by L A Cotton
But it wasn’t enough.
“Slide your legs around me.” I held Eva on top of me as she anchored herself around my waist, our bodies joined impossibly close.
“It’s deeper,” she breathed, rocking gently.
“It’s everything.” I kissed her, pushing my tongue into her mouth. I wanted to drown in her. To fall so deep I never resurfaced.
Being with Eva was like floating on air. She made me forget. She made me feel.
But most of all she made me feel worthy.
“Oh God,” she panted, her skin flushed, damp and glistening. I ran my hand down her spine, over the curve of her hip, pulling her closer, harder.
“I love you,” I whispered against her mouth. “I love you so much it freaks me the fuck out.” Eva gripped me tighter, riding me like she was born to do it. I was so blinded by pleasure, it was hard to tell where I ended and she began.
“More,” she cried. “More, Rafe.”
Our bodies were slick with sweat, our hearts a frantic cacophony of beats. I grasped her hips as I shifted to the edge of the bed, thrusting upward.
“Rafe, oh God, I can’t...” Eva’s nails raked over my shoulders, as she shattered around me. Pure ecstasy shot down my spine as I came hard.
I fell back against the mattress, pulling Eva with me.
“That was...” Her small sigh of contentment tickled my jaw.
“It was you and me, Starshine.”
“I like that.” Her fingers trailed letters of love over my skin.
We lay there, sated and silent, until Eva whispered, “I don’t want this to come between us, Rafe. Promise me.” She leaned up to look at me.
“Me and Levi have always managed to find our way back, but this time... it’s different,” I confessed.
“You’re family, that means something. You know it does.” Silence enveloped us, and then, she added, “He’s hurting too, Rafe.”
My chest tightened. I knew Eva cared for him. She wouldn’t have been the girl I’d fallen so hard for if she didn’t. But I couldn’t deny that a selfish part of me wished there was no Levi in the equation.
“It’s late,” I said gently edging her off my body. “We should sleep.”
Hurt flashed in her eyes but she didn’t argue, slipping between the sheets and giving me room to climb in beside her. “Tomorrow will be a better day,” she said, pressing a single kiss to my lips.
I wanted to kiss her back, to reassure her that we were okay. I wanted to leave Levi at the bedroom door where he belonged. But he was back here with us now, wedged into the space between us, and I hated it.
“Rafe...”
“Get some sleep, Eva.” I slipped an arm behind my head and closed my eyes.
Eva let out a soft sigh, rolling onto her side. I silently willed her to say something. To start a fight and call me out on my shitty behavior.
But she didn’t, and that’s how I fell asleep.
With Eva still and silent beside me and a million miles between us.
“You look like shit,” Hudson greeted me as I walked into the suite. “Coffee’s in the pot.”
“Thanks, have you seen Eva?”
“She left with Letty about twenty minutes ago.”
So that’s why I’d woken up alone.
“How did she seem?”
“Pissed.” He leveled me with a knowing look. “I take it you’re the reason she slammed the door so hard she woke Damon?”
“I screwed up.” I ran a hand down my face. “I really screwed up.”
“Welcome to my world.” Hud leaned back against the counter. He was shirtless, sweatpants hanging low on his hips, but it wasn’t anything I hadn’t already seen a hundred times before.
“I still can’t believe you went after her.”
“Come on, Hud, we’ve been over this. I love her.”
“Yeah, but you fucking jeopardized everything for her. You just walked away.”
“You know that’s not how it happened. I just needed to get away. For once in my life, I needed to put myself first.” He glared at me. “You don’t get what it’s like to be responsible for someone else.”
“You’re not respon—”
“It’s always me, Hud. I pick him up when he falls. I nurse him when he’s sick. I hold his fucking hair back when he’s on detox, puking his guts up. Our relationship isn’t healthy. I guess I just hadn’t wanted to see it before Eva came along.”
