by Silva Hart
Is this why I’m still at school? To see Lexi? We hadn’t gotten a chance to talk all day. It felt strange not having her appear at my side in the hall after homeroom. And she was busy doing something else during our sixth period tutoring session.
She’s easily the hottest one of the bunch, slender and stacked with that gilded mane. If she is serious about wanting me and only me, I sure am one lucky son of a bitch. No wonder Carlton is after her. He and every other guy in school probably fantasize over her yearbook picture every night before they fall asleep to dream about the real thing. But I’m the one who’s had her. Has her?
I pause and watch for a minute. She yells something, and the other girls fall silent and listen to her. She commands attention but not in a bitchy way. They genuinely seem to respect her.
She finishes whatever she’s saying, and there’s a bunch of clapping as they fall into a formation. Some girls stand on other girls’ shoulders. Girls toss each other into the air. I’m impressed all over again. There’s a lot of skill and strength involved.
They climb three-high in a pyramid. Lexi creates the peak, balancing on one leg with the other held high overhead. Her long hair blows in the breeze. The splayed teal skirt reminds me of the first time she seduced me in the girls’ locker room after school. She’s been there for me ever since.
I think back to what Anna said at the bus stop. I’ve had my guard up for so long now to keep from getting hurt that it’s become automatic. Could I be fighting against falling in love?
Boxing is as much mental as it is physical. You can’t let the other guy get under your skin or inside your head. But would that apply to love too? I always thought of love as being more like something that just happened to you. As if there really is a naked, flying, baby-god who shoots you with some sort of love arrow and then that’s it, you’re in love.
I have to admit, Lexi is slowly but surely starting to feel like mine. She’s definitely fun to be around. But at the same time, our worlds are so very different that I can’t shake the nagging doubt.
God no, I am not going to start with those thoughts all over again. I just want to find a place to have a cigarette and forget about everything for a few minutes. A squat, cinder block building sits behind one of the football field goal posts. I’ve never been in it before. The door in front of me has “MEN” stamped in white letters.
This could be a bathroom for the football players to have easy access to during games. I can sit and have a smoke before driving to One-Eyed Mike’s for the evening routine. I duck inside. The interior is cool and quiet, exactly what I was looking for. Fall sunlight filters in through the row of windows that line the tops of the walls.
I walk past rows of metal lockers and, in the back of the building, find an open shower area on the left and bathroom stalls, sinks and mirrors on the right. Lighting a cigarette, I lean against the back wall by one of the stalls so I can step into it in case someone comes in. I inhale and close my eyes, letting my head relax back against the smooth tiled wall, drinking in the moment of quiet.
When I open my eyes, I almost drop my cigarette. A girl is standing at the end of the metal lockers in front of me. I didn’t even hear her come in.
“Jett?” It’s Lexi’s best friend Brianna. “I wasn’t expecting to find you in here,” she says.
I take another drag. What does she want me to say?
“I’m glad you are though. My zipper is stuck. All the girls are already out on the field.”
She comes to stand in front of me, lifts her dark hair, and turns her back to me so I can see the zipper on her cheerleader top is halfway up.
“Can you get it?” she asks.
I bend down and see that it’s caught in the red lace of her bra. Placing the cigarette between my lips, I use one hand to hold the shirt and the other to yank the zipper free before slowly raising it the rest of the way.
She turns to face me, not stepping back. I’ve never really paid attention to Brianna before. She always struck me as a spoiled Daddy’s girl who would end up as a serial pageant contestant until some rich guy married her after which she’d push out a kid or two and become a pageant mom.
Standing this close to her, I can see the light flecks swirled in her hazel eyes. Hazel? They could be gray. They’re definitely complicated. Those eyes against her olive skin are downright bewitching. How did I never notice that before?
She trails her fingers down my arm to my hand and slips the cigarette out from between my fingers, maintaining steady eye contact as she raises it to her lips and inhales. She tilts her head to the side and exhales, still gazing deeply at me with those mesmerizing gray, tan, green eyes. It’s one of the sexiest things I’ve ever seen.
