by K. K. Allen
Wayne looked over his shoulder at Shane. “She’s hurt, babe. Give her some time. I’m sure she’ll talk to Sebastian when she’s ready.”
But even knowing Wayne was right, that I was hurt and too upset to hear Sebastian’s side of things, I wasn’t sure I could ever get over the sight of him playing tonight. He was so in his element. So happy. And he deserved every second of that, no matter who was dancing below him.
“Maybe he didn’t know you weren’t out there,” Shane threw out. “Is that possible?”
I nodded as a glimmer of hope sparked in my chest at the idea, but it deflated just as quickly. “It still doesn’t change the inevitable. He’s staying. I’m going.”
“Why are you going? Did Dirk even give you a reason?” Shane asked.
I nodded, but something about the vague conversation with Dirk after my run-in with Claudette was irking me. “Well, yeah. It had to do with the accident. The doctor said the odds of something like that happening again, given my history, were likely. Dirk said he didn’t want to take that risk with his production.” I shrugged. “I can’t argue that, but…”
“What is it, Kai?” Wayne scooted forward and took my hand.
I sighed. “Sebastian and I didn’t tell the doctor about what happened when I was younger. When I woke up, he warned me against divulging any details, just in case it got back to Dirk. Yet Dirk seemed to know everything.” My eyes floated to Wayne’s as my chest ached. “You don’t think Sebastian told him, do you?”
Wayne’s eyes drifted away as his mouth hung open. He looked at Shane as they shared some kind of mutual understanding, then Wayne looked back at me with an expression I would never forget—guilt, shame, apology. He always wore his every emotion on his face, and that moment was no exception.
“You didn’t,” I said because I already knew.
Wayne’s face completely crumbled as he placed his head in his hands. “God, Kai, I’m so sorry.” He shook his head. “Dirk came up to me in the waiting room of the medical center after I saw you. He seemed so concerned but didn’t want to disrupt you. I-I told him everything.” He looked up, the face of a traitor staring back at me.
But I knew my best friend more than anyone, and even in my heartache, I knew he wasn’t to blame for this epic disaster.
“Don’t beat yourself up.” I swallowed and stood, folding my arms across my chest. “Dirk would have found a way, with or without you.”
Wayne stood and wrapped his arms around me. “I’m so sorry. You don’t deserve this shit. If I find that guy, I’m going to give him a piece of my mind.”
Shane met my eyes. “I know you don’t want to talk to Sebastian, but maybe he can shed some light too.”
“I’m starting to lose hope that there’s any light left.”
Wayne squeezed me then pulled my face into his hands. “Don’t say that. You’re Kai. My Zelda. You never give up.”
More tears pooled in my eyes, threatening to drown me. “What happens when there’s no other choice?”
Wayne let out a breath followed by a small smile. “There’s always a choice. You just have to open your eyes to see it.”
I wished Wayne and Shane’s words could have lit a fire in me, like on the night I made my final decision to get on this damn boat. But I was feeling more defeated than I ever had before. A couple hours later, I splashed some water on my eyes and decided the time had come to face my fate.
“Guess I better go pack.” I gave them a sad smile and accepted hugs meant to comfort me. Instead, I felt only sadness as I trudged through the halls and down the back staircase to my cabin.
As soon as I got to the space between Sebastian’s room and mine, I stared at his door first, the ache in my chest expanding. I knocked three times, waited a few moments, and knocked again. The lack of response added weight to my already sinking heart.
When I pushed my way through my door and flipped on my light, a flood of emotion swarmed my chest. Sebastian was there, sitting on my bed with his head down. His strong arms were locked, and his fists were pressed into the mattress on either side of him. He looked exhausted, like me, but his eyes lit up when he saw me.
He rose from the bed so quickly that my heart spiked in my chest. Then he was in front of me, filling every broken piece of my heart with his presence. His arms wrapped my body, and he pressed his forehead into mine. “I’m so sorry about tonight. I didn’t know.” He pulled his face away to lock eyes with mine. “I had no clue Dirk was going to pull that shit with Claudette.”
