Row’s mouth opened and he looked like he was going to argue for a second but then he shook his head and stepped inside. As he sank down to his butt he muttered, “I can’t believe I’m doing this.”
But the moment he spread his legs forward and leaned back onto King’s chest, his body deflated, as if the stress that it had been holding inside from his shitty night began to leak out.
King picked up the cloth he had on the side, dipped it into the water and squeezed it over Row’s chest, rubbing small circles as he did.
“I haven’t taken a bath since I was, like, ten,” Row mumbled.
King continued to massage the silky, warm water over Row even after the man fell silent. He didn’t acknowledge the tears that he saw as they began to flow from Row’s eyes. He only tightened his arms around Row’s ribcage when silent sobs began shaking the man’s body….letting him know that he was there for him. Row’s knees pulled up and he wrapped his arms around his legs, pressing his forehead to his knees as he cried and King did everything he could to let the man know that he wasn’t alone, draping his chest over Row’s back and holding him tight.
He held him, cradled him, loved him until Row’s body stopped shaking, until his tears stopped falling, until he knew that the man had finally let everything go. He felt that the moment that Row let out a huge sigh and he turned his head, resting his cheek on his knees and giving King a sad, sweet smile.
“Come here,” King whispered as he leaned back again, gently pulling Row with him.
He caressed his fingers up and down Row’s arms, on his shoulders, over his chest, down his stomach. But not farther. This wasn’t about sex. This was about comfort, about care, about being there for the one you love, about letting them fall apart while holding them in your arms.
Row melted, literally melted back against King’s chest and there they stayed until the water started to cool and the bubbles disappeared.
King had been right, Row thought as he allowed the man’s strength to hold him up, sometimes all it took to wash away the stress of life was warm water, soft bubbles and the arms of love holding you tight.
“You don’t have to do this, you know. We can ask Brent and JD to assign another team.”
Row sighed again as he turned, putting his back against the wall and draping his feet over the edge, “I know. And thank you for saying that. I know it’s going to be hard, King, I know that. But I also know that I’m angry. What they’re doing is fucking wrong and I want to stop them. I want to help those kids, King. I need to help those kids. It’ll be the hardest thing I’ve ever done but I know that with your arms waiting to hold me at the end of every day, I’ll be okay.”
King pushed forward and then turned sideways, his shoulder bumping against Row’s as he too draped his feet over the side. “I’ll always be here for you, babe.”
Row smiled and then got a mischievous glint in his eyes. After a moment, he knew why.
King’s eyebrow lifted as he fought to hide his smirk, “Row, what are you doing?”
“Making circles.”
“Making circles…..with your dick.”
Where Row had seemed so lost and broken barely an hour ago, now his eyes sparkled with his smile, “Yeah. Is it working for you?”
“Yeah, it kinda is.”
Row snorted a laugh, the first laugh King had heard from the man since they began this fucking case. That was the moment that King knew for certain that Row was going to be okay.
Twenty-Five
Colby’s eyes blinked open and he yawned as he tried to stretch but he could barely move because he was weighed down by a warm body…
Jaden, he thought with a smile.
Last night was the first full night they’d spent together in the same bed.
It had been a long time since he’d woken up to someone in his bed. Even when he was married to Stacey, they rarely slept in the same bed. She’d claimed it was because of her bad back but he had always wondered if it was because he never cuddled with her, never had the desire to.
With Jaden, all he wanted to do was hold him tight. Pull him closer. Love him.
His arm closed around Jaden’s back and began caressing him, smiling as the memories from the night before played through his mind like a movie…..if that movie contained super-hot sex between two men.
Last night had not been rushed, had not been frantic. Instead it had been the slow, erotic exploration of two people who were both familiar and new – knowing what the other man looked like, felt like but also discovering new things, amazing things that made them soar to new heights.
Jaden inhaled sharply as Colby’s tongue slid across the deep ‘V’ that formed beneath the man’s rippled abs. He catalogued the spot and continued up Jaden’s ribcage.
“Fuck, you’re killing me, babe. What are you doing?”
Colby’s tongued flicked around Jaden’s nipple, “Learning,” he whispered as he moved over to the other nipple.
Jaden’s hips punched up, seeking relief for his aching prick, “Learning what?” he said with a groan.
Colby lifted his head and waited for Jaden to open his eyes, “You,” he said once their eyes locked together and then he surged up, claiming Jaden’s mouth with his own.
Colby sighed and slid his hand down his body to try to adjust his now aching prick.
“You must be thinking about something really good,” Jaden mumbled, smiling as he turned his sleepy gaze to Colby.
“I was thinking about last night.”
“It was hot, I can see why it made you hard,” Jaden said as he reached down to wrap his hand around Colby’s dick, slowly stroking it.
“It’s not just that. It’s, it’s…..” Colby sighed out a frustrated breath.
Jaden lifted up, moving his hand to rest it on Colby’s abs, “It’s what, babe? Tell me.”