She drops the spent butt to the ground and crushes it under her white sneaker. Her fingers move to the bottom of my t-shirt. “May I?”
“Sure, why not?”
Her hands snake under my shirt and brush over my abs, her fingers tracing the definition. “Holy shit,” she breathes. “Lexi’s lucky.”
Brianna’s touch is as delicate as a butterfly wing, and I’m still trying to figure out the eye color in her upturned face. That and do I really want to do this? She’s Lexi’s best friend.
Her hands slide to the button of my jeans. Always that penetrating eye contact. I’m oddly spellbound. Never would I have imagined Brianna doing anything like this, let alone with me. Someone could walk in here at any minute and see her in front of me right out in the open. I hadn’t heard her come in. What makes her think we’ll have any kind of warning before someone else enters?
And she mentioned Lexi. Lexi wants me. She treats me better than pretty much anyone ever has. I keep accepting other women to … what? … protect myself? Probably. I mean, look at her. Look at her parents. Look at where she lives. And then look at me and how I’m living. I can’t get too attached. It will never work between us. My mind replays the well-worn phrases, but their weight has somehow diminished. At this point, am I trying to convince myself that’s how it is? Because it sure as hell doesn’t feel like the truth anymore.
Brianna is reaching into my boxers, those hypnotizing eyes never leaving mine. But Lexi is the one I’m thinking about. I grab Brianna’s wrist to stop her. Her look turns questioning.
“I can’t do this,” I hear myself say.
Galloway slams through the door followed by two thugs. Evidently, since Roman couldn’t get the job done at the football game, Carlton changed him out for two hulking guys. One is Brad or Chad or something like that and might be on the football team. I’ve never seen the other giant jock.
Carlton is holding his phone up toward me. He must have thought he would get a picture or video of me in a compromising position that he could show Lexi. When he sees nothing’s happening, he looks disappointed and puts the phone in his pocket.
Brianna rises, her face twisted with regret. “I’m sorry, Jett. They made me do it,” she whispers.
I’m so damn sick of this elite asshole and his goons harassing me. Of course he had to bring them. He can’t beat me otherwise. I wonder if they have weapons too. My jaw clenches and my peace evaporates, replaced with an instant, consuming rage.
They stop in front of me, fanning around me in the formation I know all too well. Carlton opens his mouth. Before he can utter a word, I smash the nearest stall door into one giant’s face. He screams and staggers backward, blood pouring from his nose.
I swing a right hook as hard as I can at Carlton’s smug mug and connect solidly with his temple, the same spot Grant got me with the rock at The Overlook. He lurches off balance, and I slam my fist into his stomach. He hunches over, retching and gasping.
A blade flashes in the hand of hulk number two. He jabs at me. I jump back, narrowly avoiding it, grab his outstretched wrist, and shoot my other hand up into his elbow bending it at an unnatural angle. He screams and drops the switchblade. I grab his shirt and prepare to slam his head into the nearest sink.
“Stop!”
The one I got with the door is standing next to a cop. Blood covers the front of his shirt. The cop has his hand on his holster as if he intends to draw on me.
I put my hands up. “It was self-defense.”
The cop recites my Miranda rights as he approaches. “Turn around nice and easy.”
I do as he says and metal circles both of my wrists. He doesn’t even ask me what happened. What about my side of the story?
“Let’s go, tough guy,” the cop says.
I glare at Carlton’s and his friends’ smirking faces as the cop leads me past them. Their satisfaction at the success of their little trap makes me wish I’d hit them harder.
Chapter 34
The cop leads me to a cruiser and stuffs me into the back. We drive in silence. There’s no point in trying to defend myself. It’s my word against theirs, and those privileged dicks come out on top every time.
This station is the one closest to the school and different from the one we went to with the lawyer. Once there, another cop searches my pockets, removing everything before leading me to a ten-by-ten holding cell along the back wall of the station. The place has a mostly open layout, and everyone can see me.
