“Horrified?” he offered, that hint of amusement once again in his voice. He seemed to revert to amusement no matter what the circumstance, as though he were forever on the lookout for reasons to laugh—at himself, and at everyone around him.
Such a strange man.
A strange, gruff, kind, wonderful man.
A surge of affection for this brute had her looking away as heat stole over her.
Horrified, he’d said. That was the right word for her reaction, and yet it wasn’t the truth. She hadn’t been able to fathom it because…because…
She sighed. “I was raised to marry well.”
He stayed silent beside her.
She peeked over at him with a smile she feared was bitter. “I was supposed to be a boy, you know.”
He arched his brows. “Oh yes?”
She let out a huff of amusement at his tone. “I was a disappointment because not only did I kill my mother in childbirth, but I had the gall to be a girl as well.”
He winced slightly, no doubt at the acidity in her tone. But it could not be helped. This man had been honest with her and had saved her at every turn. He deserved the unfettered truth.
“All I was ever meant to do was marry well. It was all I was good for in my father’s eyes. I thought if I could at least do that than maybe…”
He’d love me. He’d think me worthy.
It was too depressing to say any of those aloud, but she assumed he understood without her spelling it out.
He squeezed her hand tightly and she let out a long exhale. “But I am beginning to see that perhaps his good opinion is not worth much. Not really. After all, why should he think well of me when I do not think well of him?”
He shifted, flipping her hand so he could hold it properly.
Well, improperly, as the case may be.
“Delilah, it is only natural to want to please your parents. To live up to their hopes and expectations.”
She nodded. “I suppose you are right. But still…” She met his gaze. “I am sorry for the way I behaved when you offered to save me.”
“Don’t be,” he said softly. “I completely understand.” He paused. “I would have been horrified at the thought of marrying me, too.”
A short laugh was shocked out of her at that and when she looked up and met those warm brown eyes that now twinkled with laughter, she felt a lightness steal over her and she laughed some more, him joining in this time.
For the first time in a long time, she felt…happy.
Which was ridiculous given the circumstances, but there it was. Sitting here, alone with this man, who seemed to understand her and perhaps even like her despite all her many flaws—or maybe because of them…
She felt at home. She felt welcome.
She felt…loved.
The thought had her chest constricting, her lungs emptying of air as the room seemed to shift around her.
It wasn’t necessarily a bad feeling. No, this heady, dizzy sensation was almost...pleasant. She supposed it was how one felt when one imbibed too much sherry.
She felt positively intoxicated by the warmth that flooded her in his presence.
“I was wrong, though, when I said I could not marry you.” She said it as lightly as she could manage once her heart resumed a normal beat. “It would be a privilege to be your wife.”
His gaze intensified so quickly it made her heart race all over again and the air between them grew heavy and hot with anticipation.
Heat flooded her cheeks as her own words hit her. Heavens, how very forward of her. He must have thought… What if he believed she was saying…
Her voice came out too loud. “What I meant to say was that any woman would be honored—”
He cut off her words with a kiss. He’d moved so quickly she had not seen it coming, tugging her arm lightly so she tumbled toward him, her free hand catching herself against his chest as he wrapped his arm around her and pulled her closer so she was nestled against his side.
His kiss was heaven, all warmth and affection, passion and tenderness, as his lips crushed hers with a force that made her heart thud painfully in response.
He pulled back slightly and rested his forehead against hers as they both breathed heavily. “Delilah, I—” He pulled back to look at her and wariness stole over his gaze.
“Yes?”
His chest rose and fell beneath her hands. “There is something I really ought to tell you…”
Nervous anticipation had her muscles contracting as if she could physically brace herself for whatever blow that was to come.
It would be a blow. His normally laid-back expression was replaced by a wariness that was unnerving. All amusement was gone from his eyes.
“Rupert, whatever it is, you can tell me,” she said quietly.
He gave her a rueful little smile. “Delilah, I am…”
A bastard.
A merchant.
A pauper who inherited a lovely home.
“I am the second son of a marquess,” he said on one long breath.
She blinked. “Pardon?”
Amusement once more crept into his gaze. “The Marquess of Markland,” he said. “He is my father.”
“What?” She pushed away from him. “But why…? How…?” Shock had her so flustered she could not even form a question.
His low laugh made her insides quiver and then she was back in his arms.
“Right,” he said, satisfaction written all over his face. “Now that we’ve got that sorted…”
His kiss killed any questions she might have asked, and though she had questions that would be answered, for now…she was more than happy to let him kiss her instead.
13
“You mean, you did not know that he was a marquess’s son?” Prudence asked. Her features were the picture of disbelief.
“You really had no idea?” Addie was laughing. Her little brother Reggie was laughing too though Delilah assumed he was not laughing at her.
She narrowed her eyes at the toddler. He’d better not be.
Her scowl made him giggle that much more.
Louisa was off with her family, or maybe her fiancé, since they rarely seemed to be parted these days. Good thing. Louisa would have been laughing so hard Delilah might have had to smack her.
