by A. M. Brooks
“You heard all that, huh?” I turn back to my locker and shove my book in a little harder than necessary. Should I go tell Ciaran? My mind reels, trying to figure out what to say. Winter doesn’t come off as vindictive, but for all I know, she could be the loudest mouth in this school. As much as I don’t want my identity known, I don’t want to be associated with Ciaran even more. I’m almost thankful the jerk let me out before we got to school this morning. It doesn’t take a genius to know that Ciaran is a big deal at Savage Lakes High. I felt the shift the minute those boys approached me outside. He wears his crown in the form of messy blonde locks.
Instead of answering directly, she winks. “You are definitely attracting attention on your first day.” Her eyes glance past me. My eyes follow hers and collide with a pair the color of caramel. White teeth are framed by pouty lips and set in a narrow, bronzed face that is surrounded by waves of an even richer, chocolate brown hair. He looks like a damn dessert served on the beach. My eyes travel over him, picking up on the confidence he carries, before pausing when I notice the letterman jacket folded over his muscled forearm. My eyes narrow.
“Yup, not doing that again.” I whip back around to face her and laugh.
“Bentley Rhodes,” she sighs his name, as if it’s a curse and a prayer in the same breath. “Have you dated a footballer before?” Winter grins conspiratorially.
“Kind of,” I shrug. “It’s a long story.”
“Good thing we have lunch together then.” Winter smiles, and I find myself letting my guard down a little. I really hope my decision won’t kick me in the ass later, but something tells me it won’t. I get a vibe from Winter that she knows more than she lets on and that she’d keep the darkest of secrets for her best friend. My heart flips under my ribcage when Oaklynn’s face flashes in my mind. I bite my lip to distract myself from the pain it causes.
“See you later,” Winter calls, as she heads into the classroom across the hall from mine. My head nods to acknowledge her. I’m not even sure how I made it to the classroom, but I did.
It’s chemistry and pairs of two are already set up around the room at the various lab tables. I find the only empty station in the back and set my bag down. My eyes widen when I notice Reed, from the electronic store, sitting at the one across from me.
“Hey,” I call out to him. His eyes dart to mine then back down, without saying anything. “Okay,” I mutter to myself under my breath. I’m not really surprised, though. There was nothing about Reed that screamed friendly and outgoing.
“Don’t take it too hard,” a smooth voice sounds next to my ear. My eyes turn and land on the guy from the hallway, Bentley, I think Winter said his name was.
“Do you see tears in my eyes?” I ask, not bothering to mask my hostility. Red flags jump around in my brain. He reminds me of Nash, which is something I want nothing to do with anymore.
A smirk kicks up his lips, and his eyes gleam like I just threw down a gauntlet. “Not yet, but I can think of a few ways to have you crying for me.” Great. He’s one of those guys.
I feign my most innocent face. “I—”
“Bentley!” A shrill voice calls out from the other side of the room. His body doesn’t move while my eyes peek over his shoulder. The Queen B of the school stands by an open lab table, one hand on her hip. Her jeans fit tightly, the top barely brushing a cropped Country Girl, teal long sleeve tee. She’s pretty, with her make up done up. Her blonde hair is pin straight and falls just above her collarbone. It’s her emerald eyes, though, as they shoot daggers at me that really let me know she thinks she rules this school. And, if I had to guess, she also believes I’m trying to move in on her boyfriend over here. At this point, everyone in the classroom has stopped what they are doing and are now paying attention to the three of us, just confirming what I already knew.
Shaking my head, I lean closer to Bentley. “She looks pissed. If I had to put money on it, you’ll be the only one crying tonight,” I tell him, before sidestepping and sitting at the empty chair next to Reed. I could care less if he talks or even acknowledges me the rest of the school year. I keep my gaze trained forward, on the chalkboard, ignoring the chatter and curious looks, and pretending not to see when Bentley sneaks another look at me.
“I don’t want a partner.” Reed finally opens his mouth.