“Don’t I get—”
“Shaddap. You’re gonna cool off in here for a little while before we process you.”
Fuming, I sit on the cold metal bench. They’re not even going to take my statement? Aren’t there protocols they have to follow? Or don’t those apply to the have-nots? I watch the police activity, which, from what I can tell, involves a whole lot of standing around bullshitting.
I don’t know how much time passes before a golden head appears at the front door. Lexi. What’s she doing here? She marches to the front desk, head held high, and speaks to the officer there. She looks as regal as a princess talking to a peasant.
I stand, wrapping my hands around the metal bars, straining to hear what she’s saying over the chatter and laughter of the surrounding cops. The officer leads her to me. As usual, she’s wearing an ass-skimming skirt that shows off her cheerleader legs. Heads turn as she walks through the room.
“On what charges is Jett Dixon being held?” she asks the officer as they approach.
“Assault and battery on school grounds.”
“It was self-defense. I overheard Carlton Galloway plotting with his friends to get Jett alone and teach him a lesson.”
“A lesson for what?”
“Cheating on me.”
The cop looks confused. “Is Jett your boyfriend?”
She glances at me and hesitates for the barest fraction of a second. “No, but Carlton doesn’t know that.”
“Now why would Carl—” The cop stops himself and shakes his head as if he’s gotten away from the point. “So, you didn’t witness anything?”
“Oh, I saw plenty the first time it happened.”
I gape at her through the bars. She’s lying for me? To a police officer? My own mom wouldn’t do that for me.
“A couple weeks ago, Jett and I went to The Overlook. Carlton and his friends showed up drunk and came to our car. When Jett got out to talk to them, they all jumped him. I had to watch from the car, helpless, while they knocked him unconscious with a rock and kicked him.” She stops, blinking back honest-to-goodness tears at the fabricated memory. Her chin even trembles a bit. “They kicked him while he was unconscious, and I couldn’t do anything.” Inhaling a quivering breath, she says, “It seemed like forever before he finally woke up.”
The cop turns to me, taking in my height and bulk. “They beat you up?” He sounds skeptical.
I lift my shirt so he can see the faded but still evident bruise on my side and push my hair back to reveal the still healing scab on my temple where the rock split it open.
Lexi presses on. “They’re cowards. There were four of them then and three of them today.”
So they kept the stadium fight to themselves. Figures.
“They won’t leave him alone. If he hadn’t defended himself today, who knows what would have happened? They’re the ones who should be in here right now, not Jett.”
The cop takes his cap off, scratches his scalp through thinning brown hair with a sausage-sized finger, and returns his cap to his head. “This was an incident on school property. It’ll have to go to court. I got no say in the matter.”
“But why aren’t Carlton and his friends in here too?” Lexi persists.
“They’re probably at the hospital,” the cop says. “Jett here did a number on all of them.”
“In self-defense,” Lexi says firmly. Her mood suddenly shifts. She tilts her chin down, gazing up at the man through her thick, dark lashes. “You do believe me, don’t you?”
Is she flirting with him? I’ve never seen Lexi flirt with anyone but me, and an unfamiliar sensation wraps around my heart with an uncomfortable squeeze.
The cop stammers and turns lipstick red.
She reaches out, lightly touches his arm, and turns on her snake-charmer smile. “There has to be something I can do.”
It’s practically an invitation. She looks so enticing, I don’t see how the cop doesn’t take her by the elbow right then and there and lead her to a secluded room somewhere to have his way with her. I could bend the bars to make sure that doesn’t happen.
“I’ll have to see what his bail is set at,” he says.
Bail? They haven’t even charged me with anything.
“Are you okay?” Lexi turns to me, her blue eyes searching my face for signs of fresh injuries.
I nod still not believing her brazen lies and emotional acting job on my behalf. I want to hold her, to thank her for always being there for me when no one else ever is.
