by Kade Boehme
Devon’s face contorted after he’d thought on Gavin’s words another moment. Gavin smiled when Devon finally retorted, “That was mean, G. You’re not an idiot. You’re an asshole.”
Gavin laughed. “Down, boy.” Devon balled up a piece of paper and threw it at him.
“Go down on it, boy,” Devon said and waggled his eyebrows.
Gavin shook his head. “You’re hopeless.” He threw the paper ball back at Devon.
“Okay, there’s still a while until class starts. Explain yourself. Why are you an idiot?”
Gavin hesitated. Devon wasn’t usually the first person he’d go to for advice. Especially about a guy. Devon went through men like some people did clothes in a month. “It’s nothing, really.”
“Stop being dumb. We can all tell something is up with Davy, and you’ve been weird the last few days, so I’d be willing to be you did something to the guy.”
“Why do you automatically assume it was me that did something?” Gavin protested.
Devon’s oh please expression was flawless. It stopped Gavin from further feigning his innocence. “Okay. You’re right. But I really don’t want to talk about it.”
“One of you is going to have to talk about it soon because it’s all weird. Not like Davy is our bestie but he’s pretty cool and I don’t want to feel like a jerk just because I want to stop in for a Twinkie shake. And you know that guy is the only one who makes ’em right.”
“Seriously? This is about you wanting your Twinkie shake fix?”
“You bet your sweet ass, G-man.” Devon smirked unapologetically. “If you get between me and my shake dealer, I promise he will win.”
Gavin laughed. “Again. You’re hopeless.”
“We’ve established that. I’m a hopeless idiot, you’re a feminine hygiene product and the bag it came in. So can we move on to what you did to convince Davy of that fact?”
Gavin sighed. May as well. “Well, we kinda hooked up—”
“Dude, shut up! He let you deflower him?”
“Shut the fuck up. He was not a virgin. Do you wanna hear this or not?”
Devon did the lock-and-key gesture over his mouth but still looked completely surprised. “So, we hooked up. Only when we were moving on to the main event it turned out that we were both, er, bottoms.”
“Ouch,” Devon said earnestly. “So what’d you do?”
“Well, I kinda freaked out. I spazzed and left him holding his own cock.” Gavin reared back at the sudden “What? Are you the biggest dick ever?” that erupted from his friend. Gavin was sure people turned to stare at them, but since that was nothing new for them he didn’t pay any attention.
“I told you. I fucked up. So I don’t blame him for being upset.”
“Well, did you talk to him about it? Explain yourself?”
“I didn’t really know why I reacted that way. And I’ve kind of ignored his texts because I don’t know what the hell to say.”
Devon sat staring at him, wide-eyed in shock. He opened his mouth a few times to say something but never spoke. Gavin squirmed under his gaze. Yeah, Devon was the best of them. So it really smarted knowing he was actually being thought of as an asshole. But he knew he totally deserved it, no matter how much it sucked. Davy had sent a few messages, even going so far as apologizing for some imagined infraction. That made Gavin feel like an even bigger tool, but he hadn’t even shot Davy a simple It’s not you, it’s me to at least let him know he didn’t do anything. Gavin was just a dumbass.
Before Devon got a chance to voice his opinions, the professor called the start of class. Gavin’s mind returned to being miserable. He was pretty sure if he was honest with himself he’d know exactly why he’d freaked out on Davy, but he didn’t want to be honest. Gavin’s phone vibrated in his pocket. He glanced at Devon who had his phone in hand, which he used to point at Gavin’s pocket, indicating he should check his own.
Gavin sighed and dug his phone out of his pocket and retrieved the text message. U should say ur sorry. Prove that ur the good guy that I know U R. Gavin looked up at Devon in surprise. It’d been awhile since anyone said they thought he was a good guy. In fact, he couldn’t remember if anyone had ever said it to him in his life. The idea of Gavin’s mother or his high school boyfriend ever saying anything that nice to him made him snort. Devon gave Gavin a pointed glare and Gavin knew he was right. He gave a nod, getting a pleased grin from Devon.
