‘Okay.’ I laugh against his chest.
‘If you want kids with me,’ he says, anxiously. ‘I’m not saying we must have kids if that’s not what you want. It’s not my intention to turn you into a baby machine or something.’
‘I know, Aiden. And I do want kids, you know I do. I can’t imagine anything cuter than a little baby Aiden running around the place.’
‘Or a little baby Orla.’ He kisses my nose before squeezing me tight and lifting me off the floor. ‘Oh, and I’ll need your help decorating, if that’s alright. You know what I’m like. I’m used to living under canvas and spending my time in bird hides. If it’s left up to me, everything will be khaki.’
‘Khaki?’ I splutter with laughter.
‘Yeah, it’s a great colour for camouflage. Especially useful for hiding from beautiful reporters who come to interview you when you’re bird-watching in the woods.’
‘Well, I suppose I’d better supervise you then, hadn’t I?’ I laugh as he kisses me. ‘I can’t have you painting your walls khaki!’
‘I think you better had.’ He rests his forehead against mine, and we stand for a few moments, wrapped in each other’s arms. I could stand like this for hours without registering how much time has passed.
‘I love you, Aiden Byrne,’ I say softly.
‘I love you too, Orla Kennedy.’
And just like that, the promise of a future opens up. And though there’s a lot to sort out, I believe that Aiden and I can make this work. I can no longer say that our lives are incompatible. I can no longer dismiss Ireland as somewhere that’s out of reach. Aiden and I stand a chance, and with a bit of compromise and flexibility, I’m convinced we can make this work.
Epilogue
Five years later
‘Mummy, look at all my shells?’
‘Wow, Daisy! You’ve found so many!’ I smile down at my 3-year-old daughter. Her curly blonde hair spirals around her head in the sea breeze as she bends to tip her prized shells out onto the wet sand.
‘Nanny helped.’
‘Good old Nanny.’ I bend with some difficulty, my huge pregnant belly getting in the way as I poke through the shells with my finger. The baby’s due any day now and I feel heavy and cumbersome.
‘Are you okay, Orla?’ Mum walks slowly towards us, her bare feet leaving prints in the wet sand. I can’t believe she’s taken her shoes off to walk in the surf. The September sea is freezing! ‘I’ll take Daisy if you want to go back and lie down. You must be exhausted.’
‘Well …’ I shrug; it’s true, I am exhausted, but I’m also enjoying the fresh air. I woke up this morning feeling not too good, and the salt air is reviving me a little. ‘I might go back in a minute.’
Mum smoothes back Daisy’s hair as she bends with us to inspect the shell haul. ‘We did well, didn’t we?’ she says in a bright voice. ‘Shall we see if we can find some crabs in the rock pools?’
‘Yes!’ Daisy begins scooping her shells back into her pink sparkly bucket, before taking Mum’s hand and heading off up the beach. ‘Bye, Mummy!’
‘Bye, darling.’
Mum turns to look over her shoulder. ‘We won’t be long. Go back home and have a lie-down.’
I watch them walk up the beach, hand in hand, and feel a wave of love. It’s so lovely that my mum is getting to spend time with my daughter. Keeley is away at university now, and I get the feeling Mum is suffering empty-nest syndrome.
‘Orla!’ I hear my name carried on the wind, and turn to see my husband coming towards me. ‘What are you doing down here?’ he asks, as he gets closer, his eyes full of concern. ‘I thought you weren’t feeling well.’ As soon as he reaches me, his arms go round me, and he kisses my forehead.
‘I needed some fresh air,’ I say, covering his hand with my own as he rubs my stomach. ‘Mum’s taken Daisy to look in the rock pools.’
Aiden turns to look down the beach to where two figures are small now.
‘Right, well, let’s get you home then.’
‘I’m fine, Aiden. You don’t need to worry.’
‘I do need to worry. You know how fast Daisy came! I don’t want you giving birth on the beach.’
It’s true, Daisy did come fast. The midwives at the hospital couldn’t believe it when I delivered twenty minutes after arriving on the ward. As she was my first, they’d expected me to be in labour for hours. This time, we’re going for a home birth and Aiden’s got the midwife on speed dial.
‘Okay, I’ll come home now.’
