by Katie Ashley
The flashing lights faded in the distance as I stood alone in the driveway. The sound of a commotion behind me caused me to turn around. The officers were dragging Bruce out of the house. His hands were cuffed behind him, and he was railing obscenities about the police and about Annie and Zach.
But when he saw me, he stopped struggling against them. He turned white as a sheet, staring at me in disbelief. As they put him in the back of the cruiser, he cast one last glance my way before turning dumbly to stare ahead.
I then started the slow walk home. Both my mind and my heart were overwhelmed. One scene played over and over in my mind. It was look on Zach’s face when he saw my true self.
When I got to the house, I didn’t know what to expect from the others. Would they be angry I’d revealed my true self, or would they understand? My hand hovered over the doorknob. Shakily, I turned it.
The moment I walked in the door, Sophie rushed at me, gathering me into her arms. “Are you all right?”
My head bobbed weakly as I was zapped of all my energy.
Elijah and Rafe appeared at my side. “We were so worried about you, Cassie!” Elijah exclaimed.
My eyes were drawn to Gabriel who was standing behind them. I braced myself for his anger as he strode towards me. Instead, he hugged me. Squeezing me tight, he held me for a few moments before he said anything. “I’m very proud of you, Cassie,” he whispered in my ear.
I jerked back in surprise. “You are?”
“Of course I am. You weren’t left with very many options, but in the end, you managed to save Zach.”
“But he knows what I am now!” I cried.
“Yes, he does, but it doesn’t mean it’s going to compromise our mission.”
I stared at him in disbelief. “How can you be sure?”
Gabriel exchanged a look with Sophie before he continued. “After Zach goes to sleep tonight, he will have no memory of you breaking out.”
“What?” I questioned.
“Instead, the Dominion will give him a new memory that he knocked Bruce out, and you called the police.”
I gasped. “They’ll erase his memory?”
Sophie touched my arm. “Don’t think of it in a bad way, Cassie. It’s the best thing for Zach and for all of us. It’s exactly what happened with Hannah when her mother was shot. Her only memory is something caused the gun to misfire and something gave her comfort.” When she saw that I was still unwavering, she said, “It’s just the way things are done.”
My gaze flickered to Gabriel. “So if the Dominion’s wiping Zach’s memory tonight, are they angry with me with what happened?”
“As soon as it happened, I was in contact with Micah.” Gabriel ignored how I shuddered at the mention of his name. “Of course, he and the others aren’t thrilled with what happened, but they understand why you reacted the way you did.”
“What’s going to happen now?” I asked. “I mean, are they going to send me back?”
“No, Micah assured me you wouldn’t be sent away. He said it would arouse more suspicion if you were to suddenly disappear from our family and from school. Not only is there Lauren to deal with, but he says there are plenty of souls who can benefit from your help.”
I cleared my throat. “And what about Zach?”
“Well, he was never meant for you in the first place. You’ll simply keep an eye on him for any trouble looming over the horizon.”
Although I should have been overjoyed to no longer be responsible for Zach, my chest caved in at the thought of having to “just keep an eye” on him. Sophie came up and put her arm comfortingly around me. “You have to be exhausted, Cassie. Why don’t you go on upstairs and go to bed?”
“All right, I will.” I started upstairs and then turned around. “Thanks guys. I really appreciate your help and understanding.”
Gabriel smiled. “No problem.”
When I got to my room, I collapsed onto my bed. Breaking out of my human form depleted all my energy. But at the same time, I was too keyed up to sleep. Besides, every time I closed my eyes, I saw Zach’s horrified expression before me.
A gentle knock brought my attention to the door. “Come in.”
It was Sophie. She must’ve have sensed something wasn’t right with me. She eased down on the bed and gave a small smile. “I just wanted to check on you.”
“I’m okay,” I murmured, avoiding her gaze.
Sophie cleared her throat. “Um, no you’re not. I can feel your distress.”
I rubbed my eyes. “I’m just tired, that’s all. I’m sure things will look differently in the morning.”
“Things with Zach?”
My chest heaved. “Maybe.”
Sophie took my hand in hers. “By Lucius disappearing at Zach’s house, you defeated him, Cassie. And by defeating him, you should be freed of the Demon’s Kiss he put upon you.” Sophie paused to gage my expression. “But I would venture to say by the way you’re feeling, that you aren’t freed of your emotions for Zach. Am I right?”
Deep down, I didn’t want to acknowledge the depth of what I felt for Zach. But while I could lie to myself, I could never lie to Sophie, so I nodded.
“And I can further imagine as you’re lying here you’re pretty upset that you still have feelings for him, and you’re also worried that nothing will ever be the same between you because of what he knows.”
“Yes,” I croaked.
“I think those are all understandable emotions, Cass.”
Tears stung my eyes. “I just feel so jumbled up inside—like I don’t even know myself anymore. I can’t even imagine getting up in the morning with things the way they are between us!”
Sophie shook her head. “But I know you will. You’re so much stronger than you give yourself credit for, and you’re a much better guardian than you’ll admit to.”