I tried to swallow the lump in my throat before shaking my head. “I shouldn’t have assumed the worst.”
His eyebrows bent together. “I would have never set foot on that stage if I knew.” His eyes searched mine. “I don’t want any part of Angst and Grace if you aren’t part of it. You need to know that.”
I sucked in a breath, my first deep one in a long time, and my lungs expanded as hope filled them along with his words. “So now what?”
He took a step back, reached for his leather jacket, and handed it to me. “Put this on. I’m taking you somewhere. And then I’ll explain.”
Chapter 42
Sebastian
Midnight was nearing by the time we entered the crew’s private pool deck. I winked at the deck hand I’d paid off earlier to keep the area clear for me and threw a hand out to shake his. “Thanks, man. I really appreciate this. Sorry we’re so late.”
Ferenc bowed in thanks. “No problem at all, sir. Enjoy your evening. I’ll make sure you two aren’t disturbed.” He took a step inside the sliding door just before it closed.
I’d met Ferenc in the crew bar one night and learned of his three kids and wife back home in Hungary. He’d begrudgingly left his family behind for seven months to ensure they were given a great life. Slipping him a little extra for the sake of his family felt good.
“After you,” I said to Kai with a smile.
She laughed. “I don’t know where I’m going.”
I tipped my head then threw a glance toward the private balcony hidden by the wall of blue glass. “Yes, you do.”
Her face lost some of its color, and her mouth fell open some. “Sebastian, I haven’t faced the water at night yet.” Her gaze was locked on the stairs. “I don’t know if I should.”
I took her hand. “We’ve gotten through all your other fears, haven’t we? I’ll be with you. Besides, I didn’t really think about that when I put together the surprise I had for you.”
She smiled that shy Kai smile I loved so much. Usually, she acted tough and impenetrable, and I loved that she gave me the vulnerable bits.
“Okay, fine. This better be good,” she said.
With an amused and curious glance at me, she climbed the stairs and froze with a gasp at the mazelike entrance to the balcony.
My arms wrapped around her from behind as I reviewed my handiwork from earlier in the night. Holiday lights wrapped the balcony. Long-stemmed roses were scattered over the deck. Jazz music floated from a portable speaker. And on a small round table with two lounge chairs situated on either side was a bottle of chilled white wine and a covered dish of assorted desserts.
Her jaw had dropped by the time she’d done a slow circle and looked back at me. “W-what did I do to deserve this?”
I held out a hand, and she took it without a moment’s hesitation, then I led her to the balcony, swiping a rose from the table on our way. I wrapped my arms around her, loving the smell of my leather mixed with all things Kai—her hair, her skin, her strawberry bubblegum spray that always clung to my sheets long after she’d slipped out of them. She was intoxicating in every sense of the word.
“When I set all this up,” I said, “it was obviously before all the Dirk and Claudette drama. I just wanted to tell you how proud I am of you. For taking this job on and kicking ass at it.”
She placed the rose against her nose and inhaled deeply.
“When I first created the role of Grace, I had this image in my head. But for some reas
on, no one felt right in the role. Not even Claudette.”
Kai threw me a questioning look. “Really? But everyone says she was the perfect Grace.”
I nodded, wanting desperately to word my thoughts in a way that spoke the entire truth even though it was hard to say.
“I thought so too at the time. But looking back, I know now I had it all backwards. Grace was inspired by my dream girl, a mold no one could ever fit into.” I pressed my lips to Kai’s temple. “Until I found you.”
“Wow,” she said, a smile lighting up her face. “To think, a little over two months ago, I wasn’t even your type.”
I grinned and pressed my lips to hers. “You’re such a smartass.”
She giggled. “And you’re kind of a softie. Should I alert the media?”
I shrugged. “You can do whatever you want as long as you stay mine.”
