Because there was no more space at the table, she planned to eat in the galley, as she’d done plenty of times before Swain changed the rules. After giving her captain his plate, she retrieved her own from the galley and went to the table to fill it, listening in to conversation and commenting as she scooped food onto her plate.
She had to go to the top of the table to reach the last dish and to her surprise, the minute she put the spoon back in the green beans, a thick arm circled her waist and she was pulled onto the bench at the top of the table.
It took her a minute to realize she was sitting next to Swain, and when she did, she looked up at her captain who did a double take when he noticed her attention was on him.
“What’s the rule when I eat?” he asked, his volume low.
“I eat with you.”
“Beside me,” he said and went back to his conversation with Foist.
It was a tight squeeze up there at the top of the table. The bench was wide, but Swain was a big guy. The heat of his thigh pressed into hers and she kept her elbows tucked in because she didn’t want to battle him for space when he was giving up some of his sacred position to her.
Stuart was peering at her and her captain, Karen was gawping, but the crew didn’t seem to care. Swain was saying something to his engineer about lubrication, while Swing was regaling the guys on his side of the bench with tales of the girl he’d spent the night with.
There was terror coming and Sassi would have to leave the bosom of this group soon, but for the moment, things were just about perfect.
TWENTY-SEVEN
The captain ordered everyone to bed not long after dinner. Sassi guessed it had something to do with the alcohol the men had brought with them. She was grateful that Karen wouldn’t have to experience the crew being drunk on her first night aboard.
Sassi had spent some time with Karen in her cabin, reassuring her about her safety while Stuart was in the head. When her brother emerged, she said goodnight to them both and stepped into the passageway just as Swain jumped down the last of the starboard stairs from the direction of Foist or Jockey’s cabin.
“Everyone settled?” he asked when she pulled Karen and Stuart’s cabin door closed.
“Yes,” she said. “Thanks again for letting them stay.”
“Plenty of room,” he said, checking the door to the outer deck was locked tight.
They started down the passageway side-by-side. “The crew have been great. Really understanding.”
“That’s what loyalty is,” he said.
Just when they got to the mess door and she was about to say goodnight, he closed his hand around the back of her neck and guided her past the door. “Where are we going?”
“You think I’m going to let you sleep in the mess?” he asked, stopping her a few feet away so he could reach inside to kill the lights and secure the door. “I saw you take a pillow from the locker earlier.”
“Where am I going to sleep?”
It was obvious where they were going when he returned to her and put his hands on her shoulders to push her to the opposite end of the passageway.
“Where you always sleep on Eros,” he said and took her up the stairs into his cabin. “If there’s a chance of assault, only our strongest members are allowed to sleep in cabins alone.”
Diplomatic of him not to call her weak. Her amusement died when he pulled off his tee-shirt and sat on the edge of the bed to remove his boots.
“Dario’s never threatened to hurt me,” she said. “In fact, I’m probably the safest person on board. I could sleep on deck and know he’d never send his men to hurt me… not seriously.”
Sitting up, he straightened his arms behind him to lean back, his weight on his hands. “You said you didn’t want him to hurt me.”
“Right,” she said, hoping that Swain wasn’t implying she had the power to help him if Dario’s men swooped in and there was a physical confrontation.
“What is it Dario wants with you?” he asked. “What’s the first thing a man does with his wife when they’re alone?”
“On the wedding night?” she asked, going over to sit beside him, thigh-to-thigh though there was plenty of space on the bed for her to sit further from him. Blinking her eyes up to his, she moistened her lips. “Sex.”
“Shit, Waif, that sultry fucking tone of yours does a guy in, you know that? I don’t blame this guy for wanting you so much.”
That was a mood killer. Sassi was about to stand, but her captain bowed to block her, capturing her lips with his to stop her from leaving the bed. Not only that, but he used the force of his kiss to lay her down on the bed she’d thought she’d never be in again.
Swain kissed her for another minute before his hand snaked up beneath her hoodie to seek her breast. “You wouldn’t kiss me on deck,” she said when he gathered up the fabric and lifted her torso to take her top and hoodie off at the same time. “Were you mad at me?”
“Oh yeah,” he said, standing up to pull off her jeans and panties. “I’m mad as hell, Waif.”
He picked her up beneath her arms and dragged her to the top of the bed. Unhooking her bra, he tossed it away before he opened her legs and settled himself between them.
“I didn’t want to hurt you,” she said, skimming her hands up and down his back as he kissed her face and neck. “I thought I’d draw a line under us and then go off to deal with Dario and you’d never have to know anything about my father’s debt, or Dario’s demand.”
Swain stopped kissing her to glare at her instead. “I told you never to think of him when you’re with me,” he said. “He is the one you were talking about in your cabin downstairs, isn’t he?” She nodded. Stroking her waist, he made her shiver, then took her breast in his hand to massage her, ratcheting up her need. “You never belonged to him, Psyche. You never wanted to be his.”
“No, Captain, I didn’t,” she said, her belly swirling with heat that seeped into the blood rushing through her. Her whole being was begging to be filled with the endorphins of pleasure his body promised hers.
