by Marie Force
I kiss my way down the front of her, taking my own sweet time even as the fire burns so hot inside me, I fear I might combust from the heat that threatens to consume me. She fists a handful of my hair as I open her to my tongue, moaning against her flesh. I want to devour her, to show her what she means to me, to make her so happy she won’t ever want or need anything—or anyone—else. I lick and suck and tease her into a series of orgasms that have her crying out from the pleasure. I keep it up until I can’t wait another second to be inside her.
She’s so hot and so tight that I hold still for a long moment, until I’m sure this won’t end too soon.
I look down to find her gazing up at me, her eyes conveying her every emotion, and I realize that I’m making love for the first time in my life.
“Ellie,” I whisper as I thrust into her. “You… This…”
“I know,” she says. “I know.” She wraps her arms and legs around me, holding me close.
I’m at home in her arms, and I never want to leave. I’ll do whatever it takes to have her, to have this. It’s everything. Nothing else matters, and knowing that, I’m free to take the next step, to do what I should’ve done years ago.
Tomorrow. I’ll start the ball rolling, and to hell with the consequences. I’m going to have her and our child. I’m going to have it all. No matter what.
I’m so exhausted from the amazing night with Ellie that I’m late to the Friday morning partners’ meeting. Not by much, but enough to draw the ire of Hayden and Kristian, who greet me with matching glares. I couldn’t care less. I’m high on life and love today, and there’s just about nothing anyone could say or do to ruin my buzz.
“Thanks for joining us,” Hayden says, clearly still pissed at me about last night.
“My pleasure.” I help myself to coffee, a muffin and fresh fruit from the spread that Addie arranges for our partner meetings. She says that food puts us in a good mood, and the rest of the team benefits from keeping the partners in a good mood. “What’s on the agenda today?”
“Flynn has an update on Natalie’s project.”
Part of me is surprised that Flynn wants to bring his wife’s story to the big screen. He’s so intensely private, but after her story was made public, they don’t have many secrets left—and it is an insane story that will make for one hell of a film.
“We have a screenplay in the works,” Flynn reports, updating us on the details of the writer he’s hired.
“I feel sort of sorry for this guy, and I haven’t even met him yet,” Marlowe jokes. “He’s got a big job ahead of him.”
“Ha-ha,” Flynn says, grinning at her. “He’s more than up to the task. Nat likes him, which is all I care about. As long as she’s comfortable, I’m comfortable.”
“I’m sure you’re very comfortable these days,” Hayden says.
“Likewise, my friend,” Flynn says, “which brings me to the next item on the agenda—you monopolizing my assistant.”
“I do love to monopolize her,” Hayden replies with a dopey, lovesick grin that makes us all laugh. The change in him since he fell for Addie is nothing short of astonishing. He’s completely transformed by love, and in the best possible way. No one deserves it more than he does after a childhood marked by nonstop family drama.
“Seriously, though,” Flynn says, “you gotta let her work sometimes. I need her.”
“Not as much as I do, and you don’t get to need her between six p.m. and six a.m. unless it’s something arranged in advance. Her days of being your twenty-four-hours-a-day beck-and-call girl are over.”
“I’m only going to let you get away with calling her that because she’s so happy.”
“Gee, thanks,” Hayden says drolly. “You get twelve hours. I get twelve hours. That’s how this is gonna go. Got me?”
“Yeah, yeah, but you’d better play nice. I really, really need her.”
“So do I.”
Having Hayden come right out and say that is huge. Before Addie, he wouldn’t have said he needed anything or anyone. I’m humbled by his confession, especially in light of what transpired last night. It gives me the push I need to lay myself bare to my partners.
“I have something for the agenda.”
“That’s a first,” Kristian says dryly, grinning at me.
“First time for everything. And it’s kind of a big deal. I don’t want any of you to be offended that I haven’t told you this before now.”
