad had left. It had generally just been the three of them: her, her mum and Beth.
Imagining a large family gathered around the table with presents and crackers and hats and children made Lee feel warm inside.
***
Gina was keen, once she reached the cafe, to know how the meal had gone, but there wasn't an awful lot of time to chat. What with them being closed the day before and this being a bank holiday, most people were off from work and so there was a steady stream of customers keen to get out, explore the town and catch up with family and friends - not to mention a healthy dose of holidaymakers (although, unfortunately for them, the weather had been less than clement.) Between serving, she managed to fill Gina in on most of the big events - her mother's upset, the need to vomit in the middle of dinner and the fact that everyone had, in the end, seemed quite excited.
“So,” Gina said as she cleaned the coffee machine for the fifth time that day after it had once again become covered in milk and coffee grounds. “I guess you'll be moving out then.” She didn't look so upset this time and Lee felt that she could be honest with her, even in the crowded cafe.
“I will be,” she said, “but I wanted to talk to you about it first. I don't want to leave you in the lurch - I never wanted to, even when I thought I might be moving back to Bristol. But I hope you understand it's the right thing to do. If James and I are going to raise this child together it doesn't really make sense to do it from two separate homes. Let alone all the practicalities of having two of everything we’ll need.”
Gina sighed. “I know. I was being irrational the other day and I'm sorry - of course you're going to move in there and I know you wouldn't leave me high and dry. I'll be okay; after all, the money I'm making here is more regular than it ever was before and once you've had the baby, I guess I'll be taking on more hours here anyway.”
Lee laughed; “I'm not even sure how you’d do that,” she said. “You already work most hours under the sun! But when you're taking sole responsibility - which I guess you will be when I'm off on maternity leave - then you'll definitely be able to earn some more money. I'll make sure of it.”
Gina nodded. “I was wondering if I might be able to afford to live without a flatmate. You see, I've never lived on my own. It might be nice for a change.”
“Charming!” exclaimed Lee said with a laugh and Gina gave her a gentle shove.
“Oh shut up you,” she said. “You know I don't mean it like that. But I'm a grown woman in her twenties and maybe now's the time to find out what living on my own is like. You never know, I might meet someone and end up not living alone for very long - after all, apparently love comes quickly in Totnes!”
Lee giggled. “Apparently it does. Are you really okay with it then?”
Gina nodded. “I'll miss you, I won't lie - I’ll really miss having you around. I've never got on with somebody I lived with so well before to be honest and - well, I know this might sound a bit funny but it was like having a sister. But you know, one that you actually get on with.”
Lee laughed; “No, I know exactly what you mean. I've never been so close to a friend before - not had someone I would tell everything to. It's nice not to just stay in my own head; I’ll really miss that.”
“But,” Gina said, “if you think I'm going to be up in the middle of the night changing dirty nappies and taking a crying baby off your hands you've got another thing coming, I'm afraid - and I would guess that James probably will do those things, so he's probably your best bet. Plus I'm sure he is amazing in bed!”
“Gina!” Lee exclaimed. “You can’t just randomly say that in the middle of a packed cafe!” She glanced around to see if anyone looked like they had overhead. “But you may well be right!”
Both women dissolved into peals of laughter, causing a few of the customers to glance around at them. Most, however, just smiled at the sight of two women having such a good time doing their job and turned back to their coffees without a word.
It was then that the door opened, the bell rang and Val stepped inside. “Val!” exclaimed Lee, the laughter infecting her mood. “Lovely to see you again, and thanks again for dinner the other night - it was fantastic.”
“Not a problem at all, dear, it was the least I could do after the help you gave to me and Shelly. It made a world of difference that did, and thank you for getting it back to us so quickly.”
“It's fine. I'd like to think no one was deliberately misleading her but it certainly was a very woolly will - it wouldn't have stood up to any scrutiny at all.”
“Exactly what I thought,” said Val. “Anyway, at least it's sorted now. Everyone knows where they stand. Did you have a nice Easter?” she asked.
“Lovely,” said Lee truthfully. It was not a holiday she'd ever particularly celebrated, but having a big family meal had certainly made it more of an occasion - let alone the sharing of her news. “We had my family and James's family round at James's for Sunday lunch,” she said. She knew that James's mum and Val spoke somet
imes and she wondered if Val already knew the news - but she didn't show any signs of it.
“That sounds splendid,” Val said. “Any special occasion, or just for Easter?” Lee didn't know if she was imagining things but she was sure that Val’s eyes glanced at her growing stomach, despite the difference only being minimal at this point. She only debated her answer for half a second.
“Well,” she said with a grin, “it was a special occasion actually, and now I've told them, I can tell you. James and I are having a baby.”
“How exciting!” Val gave her a hug across the counter. “What amazing news! Oh, congratulations Lee, and congratulations to James too - please tell him if I don't see him. Oh I bet his mother was over the moon.”
Lee smiled; “I think so, especially with his brother and sister-in-law expecting too. Two grandchildren in the space of a few months - it's crazy.”
“Ah, I can picture it now. Your hair, James's eyes - that's going to be one pretty baby if you don’t mind me saying! You've made my day with that news Lee, you really have. Happiness couldn't have happened to two nicer people. And if you need a babysitter you know where I am!”
The South West Series Box Set Page 30