Davy gritted his teeth when he saw that the person walking through the door to the shop was the last one he wanted to see. After three days of ignored messages, blown-off apologies, and a declined call, Gavin decided to show up in person? Davy really didn’t have patience to deal with him. Fortunately there was a long line of customers. It’d be awhile yet before they had to speak. Davy made sure to give his most withering glare to show Gavin he didn’t appreciate him showing up unannounced. Gavin had the decency to look abashed and took a seat at the corner of the counter. He was out of the way but Davy didn’t want him there at all.
Davy had spent the last three days trying to figure out what he could have done wrong. He got that they were both bottoms and that was awkward, but that was no reason for Gavin to have treated him like total shit. Unless Davy had done something wrong. He’d run the emotional spectrum from mortification to anger to hurt the entire time until he’d admitted he’d, once again, fallen for the worst guy possible. He was lured in by the friendship, his lonely heart making him an easy target. Damn Gavin Walker.
And this is why you don’t date, Davy. He needed to stop thinking about it because he was scowling at customers, even the regular blue-hair crowd who were obviously not sure how to respond to his obvious aggression as he banged around behind the counter. Davy noticed Gavin flinch a few times as he slammed something shut or placed a cup down harder than necessary. Good, asshole. Now get the hint and fuck off.
But Gavin didn’t go away. He sat, waiting patiently, for about an hour as Davy finished up with customers and everyone eventually cleared out of the shop. Davy started cleaning up after he was sure he was finished with the rush, putting away ice cream and wiping the counters. He’d been doing such a good job of ignoring Gavin that he jumped when Gavin finally spoke. “Can we talk?”
Davy turned to him with a scowl. “Go away, Gavin.” He said it with as much ice in his tone as he could muster. Gavin’s brown eyes held a hint of sadness. Dammit, Davy did not want to see that. Why couldn’t Gavin just leave him alone?
“Davy, I know I’m an asshole.”
“No shit.” Davy turned away from him and started washing shake tins. He did not want to see things like the true regret in Gavin’s face. This little game was getting old.
“I’m so sorry. I should never have done that to you. And I really shouldn’t have ignored you afterward.”
Davy grunted in response but refused to face him.
“Seriously, Davy. I know I keep fucking up with you. I do. I want to really explain myself, though. I’ll sit here all day and wait for you to have coffee with me.”
No way. Davy turned on Gavin, who reared back at whatever he saw in Davy’s face. Please don’t let him see the hurt. Please, please, please. “Go. Away.” Davy leaned on the counter and got in Gavin’s face. “I’m done with this crap. I don’t have anything to say to you, Gavin.”
Gavin held Davy’s gaze, then softly placed his hands over Davy’s where they lay on the counter. Davy really wanted to snatch them away but he was hypnotized by the regret in Gavin’s eyes.
Shit.
“Okay. I have a thirty minute lunch coming up. That’s all I’ll give you.”
Gavin perked up, smiling brightly. Davy was still angry enough he wanted to smack that grin off his face. Gavin could obviously sense the mutiny, because he put his hands up in surrender. “No pushing. Thankyou. Thankyou, thankyou. I’ll just run out and grab you something to eat. Taxi Dog? Falafel?”
Davy wouldn’t look a gift horse in the mouth. Or gift jackass in this case. If he didn’
t have to leave to get food, then he’d actually get to sit down for thirty full minutes. “My feet thank you.” Gavin quirked an eyebrow. “Can you go to the gyro place over—”
“On Pine. You like the chicken kabob, right?”
Davy confirmed, grudgingly. He didn’t know how the hell Gavin would know that, but when it came to Gavin’s mysterious ways, Davy had stopped asking questions.
Gavin’s smile was brilliant as he waved and rushed out of the shop. Davy shook his head, unsure of what he was getting himself into. He didn’t know if he could hold it together through another one of Gavin’s colossal fuckups. He couldn’t help thinking he’d be wise to lock the doors and pretend he’d left for lunch while Gavin was gone. But he knew he wouldn’t. He was helpless where Gavin was concerned.