“Shit, I know, man.” Guilt edged into Hudson’s expression. “You’re his person.”
My head hung low as my best friend’s word sank into me.
I was Levi’s person.
Always had been.
“What are you going to do?”
“Fucked if I know. He won’t even talk to me right now.”
“But he talked to Eva.” It wasn’t a question. “She tell you what they talked about?”
I shook my head.
A faint smirk tugged the corner of his mouth. “Did you give her a chance to tell you?”
“We didn’t exactly talk much.”
“You’re more alike than you realize.”
“Who, me and Eva?”
“No, asshole, you and Levi. You’re jealous of their relationship.”
“I’m not... yeah, I am.”
“And that’s okay. You’re only human. But she isn’t in love with your brother, she’s in love with you. What you need to figure out is, if you can deal with her being in both your lives. Because if I learned anything about Eva, it’s that she has a huge fucking heart. She’s going to fight for him, maybe as much as she’ll fight for you.”
“I know.”
Fuck, I knew.
“So the way I see it is, you need to man the fuck up and do the right thing here. You love Eva and she loves you. Only you can decide if you let Levi come between that.”
My brows furrowed. “Who are you right now?”
“Hey, I’m not just a pretty face.”
“Maybe you should take some of your own advice sometime and call—”
“Do not finish that sentence.”
“What?” I grinned, some of the tension in the room ebbing away. “I’m just saying, you sound like a guy in tune with his feelings, a guy ready to take the next step maybe?”
“Fuck you, Hunter. We’re not talking about me, we’re talking about you. And you’re the one who has to play happy families with his girl and his brother. Good luck with that.” He waved me off and stalked out of the room.
As if he hadn’t just slapped me with a big dose of reality.
Eva
* * *
“I can’t believe you’re makin’ me do this,” I grumbled, watching people rush around the studio, making the final preparations for our interview with The Rock Report.
“I will always support decisions I think are in your best interest, even if you hate me for it.” Letty gave me a weak smile.
“I don’t hate you. I just... Are you sure this will work?” The idea of going on TV and talking about my relationship with Rafe terrified me. It was the last thing I’d expected when I agreed to come back to the tour.
But here we were, with less than ten minutes until we went on.
“It’s the best option we have right now. We need to control the story. You’ve seen some of the headlines.”
I grimaced, looking out across the studio. Riley was busy talking to the production assistant, finalizing the approved question list. Alistair had granted The Rock Report the exclusive, but insisted his team had overall say over the direction of the interview.
“Have you spoken to Rafe yet? I saw him earlier; he didn’t look good.”
“It’s been a busy mornin’. I haven’t—” Drawing in a shaky breath, I turned slowly to find Rafe standing there.
“I’d better go check in with Riley.” She squeezed my hand before disappearing.
“Hi,” Rafe said, rubbing the back of his neck. “You were gone when I woke up.”
“Letty needed me for some
thing.” My eyes darted off to the right, watching Letty. But Rafe stepped closer, putting himself in my line of sight.
“Eva, about last night... I was a jerk.”
“You think?” My eyes cut to his. “You promised not to let him come between us and then right after we...” I stopped myself, lowering my voice. “We’re supposed to be a team.”
“We are.” He reached for my hand, his touch melting some of my anger. “It’s my issue to deal with. I can’t promise I’ll always handle things well, but it doesn’t change how I feel about you.”
“I just want you and Levi to—”
“Eva,” his voice softened. “Not now, please. I know we need to talk about him, and we will. But not before we go on television and publicly announce our relationship.”
“Are you scared?” I asked him.
“Scared?”
“It’s a big pretty thing to go on TV and...” My voice trailed off as I dropped my gaze to the floor.
What we were doing?
Rafe cupped my face, forcing me to look at him. “You think I’m scared about telling the world I love you?”
“It’s a big deal.”
“I don’t want to hide you, Eva. It was never about that. I just didn’t want to drag you into the limelight before you were ready.”