I snorted. “Yeah, I’ve really done a bang up job. I’ve even alerted to a human to our presence.”
“You’re not the first guardian to do that, and you won’t be the last. You just have to remember no matter what, you saved a life tonight—more than one in fact. You saved Zach from prison, and his mother and brother from any more abuse. And although he is a blackened soul, you saved Bruce from death. Now their family can finally heal.”
A weak smile came to my lips. “I know I should see it that way, but I just don’t.”
“Give it sometime. You’ve had a really emotional night.” Sophie rose up from the bed. “I’ll let you sleep now.”
“Okay.”
She started for the door. “Sophie?” I called. She turned back to look at me. “Thanks.”
She smiled. “No problem.”
After Sophie closed the door, I eyed the clock. It was a little after eleven. I burrowed under the covers and willed sleep to come. I must’ve dozed off because shortly after one, a noise caused me to jump. I bolted from the bed and went over the window.
It was Zach.
I immediately threw open the window and helped pull him inside. When I closed the window, I turned back to him. For a few minutes, we just stood staring at each other. Finally I broke the silence. “How’s your mom?”
“She’s gonna be okay. She’s got a pretty bad concussion, so they’re keeping her overnight for observation. AJ’s staying with her.”
“I’m so happy she’s all right.”
Zach nodded.
“And Bruce?” I asked.
“The officers assured me since he was on probation for several DUI’s and since he’d broken the restraining order, it would ensure he was put away for awhile.”
“That’s good news.”
“Yeah, it is,” Zach replied.
We once again stood in silence. As he stared at me, Zach’s mouth hovered between saying something and staying quiet. Finally, he drew in a deep breath. “So what happened tonight?”
“What do you mean?”
“Tonight when you came between Bruce and me….”
“You were going to kill him. I
had to stop you.”
He shook his head. “But you had wings. I saw them with my own eyes! I heard the sound they made, and I felt the wind.”
I stared down at my hands, unwilling to answer him. He quickly crossed the room to stand in front me. When I looked up, I found him staring into my eyes, searching for answers. “What are you?”
The intensity of his stare took my breath away. My head spun, and it took me a few seconds to find the words. “Why are you asking me what you already know?”
“Because I need to hear it from your lips. I need to know I’m not crazy!”
“You’re not crazy,” I protested in a whisper.
“Then tell me,” he insisted.
I bit down on my lip, knowing the moment I admitted it everything would be forever changed. The metallic taste of blood filled my mouth. I heard myself murmur, “Please…” It was so soft I doubted he heard me.
“Cassie, you have to tell me!”
The barricade broke, and the words rushed out. “I’m a guardian angel.”
The words didn’t have the effect I thought they would. Zach stared at me, wide-eyed and incredulous. Slowly, his head swiveled from side to side, his eyes never leaving mine. “But it can’t be!”
“Why not?”
“Because it doesn’t make any sense. You’re not some winged creature flying around Heaven. You’re as real as I am!” he argued.
A smile filled with regret crept on my lips. “Are you so sure?”
“Yes, I’m sure. I’ve held you in my arms, and I-I’ve…kissed you.”
“I know. But trust me, I am an angel—an angel in human form sent to guide and protect you.”
“But why me?” Zach asked.
“The Dominion knew you needed someone. I was with you the night Bruce threw you out…and on the bridge-”
Zach gasped. “That was you?”
“Yes,” I said.
“But I swore I heard my father that night.”
“You did…I thought the best way to save you and to be Lucius would be to channel your father.”
Zach’s brows furrowed. “Lucius? That guy from prom?”
“He happens to be a demon.”
Zach’s knees buckled, and he sunk down on the bed. “This is unbelievable.”
I hesitated only a moment before I eased down beside him. “It may be unbelievable, but it’s the truth.”
“And so you just flew down here from Heaven or something to help me?”
“No, it’s a little more complicated than that.”
“I want to know,” he insisted.
I drew in a ragged breath and told Zach everything from start to finish, including everything with Lauren.
“Man,” he murmured. We stood in silence for a few moments while he processed everything. “So, Rafe and Elijah…are they angels too?”
I nodded. “Gabriel and Sophie, too.”
“So let me get this straight. You guys are a bunch of angels sent to earth in human form to save and protect lost souls?”
He bolted up and began pacing around the room. “This is insane! I mean, it sounds like something out of a Sci-Fi movie! I mean, it makes perfect sense when it comes out of your mouth, but when I try and process it, it’s crazy.”
“It doesn’t have to be.”
He stopped in front of me. “How can it not be? Y-You’re not of this world, Cassie!”
I shook my head. “My heart beats just like yours, and my lungs take in the same air as you. I have the same emotions as you. I laugh, I cry, I get angry, and I love just like you do!”
Zach didn’t say anything. It was like he was silently processing things in his mind. I could almost see the wheels turning. “What about your wings?”
“They’re always concealed within us unless we have to physically intercede on someone’s behalf. They make us ten times stronger than in human form.”
“Is that why they came out? Because you had to save me?”
“I-I didn’t know what I would have to do. I mean, I thought I might have to fight Bruce to stop you.”