Dry sand is always difficult to walk on but, but today it’s harder than ever. I’m seriously regretting my decision to come down to the beach as I stop for the third time to catch my breath. Aiden waits patiently as I cling to his big warm hand with both of mine and lay my head against his arm. My stomach tightens ominously, painfully, and suddenly I know our new baby will be born today.
‘It’s starting, isn’t it?’ Aiden says in a voice that betrays his nerves.
I nod as the contraction passes. ‘It wasn’t a bad one. It will be a while yet.’
Aiden gives me a look that says he doesn’t believe me, then takes out his phone to ring the midwife. Gulls wheel and circle in the grey sky and the waves crash behind us as we reach the top of the beach. It’s a relief to be back on firm ground, but then I remember the steep hill we have to climb to get home. Aiden obviously thinks the same thing.
‘Shall I run and get the car?’
‘No, don’t leave me!’ I gasp, holding onto his hand as tight as I can.
‘Okay, okay.’
We wait for the contraction to pass before starting the ascent up the hill. The leaves on the trees are taking on the copper and gold hues of autumn, and they’re suddenly illuminated by the sun poking through the clouds.
‘There you go!’ Aiden says, forcing himself to sound joyful. ‘The sun’s come out to welcome our new baby.’
‘Yay,’ I say, forcing myself to sound equally joyful, despite the fact I’ve got to walk up a massive hill to get home and am terrified of the impending labour.
I’ve done this before, I remind myself, I can do it again.
‘This is probably a good thing to do,’ I pant. ‘It’s good to be active in labour. It makes it easier, apparently.’
Aiden’s brow is creased with worry, but he tries to smile. ‘Yeah, let’s hope it doesn’t make it faster than last time. Christ, I’m so glad I came to get you when I did.’
‘Me too.’ I stop walking as another contraction wracks my body. Aiden holds me, rubbing the small of my back in circular motions. I’m so grateful he’s here, so solid and warm beside me. Even if I have this baby right here, right now on the side of this narrow country lane, at least Aiden will be here with me.
The contraction passes and we start walking again. The baby feels low in my pelvis, pressing downwards. I feel a sort of popping sensation, and a trickle that turns to a flood of warm liquid. ‘Oh! My waters just broke.’
‘Oh God!’ Aiden starts to panic. ‘That midwife better be on her way! What if she gets held up? What if I have to deliver the baby myself? I don’t know what to do!’
‘Aiden, shh, shh.’ I reach up and put my hand on the side of his face. ‘We’ve done this before, remember. We can do it again. I know what I’m doing.’
He holds my gaze, and I see the panic dying in his eyes, though he still looks frightened, especially when another contraction takes over and I lean into him, breathing through the pain.
‘I’m supposed to be timing these,’ he says, looking at his watch. ‘How long was that? They seemed really close together. We’re only halfway up the hill!’
There’s a beep and a red Toyota pulls up alongside us. ‘Looks like I was just in time,’ says a cheerful Irish voice.
‘Oh my God, am I glad to see you!’ Aiden says, sagging with relief when he sees its Raine, our midwife. ‘I thought I was going to have to deliver this baby myself by the side of the road.’
‘No need for that. I’m here now. Jump in and I’ll w
hizz you up the hill to your house.’
‘My waters just broke,’ I tell her. ‘I don’t want to get your seat wet.’
‘No matter, there’s a plastic sheet in the back, just sit on that.’
Aiden opens the rear door and lays out the sheet for me to sit on. Two minutes later we’re back at home.
‘Now what were you doing down that beach?’ Raine scolds as she gets all her stuff ready for me to deliver. The contractions are coming so fast now they almost run into each other.
‘I just needed some air.’
‘Open a window next time! Come on, let’s examine you and see how far you’re dilated.’
I lie on our bed, while Aiden crosses to the window. ‘Yes, it’s a bit of a recurring theme, really. Orla denying she needs help.’
‘Hey! That’s not fair. I’m not denying anything, I just wanted a walk on the beach.’
‘What if I hadn’t come and got you?’
‘Mum was there. She would have phoned you.’
‘She was about half a mile away when I got there.’
‘Oh, you’re nine centimetres already!’ Raine says, interrupting our bickering. ‘This baby will soon be here.’
I hold my hand out to Aiden, and he crosses over and takes it.
Half an hour later, Poppy Anne Byrne enters the world, red faced and screaming, and Aiden cries when he holds his second child in his arms.