She huffed. “You could have told me,” she said to Addie.
Addie shrugged. “I didn’t realize you did not know.”
Prudence gave a little sigh of exasperation. “I suppose this means you like him now?”
Heat flooded Delilah’s cheeks too quickly for her to hide it. She ducked her head all the same, feigning a great interest in the embroidery on her lap which had been doing nothing to hold her interest until just this moment.
Embarrassment mingled with shame. Embarrassment because—yes. Yes, she did like him.
Quite a bit, in fact.
Just the thought of him made her feel warm all over. And…mushy. Her insides had definitely taken to melting whenever she thought of him.
Most inconvenient as she’d been doing nothing but thinking about the man all day. She’d thought of him while taking breakfast in her room. She’d thought of him when he’d seen her to the school, all gruff charm as usual as though this was just another day.
As though he was not bound to slay her dragons this very evening.
He was all calm confidence as he bid her farewell as though he had not kissed her senseless the night before.
The other girls were strangely silent so she made a halfhearted attempt to jab a needle into her embroidery. She’d likely ruin the thing if she kept assaulting it like this, but what else was she to do with her restless hands as she waited for word that Rupert was all right?
She shifted uncomfortably, all too aware of Prudence’s unwavering gaze.
Prudence knew her too well, at times. And her words still stung. I suppose that means you like him now.
Her friend wasn’t trying to be cruel. She was just honest. She’d never hesitate
d on calling Delilah out on her moral flaws, and Delilah’s selfish desire for status, power, and yes, wealth—well, it was legendary.
She’d embraced her reputation as the spoiled debutante, and now she was stuck with it.
Because it was still true.
Wasn’t it?
“Delilah?” Addie’s voice was gentle. “Are you all right?”
Delilah lifted her head with a smile. “Fine.”
Addie still looked concerned. “They will be safe, you know.”
Delilah nodded. Tolston was with Rupert, and they had a handful of men, as well. They’d left two men here to guard her and the others, although everyone agreed that with Everley at the docks and distracted by his business, the security was most likely an unnecessary precaution.
As Tolston had said before they’d left. Only a desperate man or a fool would attack Delilah here, tonight when she was surrounded by friends and in a good neighborhood.
And besides... If all went well, she would be back with Rupert in his home by the time the moon was high overhead.
A desperate tightness in her chest stole her breath away. She could not wait to be back home with Rupert safe at her side.
Prudence reached a hand out to cover hers. “Are you so very worried about him then?”
Delilah thought to make a quip, to toss aside her friend’s concern. But in the end, she did not have the energy to feign nonchalance. “Yes.”
The other two girls studied her in silence and Delilah let them. What was the point of pretending?
“You care about him.” Prudence’s comment might have been sweet if she did not seem so stunned.
Delilah scowled. “Of course I care about him. I just told you that he kissed me, did I not?”
Prudence’s eyes went wide and she looked like an owl wearing those spectacles she only wore when embroidering or reading alone in her room. She might act all morally superior, but Prudence suffered her share of vanity.
“Yes, but I thought…” Prudence trailed off, her lips pursing in an expression befitting a peeved governess.
Addie leaned forward, stepping in as the peacemaker. “I think what Prudence meant was that she thought…that is, we believed…” She cleared her throat, casting a quiet look of desperation in Prudence’s direction.
“We thought you allowed him to kiss you because you’d learned of his status,” Prudence finished.
Delilah blinked as the words struck her chest. Of course her friends would think that. They would undoubtedly believe that she would only allow a man to kiss her so scandalously if she thought him to be proper husband material.
She had a sudden flash of Rupert’s eyes—so warm with affection, his arms around her so secure and stable, his voice so low and amused even when she was saying all the wrong things. The type of things that typically drove people away.
He would be wonderful husband material, but not because of his honorary title.
Because of him.
She bit her lip as unexpected tears filled her eyes causing her friends to lean toward her with alarm.
“Dee?” Prudence said, shock replacing her judgmental scowl. “Are you all right?”
No. She was not all right. Because the man who’d kissed her, the gentleman who was at this very moment riding off into the night to fight her battle, the man who’d held her and comforted her and who seemed to understand her as no other ever had…
He had proposed the other night.
Sort of.
In a manner of speaking.
And she’d rejected him.
She blinked rapidly to try and push the unshed tears away but only managed to make them trickle over so she was swiping at her eyes in dismay.
“Delilah,” Addie said slowly, gently. She shifted Reggie in her lap and used the same tone of voice she used when she was attempting to make her younger brother eat his peas. “Did you kiss Mr. Calloway before you knew he was the son of a marquess?”
Delilah hesitated and then nodded.
Prudence let out a gasp more befitting a melodrama at the theater.
Delilah frowned at her friend. “Really, Pru, it is not that shocking.”
Pru’s wide eyes begged to differ.