As Colby tried to form the words in his head, he turned to his side, interlocking his fingers with Jaden’s, “With your brother, I loved him but we were so young and naïve and even though I cared for Stacey we never really had passion, that spark wasn’t there. With you, fuck, with you I want you so much it’s hard to breathe but it’s so much more than just that. I feel you, Jade, in here,” he said as he placed their joined hands over his heart, “You are already a part of me, you’re in here and even if I have to walk away from you, from this, from us because of family or whatever, it’ll hurt like hell but I know that a part of you will always be with me.”
Jaden leaned forward, pressing their foreheads together. He opened his mouth to say something…..
“I’m tired, sweaty, I smell like a man who’s been sitting in a car for hours because I have been.”
Colby’s feet shot up in the air as his body jerked, “What the fuck?”
Jaden just rolled his eyes, “You are such an asshole, Brent.”
They both looked over at the man whose bulky body filled the entire doorway to their small bedroom. Brent did look tired, and not happy, which didn’t bode well for Jaden…..or Colby.
“Dude, this is a motor home. You barely move and the damn thing shakes. How the hell did you get in here without making a fucking sound?” Colby sputtered out as he blushed and tried to hide the erection that was tenting the sheet between his legs.
Jaden looked at Colby with sympathy, “Get used to it, babe. Brent loves to use his secret-agent-ninja skills whenever he can. He used to love it when he snuck up on me and I screamed.”
Brent snorted a laugh as he turned around, “Only because you scream like a girl. Come on, let’s get this over with.”
He walked out and they heard him plop down on the sofa.
Colby and Jaden pulled on t-shirts and sweatpants and made their way out to join him. When the two of them started to sit in the recliners across from Brent, “Nope. I want lover boy next to me so I can see his eyes,” Brent said as he stared at Colby. Colby had paused mid-sit so he slowly rose back to his feet after a quick glance at Jaden.
“Okay,” Brent said as h
e turned his body so it was facing Colby, “Tell me about the night that you killed my cousin.”
“Brent,” Jaden mumbled.
Colby kept his eyes on Brent as he responded, “It’s okay, Jade. The man has a right to know.”
Colby took a deep breath and then, for the second time in less than a week, he told the story that he had been carrying around inside him for over five years, the story that weighed him down like lead weights, the story that almost killed him.
His eyes were filled with tears by the time he finished but Brent wasn’t done with him, not by a long shot and he knew it.
“So, you plead guilty because you felt like you were responsible, like it was your fault,” he said and even though it wasn’t a question, Colby nodded his head.
“And bad shit happened to you inside.”
Another non-question, another nod.
Brent raked his hands through his hair as he grumbled a few choice words. “You kept your nose clean since you got out?”
“Absolutely. I worked at Spike’s Bikes for three years before I met Morgan.”
Brent held a hand up, “Whoa, whoa, whoa, hold on a second there. Spike’s Bikes?”
Colby frowned as his protective hackles rose, “Yeah, why?”
“Spike Neilson’s shop?”
What the fuck? “Yeah, but how did you…?”
“Spike and I go way back, like way back. He helped my scrawny ass survive boot camp. Wait until I tell Drake,” he said with a chuckle, “The three of us were inseparable once Spike took us under his very large wings. He and I had a thing for like five minutes but he’ll probably never admit that since I broke his heart.”
Colby’s eyes snapped open, “Wait, Spike is gay?”
Brent shook his head, “No, he’s bi, like me. You didn’t know that?”
Colby shook his head, “No, he never,” his frown deepened, “Why wouldn’t he tell me? He knew what I was struggling with. I can’t remember how many times I cried on his shoulder. I just don’t understand why he didn’t tell me.”
Brent’s hand closed over Colby’s forearm, “Knowing him, my guess is that he was worried that him coming out to you might influence whatever it was you were going through.”
Colby thought about that for a minute before he relaxed and nodded.
Brent leaned back and glanced between Jaden and Colby, “So, tell me how this happened,” he said as he waved his hand between them.
Colby frowned again because this was going to sound bad, “I, um, I kind of stalked him.”
Brent’s eyebrows went up as he crossed his arms over his chest, “Okay, why?”
“I,” Colby scrubbed a hand over his face, “I thought about him a lot when I was inside. I worried about him. I knew how hard the Payne’s were on Wes. I was afraid that things were worse for Jaden since he was now an only child. I just wanted to make sure he was okay.”
“And once you found him, what happened? Why didn’t you just check on him and walk away?”
Colby glanced at Jaden, “I……couldn’t. But I also couldn’t bring myself to talk to him.”
“Because?”
“Because I was terrified that he would hate me. I knew I couldn’t handle it if he did so I just kept an eye on him.”
“Until?”
Colby glanced over at Jaden again, who nodded his permission. Colby looked back at Brent, “Until he picked me up in a bar.”
Brent snorted a laugh as he looked at Jaden, “Classy, cuz.”
“Can you blame me? Look at him! He’s like a walking wet dream!”
Colby’s cheeks turned pink as he looked down at his lap, but Brent didn’t miss the smile that the man kept trying hide.
“Yeah, I’d fuck him,” Brent said.
“What?” Colby said with a gasp.
“Brent!” Jaden said.
Brent rolled his eyes, “I’m married, not dead. He’s hot. If I wasn’t hopelessly devoted to my husband I’d be all over his ass.”