We’d moved closer. Without even realizing, my hands had ended up on Rafe’s chest, and one of his arms was looped around my waist. “All I care about is you. If this makes things easier, after... everything, then I’m all in. Alistair and Letty know what they’re doing. She prepped you, right?”
I nodded. We’d spent all morning going over my answers, over a mountain of pancakes and fresh fruit.
“Their host knows the drill, so none of the questions should throw us.”
“And afterward?”
Rafe smiled. “Afterward, the whole world will know who you really belong to.” The heat in his words was reflected in his intense gaze. There was no jealousy there this time. No torment.
Just raw possession.
He dropped a kiss on my head, lingering there. A camera flash went off and I glanced over to find Letty snapping photos of us.
“Eva, Rafe,” someone from the studio approached us. “We need you on set now.”
“Ready?” Rafe asked me, his gaze unwavering even with the assistant standing there, gawking at us.
I gave him a little nod. “Let’s do it.”
Maybe this wouldn’t fix things with Levi, but it would go some way to fixing the damage caused to the band’s reputation.
All I had to do was sit and answer a few questions.
And breathe.
The lights were blinding, making it difficult to see Kinney Gretchen, one of The Rock Report’s most popular interviewers.
“So, Eva. Is it okay if I call you Eva?”
“Sure, everyone else does.” Smile. Don’t forget to smile.
Rafe squeezed my hand. They were wedged between our thighs, barely visible, but enough to hint at our intimacy.
Kinney chuckled. “Eva, it is. I have to say, I think we were all a little surprised when the news broke that you’d returned home to Tennessee. I hope everything’s okay?”
“Everything’s fine. I just needed some space.”
“Being on tour with four guys will do that to a person,” Rafe added. He looked so laid back, so at ease. While inside, I was a ball of nerves.
“It must get kind of crazy,” she prompted.
“It has its moment. But honestly, it isn’t as glamorous as it seems. Some of us just want the quiet life, you know?”
“You’re trying to tell me, Rafe Hunter from Black Hearts Still Beat wants the quiet life?”
“One day, sure, why not?” He shrugged, and I had to force myself not to stare at him. But it was difficult. Usually Rafe was quiet, preferring the shadows to the spotlight, but today, he was so enigmatic. Radiant.
He was happy.
“A girl has to wonder, is there a reason for this new outlook?” Her smile grew as she glanced from Rafe to me and back again.
“What are you getting at, Kinney?”
“Oh, come on, Rafe. I’m sure I’m not the only one who has noticed how close you and Eva are sitting. Is there something you want to tell us?”
“I don’t know,” Rafe turned his attention on me. “Is there, Starshine?”
My heart stopped, my lips parting on a silent gasp.
“I think you rendered Eva speechless.” Kinney’s voice was drowned out by the roar of blood between my ears.
“I...” Concern flickered across Rafe’s expression. No amount of Letty’s pep talks or briefings from the production team could have prepared me for this moment. I was barely used to hearing Rafe say he loved me. Yet alone, ready to share it with the world.
“Eva gets a little gun-shy.” He slipped his arm around my shoulder.
You can do this. You have to do this.
Sucking in a sharp breath, I smiled up at him “Eva, can speak for herself.”
“Seriously, you guys are the cutest. I can hear hearts breaking all over the country.” Kinney shifted.
“Yeah, well,” I said, “you should try bein’ on a tour bus with him.”
“So the two of you...” She waggled her finger. “It’s serious?”
“I can’t speak for Eva, but I knew the first time I laid eyes on her.” Rafe spoke with complete conviction.
“So it’s official? Rafe Hunter is off the market?”
“Rafe Hunter was never on the market, Kinney, you know that.” He winked at her.
“Touché. That can’t be easy though, trying to navigate a new relationship whilst on tour... together. How are the rest of the guys taking it?”
