“Excuse me?”
“You heard me. You show up maybe once a year with stories about how amazing your life without them is. All these rich, famous men who take you around the world. How do you think that makes them feel?”
She looks down. “I can’t make up for the past.”
“I’ve raised them,” I say fiercely. “Completely alone for almost ten years now. You don’t remember to call on their birthdays, you don’t pay for their school or extracurricular activities, you don’t take them on vacation or spend holidays with them. You’ve never called to see if you could help with anything, so you certainly don’t get to show up now and just take them.”
“I want to do this without fighting about it,” Jenna says. “I deserve a chance.”
“There’s no way I’m giving them up. We’re a family. You just don’t get it.”
“I have rights.”
“No, you don’t. You signed your rights away when you gave the kids to Mom and Dad. And they passed their guardianship rights to me when they died.”
Jenna folds her arms. “The papers I signed say I get to come see my kids whenever I want.”
“With approval. I’ll let you see them, but you’re not taking them. And you’re not staying at my house anymore.”
She rolls her eyes. “What, you expect me to go stay at one of Marnie’s cabins?”
“I don’t care where you stay, but I’m done putting you up. I miss Hazel and I want her to come home.”
“Vi wants to be with me.”
“That’s because you lie, Jenna. You convince the kids you’re a big deal with this glamorous life, and the sad thing is, they’d love you even more if you were just yourself. I’m the one who makes Vi brush her teeth and do her homework and study for exams. You take her to get her hair and nails done, while I pay for groceries and textbooks and braces. What I’m doing is parenting.”
“I’ll take you to court if I have to.”
“Go ahead.” I hold her gaze across the table.
She pushes her plate aside and stands up. “I’m going to say goodbye to the kids before I find a new place to stay while I’m here.”
“No, you’re leaving. Now.”
Jenna glares at me. “What happened to you, Allie? You didn’t used to be like this.”
“I’m just done, Jenna. You come here and upset everything and everyone with your visits, and you act like we should all be so grateful you even bothered. You have no idea what you’ve missed out on with those three kids. They’re absolutely amazing. The best part of my life. I’m proud of them, and—” My voice breaks and I clear my throat. “I’m pretty damn proud of myself, too. They were never a choice for me. I’d do it all over again in a heartbeat.”
My sister picks up her bag and walks out the back door. I’m half-expecting Vi to come storming out of her room and yell at me, but she doesn’t.
I wipe away the tears on my cheeks and text Kelly, asking her to bring Hazel home. And then, I look up Erik’s contact info and dial.
“Hey,” he says, his voice warm though he sounds a little winded. “How are you?”
“I’ve been better.”
“Hey, what’s going on? Are you crying?”
I sniffle and say, “A little.”
“You want me to come over?”
“Are you busy?”
“No, I was just tearing out some landscaping in the front yard for my aunt. I can do this anytime. And the at-home health nurse is here, so I can come right now. I’m a sweaty mess, though. If you don’t mind that—”
“I don’t mind.” I close my eyes and another round of tears hits my cheeks. “If we could just sit out back and talk. Would you mind?”
“Text me your address and I’ll leave right now.”
I nod. “Okay. Thanks.”
“I’m really glad you called me. I’ll be there soon.”
We say goodbye and I go into the bathroom to wash my face before he arrives. Even after all the time we’ve spent apart, Erik feels like my best friend again. He was always there to listen, and I don’t think I’ve ever needed that as much as I do right now.
Fifteen
Easy
I don’t even make it up to Allie’s front door—she’s waiting for me at the curb, her face streaked with tears as she sinks against me.
“Hey, it’s okay,” I say softly, holding her close. “Whatever it is, it’s gonna be okay.”
“My sister wants to take the kids from me,” she says, sounding absolutely wrecked.
“Oh, shit.” I gesture to the side of her house and say, “You want to walk around back and talk about it?”
She nods and wipes her cheeks. We walk up the driveway of her little bungalow around to the backyard, where a small porch holds a metal table and four chairs.
Allie sits down and I sit next to her, taking one of her hands in mine.
“Can Jenna even do that?” I ask her. “Aren’t you the kids’ legal guardian?”
“I don’t know. I told her she can’t, but she said she’ll take me to court over it. And if she does—”
Allie’s face scrunches as she starts crying again. It kills me to see her so upset.
I squeeze her hand gently. “Saying it is one thing, doing it is another. And even if she does do it, she’s got a hard case to make. You’ve done a great job with the kids.”
“I feel sick. I can’t stop worrying about it. I don’t know what I’d do if she took them from me.”
“Why does she want them all of a sudden?”
“I don’t know.” She gives me an imploring look. “What should I do? There’s nothing else in the world that would make me come unglued like this, and…I just can’t think straight.”
The back screen door swings open and a tall blond girl comes out, giving Allie a death glare.
“You always ruin everything,” she says hotly, her cheeks flushed and eyes red as if she’s been crying.
“Vi, I just need a couple minutes, and then we can talk, okay?” Allie says.
“So this is your famous boyfriend?” Vi glares at me.
“Please go inside and we’ll talk in a little bit,” Allie says.