I shrug. “Me either, but I also hate sitting alone,” I tell him. His lip jerks like he might crack a smile, before he turns away from me. Not until the teacher walks in and goes through attendance, do I feel like my body finally relaxes.
The hour passes by quickly, and I hardly learned anything new. Some of the classes here are covering material I learned earlier in the year and some of it is material my school covered last year. I spend the majority of my time discreetly watching everyone else. Almost the entire class is football players or cheerleaders. Except for myself and Reed. I now understand why he has been flying solo.
After waiting for the class to empty, I finally pick up my book and head back to my locker. Winter is already leaning next to the door when I walk out. “Took you long enough,” she mutters, while drifting next to me.
My eyes dart around the halls, taking everything in. “It was crowded,” I shrug, “Might as well let them all out instead of getting smashed in the door.”
“I heard you pissed Cassidy off already.” Winter smirks and turns her face toward me.
My eyebrow lifts. “Is that the blonde with Bentley on her shit list?”
Winter laughs. “I think he’s always on her shit list.”
“How romantic,” I reply, shoving my books inside the cramped space.
“Lunch, right?” Winter asks, and I nod. She leads me back through the hallways to an open area in the front of the building. I’m pretty sure when I passed this space earlier, it was set up for a study hall. We get in line, and I stack my plate with salad, Cutie mandarins, and broccoli cheddar soup, before following Winter across the room. A few other students are already there, sitting at the table. They give me the same polite smile as everybody else. One of the girls asks Winter a question about their English project, and I take the time to survey the room. I immediately pick out Reed. He’s, once again, sitting by himself at a table, his leg sprawled out, and he’s reading a book. I chuckle to myself, before moving on. The loudest table, of course, belongs to the football crew. Bentley sits next to Cassidy and all their friends are hanging around. A few people are even standing and eating because there aren’t any chairs left.
My eyes drop down to my food, and I take a few bites before it starts. Warm currents of energy course through my body, and a flush heats my cheeks. I’m being watched. Closing my eyes, I take a deep breath before lifting my head. Ciaran’s eyes meet mine, and a tidal wave of emotion crashes against my chest. His gaze is hypnotic. I meet his challenging glare with a tilt of my head and watch his nose flare slightly. He’s thoughtful while he studies me, and I don’t miss the flash of heat in his gaze either. It causes another round of fiery tingles up and down my spine, curling my toes inside my boots. When a girl with cherry red lips leans over and whispers in his ear, that flicker of heat vanishes along with any warmth I was feeling. My eyes drop from his, but not before I see the victorious curl of his mouth.
“You okay?” Winter asks quietly, nudging me with her arm.
“Yeah,” I answer, looking up and noticing the others are all staring at me.
“Addy asked what side of town your family moved in to.” Winter repeats the question that had been directed at me while I had been in a sexy stare down with Ciaran.
“Uh, the other side of town,” I half answer to be safe. It’s not technically a lie.
“Same as me then,” Winter answers, before asking one of the guys about the game this coming Friday. I send her a small smile, thanking her for taking the focus off me. I’m in no way ready to open up and start divulging my life, especially if it means people knowing I’m living with Ciaran.
My spoon dips into my soup right when
the energy in the room shifts again. The buzz quiets down, girls turn to look and a few people hunker down lower in their seats. I can feel it, too. Anger rolls through the cafeteria in the form of a bulked-up, dangerous looking guy with a head of black hair in a crew cut and a gaze that could kill. Chills run down my spine. My eyes meet Ciaran’s again briefly, before he turns as the other guy approaches his table. It’s then I notice Kai is also with him. Without meaning to, I’m pulled into his stare. I can feel the hatred in those orbs as they pierce my face. Recognition suddenly hits me full force. “Condom guy.”
“Wait,” Winter whispers next to me, “You know Silas, too?”
I turn to face her, right as the guy, Silas, turns toward Kai and Ciaran. I’m forgotten for now. My body sags a little from the tension dispersing. “Not really,” I answer. Her face morphs with confusion, so I quickly tell her about my lake side run-in from last week. By the end of my story, Winter is howling with laughter.