Chapter Ten
Gavin held his breath as he approached the soda shop. He knew that Davy could very well have made a break for it after he’d sent Gavin off. It didn’t seem like Davy’s style, but Gavin wouldn’t have blamed the guy, would have probably done it himself had the roles been reversed. When he got to the door and saw through the window that Davy still waited for him inside, he exhaled loudly.
The bells over the door sounded throughout the deserted shop as Gavin made his way in. Davy looked up from whatever he was doing, a ghost of a smile barely lifting the corners of his mouth. Gavin’s heart stuttered with relief. Maybe that meant there was some hope here. All he needed was hope.
“Got the goods,” Gavin said, holding up the bag of food and smiling. He tried to play it like he would any other day. Just act normal and let Davy loosen up around him, even if it was just a little. Davy came around the counter and put the Gone to Lunch sign up, locked the door. Gavin sat down in one of the three booths at the back of the shop so they’d have privacy from anyone peeping through the windows. Davy took a seat across from him after throwing his apron over the back of the booth. Gavin passed over Davy’s food, wondering at what point it may be appropriate to speak again. He felt so weird not just steamrolling through as he normally would, but the last thing Davy would accept today was Gavin being his usual heavy-handed and demanding self.
After taking a bite of his food, Davy finally glanced up at Gavin. “Well, let’s hear it. You obviously want to say whatever it is bad enough. I’m listening for”—Davy looked at his watch —“twenty minutes. That’s all I’ve got time for.”
Gavin tried to suppress a smile at Davy’s attempt to be a hard-ass. The guy was too nice. He definitely had no trouble being annoyed but Davy was anything but a hard-ass. Cupcake, more like it. Gavin took a bite of his own lunch to muffle the snort that thought caused. Davy cocked his head in question, clearly unamused.
Gavin cleared his throat and put his food down, feeling about two inches tall. Great. “Um. Yeah. Sorry.” He wiped his mouth with a napkin, buying a moment to gather his thoughts. Gavin could hear Devon in his head telling him not to fuck this up. “Okay, so I obviously owe you a huge apology.” Davy snorted, and Gavin reached across to lay a hand on top of one of Davy’s that he’d laid on the tabletop. Davy stilled, looking into Gavin’s eyes. Gavin had never been so sincere when he said, “Honestly. I’m so sorry. Not just for freaking out, but for ditching you. You got me off and I left you sitting there. It was fucked-up and disrespectful.”
Davy blushed and looked away, biting his bottom lip. Damn, but the guy was cute as hell. “D-did I do something?” Davy’s gaze wandered everywhere but in Gavin’s direction. Gavin’s stomach clenched, guilt gnawing its way through him.
“Hey, you,” Gavin said softly. “Look at me.” A moment passed but Davy did eventually turn his gaze back. Gavin wanted to smother the guy with hugs. And damn if that wasn’t a new one for him. Gavin Walker did not hug, much less did he think about smothering people with them. What was Davy doing to him?
“Davy, you didn’t do anything. I’m an asshole. I had been trying so hard to get you to go out with me, even though I don’t even date, and here I was getting in deeper than I figured I was capable. That’s what freaked me out. I usually bottom and when you said you didn’t, the fact that I didn’t find that to be a big deal just made me flip out.”
Davy looked confused. “Let me get this right. You freaked out because even though we are both bottoms it wasn’t a big deal?”
Gavin sighed and nodded. “I know it sounds crazy. It’s just that I’m so used to it only being about sex—hard and fast—and when my brain realized I could do with slow and different with you, I realized that maybe I had real feelings for you.” Davy blinked. Blinked again.
“But—”
“No buts.” Gavin laughed. “Maybe literally.” Davy rolled his eyes, bitching about what a stupid pun that was. “I just know it’s not the only sex we could have, assuming we ever have sex again. And I want to have you around. And not just as a friend.”
Davy chewed his lip again. “Gavin, I just don’t know. You must realize how humiliating all of this has been.”
Gavin gripped his hand tighter. “I know. I do know. I’m horrible. I’m a jerk and I just keep fucking up so bad where you’re concerned, but if you could give me just one more chance, I want to show you I’m not all bad.” Davy’s eyes were clouded with doubt. “Don’t say no. I’m begging.” Gavin pointed to himself. “And Gavin Walker does not beg. Ever. So here I am, begging for you to just give me this one last chance.”