“That means you’re still mine,” he said, taking her hand, he pressed it flat to his pec. “Unless you tell me otherwise.”
“I’ll never tell you otherwise. I’ll always be yours,” she murmured. He didn’t need to trick her into submitting or to manipulate her by reminding her how much she loved his body. Sassi wanted to be his, she’d always wanted to be. “Even after I sign my name next to his, I’ll be yours.”
“Psyche,” he said, shifting to rest his forearms in close by her ears to finger the hair on the top of her head. “You’re going to be free. I’m going to make it my life’s mission to make sure you are never made to do anything against your will. I won’t let anyone crush that spirit of yours and I sure won’t let any man put his hands on you.”
In anger? Is that what he meant or more? Even this close his eyes still looked as black as the night, and she could understand how someone could get the wrong impression of this man who appeared so intense. Sassi couldn’t feel anything except gratitude and confidence when she looked at him.
“You’re an incredible man, Captain Swain.”
One side of his mouth lifted for a brief second. “We’re not gonna have sex,” he said.
Disappointment smacked her hard. He’d kissed her, stripped her naked, and laid her down in his sheets. She hadn’t thought about how much she wanted to feel him inside her or how she might make that happen. With the insistence of his dick hard against her, she had assumed that she was about to get laid.
“Okay,” she said. “Good. Phew.”
Rolling off her, Swain lifted his hips to take off his pants. He adjusted the erection in his underwear and kicked the blanket down. “Shift, Waif, it’s hot tonight.”
He reached over his head to switch off the light. “Not hot enough,” she muttered. They lay together, side by side, in the dark. The sound of the water lapping on the hull helped her to relax and she already knew this was going to be the best nigh
t’s sleep she’d had since the last time she’d been in this bed. “Give me your arm.”
Sassi sat up and he extended his arm toward the spot she’d vacated. She scooted over to tug it under her head so she could lay back down, putting her head on his upper arm. He coughed once, and bent his elbow, bringing his hand over her breast to fondle her.
“Your tits feel good, Waif. I’ve missed those.”
If he wanted her to seduce him or force him into sex, he’d be left wanting. Sassi was too stubborn, even though being intimate with him sounded like heaven. If her captain wanted it, he could have it, but she wasn’t going to beg.
Turning her head up, she couldn’t see him, but had to ask, “Stuart didn’t say anything stupid to you, did he?”
“About us?”
“No,” she said, “about—”
“Drug smuggling.” Groaning, she tried to sit up, ready to apologize every way she knew how. But, Swain strengthened his arm and held her down. “Your stories prepped me to deal with your brother, Waif. Don’t worry about his big ideas.”
Snuggling closer, she was so pleased he wasn’t offended by her brother’s idiocy. “Least he didn’t hit you with a chair.”
“I wish he’d tried,” he mumbled.
So he could defend himself? Maybe her captain wanted to knock her brother out. Stuart could be persistent. If he brought up the drug thing, Swain would’ve smacked him down. But, if Stuart had kept twittering on about it, Swain’s patience would’ve been tested.
Her twittering on about it might not be the best idea either, so she changed the subject. “Do you want pancakes for breakfast or donuts?”
“Both,” he said. “Are you doing bacon?”
“If you want,” she said. “You’re the captain, you get anything you want for breakfast.”
“Do I get breakfast in bed?”
His humid breath cascaded through her hair. Although her body’s need for him grew, she tried to play it cool. “Pussy bar’s open any time you want to chow down.”
Squeezing her breast once, he let his fingers gather around her nipple to brush and tease it to an aching point. “Don’t doubt that, Psyche. If I wanted it, I could have it.”
Laying a hand over the erection still pulsing in his boxers, she tightened her grip around him. “Oh, you want it, Captain, don’t even kid yourself.”
Picking his hand from her breast, she climbed onto his body and covered his chest in kisses. “I don’t want your gratitude, Sassi,” he said, his voice cold when he pushed her off him and over to the corner of the bed.
Swain turned his back on her to lie on his side. That was when she figured out his reasoning for the sex embargo. She could reassure him, argue and tell him that she wanted him and no one else. But, it wouldn’t be fair to play games with him when Dario was her future.
Licking her lips, she shuffled over to him and stroked a hand down his arm then kissed his shoulder. “I am grateful,” she whispered. “But, I’m in your bed because I want to be, no other reason. I’ve never been happy anywhere else like I am here with you.”
Kissing him again, she was happy that he tucked her arm under his and pulled her chest against his back. “Goodnight, Waif. Go to sleep.”
Sighing, she consoled herself with being this close to her captain. “Goodnight,” she responded and closed her eyes.
Tomorrow she’d have to deal with Stuart and to convince them all that it was time to let her go to Dario. The sooner she could go to him, the sooner her friends would be safe. But, tonight, she was in her safe place, and this was the closest she’d ever get to happy ever again.
Breakfast was her specialty. Sassi had left her captain asleep in bed and gone to the mess to prepare for the stampede of crew and family that needed fed.
When they were on the water, Swain was awake before her. That day, she’d been the first up, ready to do whatever was necessary to help everyone out. Jockey confirmed he’d put in her order for supplies and let her know they should be arriving later that day. Swain had been around to overhear the conversation and told her not to accept the order without one of the crew with her.