“It was not that funny,” I chastise her, while trying to keep my mouth from smiling. “It was disgusting.”
“Oh my lord,” she breathes heavily and fans her face, “I wish I could have seen that.”
“You’re no help,” I tell her and turn back to my food.
“I’m sorry,” she chuckles again. “It’s just so damn hilarious. You do realize who they are, right?”
I turn toward her, and our eyes meet, but I refuse to answer. I know who they are, but I don’t exactly know everything about what they do.
Winter sighs. “Have you ever been to juvie?”
I laugh. “What? No.”
“Watched Orange is the New Black?”
“No,” I answer again, smiling this time.
“Okay, well we’re going to use jail as a metaphor anyway. Just like on TV. We’re all the inmates. Some were born to be here, and some were placed here for being in the wrong area at the wrong time. There’s a hierarchy system inside.” She points toward Bentley’s table. “They’re like white collar criminals who are here to do their time and are most likely leaving here without worry. Almost like royalty.” She lifts her chin to another group. “Those guys over there would be your cyber hackers. Anything with electronics and gaming, they’re you’re go to. And those couple tables in the back are the everyday civilians who are here for petty crimes or sleeping off being intoxicated. Our table would be gang related. We do better in a group and have each other’s backs.”
“What about him?” I nod to Reed, right as he walks past us to dump his tray. The sharp intake of breath across the table puts me on alert.
“Reed is…” Winter’s voice trails off, “he’s the Hannibal Lector of the place. Insanely smart but very, very scary.”
“He won’t actually eat you, though,” the girl from earlier puts in. I should probably learn her name.
“Okay and what about Ciaran’s table?” I finally ask.
“They don’t belong in the jail,” Winter tells me, her eyes hardening a little. “They’re the wardens.”
“What?” I question, chuckling.
“I mean it, girl, their job is to make sure the school runs smoothly. Their parents and families pretty much own and run the town as well. They’re the originals in the families who work for Rogue,” she answers, scooting closer to me, so that only I can hear.
“I call bullshit but thanks for the tour.” I laugh again.
She shakes her head. “Listen, Ariel.” I can’t help but notice the way she drags my fake name out, and her voice lowers. “Ciaran, Silas and Kai are best friends. Their families are really important in the community and to a lot of the kids who go to this school. No one messes with them. They literally control everything here. If they told me to stop talking to you, I would have to.”
“They can really do that?” I ask quietly. I’m already isolated and alone. I don’t know what I would do if Ciaran actually did that.
“They won’t, but they could,” she answers. “They can act sweet as pie to your grandma then turn around and be a deadly force to an enemy and that’s why we call them the good ol’ Midwest boys.”
My eyes fly around the room, taking it all in. Winter’s words have shaken me, and I’m starting to really wonder about where Matt has brought me. The days we spent in the motels and on the road flitter through my mind. Pieces of conversation mingle with memories, and the walls in my chest feel like they might close in.
“You’re like me,” I breathe out, so that only Winter can hear me. I barely notice it, but her head moves in a silent yes. “Is everybody?” I ask, picturing all the people I’ve met today already.
“No,” she answers, a small smile pulling at her lips. “You’re not supposed to be able to tell who is or isn’t.”
“Why are you telling me then?” I ask, turning to face her again.
She shrugs. “Let’s talk later, yeah?” Her eyes slide to the others at the table, and I fake a smile at them, before tilting my head in a nod to her.
The rest of lunch passes in a blur. My mind scrambles to accommodate my new reality. I knew Matt was bringing me some place safe. I knew it was also the location of his business. Ciaran, right away, warned me about keeping a low profile, and Kai handed me fake IDs and a bank card. All of that should have been warning enough that I was stepping onto dangerous ground. I feel like I landed on a mine field with no way to navigate to safety. Except, I also don’t know what safety is.
