by Ava D. Dohn
* * *
Into a raging vortex of blinding, colored lights and screaming sounds the golden chariot raced. Ishtar watched, fixated on what her senses were gathering, horrified with fear and yet overwhelmed with amazement. Zadar remained calm, with a hand gripping the chariot’s rail and his other arm wrapped firmly around the girl. Time seemed to stand still, and all direction faded into nothingness. On and on the driver charged, calling for his steeds to hurry while cracking a whip over the tops of the animals’ heads. Was it minutes, days or years? Ishtar could not tell. She lost track of all time and distance, finally surrendering to her waiting fate.
At length, the chariot began to slow. A brilliant white glow grew in its majesty until they were flooded in its blinding magnificence. Ahead, Ishtar saw more of Yehowah’s fearsome, fiery Cherubs. Strange they were, with fiery wings...sometimes two, four or even six. Each was dressed in golden armor and each carried a huge sword. Out from these stepped a six-winged creature, a giant among the Cherubs, cloaked in black and chrysolite. On his helmet were inscribed the words, ‘Great is the Glory of God’. Extending his hand, he shouted for the driver to halt.
Reins were pulled hard and horses reared as they came to a sliding stop. The driver cried out, “Behold the house wardens of the one and only True God! Give honor and praise to the Almighty and Giver of Life so that you may continue to live!”
At that, all the creatures shouted out in song:
“Oh, give praise to the Most High and bow down to his Greatness.
How loving and kind is He to all those showing Him love.
Do bow low and live, for God is merciful and kind, slow to anger, willing to forgive.
Do be careful to not lift up the anger of God.”
The song was repeated three more times before the creatures fell silent. Their leader spoke up again. “Only those of pure heart may enter! The wicked and unworthy will perish in fires of disgrace! What say you to this?! Will you stand before the Great and Fear-Inspiring Lord of All Things?! Is your heart pure and empty of all wickedness, wantonness, and envy?!” His eyes bored into Ishtar’s, silently waiting for a reply.
Ishtar quietly cried out to Zadar, “I shall die! How can I answer him when I don’t know my heart?! God will strike me dead!”
“Let him judge your heart.” Zadar softly replied. “Tell him your desire a pure heart, but lack wisdom and knowledge as to the depth of your holiness.”
“I’ll die! I’ll die!” The girl whimpered.
Zadar calmly asked, “Won’t be the first time, will it? What’s the fuss?”
Ishtar’s eyes flashed in anger. The instant she realized what she had done, she begged his forgiveness. Zadar chided, “You’d better hope that fellow didn’t see how you acted. Now speak up and tell the Cherub what I said. Don’t allow his impatience to grow.”
The creature stepped forward, glaring down at Ishtar. She blurted out, “I… I am a foolish thing! I don’t know what I am! What good am I?!”
The creature stopped, confusion growing on his face. After several seconds of thorough examination, he declared, “So you choose for God to judge you? Whatever He may choose to be your fate, He will choose! Your life is now resting in His loving kindness.” He backed away, calling to the keepers of the doors, “She has chosen to cast her fate upon the mercies of the Great King! Open the doors and let her live or die!”
Zadar stepped down from the chariot, his white dress uniform glowing with a shimmering iridescence while a rainbow of colors danced through the threads. “Come! We must hurry! God has little patience for slackers!” He exclaimed, pulling Ishtar toward the opening doors. At that instant, the other Cherubs again took up their previous song. They were still enthusiastically echoing those words as the two large, heavy doors slowly closed, leaving Zadar and Ishtar alone in a quiet antechamber, facing two more golden doors.
After another long wait, with a ‘snap!’ and then a laborious groan, the two ornately inscribed panels started to open. When the entrance was wide enough for a person to squeeze through, the doors suddenly stopped moving. From far inside a darkened hall, a thundering voice called out, “The man with the inkhorn, the one who judges good and bad, awaits word from the officer charged with the child’s training! To be found acceptable or condemned in all the duties assigned you concerning the child, come forward to be judged worthy of life or death!”
Zadar turned to Ishtar and, with growing trepidation, smiled, saying his goodbyes. “I go now to the Fates. Soon I will know the reward for my labors. Should we not meet again, let it be known that you are innocent in what may become of me.” He squeezed her hands, released them and slipped through the passage. Instantly, the doors slammed shut.
The chamber suddenly became colder, or at least it felt that way to the girl. Her hands started shaking uncontrollably and sweat formed in beads that ran down her face. Beyond the sealed compartment, rumbling thunders shook the very floor upon which she stood. One deafening crash after another followed by the muffled eruption of angry expressions filled Ishtar’s ears. And then silence – deathlike still - silence. Ishtar believed her heart would burst because of her overwhelming anxiety.