“You’ve certainly got our attention,” Flynn says, sitting back in his chair in a pose that’s deceptively casual.
In for a penny… “Have you heard of Henry Kingsley?”
“The British tycoon?” Marlowe asks.
“Yeah, him.”
“What about him?” Hayden asks.
“He’s… Well, he’s my father.”
The announcement is met with stunned silence that lasts long enough to become uncomfortable. I break it with a rush of words that lay out the dilemma that is my life. And when I’m done, they stare at me as if they’re seeing me for the very first time.
“You gotta be fucking kidding me,” Hayden says, breaking a long silence.
“I wish I was.”
“Wait, so you wish that you weren’t a billionaire heir to a massive fortune?” Marlow asks.
“Yes, I wish that! I want nothing to do with it. I want this, here, with all of you. This is my life. Quantum is my life. Not that. Never that.”
“Jesus, Jasper,” Kristian whispers. As my closest friend among the group, I expected him to be the most affected by this news. “How did we never know this?”
“No one knows that Jasper Kingsley and Jasper Autry are the same person. At least no one knew until now. I’ve gone to enormous lengths to keep my two lives very separate. The British press thinks I’m an eccentric inventor, living on my father’s country estate in Cornwall, still trying to pull off my first big patent.”
“So you’re part of the aristocracy,” Marlowe says, her eyes big with wonder. If only she knew that there’s nothing wonderful about the reality of it, at least not for me. “Like on Downton Abbey!”
“I’m actually a marquess and future duke.”
“Shut the fuck up,” Hayden says. “Even I know what that means.”
“Well, I don’t,” Flynn says. “Fill in the blanks for me.”
“It means that when my father dies, which he’s apt to do sooner rather than later thanks to his recent penchant for testing his limits, I’ll be required to go home to London and take over the family business as well as the dukedom, whether I want to or not. And I most definitely do not want to.”
“Oh jeez,” Marlowe says. “We can’t let that happen.”
“No way,” Flynn adds. “We can’t lose you.”
“I don’t want to be lost, but turning my back on my legacy, my responsibilities… If I actually do that, it’d be a huge scandal at home—and probably here, too. It might reflect badly on Quantum, and honestly, that’s giving me pause.”
“Don’t let it,” Hayden says fiercely. “You do what you’ve got to do to get yourself out of this. We’re behind you three thousand percent.”
The others nod in agreement, which makes my throat feel tight. Hayden’s support, in particular, is overwhelming in light of what he witnessed last night at Black Vice. I was afraid things would be weird between us today, but thankfully that hasn’t been the case. However, I still hope he doesn’t mention to Flynn that I took Ellie to the club. I’d rather not have to explain what we were doing there to her brother. In a perfect world, he’ll never know we were there.
“I agree with Hayden,” Flynn says. “You’re one of us, and you always will be. You let us know what we can do to support you. Anything you need.”
Christ, they’re going to make me bawl like a wee babe. “Thank you,” I say in a hushed tone. “I’m going to talk to some people at home about my options and go from there. I also want to talk to my sister, who’d be the ideal choice to inherit my father’s busine
ss. Perhaps she and I could share the duties or something. I don’t know yet, but there has to be a way, and I’m determined to find it.”
I can’t tell them the real reason I’m so determined. Not until Ellie is ready to tell her family about us—and the baby we hope to have. For now, I’m keeping the two things separate and dealing with them one at a time.
First on the agenda is contending with my father, a thought that turns my stomach. But then I remember the nearly religious experience of making love to Ellie, and I’m filled with determination. I know now what I need to do, and as soon as this meeting is over, I’ll get the ball rolling.
I’m long overdue to take control of my life, and being with Ellie has given me the courage I’ve lacked in the past. It’s given me a reason that even my illustrious career couldn’t give me to extricate myself from the nightmare I’ve been saddled with my entire life. If I stay focused on the future I want with her and our child—or children—I can do what needs to be done.
“Keep us posted,” Flynn says.