“You’ll just tell me I can’t go with her. She’s my mother. And she’s your sister, how can you treat her this way? Did you kick her out of the house?”
“Vi?” I say. “Can you just give us a few more minutes?”
“Isn’t this what you always wanted anyway?” Vi cries, looking at Allie. “You had to break up with him to take care of us and now Mom wants us back. Everyone can get what they want!”
Allie looks stunned, like someone slapped her. “Who told you that?” she asks Vi.
“Mom. She doesn’t hide everything from me like you do.”
A car pulls into the part of the driveway that extends the length of the house and Hazel gets out, shouldering a backpack and waving to the driver, who looks like Allie’s friend I met the other night, Kelly.
“Hey, is she gone?” Hazel asks as she approaches.
“Yeah, thanks to Aunt Allie!” Vi angrily yells out and Allie buries her face in her hands.
“Coach Zimmerman, what are you doing here?” Hazel asks.
“Uh…”
Vi interjects. “Aunt Allie called him because she got in a fight with Mom. Mom just wants us to live with her and Aunt Allie won’t let us go.”
“What?” Hazel looks at Allie in horror. “She wants us to live with her?”
“Don’t worry, I won’t let it happen,” Allie says.
“Mom’s taking her to court; she told me,” Vi says.
Hazel looks away, trying to hide her frustration.
“I’m old enough to decide for myself!” Vi cries.
“Oh my god,” Allie sighs heavily and meets my eyes. “I’m so sorry.”
“Nothing to be sorry for.”
Hazel breezes past her sister to go into the house, muttering, “You’re such a drama queen, just like our mother.”
“Mother? Wh
y’d you say it like that?” Vi demands, following her. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“It means Aunt Allie’s our real mom! You’re so stupid!” Hazel yells.
Allie gives me a weary look. “I have to go take care of that.”
“I understand.”
“Can I give you a call later?”
“Nah, let’s just talk in person later.”
She scrunches her face and says, “It’s probably gonna stay ugly in there for a while. I’ve got two adolescent girls who can battle for hours.”
I pat her thigh and stand up. “I’ve seen worse, Al.”
She smiles. “You haven’t called me that in so long.”
At the sound of something breaking inside the house, we both rush in.
“Put it down!” a tall teenage boy tells Vi. “You’re not starting this crazy shit.”
Vi turns to us, holding a kitchen plate in the air. There’s another one shattered on the floor.
“Go ahead, but you’ll be sorry,” Allie says calmly.
Vi seems to consider before lowering the plate back to the counter.
“Why is he still here?” she demands, pointing at me. “Aren’t we going to talk about Mom?”
“What more is there to say?” Allie says. “I’m not letting her take you guys.”
“Why not?”
“Because I love you. And I don’t think she’d be able to take good care of you.”
Hazel approaches Allie and throws her arms around her, burying her face in Allie’s shirt.
“Don’t let mom snow you, Vi,” the boy, who has to be Max, says. “She never wanted us before, why does she all of a sudden want us now?”
“She loves us,” Vi says, sobbing.
“She does love you,” Allie says. “She loves you guys very much. Just because she wasn’t able to raise you doesn’t mean she doesn’t love you.”
“Then why won’t you let us go with her?” Vi pleads.
“I’m not going,” Max says.
“Me either,” Hazel says.
“Just me, then,” Vi says to Allie. “I want to be with her and you’d still have Max and Hazel. Will you please just think about it?”
Allie exhales hard. “Vi, I’m sorry. I know none of you asked for this. But we’re a family and we’re staying together. Your mom can move to Greentree Falls if she wants to be part of your life.”
“But California is so much better than Greentree Falls! She gets bored in this little hick town.”
“I don’t want her living here,” Hazel says. “I wish I never had to see her again.”
“Don’t you know how bad that makes her feel?” Vi asks, scowling. “You’re being a bitch!”
“Vi!” Allie scolds.
Vi runs upstairs, sobbing loudly, and Hazel follows, yelling at her.
Allie bends down to pick up pieces of the shattered plate. I bend down next to her.
“Hey, let me get that.”
“No, you don’t need to.”
I put my fingertips beneath her chin, tipping her face up so our eyes meet.
“Let me. There’s not much I can do for you right now, but I can do this. Go take care of your girls, and I’ll be right here when you’re done. It doesn’t matter how long it takes.”
Her eyes soften. “Thank you.”
She stands, takes a deep breath and heads upstairs. Max walks over with a broom and dustpan.
“Hi, I’m Erik,” I say, standing to shake his hand.
“Max. Welcome to our crazy, estrogen-filled household.”
“It’s all good,” I say, chuckling lightly.
He squats down, holding the dustpan, and I sweep the shattered pieces into it.
“Are you and my aunt dating?” he asks me.
I think about how to answer him and say, “I’m not sure, but I hope so.”
“She deserves somebody who will treat her nice. She’s always doing things for us and never for herself.”
“It’s good that you appreciate that. My mom raised me by herself starting when I was fourteen, and I wouldn’t be where I am without her.”
Max looks away. “My mom’s nothing like Aunt Allie. I can’t believe they’re even related.”