It took him a few minutes to find his voice again. “So you can appear and disappear right?”
I nodded.
“So you can spy on me?
I flushed at his implications. “No, no, we can only use it when we’re called by pain and suffering. We can’t just show up because we want too.” Relief flooded Zach’s face. In his silence, I put my hand over his. “It’s still me, Zach. I’m still your friend just like before.”
His expression broke my heart. “Then I’d just have to pretend my heart doesn’t belong to you.”
“What?” I gasped.
“Ever since that night I told you how I truly felt, I can’t be around you without imagining us together that way. I’ve tried to think about only Lauren—to try to feel about her the way I feel about you.” His head hung in defeat. “But I can’t”
“Zach—”
He held his hand up to silence me. “It’s useless, Cassie. I know I can’t be without you even as a friend because I can’t allow myself to desire someone who’s an angel!”
“So are you saying you can’t even be my friend anymore?”
His shoulder’s drooped in defeat. “I don’t know what anything is anymore.”
“I understand,” I lied.
“You and the others don’t have to worry. I won’t say anything about what happened.”
I didn’t have the heart to tell him that he didn’t have to worry about that. After his memory was wiped, he wouldn’t remember anything about what had happened tonight in the morning.
But I would.
There would be no mind wiping for me, and I would be forever haunted by his profession of love and feeling like a failure at my mission.
He started for the window, but then he turned back. “I’ll never forget what you did for me and for my family, Cassie.”
I closed my eyes. “Zach, please don’t!”
“No, I need to say this,” he argued.
“Okay,” I whispered.
“You saved my life on two occasions, but you did so much more for me emotionally. You gave me my faith back, and you showed me how to love someone.” Zach paused as his voice cracked. “You made me a better man.”
He was saying good-bye like this would be the last time we were ever together—or at least alone together. That thought broke me. I could no longer fight the tears welling in my eyes. Blurring my vision, they stung to be released. Finally, they dripped down my cheeks while desperate sobs threatened to consume me. I knew I had no right to be angry or hurt with him. After all, I was the one who had deceived him. But at the same time, my heart, my human heart, was breaking.
Zach walked over to me. With his fingertips, he tenderly feathered the tears from my cheeks. “I will always care about you, and I’ll always want to be your friend. I just don’t think I can…there will always be a part of me that wants more.”
“I understand,” I replied.
He leaned in, his lips brushing softly against my cheek. His breath hovered there, hot and warm, before he jerked away. Without another word, he slipped out the window.
And he was gone.
He was free from the abuse that drove him to desperation and threatened his life. He had rebuilt the faith that death and bitterness stripped away, and he had learned to love someone with his heart and not his body—maybe even two people when it came to both Lauren and me.
And then my thoughts went to Lauren. Guilt once again lashed at my body like a whip. Everything positive I’d done for Zach seemed to pale in comparison when I looked at what I’d done to Lauren. I may not have done it to her face, but the fact I’d done behind her back was even worse. Somehow in the next few months I’d make it right for her—no matter what I had to do, or no matter how awful it made me feel.
All those thoughts swirled through my mind like an out of control tempest. Frozen where I was, there was little I could do but succumb to the storm as it crashed wave aft
er wave against me.
Zach and Lauren were safe, and I was completely undone.
Chapter Thirty-Two: ELIJAH
It was Friday night, and Abby and I had our first semi-date together. As romantic as I wanted it to be, it turned out to be anything but. Abby saw Cassie moping around the house over what had happened with Zach—well at least what Abby was lead to believe about what happened to Zach—so she asked Cassie to come along with us. Then Rafe decided to come too, hoping that Chaz would come, but in the end, he’d been called into work.
We grabbed a quick bite to eat after the movie before heading home. We hadn’t gotten very far when Rafe inhaled sharply in the backseat. I glanced back at him in the rearview mirror.
Something was wrong.
Abby kept chatting to me, but I wasn’t listening. Instead, I focused on Rafe. His face contorted in agony, and he fought to catch his breath. Slowly, I concentrated on connecting with his pain. The vision started fuzzy at first until it flickered into an image before my eyes.
And it wasn’t good.
A party raged out of control. Music blared around couples dancing frantically. Alcohol bottles littered the floors. My eyes scanned the crowd until I saw Chaz. While others laughed and joked around him, his hazy eyes stared into space. Darkness hung around him, and I knew it was his grief over his mother. He’d been doing so well with his sobriety, but something so inconsequential like finding a note from his mom tucked into an old pair of jeans had sent him over the edge.
Three beers sat next to him on the floor. Downing them in quick succession did little to drown the ache in his chest. When hot tears welled in his eyes, he scrambled away from the others, not wanting to appear weak for crying. He burst out onto the deck and gulped in the night air. He glanced around and was thankful to find himself alone. Or at least he thought he was alone.
As Chaz gripped the deck railing, I could see he was trying to also get a grip on his emotions. A voice behind him made him jump. “What’s the matter?”
Chaz whirled around. To him the guy was a stranger, but I knew him all too well.
Lucius.
