by Lili Zander
They load him on an automated stretcher and transfer him to the only hospital on Noturn. There, the healer injects him with a clear solution, and then immerses him in a healing tank.
God, I hate hospitals. They bring back memories I’d rather shove to the background. It’s the vaguely antiseptic smell that triggers me the most, part cleaning solution and part the acrid, coppery tang of blood. Human blood. My blood.
The healing tank doesn’t hold pleasant associations either. I hated them when I was immersed into one at the Rebellion, and I hate it now.
“People affected by resonance sickness feel like their brains are being squeezed in a vice,” the healer explains. “Their blood pressure rises to dangerous levels. Our scientists have developed a temporary solution. I just injected your bondmate with a dose of cranisum. It will take the pressure off temporarily.”
Danek has tubes snaking out of his nose and mouth. His eyes are still closed, and if he’s aware of what’s going on, he gives no sign. Lazy sparks travel through the gelatinous solution. The healers back at the Rebellion tried to explain the sparks to me. Something about the body’s built-in electricity, blah blah blah. From experience, I know that when the sparks connect with skin, they send a jolt through you. I can still feel them on my body.
He looks so helpless. He looks like he’s never going to wake up again.
And I can’t take it. I want to be brave for him. But I can’t. I can’t stand it. Bile fills my mouth, and I escape, lurching outside, and lose the contents of my stomach into a nearby bush.
Danek is immersed in a healing tank, fighting for his life. I should go back inside. He was there for me in the dark times. He was the light at the end of the tunnel. He was the lifeline I clung to to keep from drowning.
But I cannot. I command my legs to walk into the hospital, but they have turned to jelly. They will not obey. My fear is a solid wall, and though Danek’s on the other side, I can’t penetrate it.
She’s a liability, he’d said. He was right.
I’ve never felt more useless. I’ve never felt more like a failure.
14
Naomi
After about an hour, the scientist emerges outside. Her gaze rests on me, and I swear I can see judgment in her eyes. I can hear the questions she’s asking herself. What sort of wife doesn’t even care that her husband is in hospital? What sort of wife hovers outside, too terrified to go inside? What sort of wife isn’t there when her husband needs her?
“Is Danek…” My voice trails off. I can’t finish the thought.
“He is still unconscious, but we’ve given him a shot of cranisum, and his condition is stable.” She nods in the direction of a bench. “Let’s sit. My name is Kenia ab Cindifin.”
“Naomi Knoll.” I let myself be led to the seat. “What is happening to Danek? Will he be okay?”
She sits down, tucking her indigo robes around her. “The resonance sickness will not cause permanent damage,” she responds carefully. “However, there is a complication.”
My heart lurches. “A complication?”
Kenia draws in a breath. “You must understand something about Noturn,” she replies. “No Zorahn can last more than three months on this planet without losing their mind. That’s true for everyone. It’s true for the administrator, it’s true for the security guards that the House hires, and it’s true for Sidrx and me.”
“Okay.” She might have said that the resonance sickness doesn’t cause permanent damage, but she also said that Danek is still unconscious, and I’m struggling to maintain any semblance of calm.
“Despite that, or maybe because of it, we’ve developed a robust record-keeping system,” she continues. “Here’s what we’ve learned. The resonance sickness is very highly correlated to failing the Testing.” Her voice softens. “I heard that the two of you are newly bonded. I’m so, so, sorry.”
My heart clenches reflexively, and then my brain finally decides to start to work. Kenia is not expressing sympathy because Danek is dying. She’s expressing sympathy because he’s Draekon. To the citizens of the High Empire, failing the Testing is a fate worse than death.
Hang on a minute. That’s not all she said. What were her precise words? The resonance sickness is very highly correlated to failing the Testing. She’s telling me that Danek is sick because he’s Draekon.
Oh shit.
How could the Rebellion have missed this? How could they not have realized that Danek would be incapacitated on Noturn? If we get out of here in one piece, remind me to kill Dariux.