Davy chewed it over for a minute. Gavin wanted to get up and pace but he continued to sit, pleading with his eyes. When Davy saw Gavin’s pouting lips he huffed an impatient breath. “I must be a glutton for punishment.” Gavin’s cheeks hurt from the force with which his smile stretched his face. Davy pointed at Gavin and continued, “Dude, this is your last time, though. I won’t let you keep playing me.”
Gavin was so pleased he couldn’t do anything but jump up and rush Davy with a kiss. It wasn’t heated, no tongues, just a quick press of their lips. He didn’t pull back, though, until he felt Davy relax and smile against his lips. Gavin sat back, smiling at Davy. “I won’t fuck it up.” At least I hope I won’t. Davy’s face said he was thinking the same thing. “So I’m picking you up after work tonight. You’ve gotta meet someone.”
Davy’s eyes got a little wide. “M-meet someone?”
“I promise he won’t bite.” Gavin gave the scout’s honor sign with his hand and started gathering his things. “Okay, I’ve got to jet.” He stood up, still smiling like a fool, and planted another kiss on Davy’s lips. He wasn’t exactly sure what the hell had gotten into him but he was diving into it head-first, not that that was any different than any other time. Except this involved emotions and messy things like feelings. Buthe wouldn’t dwell on that. “Pick you up after work!” Gavin didn’t give Davy any time to respond or himself time to second-guess as he jetted out the door.
Davy wasn’t sure what exactly Gavin had up his sleeve. In fact, he wasn’t entirely sure what the hell he’d been thinking agreeing to get any further involved with Gavin. He figured his earlier assessment of being a glutton for punishment was pretty spot-on. Something in the sincerity Davy had seen in Gavin’s eyes and heard in Gavin’s words had touched him. And that smile Gavin had given him was enough to make a guy weak in the knees.
What was it someone had said about Gavin? Oh yeah. The boy was trouble. Gavin had proved that assessment true over and over again but Davy just kept going back for more. It was those moments of vulnerability Gavin showed when he was around his friends, or when he was alone with Davy and had his I’m-too-cool-for-school swagger turned off. In those moments when Gavin’s smile was genuine or when he looked at Davy as though maybe Davy had the answer to all his questions, Davy just couldn’t help thinking Gavin was the most beautiful person he’d ever seen. Gavin’s charm was unparalleled, but the moments where he was just Gavin were devastating. Davy hadn’t been able to resist seeing him try to prove he wasn’t a huge asshole. Maybe if he had more of Gavin being himself, Davy feared could run away with his heart. And wa
sn’t that a scary fucking thought.
Davy finished his shift duties just around the time the new girl who worked night shift bounced in. She tried making conversation but Davy couldn’t keep up with her squirrelly chatter. He was tempted to see if throwing a shiny thing would make her run off in the other direction. Instead, he politely excused himself just in time for Gavin’s huge truck to pull up in front of the shop. He made his was outside and hopped into the passenger seat, getting a quick peck on the lips from Gavin. Davy wasn’t quite sure how to feel about Gavin’s sudden penchant for stolen kisses.
“How was work?” Gavin asked.
Davy gave shot him an exasperated glance. “Really? ‘How was work?’”
Gavin shrugged, looked hurt. “I was just trying to—”
“Trying too hard?” Davy wasn’t sure where the sudden bitchiness came from. Gavin winced, put the truck into drive, and silently pulled out onto the street. Davy was silent as they made their way back over the West Seattle Bridge. “Where are we going? Back to the beach?”
“No. It’s boys’ night at my house.” Gavin sounded sullen. Davy reached over and touched Gavin’s arm that was resting on the armrest.
“Sorry for being an ass, Gavin. It’s hard for me to figure out how to act on a normal day in a normal situation. This is far from that.”
“It’s cool.” Gavin didn’t sound convinced but he was smiling and shrugging all the same.
“No. That wasn’t nice of me. I said I’d give you a chance.” Davy wasn’t sure what else to say, but everyone knew people were not his specialty.