Without my permission, my eyes find Ciaran in the crowd, as he’s walking away, flanked by Kai on one side and Silas on the other. The girl with the red lips and one of her friends also trail behind them. A surge of possession crawls in my chest. I push it down and squeeze my eyes shut. He hates me. Ciaran knows about my family and why I’m here. Even though I catch fire whenever we look at each other, he will never see past my family, and I shouldn’t want the attention of another boy who can’t do that. I learned my lesson with Nash. All that relationship got me was shunned by my peers and alone on my birthday.
With only three more classes left after lunch, the afternoon creeps by. My knee bounces under my desks, and I spend most of my classes doodling in my notebook. I can’t concentrate and won’t even pretend that I’m trying to. I think about everything Winter told me on loop. My head is a broken record that I can’t fix. I need more answers.
When the final bell rings, I bolt from my seat, ignoring the people around me, and book it to my locker. Quickly, I shove a few books and papers into my bag, before racing to the front entrance. I have no idea how Winter gets to and from school. I stand on my tiptoes, trying to find her in the crowd. My body gets jostled and bounced around a few times, and I’m apologized to again and again, even though I’m the one holding up the flow of traffic. I’m about to admit defeat when I finally catch sight of her raven curls. She soon sees me and waves over her head, motioning toward a different door. Right as I change direction, my body collides into a mountain of muscle. I jump back, ready to apologize, when he cuts me off. “Watch where you’re going, Trash,” Silas grits out between his teeth.
“I’m sorry,” tumbles out of my mouth before I can stop it. He just insulted me, and I apologized. “Look dude, I’m sorry about the lake okay. I didn’t see much. Next time, don’t pick a public place if you plan to be naked,” I rattle off, proud of myself for my voice not shaking. In my peripheral, I see Kai turn his head, choking back a smile. The two girls from earlier both wear angry frowns, before turning to each other, probably trying to figure out who the girl was at the lake, since it wasn’t either of them. I can feel Ciaran burning a hole in the side of my head with his gaze, but I refuse to look away from Silas. Judging by the intensity of his gaze, he has no idea his buddy and I already had one run in.
Silas’ face masks any emotion, his eyes narrow, and he bends down to look me straight in the face. “I could care less about what you saw at the lake. The only problem we have right now is that you’re in my way, taking up air, and doing what you do best…being a waste of space.”
My heart tightens at his words. He shoves past me, soon followed by Kai and the girls. There is no other way to describe Silas other than evil. What I have seen so far of Ciaran is mean and cold. Silas is in his own bracket of uncaring. My cheeks turn pink, and I have to bite my lip to distract myself from the tears that are gathering in my eyes. Where did all this hate and hostility come from? I turn to face Ciaran. I want to ask about the damage my dad created for Silas’ family. Nothing else about his actions makes sense otherwise. He won’t meet my gaze, keeping his eyes on Silas and Kai. And with Silas’ hateful words and Ciaran’s glacial demeanor, another crack in my armor forms.
I’m vaguely aware of the snickers and oohs that sound around me. I’m already a spectacle, and it’s only day one. So much for laying low. I wonder briefly if this is what Ciaran meant when he told me not to draw attention. It isn’t other students I have to watch out for, though, it’s Silas.
“Let’s go.” Winter takes my arm and leads me to the parking lot. My lungs take in the fresh air greedily. My hands wring together while I fight to keep an anxiety attack at bay. I hate this. I hate feeling weak.
“Can you take me home?” I ask her, the minute we get to her car.
“Of course.” She nods, and we both get in. We sit for a few minutes while I fight to get my composure back.
“Sorry,” I tell her.
“You don’t need to apologize.” She shakes her head smiling. “I can’t believe that just happened. They aren’t supposed to engage. Silas made that way too personal.”
“He pretty much just made me the least liked person in school, didn’t he?” I ask, even though I already know the answer. The tight pull of her lips is all the confirmation I need. “How is that even allowed?” I say more to myself than her.
“It won’t last,” she replies. “Matt will intervene, and you’ll just end up being invisible rather than rejected.”
I blow out my breath. “I’m not sure that’s any better. I just wanted to make it through the rest of this year and get my life back.” I also didn’t want a repeat of my previous school, but I’m already heading down that same path. I didn’t intentionally set out to provoke Silas.