She melted into my last kiss, and I would have stayed there kissing her forever if reality hadn’t been growing heavier as each moment passed. How could she ever stay mine when I was leaving tomorrow?
All this joking and flirting felt so right, yet I knew Kai wouldn’t feel the same way when I told her about the arrangement I’d made with Dirk.
When she faced forward again and her eyes swept over the horizon, silence stretched between us, and everything became eerily calm.
“You see the way the moon’s reflection dances on the waves?” She didn’t wait for me to respond. “When I used to sail with my dad, I thought the lights looked like cut diamonds lost in the sea. It was so beautiful at night.”
“It still is.”
She nodded. “It makes me miss sailing. Nighttime on the water was always my favorite.”
“Nighttime on the water.” I repeated her words while slowly rubbing the length of her arm as I replayed the words in my mind. “Sounds like a song title.”
She grinned. “You should use it for your new musical.”
I shrugged, not hating that idea at all. Nighttime on the water. “Actually, I might just do that. Now that I’m going to have some time on my hands, I might actually finish it.”
She swiveled to face me, her face twisting with confusion. “You mean because I’m leaving the show? Did I distract you that much?”
“No,” I said with a laugh. “That’s not what I meant at all.” I cringed. “That came out all wrong. Actually.” I tightened my hold on her. “I have some good news for you.”
“You do?”
Nodding, I brushed aside a strand of hair that kept sticking to her skin. “I talked to Dirk and worked things out. You get to stay on as Grace.”
“Wait. What?” Her eyes bulged, and she squealed. “Really?”
When I nodded, she jumped into my arms, planting a kiss directly on my lips. “This changes everything,” she said through her laughter. “I was so scared and mad.” She was shaking with emotion, her insides practically bursting with happiness. “What about Claudette?”
I waved a hand in the air. “As of tomorrow, she’ll be gone for good. I made sure that was part of the deal.”
“What deal?”
My heart hammered away in my chest as my words halted in my throat. This was it… the moment I’d been dreading. “Kai, there’s something I need to tell you.”
Her expression transformed almost instantly, like she knew what I was going to say before the words even formed in my mind. I didn’t know how to tell her I’d just promised to give up seven years of hard work in exchange for Kai to stay on as Grace.
“Why do I hate the sound of what you haven’t even said yet?”
I sighed. “Because you know me so well.”
“I do.” Her eyes searched mine. “You made a deal with the devil.” Kai’s eyes narrowed into a glare. “You did, didn’t you?”
I slammed my eyelids together and nodded.
“So what were the terms? Exactly how much did you and Dirk decide I was worth?”
I swallowed hard, knowing I couldn’t win in this scenario. “You’re worth everything, Kai. That’s why I’m handing over Angst and Grace to Dirk. So you can stay.”
“No.” Her face turned ashen, depicting her horror.
I lifted my hands in surrender. “Dirk can have it. I just want you.”
Her mouth fell open, and emotion pooled in her eyes. “But this is your musical, Sebastian. You’ve worked so hard to hold onto it.”
“And it was great while it lasted.”
She straightened, her face contorting with pain. “You really expect me to stay here and work for Dirk? I don’t want any of this without you.”
I sighed. “I’m going to stay in LA. We’ll see each other every week. You deserve that role more than anyone.”
She crossed her arms across her chest. “It’s a done deal? You already signed it away?”
Shaking my head, I let out another heavy breath. I didn’t want to admit that the thought of signing those papers was killing me, but it was, a little bit. Not because I didn’t want to let go of it—I was more than ready for that—but to leave it in Dirk’s hands, of all people.
My stomach churned in its acid. “Tomorrow. We have a meeting with our lawyers in the morning.”
“Where? Can I come?”
I had to think her question over for a second, but in the end, only one answer made sense. “Since your contract is part of the arrangement, I suppose you should be there. We’re meeting in the theater at nine.”
She nodded, her bottom lip quivering even while her entire demeanor seemed to grow stronger, like she was preparing for battle. “I’ll be there. Don’t sign anything without me.”