“Thank you. I will.” That’s all I’m capable of saying at the moment.
“And here I thought I’d be the one stirring the pot this morning,” Kristian says.
“How so?” Marlowe asks.
“I wanted to talk to you guys about the club. Only a few of us seem to hang out there anymore. We’re paying Sebastian to run it for us, and we’re not using it.”
“I’ll admit that I’m guilty of avoiding the club now that Nat and I are married,” Flynn says. “She’s not a fan of public displays.”
“So you’re out.” Turning to Hayden, Kristian says, “What about you?”
“Addie prefers to keep our private life and her work life separate.”
“Can’t say I blame her,” Marlowe says.
“What’s your excuse?” Kristian asks Mo. “You’re still single, and I never see you there anymore either.”
“I’m not sure exactly,” Marlowe replies hesitantly. “Lately, I’ve been sort of… I don’t know… bored with the whole scene.”
Astounded by her confession, we stare at her.
“Bored?” Flynn asks. “For real?”
I can understand his disbelief. Marlowe has been, without a doubt, the most enthusiastic practitioner of the group. To hear she’s bored with the lifestyle is shocking, to say the least.
“What’s that about?” Hayden asks.
“I don’t know,” Marlowe replies, looking a little lost. “Lately, they’re all the same. There’s no challenge to it anymore. They just want to be dominated by the lady movie star. They don’t make me work for it the way they used to.” She shrugs. “Thus the boredom.”
“I understand what you mean, Mo.” I empathize with her because I do get it. Before I had Ellie, I too had become somewhat disenchanted with the same-shit-different-night life I’d been living. “It does become less exciting with partners who are a little too willing to submit.”
“Yeah, that’s what I mean. I haven’t given up entirely, but I’m taking a break.”
“So that leaves us with a very expensive club that none of us are using,” Kristian says. “I want to suggest that we make it public.” Holding up his hands to ward off the barrage of dissent, he adds, “Exclusive but public. Rather than inviting people to come to the club as our guests, we handpick members, and we continue to make it the best-kept secret in Hollywood.”
“I don’t know,” Hayden says, expressing the same reservations I’m feeling. We’ve been very lucky up to now that no one has caught wind of the fact that all five of the Quantum principals are BDSM aficionados. Each of us is well aware that as high-profile celebrities, we’re playing with fire by partaking in something most people would find scandalous, but we’ve chosen to do it anyway because we can’t not partake in a lifestyle that brings us pleasure. Club Quantum in LA and New York has given us a safe place to participate with our closest friends in the lifestyle without fear of being found out. The club in New York has been open to outside members for a while now, but the LA club has been much more locked down.
“Letting in outsiders is definitely a risk,” I say, “but with us spending less time there, the risk is also lessened.”
Flynn nods in agreement. “That’s true. If none of us are regulars anymore, then we have nothing to worry about.”
“Other than the fact that the club is housed in our building and named for our company,” Hayden says.
“Well, there is that,” Marlowe concedes.
“I don’t think that should stop us from going forward with a membership program,” Flynn says. “Anyone who’s admitted should have the same skin in the game that we have. People in this town, for the most part, prefer to keep their personal lives private. They aren’t going to talk about us, and we’re not going to talk about them.”
“Still,” Kristian says, “it is a risk that we all need to be aware that we’re taking.”
“Understood,” I say, and the others agree.
“In that case,” Kristian proceeds, handing out stapled pages to each of us, “Sebastian has come up with a plan to open up the club to new members. If you guys could take a look at this and get me any feedback by the end of next week, I’d appreciate it.”
“Will do.” I glance at my watch and see that it’s already eleven. I’ve got stuff to do, and the day is getting away from me. “Is that it?”
“That’s all I have,” Kristian says.
“Watch for an email update on the project about Nat’s story,” Flynn says. “We’re getting close on a few things.”