Delilah huffed. “He kissed me before last night as well,” she said. For some reason the truth was just pouring out of her tonight, and it was a relief. Focusing on Rupert and her feelings for him was better than wondering where he was now and what sort of danger he might meet upon his trip to the docks.
“When you believed him to be some sort of hired investigator?” Addie asked.
Delilah rolled her eyes. Was it really that difficult to understand? “Yes.”
“Because you…” Prudence looked around the room as if searching for an answer. “Because you felt so indebted to him for saving your life?”
Delilah frowned at her friend. Prudence was going to make her say it aloud. “No, you ninny. Because I…” She swallowed. “Because I like him.” She cleared her throat. “Quite a bit, actually.”
So much so that the word ‘like’ felt completely wrong on her tongue. So mild and unfeeling as to be meaningless.
“I see,” Prudence said.
It was clear that she did not.
But Addie did. The other girl was giving her a soft, sympathetic smile that spoke of understanding and empathy. “It is awfully overwhelming, is it not?”
Delilah shifted in her seat. “What is?”
“Falling in love.”
Delilah’s lungs stopped working. Her heart, on the other hand—her heart decided this was the moment to prove how hard it could work. It seemed like the organ might explode within her chest if it beat any harder.
Love.
Was this love?
She let out a long rush of air. Yes. That was precisely what this feeling was—the sensation that she’d forgotten herself entirely.
Or maybe that she’d found a new part of herself that she hadn’t known existed.
All she knew was that it was terrifying, this sense of suddenly needing another human being. But it was also…rather lovely, in a way. Not the needing, and not the fearing for his safety, but the knowledge that she could care about someone so thoroughly and completely. So blindly.
More than that, that someone could look at her the way he did, as though she were perfect, even with all her plentiful flaws.
Whenever she acted badly, he seemed to find it amusing, like he could see right past her sharp tongue and her harsh words to the heart of her. Like he knew her so well that try as she might, she would never scare him away.
He looked at her like she had true value. Like she was priceless, even if she did not have a fortune to give or a plot of land to bestow with her dowry. He held her in his arms as though he could honestly care about her and…
Well, she hoped that meant he loved her.
He did, didn’t he? He would not have kissed her, or offered to marry her, or taken such sweet care of her if he did not.
Right?
“Have you…” Prudence cleared her throat and shifted in her seat as though this talk of emotions made her ill at ease. Likely true. Prudence was not one to talk about romance or love. Unlike Louisa who was smitten with romance novels, and Addie who’d been smitten with Tolston since she’d arrived at the school, Prudence was distinctly uncomfortable with all talk of love. She tilted her head to the side with feigned composure. “Have you discussed the future?”
Delilah winced as if her friend had struck her. “Not quite.”
And right now that fact was killing her. Rupert had not mentioned marriage again after her disastrous response that first time.
And yet she’d let him kiss her.
And then she’d kissed him back.
Without a thought for her reputation or her future.
“Of course they haven’t,” Addie said with a sigh of exasperation. “Who could be concentrating on the future when Delilah’s very life is in danger.”
Delilah straightened at that an
d even Prudence looked a bit chastened at the reminder of what they were all doing here.
Waiting.
Delilah stood up with a start. “I cannot just sit here and embroider while Rupert is in danger.” She shot Addie and accusing glare. “How can you be so complacent?”
Addie sighed. “I am not. I’m terrified, but I know that Tolston and the others are well armed and they have the advantage of surprise.”
“Everley is not such a big man and he won’t be traveling with an army if he wishes to remain inconspicuous.” There were times when Prudence’s teacherly voice grated on Delilah’s nerves, but right now her didactic tone was reassuring.
She was right, of course. She and Addie likely had nothing to worry about.
It was just that Delilah would feel so much better when she saw Rupert again with her own two eyes.
And then she would demand that he marry her.
The thought struck her at once and was both ludicrous and…rather perfect, really. He ought to know better than to kiss a young lady without making promises. And she’d be sure that he did.
A nagging sensation in her gut told her she didn’t wish for him to propose because he had to or because he was morally obliged…
But she did wish him to propose.
It did not matter how or why, merely that he did.
She scowled down at her toes. If he did not love her yet, she would just have to make him, that was all.
Her hands clenched into fists. She would make that man love her if it was the last thing she did.
“Oh, Delilah, there you are.” Miss Grayson’s normal calm elegance was nowhere to be seen as she rushed into the room, her skirts whipping around her legs with her quick pace. “There’s a message for you from your home.”
Delilah took the missive from her with a frown. A message from home? It had to be from her stepmother. A quick look at the penmanship confirmed it but the unusually messy scrawl had her pulse quickening with alarm.
“Your family’s footman is waiting in the hallway,” Miss Grayson murmured, her pretty features tight with concern as Addie, Prudence, and even Reggie came to their feet to watch her read it.
“It’s my father,” she said through lips that had grown numb. “He has taken another turn for the worse.”
The Miseducation of Miss Delilah: A Sweet Regency Romance (School of Charm Book 3) Page 10