‘Another girl!’ he says, looking at her in wonder. ‘We’ll have to keep trying for a boy.’
‘No chance! I’m never letting you near me again, Aiden!’ But we’re both laughing as he leans across and kisses me.
‘Well done, Mrs Byrne,’ he whispers. ‘You’re a goddess. I love you so much.’
‘I love you too.’
‘I suppose I’d better phone everyone and let them know the news,’ he says, getting up from the bed and passing Poppy back to me. I gaze down at my new daughter’s soft round cheeks and half-closed eyes and feel so much love I’m almost knocked sideways. Her tiny perfect fingers wrap around my thumb as I latch her on to my breast for a feed. Raine watches to make sure she’s feeding well before she leaves.
‘I’ll call in tomorrow, just to check in on you,’ she says, gathering all her stuff together, ready to leave. ‘Just call if you need anything.’
‘Thank you.’
She goes downstairs and I hear Aiden letting her out and thanking her profusely for arriving so quickly. Soon after, the door opens again, and Daisy’s high-pitched excited voice floats up the stairs.
‘Well, Poppy, it looks like you’re about to meet your big sister,’ I murmur. She’s fallen asleep feeding, so I unlatch her from my breast and prepare for the onslaught of three-year-old enthusiasm.
‘I’m sorry!’ Mum opens the bedroom door and peers round as Daisy pushes her way past. ‘I tried to keep her away as long as possible but she overheard me on the phone and twigged the baby had arrived. Not much gets past her, does it?’
‘No, it doesn’t.’ I laugh as Daisy clambers onto the bed with me. ‘It’s fine. Daisy, say hello to your baby sister, Poppy.’
‘Hello, Poppy,’ Daisy says in a hushed voice. With her little knees on either side of my legs, she peers down at the baby intently. ‘She’s very red!’ she observes.
‘So were you when you were first born!’
‘Was I? Was I cute?’
‘You were very cute. And you’re still cute now,’ I say, kissing her nose. ‘Here, Mum,’ I say, tipping Poppy so my mum can see her better. ‘Would you like a hold?’
‘Oh yes, please.’ Mum’s eyes fill with tears as she takes Poppy and sits on the end of my bed. Daisy follows her with her eyes, but then throws her arms around my neck, nestling closer for a cuddle. Gathering her warm body to me, I kiss her rosy cheeks, inhaling the smell of the wind and the sea in her soft golden hair. ‘I can’t believe you had her so quickly!’ Mum says. ‘You were only on the beach an hour ago!’
‘I know. It’s a good job Aiden came when he did. And the midwife, for that matter. I thought I was going to give birth by the side of the road.’
Mum shakes her head, clearly overwhelmed. ‘I’ve phoned Keeley. She wants to come at the weekend, if that’s okay?’
‘Of course. She can sleep in the cob house like last time.’
The cob house is finished now and resembles the kind of cottage you’d expect to see in a fairy tale. It’s got a thatched roof and warm butterscotch walls, and round windows that twinkle in the sunlight. We use it as a guest house, and Aiden’s documentary was such a resounding success that we’ve had people from all over the world asking if they can come and stay in it. Aiden’s in talks for another series.
With hindsight, it’s easy to see that I should have given up my manky flat and moved to Ireland immediately. I’ve never been happier than I am now, and life just keeps getting better. I was sad to leave my job and my friends in London, but I got another job on a newspaper in Dublin and still write a regular column about moving to Ireland and setting up home with Aiden Byrne in the countryside. People have loved where my life has taken me over the years, and I even get the odd message from readers telling me I’ve inspired them to make a leap they might not have made if they hadn’t have read my column. Sometimes, the responsibility weighs heavy on my shoulders. What if they’ve made the wrong choice? What if they’ve got the wrong man? There aren’t many as good as Aiden Byrne in this world.
For me, I knew all along I had the right man. I just needed to be sure he was willing to stay in one place and lay down roots.
The bedroom door opens and Aiden appears with two mugs of tea and a beaker of juice for Daisy.
‘Err, do you want the bad news?’ Aiden says, looking shifty as he puts the mugs down on the bedside cabinet and passes the juice to Daisy. My heart stills.
‘You’re going away?’
‘No!’ He looks appalled that I could even think such a thing. ‘Orla, we’ve just had a baby. Why would I go away now? No! My family’s on its way round. The whole bloody lot of them!’
