by DeVere, Taya
The lid clicks loudly, then a millimeter at a time, begins to close. The sound of barking in her ears, Kaarina pulls frantically at the woman. As the lid starts pushing her own upper body down, she’s forced to pull herself out. Breathless, she spins on her heels, her panicked gaze scanning the room.
Several rows away, Doctor Solomon seems to be flowing forward, her feet hovering above the red floor. Steadily, she moves from person to person, sending a human wave across the hall as the people climb into their graves and lie down to sleep. Kaarina runs to the next pod.
A man in his sixties stares into space. Kaarina grabs his wrinkly hand, leaning into the pod. Shaking his hand, then pulling it against her chest. “Hey, hey, hey,” she says hurriedly, “What’s your name, Mister? Hey!” As the man closes his eyes, letting Kaarina hold his hand but ignoring her question, Kaarina gently slaps his bearded cheek. “Stay with me, okay? I’m going to get you out. This is not the way. Nobody deserves this… Hey!” She moves her hand to his shoulder, shaking a bit too roughly.
The man opens his eyes. Disoriented, he moves his head to stare into Kaarina’s eyes. “Who… who are you?”
Kaarina sighs sharply. “My name is Kaarina. Listen to me, we don’t have a lot of time. But I’m going to get you out of here. This place is bad. She is bad. She’s going to lock you into this capsule forever. Have you taken any pills? You might become this thing called a looper…”
The man shakes his head, interrupting Kaarina’s train of thought. He wets his lower lip, then gives Kaarina a little nod. “I have to… do this. Or I’ll kill them.”
Her head jerks back in surprise. A dog nose pokes against her thigh. “Kill? Who?”
“My wife… My two sons.” Something wet glimmers in his eyes. “I can’t keep a roof over our heads. My lungs… I can’t work anymore. Even if I did, it’s not enough to feed all four of us.”
Kaarina shakes her head and grabs his hand again, striking the back of his wrinkly palm. “That’s okay. It’s okay. There are… programs for this. We can get you help. I’ll help you. You can’t just give up, okay?”
His eyes move slowly from Kaarina’s left eye to the right and back. The faintest smile tweaks the corner of his dry lips. “It’s too late. There are no jobs for people like me. Like my wife. Doctor Solomon’s offer is the best thing that’s happened to us in a long time.”
“No.” Kaarina shakes her head fiercely. “No, it’s not.”
His lips twitch again. He pauses to gaze softly into Kaarina’s eyes. “There are worse things than death.”
“I know,” Kaarina breathes. “I’m looking at it as we speak. Listen, Mister. This… deal you’ve made with the Happiness-Program...”
His frown stops Kaarina for a moment, but then she continues. “Okay, the program is not yet launched. Doctor Solomon, the woman who brought you here…” Kaarina’s having the hardest time remembering what she’s learned about the Happiness-Program’s past. “Who does she work for again?”
Confusion shadows his eyes for a moment. “The Big Four. Of course. What other companies are left?”
The click sends both of their gazes to the pod’s lid. Kaarina leans in and places her hands under the man’s shoulders. “We’re running out of time. Let’s get you out, and we’ll talk more. Okay?”
The man stares at Kaarina, fear and confusion taking turns in his eyes. The lid purrs lower, making it hard for Kaarina to pull on the man. “Please, Mister. Please. Help me help you. Mister? Mister!” She yanks harder. Suddenly, the man pulls his arm out of Kaarina’s grip, sending her off balance. For a horrifying second, she feels her weight shift forward, and she loses her balance. She lands against the man inside the pod. The lid purrs and keeps closing slowly.
A strong nudge on her pant leg tells her the dog has joined her. Pulling on her pant sleeve, Kaarina’s canine friend sends her in the right direction—but not far enough. Kaarina grasps wildly with her hands, trying to find something to push on. The dog grabs hold of her again, this time at the hem of Kaarina’s T-shirt. When the shirt rips, the dog jumps in again, nudging Kaarina back with force. She falls backward, crashing down onto the floor. The lid clicks shut in front of her eyes.