“I predict this amazing film is going to be another Camouflage,” Marlowe says, referring to the film we all won Oscars for this year.
“That’d be something, wouldn’t it?” Flynn asks with a goofy grin. He’s so lovesick over his adorable wife, and her astonishing courage has been an inspiration to us all.
“I can’t wait to work on that one,” I say as I get up to leave the room. “Sign me up.”
Flynn gives me a fist bump as I walk by him on the way out. “Thanks, buddy.”
I hope I’ll still be his buddy when he finds out that not only am I fucking his sister every chance I get, but I’m trying to make a baby with her, too.
Chapter 15
In my office, I call my father’s longtime assistant, Nathan, to confirm that Henry will be in his London office tomorrow morning. Saturdays have always been my father’s favorite day to work when the rest of the office is deserted and quiet, so it doesn’t surprise me that he’ll be there. Nathan confirms it’s his last day in the office before he leaves on his latest quest for publicity and thrills.
Next, I arrange for a private jet to take me to London later today. As an environmental advocate, I’m not a big fan of private planes when it’s just me, but in this case, time is of the essence in light of my baby-making plans with Ellie. Calculating the time difference, I make it so I’ll be back in time to meet up with her at Flynn’s tomorrow night, and then she’s all mine for the next week. I can’t wait.
Now that I’ve made a decision I should’ve made years ago, I feel incredibly serene and determined. Before I had Ellie to encourage and support me, I would’ve been freaking out at the thought of seeing my father, let alone telling him that he’ll have to find someone else to run his business after he dies because it’s not going to be me.
“I’m sorry, Father,” I say out loud, practicing. “I respect and admire the business you and Grandfather built, but finance is not in my blood. I’d be the worst possible person to take the helm after you’re gone, and I’m sure you’d prefer to leave the business to someone who actually knows what he or she is doing. You should talk to Gwen. She’d be fantastic, and I think she might actually want to do it.”
I pause to consider that last part. I can’t say that about wanting to do it. He’s never cared what I wanted. Saying that will only open me up to yet another lecture about duty, obligation and responsibility. I can almost hear what he’d have to say to that: �
�Do you think Prince William and his pretty wife want to go to all those ribbon cuttings? They do it because he understands his responsibility to history.”
Prince William is a better man than I am. So too is his brother, Prince Harry. No question about it. I couldn’t live the way they do, in the giant fishbowl with my every move scrutinized by reporters assigned to cover me. I’d go mad. Though I’ve enjoyed some fame thanks to my work in the film business and my association with Flynn, Hayden, Marlowe and Kristian, for the most part I’m left alone to live my life, with only the occasional picture showing up in the celebrity rags. I’m a low-level celebrity compared to them, and I like it that way.
I have no earthly idea how they can stand the paparazzi, who pursue them so relentlessly. The firestorm that ensued after Flynn met Natalie is a classic example of the kind of thing that would take me right over the cliff. Her painful past was laid bare for the world to consume, as if they had some sort of right to it. It’s a disgusting part of celebrity, one I’m more than happy to avoid.
Hayden carefully managed the announcement of his engagement to Addie, and the betrothal of one of Hollywood’s most notorious bachelors was the talk of the town for the last week. But he’s gone out of his way to keep her sheltered from the storm, even going so far as to put extra security on duty at the office and at his homes in the city and in Malibu.
With the details of my trip seen to, I turn my attention to work, knowing I’ll be out of the office more than in it over the next week. We’re gearing up for the shoot of a new action film in Europe this summer, and I’ve just received the final script and director’s notes from Hayden. I spend the rest of the afternoon lost in the new story and thinking about how we’ll capture the various scenes on film.
The advance work is one of my favorite parts of the job, even more so than the actual shoot. It’s at this stage that my creativity comes into play as I add my suggestions to Hayden’s notes. We’ll go back and forth a hundred times before we actually shoot, and the collaborative process with him has taken on a recognizable rhythm after working together for so many years.