I don’t have to pretend to look dismayed. “What?”
“I’m so sorry,” she repeats.
“Are you sure? Absolutely sure?”
Kenia nods. “Your bondmate has the strongest reaction to Noturn that we’ve ever recorded. His concentration of Draekon genes is incredibly high.”
No doubt.
“His genes also seem mutated,” she adds.
Once again, not a surprise. However, she’s wrong about this. It’s not Danek’s genes that are mutated; it’s everyone else’s. Danek is pure, one-hundred-percent, unadulterated Draekon.
Right now, none of that matters. I feel a sudden need to see him. Jumping to my feet, I rush into the hospital. I’m hoping against hope that he’s up and about, but no, he’s still unconscious. “When will he wake up?” I ask Kenia, my voice tinged with desperation. “When will he be well enough to leave?”
“I don’t know,” she replies. “Most people recover in a week or two, at least enough to leave the healing tanks. But nobody has ever had such a strong reaction to the planet. It’s impossible to tell what could happen. He might regain consciousness sometime in the next three months. He might not. But everyone always recovers once they leave the planet.”
I gape at her. “In that case, what are you waiting for? Why can’t you get him on the shuttle?”
“Because it’s full,” she replies. “The five hundred miners that are currently on Noturn need to leave before the planet impacts them permanently.”
“You’re telling me there’s not enough room for one more person?”
“That’s exactly what I’m telling you. Shuttle runs are expensive. The cargo holds are filled with rihim and the passenger section runs at peak capacity. Nobody can be evacuated early. All of this was in your employment contract and in the Noturn entry paperwork.”
Which I signed without reading. Not that reading it would have made a difference—none of us predicted that this would have happened to Danek.
Think, Naomi. There has to be a way out. “What if we paid for a private shuttle?” I’m sure that if I contacted Danek’s brothers, they’d be here in an instant. “Nothing is more important than Danek’s safety.”
Kenia stares at me. “You’re really naïve, aren’t you? Do you have any idea what private shuttles cost? The amount is more than your bondmate could earn in a lifetime.”
Oops. I did not know that.
The scientist throws the healer a glance. “Sidrx, can you give us a moment?”
“Sure.” Giving me an encouraging smile, the man leaves the room.
Once the door shuts behind him, Kenia activates a cone of silence. “You’re undoubtedly in shock,” she says. “I don’t blame you. House Cindifin does not share data with the High Empire, but that does not matter. Your bondmate will test positive.” She looks around reflexively, even though we’re alone. “There are alternatives to exile. There are underground services that will extract your bondmate to safety. Several people claim they have a route to the Rebellion, but most of them are scammers, preying on people’s desperation. But I have a reliable contact that will get him out.” She gives me a searching look. “And you as well, if you choose to leave with your bondmate.”
Is she saying what I think she is? “Why are you helping us?”
Her expression darkens. “We conduct the Testing because it’s supposedly the only way to keep us safe. But that’s a convenient lie that we’ve told ourselves. In a t
housand years, there have been no Draekons capable of transforming into dragons. The gene has mutated, and I doubt the transformation is even possible.”
It’s definitely possible, and I’ve seen it with my own eyes, but I don’t contradict her.
“We ruin the lives of those that fail the Testing, and to what purpose?” She shakes her head grimly. “The Testing might be the law of the land, but I don’t support it. We are scientists. The data shows that Draekons are functionally extinct. Rather than letting the data guide us, we have allowed ourselves to be ruled by fear.” She leans forward, her expression earnest. “He’s going to test positive, Naomi. He will be taken from you, and he will be exiled for the rest of his life. If you want to run, let me know, and I will alert my contact.”
I don’t know how to answer her. I glance at Danek. “This isn’t a decision I can make on my own,” I murmur. “Not now. Not when Danek is still unconscious.”
“Of course.” She gives me a sad smile. “It’s a lot to take in. Your quarters are prepared. Why don’t you go there, settle in, take a warm bath, eat a hot meal, and get some rest? We’ll take good care of Danek ab Usora.”