“What about you? Do you play any sports?”
“Football and track.”
“Hey, good for you.”
“I was never any good at hockey.” He shrugs.
“I was never any good at football.”
He dumps the plate’s shards into the trash can and puts away the broom and dustpan, then returns.
“Do you like spaghetti?” he asks, gesturing at the food on the table. “I can heat it back up.”
“Yeah, that sounds good.”
He gives me a questioning look. “Microwave okay?”
“Yeah, but let’s cover it up so Allie doesn’t end up with tomato sauce all over.”
As we wait for the spaghetti to reheat, Max gives me a tentative look and asks, “Do you cook for yourself, or do you have like, a chef?”
“During the offseason, I cook for myself but I’m really not great at it,” I admit. “During the season, my teammate Knox’s wife, Reese, cooks healthy meals for the team to take on the road, and she also cooks stuff we can freeze and reheat on our off days.”
“Wow, that’s sick.”
“Yeah it’s pretty cool. We pay her, but it’s a lot of work on her part. She’s also a chef and has her own restaurant. I think she creates the recipes and her staff prepares them. The food is phenomenal, except eggplant. I hate that stuff.”
“I’ve never tried it.”
I give him a knowing look and say, “Don’t.”
“How many hours a day do you work out?”
“During the season, I try to get in lifting and cardio sixty minutes a day, six days a week. I’m slacking while I’m here, though. I go for a run every day and that’s about it.”
“Do you guys have your own gym?”
“We do, at the Carson Center where we play home games.”
We both turn as Allie comes into the kitchen, Hazel following behind her. The worn-out expression on Allie’s face makes me want to take her in my arms and comfort her, but I don’t know if she wants me doing that in front of the kids, so I stay where I am.
“We’re heating up dinner,” Max says.
“Thanks.” Allie meets my gaze across the kitchen and I wink at her.
She’s the only woman I’ve ever winked at. That was always our thing.
Well, there was one other thing. If we were sitting together at dinner with my mom or her parents, she’d hold my hand and slowly, secretly rub my index finger, starting at the base. She’d stroke it thoroughly, mimicking the way she gave me hand jobs. It drove me fucking crazy and made me rock hard at the most inconvenient times.
I’d look over at her innocent smile and revel in knowing her dirty side was just for me. No one else ever got to see it.
When her eyes find mine across her own dining table in her own kitchen, all I see is her exhaustion, both emotional and physical. But she wants me here, sharing this part of life with her and the kids, and that means more to me than she’ll ever know.
Last night wasn’t just sex. It was Allie and I opening ourselves up to each other the way we used to—completely and unconditionally. And the fact that she called me when things got tough earlier means she didn’t close the door on our connection when we left the cabin this morning.
I never thought I’d have another chance with her. I still don’t have all the answers—hell, I hardly have any—but I know she wants me here. As long as that’s the case, I’ll be staying in Greentree Falls until the day I have to report for preseason training camp.
Actually, there’s a little voice in my head asking if I’ll even be able to leave her then. Playing professional hockey is one hell of an adventure—it’s an achievement a lot of players won’t have the chance to appreciate. But it’s not a permanent future. It’ll never love me back. It doesn’t bring me to my
knees the way Allie does. It’s not my forever.
Allie is my forever and has been since we were high school kids.
“Aunt Allie,” Max says, as we’re eating our microwaved spaghetti, scrunching his face in disgust, “that’s my foot.”
She laughs, blushing. “Sorry, I was just moving my leg over.”
“Yeah, sure.”
“Max, people don’t play footsie while wearing tennis shoes.”
“What’s footsie?” Hazel asks.
Allie’s eyes widen as she looks at me across the table, flustered.
“Foot foreplay,” Max mutters.
“Eww!” Hazel looks at Allie and then me. “That’s disgusting. You guys are too old for that.”
“I’m wearing my headphones to bed tonight,” Max says to his sister. “You might want to do the same.”
“Max!” Allie turns to him, appalled. “I’ve never had a man stay overnight, why would you say something like that?”
He shrugs.
“I have to go back to my aunt’s house later to help her and my mom, so you won’t need those headphones,” I assure Max.
The kids go back to their spaghetti and Allie locks eyes with me across the table, the corners of her lips quirking up in a smile.
God, I missed those looks. The ones we always used to communicate without saying a word. Allie’s the only woman I’ve ever had that with.
No way I’m giving her up again.
Sixteen
Allie
The next day, the tables have turned. Hazel is the one crying inconsolably and Vi is calm.
“She says she’s going and you can’t stop her,” Hazel says as she gathers her stuff for the last day of school.
“I can and I will stop her,” I assure Hazel.
“You can’t watch me every second of the day,” Vi says, meeting my gaze in challenge.
I don’t even want to know what my blood pressure is right now. The girls started in as soon as I woke up this morning, and there doesn’t seem to be an end in sight.
“Mom’s staying longer than she planned because she wants to work things out with you,” Vi says. “She knows you’ve done a lot for us and she doesn’t want you guys to fight like this.”
Easy: A Chicago Blaze Hockey Romance Page 10