Stumbling back to her feet, Kaarina runs aimlessly among the open pods. Most of the people don’t seem to notice her, but one woman turns her head as Kaarina approaches. Gray, fragile-looking eyes follow Kaarina—eyes too cloudy and tired for a woman in her forties. Kaarina grabs onto the pod's lid and stops to stare at the woman while getting her breath under control. Unsure what to say, Kaarina moves her head from side to side, desperately trying to find the words that’d convince the woman to climb out of her early grave.
“It’s okay,” the woman says with a soft voice. Her hand reaches for Kaarina’s white knuckles. After petting the back of Kaarina’s palm a few times, the woman gives her a gentle nod. “I want this.”
“It’s not what…” Kaarina starts, but the desperation cuts her sentence short.
“I know I’m not going to wake up again,” the woman says, her voice steady and gentle. “I know this will be my final resting place. That I won’t be dead, but not alive, either.”
“But… why?” Kaarina wants to hold her hand, but she can’t let go of the death-grip on the pod’s edge. “Why are you giving up? Were you… assaulted? Is your family starving? I can help you, whatever you’re going through.”
Her smile deepens. She shakes her head once, blinking slowly while staring at Kaarina. It looks like she’s fighting sleep, about to zone out. “That’s nice of you. But it’s not real.”
“Real? What do you mean?”
“What you’re offering.” The woman’s smile deepens, reaching her eyes. “Friendships, connections—built on pity or responsibility—aren’t real. I have many people in my life. Many so-called friends, coworkers, family members. I have a job with the Big Four. A house in one of the AR-cities. Food to eat. A purpose in life.”
“Then… why are you here?”
The woman pats Kaarina’s white knuckles one more time, then places her hand on her heart. She turns her gaze to stare at the dark ceiling. “What I don’t have is a genuine connection with another being. Someone who would actually hear me. See me. Feel my energy. And I’m tired of seeking that connection. I’m tired of feeling disappointed whenever I meet a new person, or finish a conversation. I can’t stand the guilt that follows. Who am I to think I’m somehow above them? Above what they find meaningful in this life? Self-driving cars. Shopper drones. Home-Helpers. VR gadgets and clothes for your avatar… It’s all too meaningless. Too… static. I’m starving inside, and no matter how much or what I consume, my hunger only grows. I can’t stand it anymore.”
The click is like a slap in the face, giving Kaarina a start. She takes a half-step back, looks around, and whistles. “Come here, boy! Where are you, boy?!” When Kaarina finally hears the distant sound of the dog’s claws click-clacking against the red floor, the pod’s lid is already half-closed. She pushes against it, trying to stop it from moving. But it lowers relentlessly.
“It’s okay,” the woman says once again, her eyes closed, her fingers folded. “It’s time.”
“No, listen!” Kaarina fights against the closing lid while gesturing for the dog to run over. He jumps up and places his front paws on the edge of the pod so the woman can see him. “Who says the connection has to be a person?” Kaarina rants in a panicky voice. “Look, see? Dogs are just as good companions as people! Better! You can get a dog! A cat! Get both! Just don’t give up on life, not like this…”
Only a few inches to go, the lid forces Kaarina to step back. The dog keeps his paws on the edge, staring at the woman, then looking at Kaarina, his ears pointing forward in question. When Kaarina suppresses a sob, then shakes her head, the dog jumps down from the edge, just in time before the pod’s whirring stops and the shining seam seals the woman inside.
Kaarina’s knees give in. She falls to the floor and covers her face in her hands. Some o
f the pods are still open. They are all loopers inside; people able to communicate. She needs to get up. Go talk to them. At least try and help them. But Kaarina’s limbs are heavy. Rooted on the red floor. The dog barks once, then nudges her demandingly with his front paw.
Her scream echoes in the hall, mixing with the echoing clicks as more capsules lock their long-term tenants inside. The dog circles Kaarina, whining faintly, stopping to lick her face, then changing directions and circling again.
The white lab coat is nowhere to be seen.
The floor is empty, the crowd gone.
Kaarina screams again.
***
The tiles flash by as Kaarina marches on through the constantly changing landscape of the city. Tall buildings, tile roads, people in different-colored overalls, stuck in the middle of the street with empty stares on their faces.