He wasn’t worried about her capability, he was worried about her being alone and vulnerable. But, there was no time to dwell on his concern. The crew went to work on the captain’s orders. Sassi gave Karen a tour of the ship, and Stuart stayed in bed until after lunchtime.
That was roughly about when Swain lost his patience and marched into her brother’s cabin, hauled him out, and gave him a list of duties to complete. If there was one thing her captain couldn’t abide it was laziness. Stuart sort of started to object, but when the crew closed ranks behind Swain, he’d shut up and jumped to fast.
After everyone had eaten lunch and Stuart was helping Fidget with his jobs, Swain left the ship. She hadn’t realized he’d gone at first, she was cleaning up in the galley. But, she’d asked Jockey where he was and been told their captain was in town.
That must have been three hours ago, and he still wasn’t back.
With all the activity on the ship, Sassi craved some peace and solitude. But, her captain had an aversion to her going outside. Instead of going on deck, she climbed through their cabin’s overhead hatch to sneak into the wheelhouse.
Lying on the long side of the settee, she’d been half asleep for a while. It was probably time for her to think about dinner. But, she’d already rolled the meatballs and made the sauce, so it wouldn’t take long to get the meal ready and she didn’t want to start until the captain was safe aboard.
She had been so lost in her own slumbering thoughts that she didn’t hear anyone approaching before he spoke. “What you doing up here all by yourself?”
Relief made her smile, her captain was home. “Fantasizing.”
“About what?”
Sassi kept her eyes closed, basking in the moment. “About being on the water,” she said, taking a deep breath. “I’m imagining that we’re out there on the ocean, just the crew. You and me had wild, incredible sex last night and we’re going to do it again tonight… I’m thinking about making dinner, hoping you’ll like what I cook and that my dessert pleases you… It’s just us out here in the middle of the ocean… nothing around for miles.”
“Is that a fantasy or a memory?”
“A fantasy,” she said, still in her sleepy state. “Because there’s no Dario, no time limit, no worry and pressure. Just me, my captain, and the ocean.”
When he didn’t speak, she let her eyes flutter open. He was bent down, gazing at her, resting his weight on his forearms that were folded on the side of the booth. “You paint a pretty picture, Waif.”
Climbing onto her knees, she shuffled toward him and curved both hands onto his forearms. “Take me out, Captain,” she whispered, trying to kiss him though he resisted. “Let me have the water one last time… Cast off and steal me from reality… right now… please.”
“No,” he said and had no trouble backing away from her.
Noticing a huge khaki bag on the chart table, she guessed he’d come up here for an operational reason, not a personal one. “I don’t understand what I’m doing here,” she murmured, trying not to become petulant, though she felt overwhelming frustration. Swain turned to her. “Sitting on my ass doesn’t help anyone and if the end goal is me going to Dario then why the hell am I wasting your time here? Why shouldn’t I just go to him now? This minute?”
“You’re not going anywhere near him,” he snapped. “Never again.”
Life wasn’t a fantasy. Swain seemed to be building a perimeter around her that no one was allowed to breach. While it might be welcome where Dario was concerned, it wasn’t welcome everywhere.
“I’m not allowed anywhere near you,” she said, clambering out of the booth and stalking aft to put some space between her and him. “Sometimes you kiss me, sometimes you can’t have me far enough away. If it wasn’t for the reaction your dick has to me, I’d think you were playing some sick game with me.”
When she
got to the windows at the back of the wheelhouse, she turned to lean against the rail that ran around the wall of the room, resting her hands on it at her sides.
“We’re irrelevant,” he said, marching over. Apparently, he wasn’t happy with her creating distance. “You said it yourself downstairs in the mess. Our feelings don’t matter, keeping everyone safe matters. I won’t let myself get distracted.”
Sassi didn’t have his willpower. She wanted to. She wanted to be stubborn and focused and have his resolve. Instead, she felt like she was falling apart, and the more she crumbled, the more she needed him to pull her together.
Toying with him, she leaned in to pout at him. “Do I distract you, Captain? I’m not sure I do.”
“Waif,” he exhaled and crouched to get in close.
Picking up her hands, he guided them to his shoulders and scooped his arms around her waist to pick her up and perch her ass on the rail she’d been holding onto a second ago.
The tenderness in this slow kiss gave her more of an answer than she’d expected. It was so deep and probing that moisture seeped between her sealed lashes. Running her fingers into his hair, she held his mouth to hers and coiled her legs around his hips to lock her ankles at his lower back.
This was a public place to be making out, but they were at the end of the dock, so there weren’t many people near the aft of the ship. Though any of the crew on the quarterdeck would see that the captain had her pressed to the wheelhouse windows.
“Let me be with you,” she said, trying to squeeze her hands between them to unfasten his pants while his mouth worked on her neck. “One last time, please.”
Maybe that was what really held her back from defying him and going to Dario to end this on her own. She wanted to be with her captain once more, to make one more memory with him before she had to give herself to Dario.
Sweet Seas Page 25