‘Daddy!’ Daisy says. ‘Daddy said a bad word!’
‘I’m sorry, sweetheart!’ Aiden picks Daisy up and kisses her. ‘Naughty Daddy! Yeah, so they’re coming round now, even though I told them not to.’
‘That’s okay,’ I say easily. ‘You’re on tea duty though.’
‘That’s fine. You can stay up here and rest if you’d rather. You’ve been through enough today without having to listen to that noisy bunch.’
‘Don’t be silly. I love your family, you know I do.’
He rolls his eyes. ‘So do I, but I wish they’d come one at a time rather than en masse. It wouldn’t be a problem, but Uncle Jeff and Auntie Lynne were round at Mum’s when I phoned, then they phoned my cousin Patrick, and he’s working nearby. And I’d already phoned David, so …’
‘Is David coming too?’ I move to get out of bed, wincing at how sore I am. I literally feel like I’ve been kicked up the bum by a horse.
‘Yes, but later, when he’s finished work. He said he’d bring Siobhan and the twins so that will be good for you,’ he says to Daisy, tickling her tummy. She curls up, giggling, and accidentally spills her juice on his top.
‘Sorry, Daddy.’
‘Never mind, honey. It’ll dry.’ He gives it a rub then turns to go as there’s a knock at the door. ‘This’ll be them now.’
‘Okay, give me five minutes to get ready,’ I say, standing up with a wince. ‘Mum, you can take the baby downstairs if you like.’
‘Oh no, you must introduce her to everyone,’ Mum says, standing up to go out of the room. ‘I’ll wait outside on the landing until you’re ready.’
Aiden’s family is noisy and cheerful and so full of love and kindness that I can’t even begin to express how grateful I am to be a part of it. They’ve welcomed me with open arms, and they’re just as welcoming to my mum and sister too. As I go downstairs with Poppy and my mum and enter the lounge, a big cheer goes up and I’m surround
ed by congratulations and well wishes. Poppy hardly stirs as I pass her to Aiden’s mum for a cuddle, and I’m immediately enveloped by hugs from Aiden’s aunt and uncle and dad. Someone’s told the elderly couple that live in the end house at the top of the lane, and they arrive too, clutching flowers and a card. I sit in the armchair, absorbing all the joy and smile across at Aiden. He’s watching me with such an expression of love on his face that my heart swells. I’ll never regret following him to Ireland. I belong here. I belong with him. The only thing I regret is letting him go that first time he left. He offered me the world but I was too scared to take it back then. I often wonder where we’d be if I’d have gone with him. I’m no longer convinced we’d have fallen out and I’d have run home. In fact, I’m pretty sure we’d have made it. I don’t know if I wasted those five years of my life in some kind of limbo, or if it was important for my career. The only thing I know is that I’m so grateful we got a second chance to build a life together, because I can’t imagine living my life any other way.
Acknowledgements
To my wonderful editor Charlotte Mursell, thank you for being such a pleasure to work with and for championing this story. Thanks also to the rest of the team at HQ Digital who worked so hard in the production of this book, and to my fellow authors who are always there with words of encouragement.
Big love to my family for their continued love and support, and to you, the reader, without whom all the hours spent writing would be pretty pointless.
I adore Orla and Aiden and think they might be my favourites of all my characters so far. The initial idea for this story was sparked by my interest in hobbit or cob houses, and an early draft had Orla going to interview a man building a cob house by a river. However, my love of animals and nature won, and Aiden became a wildlife photographer. Otters are such beautiful, fascinating creatures and it’s so wonderful that, thanks to conservation efforts and cleaner waterways, they’ve made such a comeback in recent years and can now be found in every county in the UK. I gained inspiration from reading The Otters’ Tale by Simon Cooper, which is a beautifully written account of the otters that live around his angling farm in the south of England. I also dipped into the Halcyon River Diaries by Philippa Forrester and Charlie Hamilton James. This was also a lovely TV series, so if you ever get the chance to watch it, please do. I love a good wildlife documentary! The amazing footage captured never ceases to amaze me. There are some superb wildlife photographers out there, and their work is vital in educating us all and inspiring a passion for nature and conservation.
The Five-Year Plan: The utterly heart-warming and feel good rom com of 2020 Page 32