No. The prospect of leaving the hospital sounds amazing, and a shower sounds magical. And maybe if I cuddled my floofs, I would feel better.
But I can’t leave Danek. I won’t.
I wish I knew what to do.
Behind me, alarms start to beep. I turn around, and just as I do, Danek opens his eyes. For a second, he doesn’t appear to know where he is, and then awareness floods in. He disconnects the wires and the tubes holding him, and then, he vaults out of the healing tank.
We both jump to our feet. “You shouldn’t be up so quickly,” Kenia gasps, staring at the readings on her screens. “This is impossible. I don’t understand.”
“The headache is gone,” Danek responds. “I’m fine.” He turns to me. “Sorry for the scare, Naomi.”
I want to pinch myself. I want to laugh and cry and wrap my arms around him and never let go. “Are you okay?”
He nods. He holds his hand out to me. “Want to get out of here?”
The scientist splutters something, but I’m not listening to her. Profound gladness fills me. “Yeah, let’s do that.”
I lace my hand in his warm one. I’m trembling all over. I’d been terrified that Danek would never wake up. I’d been terrified that I would never see him alive again.
Life is short and can be snuffed out in an instant. I learned that lesson when Will died young, and I’m learning it anew. Nothing is guaranteed to us. I might not have a tomorrow. And if I run out of time, I don’t want to be steeped in regret.
Danek said he was attracted to me. I’m a wreck. It’s a bad idea. I know nothing permanent is going to come of it, but if he expresses interest again, I’m going to take him up on it. I’m going to sleep with him.
15
Danek
You have to hand it to the Supreme Mother. She built us to be invulnerable. A few hours ago, the pain had been crushing. I thought I might die. Now, the pressure has eased. I still don't feel right, but the oppressive agony is gone. I can function.
Naomi keeps throwing me assessing glances as we take a skimmer back to our assigned quarters. “You remember Resi? The miner we were talking to at the terminal? She said she’d take care of our luggage.”
“She’s saddled with the three floofs? That’s unfortunate for Resi.”
She laughs. “Hopefully, she didn't open the cage,” she quips. “If she did, the three monsters have already wrecked the place.”
“Look on the bright side. They might have fallen asleep.”
She throws me another sideways look. “Are you sure you're alright?”
“Absolutely,” I reply, lying through my teeth. “You know our history. We were created to be the perfect soldier. Can't let a little thing like some magnetic vibrations mess with my ability to perform.”
A smile plays about her lips. “No,” she agrees. “We can't let that happen. What would happen to your reputation if people knew that the big bad Draekon could be taken down by some planetary vibrations?”
I think I’ve convinced her that everything is fine. But that’s not true. The crushing pressure in my skull might have eased for the moment, but I'm sure it will be back, and when it does, I fear it might return with a vengeance. The second time around, recovery won’t be quite this quick.
I need answers. I need to talk to the others.
“Oh, there’s something you should know,” Naomi says. “The scientist, Kenia, knows you’re Draekon.”
I go still. “She does? How?”
“She said that they'd done studies. Everyone who succumbed to the resonance sickness always ended up failing the Testing.” She turns to look at me. “She also told me that she had a contact that would help us escape to the Rebellion, if that's what we wanted.”
“She did? That’s interesting.” Kenia ab Cindifin is a reasonably high-ranked member of the House of Cindifin. The Rebellion might have more allies in the High Empire then we believe. I make a mental note to mention the exchange to Tarish.
“Is that a problem? That she knows?”
“I'll get Ruhan to monitor her comms,” I assure her. “If she tries to tell anyone what she discovered, he can intercept the message, and then I can take care of it.”
She wrinkles her nose. “By killing her?”
I hope it doesn't come down to it. “My options are limited,” I say, avoiding a direct answer. “Noturn’s air is poisonous to us. We’re inside a sealed dome. Here, I cannot transform into a dragon. I cannot breathe fire. If the dome is breached, and the atmosphere pours in, everyone will die.”