Rafe stiffened slightly. We knew Kinney was going to bring up the guys, that was the whole point. But he was still hurting over his fight with Levi.
Running my hand along his leg, I rested it on his knee. “It’s not like we’re in each other’s pockets twenty-four seven. I’m on the other tour bus. The band still have their space, and I have mine. I think that’s important, you know?”
Kinney nodded. “And what about your relationship with Levi? There’s been a lot of rumors flying around that maybe the two of you were getting close...”
“People see what they want to see. Me and Levi are friends. It’s not easy bein’ the only female artist on the tour, but all the guys have been really supportive and have made me feel nothing but at home.”
“So Levi gave the two of you his blessing?”
“Come on, Kinney.” Rafe let out a harsh breath. “His blessing? Really, what kind of question is that?”
“Don’t shoot the messenger.” She held up her hands. “But everyone out there will want to know what’s really going on between the three of you.”
Beads of sweat trailed down my back. She was pushing too hard, and Rafe was growing increasingly frustrated. It rippled off him, permeating the air around us.
“The last thing I want to do is come between Rafe and Levi, or Rafe and the band.”
“I’m sure there are a lot of fans out there who wouldn’t mind finding themselves in the middle of a Hunter brother sandwich.”
“Wow, you went there,” Rafe scoffed. My hand flattened against his thigh. Kinney had gone off script. It wasn’t a total surprise—Letty had warned me she might try—but I felt a pang of disappointment all the same.
“Can I level with you, Kinney?” I said, rolling my shoulders back. “I might be a girl from a small town in Tennessee, but you think I don’t know this kind of thing sells records? I thought we were here to set the record straight, and the truth is this... Rafe and Levi are brothers. I would never want to get between them. Ever. I know how important family is. I spent most of senior year in the hospital fightin’ for my life. I wasn’t supposed to survive.” Nervous energy vibrated through me, my body trembling with every word. “But I did. I got a second chance when so many don’t, and I want to make the most of it.
“
I love makin’ music and I love performin’. It’s crazy and new, and I’m probably goin’ to regret sayin’ this the second I walk off stage, but I love Rafe and I’m excited to see where the future takes us.” My eyes flicked to his, that same possessiveness I’d seen earlier, burning in his stormy gaze.
“You heard it here first people. The Sweetheart of Country has gone and won the heart of one of Rock’s most beloved stars. So Rafe, what can we expect for the band in the coming months?” He blinked, breaking the simmering connection between us. “Is Levi over his stomach flu? Will he be at the Pepsi Center tonight?”
“We’re feeling good. Eva’s back where she belongs, and fans coming out to see us tonight can expect us to raise the roof off the place.”
“Sounds like Black Hearts Still Beat fans can expect quite the show. Well, a huge thank you for coming on the show. I don’t think I’m only one who will be rooting for the two of you.”
“Thanks for having us.”
“Thank you,” I added, reality crashing down around me.
Kinney looked right at the camera as she wrapped up the interview. “Rafe Hunter is off the market, but with the three remaining Black Hearted boys still all single, there’s hope for us yet.” She winked. “I’m Kinney Gretchen, and this has been The Daily Rock Down.”
“Cut,” someone yelled. And Kinney began untangling her mic from her body. “Thanks guys, we appreciate it.”
“What the fuck was that?” Rafe growled.
“Come on, Rafe,” she gave him an easy smile. “You know how it is. I was only giving the fans what they wanted.”
“Hanging us out to dry, more like.” He leaped up, running a hand down his face.
“Rafe,” Alistair boomed as he crossed the studio to us. “Kinney, couldn’t stick to the script, I see.”
“Look, I did you a favor. The fans are chomping at the bit for news on Eva and the band. Now they have it.”
“We’ll see about that.” Alistair levelled her with a hard look. “You two, head back to the hotel with security. I’ll see you there later.”
“Good luck with the show tonight,” Kinney said around a thin smile. “And no hard feelings, yeah.”