The cop returns with my envelope of things and unlocks the cell door. “You can go. No one pressed any charges. However the school decides to deal with you is outside our jurisdiction.”
Bastards. If Lexi hadn’t shown up, how long were they going to let me cool my heels in here? They would never have done that to Carlton or the others. God, I’m so sick of their wealth–wealth they didn’t even earn–getting them passes on every damn thing.
I follow Lexi out the station door to a gold BMW and gingerly sit on the cream leather, not wanting to get anything dirty. Lexi reaches over and clasps my hand as she drives.
“I’m so sorry that happened to you, Jett.”
“Don’t worry about it. It’s over.” I squeeze her hand. “Thanks for being there for me. Great acting job by the way.”
She grins. “It was fun. Did you see how red his face got?”
I smile back at her, happier than I’ve been in a long time. “Yeah, that was great.”
“What’s your address?”
And here it is. The moment of truth I’d been shielding from her. My happiness evaporates like dew under a summer sunrise. This is it. This is when she finds out I’m nothing but a homeless street rat and comes to her senses.
I suddenly realize that this matters to me. Lexi matters. I’ve come to enjoy her company, seeing her smile, and hearing her chatter. Feeling all the affection she gives me so selflessly and easily has been nice. What am I going to do without it?
My fists clench at my sides. I’ll do what I’ve always done, continue on living each day as best I can. When you get knocked down, you get back up and either take another swing or leave the ring and move on to the next fight.
It can’t be helped. She’s bound to find out. May as well be now. “One-Eyed Mike’s.”
“The gym?”
“Yeah.”
She doesn’t ask any more questions, which I’m thankful for. One-Eyed Mike’s is dark and locked up for the night by the time we get there.
“I’ll see you tomorrow,” she says.
“I don’t want you to go.” My lips press together after these words escape. I’m exposed, vulnerable.
She cocks her head at me coquettishly. “Why, Jett Dixon, if I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were coming on to me.”
Overco
me with appreciation and affection for her, I lean over, pull her head to mine, and kiss her more tenderly than I’ve ever kissed her before.
She breaks away and smiles up at me. “Well, okay then. If you insist.”
Lexi follows me into the dark gym. My pulse races as I flip on the lights. I’m pretty sure she’ll take one look at my room and make some excuse to leave. That’s probably what I would do if I were her.
My heartbeat thuds in my ears as we pass the raised boxing rings and heavy bags. Steeling myself, I turn down the short hallway then into my musty closet of a room. I see it through her eyes, taking in the cot, ratty blankets, worn metal lockers, and smell of stale sweat. It’s a universe apart from what she’s used to.
She doesn’t move or make a sound as she absorbs what I’m showing her and the realization sinks in that I don’t have parents or a home or belongings or anything like other kids. This is what and who I am. This is my life. No more secrets.
Her silence is making me uncomfortable. “I need a quick shower,” I say, grabbing my things. “I’ll only be a minute.”
I hope she stays but won’t be surprised if I come back to an empty room. After all, now she can no longer harbor any fantasies about what I might have to offer. Standing here, it’s quite obviously nothing. And didn’t I leave after she asked me to stay while she got cleaned up after she seduced me in the girls’ locker room? God, that seems so long ago now.
Standing under the hot water, my muscles relax after the crazy day. With my back to the spray, I soap up my face and neck, working the lather into my shoulders.
Suddenly, soft hands slide over mine, pressing into the foam and smoothing it over my back. Lexi. I’d know those hands anywhere. I relax again.
I turn and gaze down at her. She’s exquisite in front of me. She starts to kneel, but I raise her up. She looks puzzled. I owe her. I want to thank her. The warm water cascades over us as our embrace turns to passion.
“Oh my God, Jett,” she whispers, and here in the shower of the gym I call home I finally know that I’m not some passing interest for her. She wants me for me and no other reason. She wants only me. I vow I will never be with another girl as long as Lexi Moore wants me.