Another lifetime passed before the girl heard the snapping noise of locks, releasing heavy panels twisting on massive hinges. Gradually the giant wings unfolded outward, revealing an impenetrable pitch-blackness. Ishtar shook so badly her teeth were chattering and her knees knocking.
Once again the thunderous voice from within commanded, “Enter! Stand before your God!”
Somehow Ishtar managed to make her feet move. First one step and then the other…one and then the other, ever so slowly, she managed to move from the antechamber into the blackness beyond. As soon as she had cleared the doors, they slammed shut with a deafening crunch, the girl crying out in terror, the sound of her voice echoing to and fro across the darkened void.
The echo gradually faded away, filling the blackness with numbing silence. The beating of the girl’s heart hammered at her senses and her labored breathing became deafening. Still nothing. She slowly turned around, hoping to find solace in some tiny beam of light. There was none to be found, even from the entrance doors. Ishtar was all alone with no sense of direction. Even time became lost to her.
Just as her tears began, just as she was resigning herself to a most unfortunate fate, a luxuriant emerald green light ignited high above the girl’s head, growing in brightness until she could see an immense, vaulted expanse, immeasurable in its height and breadth, spreading out and down until reaching the floor, which began to burn with the blueness of a frozen sea - a crystal ocean. Ishtar was mesmerized by the sights surrounding her.
Ear-splitting trumpet blasts shattered the oppressive quiet, shaking Ishtar awake. The girl cowered, covering her aching ears. Over and over again, heralds sounded horns, until the girl thought her head was going to explode. She closed her eyes from the throbbing in her brain, crying out in pain.
The trumpets stopped and all became quiet again. The pain in Ishtar’s head drifted into memories and vanished. She opened her eyes, letting out another cry, this time at unbelievable sights.
Hovering around and above the indescribably beautiful crystal sea were myriads upon myriads of winged creatures. Rank upon rank, column upon column, for as far as the eye could see - these glorious creations stood as one massed throng. Then, as if in one great voice, the multitude broke out in song.
“Holy! Holy! Holy is the Great and Wonderful Councilor,
Full of love and full of mercy and kindness.
Bringing good gifts to those who love Him.
Bringing to nothing any not knowing his love.
Give Glory to the One having such love
So that He might look with mercy upon you
And not deliver you up to death.”
When the chorus completed singing, other thundering voices called out in unison, this time to the girl stan
ding below.
“How does one dare to stand in the company of our God?!
Fall down to give honor to the Great King,
So as not to make his mercy short, that you should die!”
Ishtar glanced up to see four gargantuan, winged creatures. Each had four faces: that of a bull, an eagle, a lion, and a man, representing power, insight, justice, and love. And they would turn each face as they expressed that particular quality of God. The girl fell flat, burying her face in her hands, shaking as she groveled on the floor. The creatures swooped down and, adding new verses to the song, continued to chant words of warning and adulation to the child. Finally the beating of their wings decreased as they flew back toward the ceiling and the room eventually quieted again.
Another voice thundered across the limitless expanse, “Rise! Stand before your God!”
Shaking from terror, Ishtar somehow managed to push herself up onto her knees and finally stand on her feet. She looked toward the sound of the voice and, to her astonishment, beheld a glorious white throne, floating high above the crowds. Around the throne, the four creatures flew, chanting over and over again:
“Holy! Holy! Holy! Bless the true God and live!”
From her position far below, Ishtar could only see the blinding light radiating from inside the throne. At that moment, the multitude of the winged crowds and the four creatures along with the newly appeared council of twelve older men all broke out in rhapsodic melody, praising and glorifying God. As the song continued, the giant white throne gradually settled down toward the crystal sea, slowly revolving in circles while doing so. It finally came to rest in front of the girl, facing away from her.
A voice called out from the middle of the throne, “Prepare to see the person of God! Great and wonderful is he and full of loving kindness!”
The throne began to rotate until facing the girl, blinding light radiating from its center continuing to obscure the face of God. Flames of fire and beams of searing energy shot out from the person seated in the royal chair as the chorus reached a deafening crescendo. As if on cue, the songs abruptly ended. At that instant, the fiery brilliance emanating from the throne faded.
Ishtar found herself staring into the very face of God, her shock profound. The girl’s world began to spin around, turning into a dizzying, kaleidoscopic array of blinding colors. Just before Ishtar lost consciousness and fainted dead away, she shrieked, “Lowenah!”