Refusing to listen and filled with rage, Kaarina blocks it all from her mind.
Markus’s pleading.
Margaret’s reasoning.
The dog’s restless barking and gentle nibbling on the back of her rapidly moving heels.
Changing colors, the buildings crash down around her. Blue building. Purple building. Green building. Crash, crash, crash. A cloud of dust swallows the people standing motionless beside the collapsing structures. Kaarina is engulfed by the dust as well, but just like the AIs and the dog her unconscious has created, she ignores it completely.
A glimmering blue building with a revolving door pulls her toward it. Just outside of the entrance, a young girl holds a nurse's hand, about to enter the building. The girl lifts her hand in greeting, staring at Kaarina in wonder. She’s staring at her bare feet in awe, Kaarina then realizes. She lifts her hand to wave back, but the girl is pulled into the building.
“Wait,” Kaarina breathes out. She starts jogging toward the revolving door, then sprints off at a full run. “Wait!” Still spinning, the door shines blue as Kaarina walks in, pushing the glass so it’ll move faster. Once inside, she looks around the lobby, then up at the corridors above. Narrow doors are lined up one after another. Metal signs with numbers decorate each door. It looks like a high-tech prison or a government facility of some sort. Maybe a storage area for AI gadgets?
It’s the Children’s Center, Markus says quietly. The one in Helsinki before they changed it to City of Finland… I think.
“Okay… and why am I here?”
No one says a word.
“Margaret? A CC for your thoughts?”
You ran. In here, Margaret says from her corner. Like a headless. Chicken. That’s why.
Ignoring Margaret’s reply, Kaarina moves to one of the two staircases that lead upstairs. With each step she takes, the stair beneath her vibrates slightly. “Are you running a hack right now?” she asks Margaret, her foot hovering above the next step, scared to keep going in case the place starts crumbling down.
I will. As soon as. I see. Something. Useful. This place isn’t. Marked. On your map.
Upstairs, the numbered metal doors strain against their hinges. Once Kaarina starts down the corridor, each door she passes rattles and creaks, then falls partly off its hinges. Swallowing loudly, Kaarina does her best to ignore the restless, eerie vibe this place has. What she’s looking for, she doesn’t know. But some kind of magnetic force pulled her here. It’s not the little girl. It’s not curiosity, either.
The Children’s Center can be an unsettling experience, Markus says carefully. Instead of joining Kaarina while she continues down the corridor, he’s stayed deep in his corner, quiet. Maybe we should head back. What’s next on the map?
Doors clatter and spit out hardware, falling sideways on each side of Kaarina. Once the floor starts swaying, threatening to send her off balance, she steadies herself by locking her gaze on the end of the corridor—a shining door that seems to pull her toward it like no other.
Seriously, let’s turn around. This place gives me the creeps.
Kaarina keeps walking, her eyes narrowing slightly.
Margaret, don’t you think this is a bad idea? I’m sure Nurse Saarinen is getting antsy because it’s taking us this long to find the Egg’s core. I mean, that is the task at hand, isn’t it? Not roaming around in collapsing buildings like this one.
Another door crashes down directly in front of Kaarina. She stops. Without looking down, Kaarina steps on the fallen door, walks over it, and continues to the end of the corridor. Once she makes it over, the door bangs from side to side, the handle moving up and down. The door starts breaking from the middle, numerous cracks traveling away from the center. A second later, pieces of metal crumble to the floor. The floor stops swaying. No rattling or cracking sounds fill the corridor.
It’s dead quiet.
Kaarina takes a careful step forward. Inside the room, a young boy wearing a baseball cap—maybe five or six years old—sits on the bed, staring into space. When Kaarina takes another step, the boy turns his head and looks at Kaarina, sadness in his eyes. His overgrown hair sticks out from underneath his Happiness-Program hat.
Fine. Stay. But I don’t need to be here for this.
Markus seems to go offline. Kaarina can’t feel his presence anymore. Margaret’s still there, observing the situation from her quarters.
“What’s wrong with Markus?” Kaarina whispers, waiting for Margaret to explain the strange behavior of her fellow AI. “It’s not like him to leave me like this.”