A fresh wave of guilt washes over me. I shouldn't have brought Naomi along on this mission. What was I thinking? Yes, she wanted to come, but I should have still forbidden it. Yes, I wanted to see her get better, and I wanted to spend time with her. But it's still a risk, one I shouldn’t have taken.
“I liked her,” Naomi says unexpectedly. “She didn't have to offer to help, but she did.”
“You would prefer that I don't hurt her?”
“Yes,” she says. “I would.”
“Then consider it done. If she talks, I’ll find a different way to keep her quiet.”
She raises an eyebrow. “You’d do that for me?”
That, and so much more. She only has to ask. “My reputation tends to precede me, but I don't enjoy killing. Some people, like the scientists that tortured you, deserve to die. But in general, murder is not an option I turn to, not if I have any other choice.”
We arrive at our destination, a long, low house. Plants grow on the flat roof, and a public park stretches in front of us, with an artificial lake in the middle, fountains of water shooting into the sky.
Domes come in standard sizes. I’ve been in all kinds—the crowded, squalid ones, the ones that are plasteel and glass jungles, nary a plant in sight. The Noturn domes are about the most spacious, airy, and welcoming ones I’ve seen, and they’re cleverly designed. Trees, bushes, and shrubs provide natural filtration. The water dampens the resonance. The environment is both beautiful and practical.
“This is nice,” Naomi exclaims. “I have to be honest—this isn’t what I imagined a mining planet would look like.”
“Me neither,” I reply. I wonder if this is the work of Director Lashi’vi. The Cindifin Fourthborn has never set foot on Noturn—it’s too much of a risk—but the settlement nonetheless bears her touch.
We enter the house. The front door opens into a long rectangular space. In the front of the house is the kitchen and a living space. In the back is a large refresher and an even larger bedroom.
The floofs are in the living space, still in their cage. Smart move by Resi. As soon as we walk in, they shriek, hoot, and chitter indignantly, letting us know how badly they’ve been treated, and lamenting about their suffering.
I roll my eyes at the fuss they make. Naomi, who has a softer heart than me, let
s them out. Predictably, they bound off in three separate directions, ready to inflict maximum chaos.
I want to stay with Naomi. Watch her snuggle the three monsters. Walk through the house and watch her discover its features.
But I'm acutely aware that I'm on borrowed time. “I need to talk to the others,” I murmur. “Will you excuse me for a few minutes?”
“By others, do you mean Sixth? He’s a scientist, isn’t he? Are you going to get a second opinion on what happened to you?”
She's pretty perceptive. “Yes.”
She flashes me a blinding smile. “Good.” Then her expression grows serious. “Watching you faint was the scariest thing ever. I really don't want to have to go through it again.”
The scariest thing ever? The rogue scientist tortured her for months on end, and she withstood it with courage. And she’s afraid of me fainting? I don't know how to respond to that.
“I'll make sure it doesn't happen again.”
She laughs. “You’re going to will yourself better? If anyone can do it, Danek, it’d be you.”
A door from the bedroom leads to a small, screened-in porch. The floofs haven’t discovered it yet, so I make my way there, shut the door, and activate a cone of silence around me. Then I comm my brothers.
They immediately shimmer into existence around me. Kadir wears a frown on his face. Someone who doesn’t know him as well as I do might think he’s annoyed, but I know better. Kadir is anxious. “You landed over three hours ago,” he says tersely. “You were supposed to check in as soon as you touched down. What happened?”
“You worry too much,” I reply lightly. “Did anyone ever tell you that?”
Sixth comes closer to me and stares at my face for a long instant. “Your color doesn't look right. Something is wrong.”
Kashrn. I was hoping to lead up to this in a way that wouldn’t cause them to panic, but it's too late for that. “I had something of an extreme reaction to Noturn,” I say lightly. “The moment I got out of the shuttle, it felt like my head was being squeezed in a vice. There was an overwhelming amount of pressure.”