Jaden rose to his feet, “Brent Aaron Whitman, you take that back,” he shouted with a growly voice as his fists clenched at his sides.
Brent snorted a laugh, “Sit down Yogi, I’m not going to steal your bear.”
Jaden sat down with a huff.
Brent’s eyes glowed with his smile, “It always was so easy to piss him off….and so fun.”
“So, what’s the plan here?” Brent said.
Colby and Jaden glanced at each other, “I’m going to take Jaden to my folks’ place. There’s something there I need to show him. We were hoping you could go see his parents while we did that and then we’ll meet you there.”
“What are you going to show him?”
“Notebooks full of Westley’s drawings.”
Brent was silent as he looked between the two of them and then….were those tears in his eyes? He let out a breath and then reached his hand into his back pocket and pulled out his wallet. He opened it and dug into a side pocket. He extracted a square of white paper. He unfolded it very carefully and set it on the table. It was a charcoal drawing of a younger Brent, smiling as he looked down at something. “He drew this right after I told him I was bi. I was so happy because he was the first person I told and his only response was to tell me that he loved me and I would always be his favorite cousin. I loved that kid and knew he had so much potential as an artist.”
“He did,” Colby whispered, tears shimmering in his own eyes.
Brent looked at him, “You have more of his stuff?”
Colby nodded, “Yeah. I have all of it. His parents weren’t exactly,” he glanced out the window, “supportive of what they called his cute little hobby. He was worried that they would go through his stuff and throw it away. So, he moved it all to my place.”
Brent cleared his throat, “Good, that’s good,” he mumbled as he re-folded his drawing and tucked it back into his wallet, obviously trying to get his emotions under control.
“You ready to go?” he said when he looked back up at them.
“What? Now?” Jaden said with a squeak.
“Yeah. I’m on a case that needs my full attention. Let’s go rip this band-aid off, get it over with so I can come back and do what I need to do, okay?”
The bottom of Jaden’s stomach dropped as he glanced at Colby.
As if reading his mind, Colby dropped to his knees between Jaden’s legs, squeezing his hands on Jaden’s thighs, “We’ll be okay, babe. No matter what happens, you and I will be okay.”
A single tear slipped from Jaden’s eye and slid down his cheek, “You promise?”
Colby squeezed Jaden’s hand before leaning down and pressing his lips to the back of it, “I promise,” he somehow whispered past the lump in his throat because he knew the truth. Yes, they’d be okay but there was a very good chance that they might have to be okay…..separately. He refused to be the reason that this family fractured….again. If Jaden’s parents couldn’t accept him in Jaden’s life, he would do the right thing, the honorable thing, the devastating thing and disappear from Jaden’s life.
He could only hope that it wouldn’t come down to that, or, if it did, that they would both survive….
Twenty-Six
Row inhaled as he rolled to his back and stretched his arms over his head. As he came more awake, he blinked his eyes in the bright room and looked around. He saw King sitting in a lounger on the balcony, a cup of coffee next to him as he read something on his tablet. From the bright sky, Row guessed that it was around nine or ten. He hadn’t slept this late in years. In fact, he slept so hard that he didn’t even remember getting out of the bath, drying off or getting into bed.
He smiled fondly as he remembered the bath from the night before. It had been so unexpected….and so damn perfect. It was exactly what he’d needed and King somehow knew that.
His smile turned to a frown as he thought, if the tables were reversed, would he know exactly what to do to help King?
“Stop it,” King said as he placed a hand on Row’s
cheek.
What the fuck? When did he move from the balcony? How did he do that without Row even noticing?
King’s other hand moved up until he was cupping Row’s jaw between his gentle hands, “Stop, Row, just stop.”
“But….”
King’s thumb moved over to hold Row’s lips closed, “No, babe.”
“But….” he tried again even though it was muffled.
“Row, this isn’t a competition. It isn’t a who loves who more thing. This is a relationship. Sometimes you’ll need more from me than I need from you but there will be many times when I need more from you and I have no doubt that you’ll be there for me. That’s how this works. This is how love is.”
“But,” Row said as he wrestled his lips away from King’s thumb, “how do you know what all I need? How do you seem to know what I’m thinking? We haven’t seen each other in a year, King, and yet you seem to have fallen so easily back into, well, us but I feel like I’m,” his gaze moved to the floor to ceiling windows, “falling without a net.”
“What’s my favorite color?”
Row’s gaze moved back, “What?”
“What’s my favorite color, Row?”
A shy smile lifted one corner of Row’s mouth, “Green.”
“What shade of green?”
Row blushed, “Light seaweed green.”
King smiled, “Why?”
“Because you say my eyes are the color of seaweed filtered by sunlight and it’s your favorite color.”
“Exactly. What cheesy movie line do I always say?”
“I ain’t got time to bleed.”
“Where did I grow up?”
“Billings, Montana.”
King leaned forward and pressed their lips together, “You know me, Row. You know me. You have to remember that I’ve spent the last year thinking about you, obsessing over you to the point that everything about you consumed me. You spent the last year trying to forget I even existed, trying not to think about me.”
“I failed miserably,” Row said with a frown.
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