Not everything. Is about. You. Kaarina.
Frowning, Kaarina sends a disapproving glare at the spot where the wall and ceiling meet. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”
When Margaret doesn’t reply, Kaarina takes a few more steps in the direction of the boy. She stops a meter away. After blinking twice, the boy turns his gaze to stare at the wall again. His hands rest on his lap, palms up. Lips slightly parted, he seems to be somewhere else entirely, though he’s clearly acknowledged Kaarina’s arrival.
Ask him. What his name. Is.
“Hey there,” Kaarina says, nervous cheer in her voice. As soon as she’s done it, she curses the awkward way she talks to the boy. Talking to kids is one of the many skills she never learned.
The boy looks at Kaarina. A soft smile on his lips, he waves back, then moves his head forward again to continue his empty staring.
“My name is Kaarina…” She shifts her weight, wondering if it’s okay to sit on the bed beside the boy. “What’s your name?”
“Markus,” the boy says without looking at Kaarina. “And you can sit next to me if you want. I don’t mind.”
Baffled, Kaarina holds her breath but sits down next to the young Markus. It’s him. Of course it’s him. Kaarina should have recognized the soft, friendly eyes anywhere. Even in a simulation, or cyber-reality, whatever this is. But how is he here? It can’t be part of Kaarina’s unconscious—she didn’t meet Markus until later in life, so she wouldn’t have a memory of him. He’s not a looper, either, but an AI living inside Kaarina’s mind. Is this Markus’s memory?
It’s not. His memory. Nor is it yours. It’s part of the. Happiness-Program. Data. Margaret seems to have found a second wind. Just keep. Talking. I’m getting. Something. This might be. The weak link. We’ve been looking. For.
“How did you…” Kaarina starts but swallows her intrusive question. Instead, she gives the boy a smile, crossing her legs to sit more comfortably. “Do you want to play a game?”
This gets his attention. His friendly eyes now locked with Kaarina’s, he gives her a small nod. “Like a blood draw?”
Her head jerks back in surprise. Controlling her facial expression is hard, but Kaarina keeps her cool. “I was thinking more like a riddle. Or maybe truth or dare. You have any good secrets you’d like to share with me?”
The boy shakes his head once, confused. “We are not allowed to keep secrets. Secrets are bad. They ruin the relationship between the nurses and us.”
“I see.” Kaarina scratches her head, thinking hard. “How about I tell yo
u one, then? Would that be okay? Not against the rules?”
After a moment of thinking, the young Markus moves to sit with crossed legs like Kaarina. He gives her a nod.
“Okay great. Here goes.” After a smile, Kaarina tilts her head and gives the boy a quick grin. “I’ve met you before. Not here, but somewhere else. We had the best day that day. Yeah, I told you a joke, and you laughed and laughed and laughed. The sky was blue and we sat in that park for hours, just chitchatting and telling bad jokes. I even let you touch my scar.” Kaarina touches her cheek, briefly running her fingers on the scar traveling from her cheek to her collarbone.
“What’s the secret?”
Kaarina leans forward a bit and lowers her voice. “The secret is that you are the nicest, smartest, loveliest person that I’ve ever met walking on Earth.”
The boy looks puzzled. His investigating gaze is interrupted when the floor around them changes. It seems to first melt, then turn into restless waves with whitecaps. Kaarina swallows loudly but keeps her eyes on the boy. “Now, your turn. I don’t need to hear a secret, but I do have a question.”
The boy stares at the swarming floor with wide eyes. Without looking up at Kaarina, he asks, “What is your question?”
“Where are your parents? What happened to them?”
The bed creaks and sinks slightly into the floor. Kaarina keeps smiling at the boy, hoping that ignoring what’s happening around them will soothe the boy rather than agitate him.
“I don’t remember,” the young Markus finally answers. “All I remember is that the blue coveralls came to take me away, and wouldn’t let me bring Kasimir with me.” His eyes are wide, honest. He mirrors Kaarina’s pose, leaning slightly forward. When the bed bucks again, sinking deeper into the floor, he gasps for air.