Then she backed away, turned, and left without a word.
Chapter 43
Kai
My eyes burned from lack of sleep. My body ached from nonstop movement. My brain hurt from having spent the past nine hours strategizing a way out of the mess Dirk and Sebastian had created. But even while feeling like I’d been hit by a bus, I was sure of one thing: Sebastian Chase was not going to sign over Angst and Grace to Dirk, no matter how badly he wanted to save me.
Angry muffled voices greeted my ears as I pushed my way through the backstage door—voices that became louder and clearer the farther I walked down the hall. Jimmy, Dirk, and Sebastian were there, but I couldn’t make out if anyone else was. The ship had docked in LA hours before, so anyone could have joined them.
I passed the row of dressing rooms and nodded at my fellow cast members, who were lingering in the hall. From their wide eyes, focused toward the stage, I assumed they’d been listening in on the latest Sebastian and Dirk feud.
Focusing on the mission at hand, I entered the crossover section at the back of the stage and took a quick glance at my phone. Nine o’clock. Right on the dot. I peeked between the slit in the curtains. Two men in dark-gray suits were sitting together like fans at a ping-pong match as they watched the angry grown men. Jimmy sat opposite them, while Dirk and Sebastian sat at the heads of the table. Spit was practically flying between them.
“No,” Dirk barked. “We already went over the details last night. Our lawyers aren’t here to mediate. All you need to do is sign the damn papers, shake my hand, and walk right on out that door, not stopping until you’re off this ship.”
“We could,” Sebastian started through gritted teeth, about to completely lose his cool. “Or maybe there’s another solution we haven’t thought of.”
The sound of metal scraping violently across the floor set my hair on end. “Absolutely not!” Dirk exploded.
I burst through the curtain, afraid the men would get too heated and ruin the meeting before it had even started. “Aren’t you two tired of fighting by now?”
“What the hell are you doing here?” Dirk spat out.
I shivered. If I’d ever had an inkling of a thought that I could carry on in Angst and Grace with Dirk at the helm, it vanished at that instant. And I wasn’t the only one who felt that way.
“I invited her,” Sebastian snapped back, his eyes
darkening.
Dirk’s eyes narrowed on him, and he leaned so far across the table that he almost cleared the edge of the other side. “And who gave you the right to make that decision?”
Sebastian shrugged. “It’s Kai’s right. Not yours, not mine. She has every right to be here, considering it’s her role we’re discussing like it’s a bargaining chip.”
Dirk’s head swiveled to face me with a sneer. “It’s not enough you’ll get to stay on as Grace, is it? You need to fight your boyfriend’s battles too?”
Sebastian threw his head back in frustration and then shook it. “Jesus, Dirk. Aren’t you tired of being angry? Of talking in circles? Of disagreeing all the damn time?”
“Look, you little punk.” Dirk’s face was bright, bright red. “We had an agreement. So don’t accuse me of talking in circles. This is business.”
“It’s not just business,” I cut in, letting my voice carry to the front of the stage. “This isn’t just about money or the rights to a musical. This is about people’s lives—people you hired who have families to support and reputations to uphold. And whether you like it or not, we have voices too.”
Dirk rolled his eyes as he made some type of hiss-laugh through his teeth. “Yeah, well, you can scream all you want, but you don’t get a say. Just like you didn’t get a say the night your daddy disappeared. You know,” he said with a cock of his head, “it’s a mystery to me why you ever stepped foot on this ship to begin with. Your boy must have been very convincing.”
My chest was boiling at this point, and I couldn’t keep my distance any longer. I took two long strides forward, and Sebastian met me in the middle, ready to prevent me from clawing at Dirk’s throat.
“Whoa, Kai.”
I was sure rage was evident in my face.
“Take a breath. Don’t let him get to you.”
I shook my head and exhaled, then I nodded at Sebastian. “It’s too late for that. But I’m okay.”
